King Rat: No Mercy
by EzraTheBlue
Summary: A year after the events of King Rat, the Sanzo party find themselves pulled into a strange seal and separated. Where have they ended up? Who has called them here, and what do they want from Gojyo? Rated for mature content. Gojyo/Sanzo. Sequel to King Rat. Read and review!
1. An Unusual Anniversary

**King Rat, No Mercy**

Author's Notes: I never thought I'd end up back here. No, really, I honestly never planned for a sequel to King Rat. I had hoped to close some of the things I'd left open in "Who Is King Rat?" but I was never satisfied with the way it came out when I tried to write it in that format. And then I had an idea. An awful idea. A wonderful, awful idea. And then this happened.

So, here we are. If you did not read King Rat, you may wish to do so before reading this. In spite of myself, I still think it's a pretty decently-written story. I do attempt to play catch-up in this chapter, but there are a few details in King Rat that are going to be important later. Yes, this story is still m-preg. (Sort of.)

I have considerably cut back on one of my more self-indulgent inclusions, the "Suggested Tracks." However, there are a few that will come up later. (Suggested Track indicates that I wrote a scene with a certain song in mind to go with it, like the score of a movie. I suggest finding the song on Youtube or the like, as I feel it adds some different depth to the scenes.)

**Disclaimer:** The characters of Saiyuki are not mine. The original characters and this particular scenario are.

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**1: An Unusual Anniversary**

The weather in Western China on a certain summer day was perfect, the air clean and clear. Or, perhaps it would have been clean and clear, but at a certain shrine near the base of a mountain range, it was polluted by two cigarettes and an incense burner. Two men stood by the shrine, one folding his hands in prayer, the other shuffling his feet like a boy with stage fright. About ten meters away, their jeep was parked on a flat part of the path while their two companions waited for them. The mountains themselves were barren, devoid of trees and with only small, frail plants littering the rocky pathways, but this could only indicate that there were no ill spirits there to listen. Genjo Sanzo, the 31st of China, muttered a prayer, while his comrade and friend, Sha Gojyo stared around impatiently.

"... and on this, the anniversary of your birth, we offer this wish for your good fortune and health..." Sanzo sounded bored as he faced the shrine to Guan Yin, which was surrounded by old shoes and small packages of rice. Still he droned on, even as Gojyo sighed aloud.

"Is this really necessary?" He demanded wearily. Sanzo paused, giving him a withering glare. "No, really. It's not like they're here. It's not like they've aged on the Fragrant Mountain. They're not a year old yet, Kanzeon Bosatsu said they'd stay as old as they were the last time we saw them. What's the point?"

"It has been a year since their birth," Sanzo grumbled. "They may not have achieved a year yet, but the point remains."

"That's stupid. Leaving a message for a statue and hoping the goddess delivers it. Why can't we just eat a damn cake?" Gojyo glowered at Sanzo. "I've been asking for cake for days in anticipation, but there's no cake." Sanzo scoffed.

"Where are we going to get a cake? I don't have a cake. You don't have a cake. There's no cake for fifty kilometers. If you say cake one more time-"

"Shut up, I get it," Gojyo grumbled. He rubbed his head, groaning under his breath.

"Is something wrong?" Sanzo cocked his brow.

"I don't feel well. Head and stomach aching. Nothing important."

"Probably drank too much last night," Sanzo scoffed.

"Oi, are you guys done yet?" Goku yelled from the Jeep. "It's hot and I'm hungry!" Gojyo tossed Goku a glare, but turned back to the shrine.

"Do you have anything to add to the offering?" Sanzo asked.

"Yeah, sure," Gojyo sighed. He turned to the shrine of Guan Yin, glanced around at the litany of weather-beaten shoes left around it, and took a moment to reflect on the past year.

It had been a full year, hadn't it? It hardly seemed like three-hundred and sixty-five days had passed, and yet, throughout their travail through China, the days had added up. To him, it still seemed like barely a week had passed since he had made a certain agreement with Sanzo, and since Kanzeon Bosatsu decided to "bless" him with two children. Hardly a moment had passed since he laid out across a riverbank, with Sanzo holding him by the elbows and Hakkai at his heels, and he himself birthed them. (He barely understood it, and he'd been there.) And felt like it had been but a blink of the eye since Kanzeon Bosatsu spirited his boys away to the Fragrant Mountain, promising to return Sha Yohei and Sha Eiji when the party returned from India. And yet, the year had passed.

They'd kept busy, of course. There were youkai to attack, youkai to kill, youkai to run away from, youkai to run away from _very_ quickly, and hundreds of miles of desert, forest, jungle, and plain across which to travel, upon which to get lost. There were rivers to ford and mountains to traverse. And there were friends.

Little had really changed between the four of them, at least not that he could tell. They were still the same men they had been when they had left. Only one bond had changed at all, and Gojyo could not honestly say it was for worse or better.

He first recognized there was any change at all only a few days after saying farewell to Yohei and Eiji. They had stopped at another inn after a few days of travel, and after dinner and a few drinks, Hakkai took out the playing cards to draw for roommates. "No need," Sanzo had muttered. He got to his feet and glowered down at Gojyo. "I'm going to bed." With that, he swept off, his robes fluttering behind him. Goku seemed to ignore him, continuing to eat, as Gojyo glanced at Hakkai.

"Does that mean...?"

"I think it does," Hakkai affirmed brightly. "My, how charming."

"Charming ain't the word for it. It's weird." Gojyo narrowed his eyes and tented his fingers in thought. "I thought if I ever got a steady girl, she'd be sweet and smiley and cute. Make me breakfast wearing nothing but an apron, stuff like that. I didn't think he'd keep glaring and sneering at me. But I guess I can't expect him to change."

"Certainly you have some expectations of him," Hakkai suggested.

"No, not really. All he said was that he would be there for me. I'm not asking him to love me, or even to like me."

"But if you two are going to act together for your boys, shouldn't you want him to like you?" Hakkai leaned forward curiously. Gojyo shrugged, cracking another beer can open.

"Like I said. I can't expect him to change. I don't think he likes anything." He began to gulp the can.

"He liked Yohei and Eiji," Hakkai replied. Gojyo frowned.

"You could tell?"

"He was affectionate, in his way. I think he almost smiled once. And I'm almost certain I heard him humming to them."

"Humming?" Gojyo leaned forward and lowered his voice. "Humming what?" Hakkai grinned slowly.

"I think it was 'You Are My Sunshine.'" Gojyo swallowed a laugh.

He found Sanzo in one room with both of their belongings. There were two futons, and Sanzo was already stretched out across one, his robe halfway-off, with the newspaper in his lap. Gojyo stripped himself down, laid on the other one, and stared at the ceiling. Sanzo folded down the newspaper. He stared over at Gojyo for a moment, and finally sighed heavily. This got Gojyo's attention.

"Yes?"

"Yes, yourself. Were you expecting something from me?"

"What, you mean, a good something? Like, the good something we used to do?" Sanzo didn't reply, which led Gojyo to assume the affirmative. "I can't. Hakkai told me that if I planned on doing it, I should wait six weeks to fully heal."

"I see. That's fine. Whatever you want." Sanzo picked his paper up again. Gojyo quickly turned over to look at him again.

"Sanzo?" Sanzo folded down the corner of the newspaper. "Uh, is there something else I should call you? I thought Sanzo was just your title, not your name."

"There is nothing else you can call me. If you don't like that, then call me nothing at all."

"Sure thing, Mr. Nothing-At-All," Gojyo joked, until the familiar harisen flew from Sanzo's free hand at his forehead. Gojyo swatted the paper fan away, laughing, and lay flat on his back, staring back at the ceiling with a grin. "At least you're dependable."

Six weeks later, Sanzo did make good on his offer of "whatever you want." It was late in the night, and they were forced to split two beds between four men. Hakkai and Sanzo had won the beds, and Goku had fallen asleep on the floor. Gojyo was awake, smoking a cigarette out the window, when he felt a brief tap on his shoulder. Sanzo was stripped down to his pants, and he held out a cigarette as well. They touched the tips together, and Sanzo's flared to life. They were quiet together for a minute, and Gojyo let a slow smile creep across his face. Something felt good about simply being beside him like that. He turned his head and pressed his lips against Sanzo's bare collarbone. Sanzo turned his lazy eyes towards him. Gojyo smirked. "Would you like some privacy?"

He didn't have to say anything. He laid his free hand over Gojyo's, and gripped it tight. He quietly led him from the room, down the corridor, and into the tavern's bath. They didn't have to say anything, to make any arrangements, even to negotiate position. Gojyo had realized a long time ago that things often worked better with Sanzo if he didn't talk. He pressed his palms the wall and leaned his body forward, Sanzo turned the water on and wrapped his arms around his waist, and they enjoyed twenty minutes of sheer bliss. Gojyo's few moans were muffled by the sound of the shower, and Sanzo bit his grunts of effort into Gojyo's shoulder. As they separated their bodies, Gojyo's weak knees nearly gave out from under him, and Sanzo caught him around the navel, cradling his body close and keeping him upright. Gojyo managed to turn around and hug onto Sanzo's waist. Sanzo managed to stay upright, running his hands through Gojyo's hair and grabbing at his scalp. Finally, Sanzo's knees gave out as well, and Gojyo wrapped his arms around him. They were quiet, and Gojyo managed to lift his head and kiss Sanzo's cheek. Sanzo pressed his cheek to Gojyo's and said nothing.

They didn't need to say anything.

That was simply the way it was. If one wanted the other, he was simply there. There was no talk of love, no talk of 'relationship,' no talk of 'us,' and somehow, Gojyo was okay with that. They had sex when they wanted it, and nothing else changed. They argued, they nagged at each other, they were simply the worst of friends. Just like Gojyo had said, he couldn't ask Sanzo to be anything but what he was. The only thing they agreed to cooperate on were two distant children. It happened to be Sanzo's second-favorite ammunition to tame a drunken hanyou, ranking only just below Magnum rounds:

"Are you going to act like this around your sons?"

Turnabout was, of course, fair play:

"Hey, man, you gonna act this cold to your kids?"

After insults like this were thrown, they would sometimes avoid talking to each other for a few hours, but they never apologized, or even felt the need to. Everything fell into place, and things simply were the way they were.

Today, things were just a little more obvious than usual, as he and Sanzo stood side-by-side, a united front. Gojyo took a step forward to have his say. "Hey, Goddess." Gojyo got down on his knee in front of the shrine. "Look, we really just want you to tell our kids we..." He winced, as he felt a strange, pinching pain in his gut. "We love 'em. I love 'em like hell, and I miss 'em. We're pushing for the India border as fast as we can. We..." His other knee buckled, as he felt a strange pressure on his heart. "I want you to be strong. We'll be home soon." His voice cracked. "H-happy birthday, kids." Sanzo stared down at Gojyo curiously, as Gojyo fell to his palms, shaking.

"If you're going to be ill, could you do it elsewhere?"

"I can't move," Gojyo whispered. The pain in his gut had suddenly become more severe, and unpleasantly familiar. Sanzo got down next to him, and gripped his chin.

"What the hell is going on?" Gojyo tried to answer as Sanzo's lazy purple eyes bored into his red. No words came out, and Sanzo quickly turned around. "Hakkai." He spoke louder, and Hakkai looked up from his newspaper. His forehead creased, and he approached the pair. He knelt down next to Gojyo and put his index and middle finger over his wrist.

"Your heart is racing. Your skin is clammy. Come on." He wrapped an arm under Gojyo's shoulders and lifted him. Gojyo couldn't find the strength to lift himself, and could only let himself be dead weight against Hakkai. The trio rejoined Goku at the car, and Hakkai dumped Gojyo into the back seat.

"Have you ever heard of Delhi belly?" Goku asked with a wide grin. Gojyo took a few deep breaths, but he couldn't get enough oxygen. "We're almost in India, you must have it!"

"The fuck is a Delhi?" Gojyo finally managed to protest, as Hakkai put the jeep into gear and began to drive onward down the mountain. His heart still raced, his stomach still twisted, and he felt chills all down his body. Sanzo's fists were clenched on his knees, and he slowly turned around to glare down at Gojyo.

"You're not having a repeat of last year's incident, are you?"

"No, no way," Gojyo breathed weakly. He shook his head. "It's impossible."

"Fine." Sanzo turned back around, fixing his gaze on the road.

"I saw a town a few kilometers away, we should be able to find an apothecary there," Hakkai suggested in his usual chipper way. Gojyo said nothing, instead tilting his head back and turning to look at the shrine fading in the distance.

"Bye, guys," he muttered weakly. "Happy birthday."

"Absolutely nothing physically wrong with him," Hakkai sighed to himself as they exited the apothecary. Gojyo was leaned over Goku's shoulder now, still too weak to move under his own power. "At least nothing that he can tell." Sanzo was still visibly angry.

"We ought to find some sort of other option. Are there any other apothecaries in this town?" He glanced around at the dusty town that sat at the foot of the mountain. It was incredibly small, with only a few streets and byways, thatched huts for houses, and a two-room inn. It seemed terribly underdeveloped, considering the visible ruins of some considerable buildings they had passed only an hour prior.

"It's a small town," Hakkai shrugged.

"Have you found out how far the next town is?"

"Five days by horse, so probably three by jeep." Hakkai smiled slyly. "But not to worry, I know just the thing to cheer you up." He pulled a small white package out from inside his shirt.

"Did you... steal that?" Sanzo cocked his brow curiously.

"Would you have preferred I pay for it and explain why, exactly, four men, one of whom is ostensibly a man of the cloth, needed a pregnancy test?"

"Hmph." Sanzo said nothing, and Hakkai slipped the box back into his sash. Goku glanced up at Gojyo as he followed the two adults.

"You really think there's something wrong again?"

"No way. It's probably something I ate," Gojyo muttered.

Ten minutes later, they arrived at the inn and Hakkai dragged Gojyo to the outhouse. Five minutes later, the party gathered around the white stick, which had been precariously smuggled back into the inn's bedroom.

"How do you read these stupid things?" Goku whined.

"You know what these things are?" Hakkai furrowed his brow curiously.

"Well, no, but you all seem to be staring at it like you're reading it," Goku pointed out.

"It's the same way you read anything else- interpret the symbols." Hakkai pointed at the paper on the end of the stick. "See? Those two stripes mean 'no.' Goku, at this time, you will have no further little cousins." Sanzo and Gojyo both immediately reached into their respective pockets for cigarettes.

"See? I told you," Gojyo sighed, though his free hand absentmindedly rubbed his stomach. "It hurts like hell, but there's nothing in here that ain't supposed to be."

"Then what is wrong with you?" Hakkai wondered. "Do you mind if I read your chi? Perhaps there is some unusual ebb in its flow that may indicate an issue."

"Yeah, fine, whatever," Gojyo sighed. He popped his cigarette in his mouth and lazily flopped out one wrist, and Sanzo tossed the lighter at it. He lit his cigarette as Hakkai took hold of his wrist and focused for a moment. His brow furrowed, and Gojyo felt relaxed for a moment; his heart calmed, and he felt less dizzy. He took a deep drag off of his cigarette and looked to Hakkai to thank him, but stopped when he saw Hakkai's eyes wide open. Hakkai let go of Gojyo's hand, and then stared between his own in confusion.

"This is going to sound unusual, but I have found our problem." He looked at Gojyo, and his usual blithe smile crept back onto his face. "It is nothing within you. It's something else entirely. I can only describe it as part of your chi creeping off of you and moving elsewhere, as though it's being lured away."

"That's weird." Gojyo sat up.

"Ah, you're feeling better!" Hakkai smiled a bit brighter.

"Sure, yeah, thanks to you."

"No, no." Hakkai shook his head. "I didn't do anything." He sat upright suddenly. "Come on, come with me." He strode out of their room, breaking the test stick to splinters and discarding it into the wastebasket as he did. Sanzo followed him, and Goku and Gojyo followed suit. Gojyo was surprised that his legs suddenly worked again. Hakkai opened his satchel, and Hakuryu joined the party. "I know it's strange, but there's no time to argue. You can sense something wrong here too, right?" Hakuryu cooed, and became the jeep again. Hakkai jumped in, and didn't even leave enough time for everyone to put their seat belts on before putting the jeep into high gear and speeding back the way they'd come. Hakkai halfway turned to glance at Gojyo in the back seat. "Let me know when you start feeling sick again." He thought a moment, and didn't even turn back to add, "No- tell me when you feel as bad as you did before."

Almost as soon as they reached the town limits, Gojyo felt his head spin. He slumped down in the seat and tried to breathe the air in the car as much as he could, but the smell of the dust was still making him nauseous. As they passed the ruins again, he felt a huge weight on his chest, and managed to reach up and tap Hakkai on the shoulder. The jeep skidded to a halt in front of the ruins and Gojyo quickly pushed the door open to lean out. His stomach threw itself into his throat, and he heaved, but nothing came out. Hakkai patted Gojyo on the back as he continued to gag, as Sanzo got out himself and stared around.

The ruins sprawled a long way, with remnants of stone walls sticking out of the ground in patterns. The stones were smooth around the edges, crumbling away in places, and despite the age of the ruins, there was no plant life at all. Sanzo lit another cigarette as he walked forward.

"There's nothing here. Let's go."

"Something feels off about this place," Goku mumbled, looking unusually pensive.

"You're right. Gojyo, I can feel your chi being pulled off of you. There's something here taking it." Hakkai stood upright, and Gojyo looked up as well.

"It's weird. It feels familiar," he said, and Hakkai helped him to his feet.

"We passed here an hour ago. It's familiar enough for that," Sanzo grumbled. "We don't have time for this. If the air here is making him sick, why are we hanging around?"

"Call it curiosity," Hakkai shrugged.

"What if it happens again?" Gojyo rubbed his head. "What if something is following us and fucking with me? If there is, I want to deal with it here and now." He shivered hard and forced himself upright. He took a few shuddering steps forward. "Hey! Asshole! If you're here, come at me!" He glared around angrily, his face getting hot. "I'm in no mood to fuck around!" He stumbled and fell face-first, coughing as he hit the ground. Sanzo grabbed Gojyo by the elbow.

"You're clearly in no shape for this," he growled.

"Let me go," Gojyo snapped back, pressing his hand into the ground. "There's something here." He began to push back the thin, dry dirt and dust under his hands to find a sharp corner on something large, black, and solid. Against the plain white and gray rocks, it was very distinctly out-of-place, something that had been left there. Sanzo's eyes widened, and he got on his knees beside Gojyo to push the sand out of the way. Goku and Hakkai quickly joined them, and in a matter of minutes, they had uncovered what appeared to be an obsidian door. The text on it was as clean and easily legible as if it had been laid down only an hour before. Gojyo felt his heart pounding through his ribcage, ready to jump from his chest. "What the hell is this?"

"I'm not entirely sure," Hakkai remarked, running his fingers over it. "This language is entirely foreign to me." Gojyo curiously set his hand in the center of a large, empty circle engraved in the slate, and discovered that it was still perfectly smooth, as though polished.

"I may have seen something akin to this written in one of the older texts," Sanzo remarked softly. "An ancient form of a sealing spell." He began to trace some of the symbols with his fingers. "Yes. Most certainly. Something has been sealed here." He looked up to survey the ruins around them. "Surely, that was what demolished this place."

"Just how old do you think it is?" Hakkai wondered.

"I can't quite fathom it. I don't think anything like this has been used for a long time. But some of these symbols are still used in creating youkai limiters," Sanzo explained coolly. "That's probably what he's feeling. You and Goku already wear limiters, but since he has youkai blood, the presence of this tablet is weakening him. As I've been saying, let's leave."

"That ain't it," Gojyo muttered, as he tried to get up. He stumbled again, and realized he couldn't move his fingers from the circle on the slab. "What the f-"

"Hey!" Goku gasped when he saw that Gojyo was stuck. Gojyo cried out in surprise as his hand sunk into the solid stone.

"Pull him back!" Hakkai grabbed onto both of Gojyo's shoulders. Sanzo hooked his elbow around Gojyo's, and Goku grabbed onto Hakkai's shirt and Sanzo's robe. There was a terrible groaning noise emanating from the ground. Gojyo grabbed his quickly sinking right hand with his left, trying to pull himself back, but as the stone swallowed more of him, he was jerked forward. The groan turned into a roar, and the dust around them began to rise in a tornado and swallow them. Hakuryu cried out, turning into his dragon form and circling over them, whistling and chattering excitedly at Hakkai. Hakkai, Sanzo, and Goku tried to pull Gojyo out, but the stone was clearly pulling back as Gojyo's entire right arm and part of his left were pulled in. He looked back at Sanzo in a panic, but Sanzo's face was blank as usual. His nostrils flared, and Gojyo turned back around to the stone slab. It kept sucking him forward, finally grabbing onto his chest. Sanzo was now sinking into it as well.

"Let go of me!" Gojyo roared over the uproar.

"I can't," Sanzo replied, a cool anger infiltrating his usual monotone. "We will not get to India if you're stuck here."

"I'm telling you to leave me here!" Gojyo replied back, but it was too late. With a sound like a bellowing bull, the entire party was pulled into the void of the stone.

They were falling through a dusty grey sky that was not their own, and none of them could see the ground below them. Sanzo was still holding onto Gojyo's elbow, Hakkai tried to grab Goku's hand while still holding Gojyo's collar, and Goku clung onto Sanzo. "Stay together, everyone!" Hakkai called to the others, but the sound of the rushing wind was too much for the others to hear it.

Gojyo's arm slipped from Sanzo's grasp, and Sanzo gripped his wrist. "Don't let go of me," he yelled anxiously, as he tried to grab onto Sanzo. Sanzo said something in response, but Gojyo couldn't make it out. Instead, he shouted back, "I swear, if you let me go-" A terrible gust of wind burst from below, and Gojyo's shirt tore out of Hakkai's grasp. The jerk of Gojyo falling just a little faster was enough to loosen Sanzo's grasp on his wrist, and he fell away. Sanzo tried to grab at Gojyo again as the wind carried him off. Gojyo threw his arms out, desperately trying to grab back, but it was no use.

"Gojyo!" Both Hakkai and Goku cried out, and Sanzo could only stare, wide-eyed, as Gojyo vanished into the brown clouds.

"We'll find him. Whatever this place is, I'll turn it upside down before leaving without him," Sanzo growled. In the howling wind, his words and sentiment were lost. He simply tightened his grip on the two companions he had left as they plummeted towards the distant ground.

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Final Notes: Oh Gojyo, why do I love hurting you so much?

By the by, I did check. Delhi did exist back when the original "Journey to the West" was written. No word on whether or not "Delhi belly" did, but that's more of a euphemism for getting yourself sick off drinking foreign water.

I hope to update with new chapters weekly or biweekly, depending on how fast I can get this written.

Any thoughts? Review.

Any suggestions? Review.

Any critiques? Review!

Nothing to say? Review anyway!

Until next week!


	2. The Sealed Underworld

**King Rat, No Mercy**

Author's Notes: Woo! King Rat hasn't been forgotten! Okay, so, no delays here.

Disclaimer: Nothing is mine. Fair use, fan work, not profiting, etc. The situation and any characters not present in the original work are mine.

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**2: The Sealed Underworld**

The ground was cold and hard, with little give when he pushed his hands into it. He managed to push himself upright and stared around slowly. Night had fallen while he had been knocked out, and the skies were a dull, starless black. The moon was out, eerily red against the flat, desolate landscape. Wind whistled past his ears, sounding for all the world like a crying child and forming ripples in the dust. Gojyo ran his hands over his body from his head across his back and body. He looked upwards, but couldn't even fathom where he had fallen from. Everything that had happened before he'd woken up rushed back to him- the strange sealing stone, falling forever, losing his friends- and he groaned.

"How is my head not cracked like a watermelon?" He wondered aloud. He couldn't find any injuries on his body anywhere. He got to his feet, staring around uneasily. There was a small hut a few hundred meters away, some crooked fences and sparse fields of wheat, and a strange, sharp wind. He pulled his jacket tighter around his chest. His stomach still ached somewhat, but it was feeling better than it had been. He patted his pockets- thankfully, there were three full boxes of cigarettes stowed inside. He pulled one out and lit it; somehow, the smoke roused him enough to think straight. He couldn't see his friends anywhere, and there were no signs of life for miles around. He could only think of one option: start walking.

The hut nearest him was completely black inside. He peered inside the window, and saw things covered in dust, as though they had just been left and forgotten. There were a few weapons strewn across the floor, abandoned. He kept going, seeking anything at all that indicated some sort of intelligent presence. There were a few huts off the roadside as he traveled, but they were all the same. Some were in more disrepair than others, and in the fifth he found, he spotted a skeleton on the ground. After that, there was nothing breaking up the scenery until a wall became visible on the horizon. He picked up his speed, jogging to get closer to it. It turned out to be a low wall circling six huts, with a bonfire lighting the center. A few men were outside, either sitting on the ground and staring blankly at the fire, or talking in quiet groups. Gojyo sighed with relief- people!

"Hey!" He vaulted the wall and ran into the circle. One or two of the men looked at him, then continued staring into space. An older man with muscles like an ox emerged from the hut nearest him, and surveyed him up and down.

"You from around here?" He demanded gruffly. Gojyo shook his head.

"Where the hell am I, anyway?"

"You mean you don't know?" The ox-like man scowled. "Come in here for a minute." He left the door to his hut open, but Gojyo paused. His instinct was not to follow someone he didn't know somewhere secluded, but he also knew that he may not find any other offers for help. Besides that, he recognized that he was already at these people's mercy, as he was completely lost and alone. Giving up, he followed the man into his hut.

The large man took a bottle and two little carved cups off the shelf and poured Gojyo a cup of something yellowish that smelled strongly alcoholic. "You look like you could use this," he muttered. Gojyo drank it down willingly.

"Thanks." He coughed as the alcohol stung his throat. "Hell is this stuff?"

"It's sake, kind of. Rice doesn't grow well down here, and wheat does, so we cut what sake we can make with distilled grain alcohol. It's strong as shit. We don't need to eat down here, but we still need to get wasted just to keep a handle on our sanity," the ox-like man grumbled.

"You said 'down here.' You still haven't told me where we are," said Gojyo.

"Yeah, that's a long story." The man rubbed his head. "Long story short, most of the fellows here were in an army, but the soldiers of Heaven sealed us away. We've been down here for about five-hundred years, maybe a little more, but it's hard to keep track." He poured himself a shot and downed it quickly.

"You look pretty good for someone who's over five-hundred years old," Gojyo pointed out skeptically.

"Seems like our aging has slowed, so our imprisonment is elongated. About a day's worth of aging for each year we've been trapped. It's easiest to tell with the younger boys. The ones that are left." He sighed heavily, rubbing his closely-shaven head. "Nobody leaves, but every once in a while, someone gets sucked in. It's rare, but it happens. You're stuck here now too."

"What?" Gojyo pounded his fists on the table. "You mean we're trapped in this place for good?"

"What the hell did you think I meant when I said we were sealed?" The man poured himself and Gojyo another shot. "Like I said, you're gonna need this." They each downed it.

"I'll find a way out of here." Gojyo put his cup back down on the table. "I've got to. My buddies and I, we don't give up easy."

"You had buddies?" The ox-like man poured another shot for each of them.

"We got separated falling in. But I'll find them." Gojyo downed another shot. The ox-like man poured him another, as he contemplated him from across the table.

"Are they like us?"

"What do you mean?"

"Never mind," the man grumbled. "All you need to know is that you're lucky you are what you are. If your buddies aren't like us, they ain't gonna make it."

"What, is the air bad or something?" Gojyo frowned, and he took the next shot. The man quickly refilled his cup.

"No. The people." The man shook his head towards the window, indicating the men meandering around outside. "The fellas, they don't take too kindly to those who aren't of red blood."

"Red blood, huh?" Gojyo's frown deepened as he drank again. His frown faded, as his mind began to wander.

"Never did catch your name, stranger." The ox-like man filled his cup again, and Gojyo took the shot. He hissed as the alcohol burned his throat. His head had begun to spin.

"Sha Gojyo." The ox-like man was silent. He poured Gojyo another shot. "Thanks. You're a good host, my friend. Never did catch your name." He grinned stupidly as his face began to feel warm.

"You ain't gonna remember it in a couple hours." The man sat down as Gojyo took another shot.

"H-hey, why'd you stop drinking? I feel like a jerk drinking alone." He held the man's still-full cup out to him, his arm shaking and sloshing the liquid onto the table. The man simply smirked and shook his head.

"I need to be sober enough to haul you off to meet the King."

Gojyo laughed briefly, as all the alcohol suddenly went to his head. "Wh-what?" He laughed again. "You... you want to take me... where?" He laughed harder, his vision becoming blurry. The large man poured him another shot, but Gojyo knocked it over as he tried to grab it. His face felt like it was on fire, his chest suddenly heavy, and his knees completely limp. He tried to get up, but collapsed onto the ground. Everything was spinning, the dirt floor was a kaleidoscope, and his vision went black.

* * *

"Well, this sucks," Hakkai understated in a very matter-of-fact manner. He, Goku, and Sanzo had opened their eyes in the middle of a muddy rice paddy, staring skyward at gray clouds against a black sky. A cold, harsh wind made the rice stalks shake like frightened rabbits.

"They're doing it wrong," Sanzo muttered as he sat up and looked at the mud on his robes. "Not enough water."

"Man, this place even smells miserable," Goku griped. He was the first one to get to his feet, and began tromping through the fields to find solid ground. Hakkai and Sanzo followed, soon coming to a bank.

"Well, surely there must be some water around here for bathing," Hakkai mused idly as he began to strip his soiled clothes off. "There must be some sort of sluice for the paddy..."

"You're ignoring the problem," Sanzo grumbled as Hakkai trailed off. "We don't know where we are. My gun is loaded with only five bullets. Goku, do you have your staff?"

"I think I left it in the Jeep," Goku replied with an irritated grunt as he began to smear mud off the back of his pants. "But I still have my fists, so I'll be cool."

"Gojyo is unarmed as well, not to mention alone." Sanzo took his robe entirely off and began yanking things out of the sleeves. He folded the sutra into a small square, tucked his pistol and a small, stiff piece of paper into it, and stashed them in his back pants pocket. The holster of his gun hung on the edge of his pants.

"We don't even know where he is," Hakkai sighed, as he tried to wring some of the mud from his shirt. "I can only hope he's okay."

"I wouldn't worry about him!" said Goku. "He always gets out of things like this okay."

"Since when?" Sanzo cocked his brow.

"I can't think of any specifics, but he usually ends up okay at the end of things," Goku shrugged. "We all kinda do."

"Idiot." Sanzo whipped his harisen out of his other sleeve pocket and pitched it at Goku's head. Goku whined. Hakkai had wandered in another direction, and found a small hut. He waved the others over.

"There's a barrel of rainwater over here. It's not much, but it should get things clean enough. Sanzo, bring me the things that need the most cleaning. Goku, there's an empty crate here too, come help me break it up. I've still got a flint to start a fire with, and we can dry things once they're clean."

It took them perhaps twenty minutes to get their outerwear rinsed off, and Hakkai started a fire in a dry patch near some rocks. He laid the clothes out across the rocks, and the trio made themselves comfortable near the flickering flames. They were then quiet. In the firelight, the world around them looked even darker.

"What time is it, even?" Goku wondered after a few long minutes of silence.

"It's hard to tell. I'm guessing it's past midnight," Hakkai replied with a small shrug. They were quiet again.

"We should consider some sort of meal. Do you have any provisions on you?" Sanzo asked, looking to Hakkai.

"Unfortunately, no." Hakkai shrugged. "I filled my canteen in the barrel before we cleaned our clothes, but I have no food. We'll have to find food in the morning. I'm not all that hungry anyway."

They were quiet again. Goku suddenly looked up. "Me neither."

"Eh?" Hakkai frowned.

"I'm not hungry." Goku poked his stomach with both index fingers. "I don't feel full, but I don't feel empty. Like, if I had food, I'd want to eat it, but I don't really feel like eating."

"That is something I have literally never heard you say," Hakkai remarked, wide-eyed.

"If none of us are hungry, then I see no need to worry about food," Sanzo concluded, folding his hands. The night was silent again. The wind picked up and howled past them like a wounded dog.

"Do you know where we are?" Goku looked to Hakkai.

"Some sort of sealed realm," Sanzo muttered, and he lit up a cigarette and lay back on the dry grass. Hakkai leaned forward to look at him.

"You mean you know what this place is?"

"No. But I can make a few assumptions." Sanzo took a very long drag on his cigarette and breathed it out through his nose. "Based on that tablet, this place is what became of whatever those ruins once were. Judging by the information on the tablet, I am comfortable in assuming that whatever was there was essentially pulled here. Also judging on my lack of familiarity with the symbols, it's at least a century old, perhaps more. This place has existed since then." He paused to inhale smoke again.

"And how is that going to change our situation?" Hakkai asked. Goku suddenly sat up, looking around.

"I wasn't finished." Sanzo glowered at Hakkai, but then loosely gestured skyward. Goku seemed to calm again, though his eyes roved the grass around them. "Since we can see our moon, I know it is somehow connected to the world we know, but since the moon is full here and, if memory serves, it was but a quarter waning last I saw it, it is nowhere near where we once were. Finally, I can tell you that whoever placed the seal placed it incorrectly, because we were still able to pass through it. I can surmise, based on these facts, that we have fallen into some sort of sealed realm connected to our world."

"I reiterate my previous question," said Hakkai.

"I can also conclude that, if we can get in, there must be some way out." The grass around them rustled, though the wind had stopped, and Hakkai and Goku both seemed to perk up.

"You can come out now," Hakkai called aloud. "We know you're there." The grass was silent again, until men began to spill out of it. There were at least ten of them, perhaps more behind them, and all were armed with maces, spears, and broadswords. The grass was still again, though the night air suddenly smelled of sweat, alcohol, and metal.

"Where the hell did you guys come from?" One of them snarled. They were slowly circling the group, staggering their paces so the trio couldn't keep track of their numbers. The firelight reflected off of their crimson eyes, glinting like rubies in their sockets.

"Up," Hakkai replied vaguely, glancing around. Sanzo began digging through his pockets, and Goku jumped to his feet.

"Yeah, like we thought," another grumbled.

"Ain't been any outsiders here in a while," one muttered. "Knew there weren't none holed up around here, you must've just fallen in." Another one of them licked their lips.

"These guys are creepin' me out," said Goku anxiously.

"There's something very strange about them," Hakkai noted to himself.

"We can hear you, asshole," one of the bigger ones snarled.

"Do you think we can handle all of them?" Goku wondered.

"We've dealt with bigger crowds," Sanzo stated coolly.

"There's something different about these. They're not like the crowds of Minus-Wave afflicted youkai we've been dealing with. Usually, our unruly mobs are, well, more unruly." Hakkai glanced around at the men surrounding them. "These are just a bit tipsy."

"Quit ignoring us! Let's show 'em how red our blood is!" Their apparent leader leaped at Hakkai, his broadsword raised, and Hakkai crossed his arms across his chest, ready to put up a chi shield. Nothing happened. Hakkai's eyes were wide open.

"It's not working."

"Get back!" A clear, young man's voice shouted from behind them, and before the man could land his blow, someone was between Hakkai and the aggressor. A person at Goku's height, wearing a canvas cloak over his head and back, had jumped in and landed in front of him with an iron spear in hand. He threw the attacker backwards. The addition of a fourth fighter on the party's side was enough to cause the rest of the crowd to rush in towards them, weapons flailing. The Sanzo party (and guest) began deflecting them as best as they voice.

"I'm all hands tonight," Hakkai joked as a man with a mace ran towards him, swinging it wildly. He thrust his fingertips into the man's throat, then punched him across the face. Goku bashed two heads together and pushed the attached bodies down to get behind three others. He managed to snatch a staff from one of them and cracked all three of them across the heads. The cloaked boy used his spear to deflect attacks as well, never using the tip but whacking them in the gut and on the head to back them off. Sanzo used his gun as a shield, tossing off attacks. He thrust his heel into the crotch of the nearest one, and then pointed his gun at the next.

"What is that hunk of metal going to do to me?" The warrior growled. Sanzo narrowed his eyes, put the barrel into the man's shoulder and pulled the trigger. The man screamed wretchedly: "IT BURNS!" The sound of the man's screaming was enough to get the others' attention. The man's arm was just on the right side of detachment, limp at his side and pouring blood. Sanzo pointed his gun at the next nearest attacker.

"Who else would like to find out what a gun is?" He asked icily.

The remaining conscious assailants quickly picked up their fallen comrades and vanished back into the underbrush. Sanzo sank back to the ground and sighed heavily. "Down to four bullets."

"You'd better be careful how you use them," Goku suggested as he curled back up in place, examining his arms and legs for bruises. The boy in the cloak checked himself once over as well, and fixed his shifted hood on his head.

"They'll be back, and they'll bring friends. Extinguish your fire, find shelter, and lay low." He strapped his spear across his back and turned the opposite direction of the retreating attackers' path.

"We must thank you," Hakkai said with an affectionate smile. "You didn't have to help us."

"Oh!" The boy faced Hakkai with a big, bright smile that illuminated all of his visible features. "No, really, I don't mind. I was headed this way as it is. Anything for outsiders." He turned away again, pulling a map out of his pants pocket and unfolding it.

"Outsiders?" Goku looked up.

"Anyone who's not in the King's army, who never was," the boy explained.

"The King?"

"The guy in charge here," the boy chuckled. "You guys must not know anything!"

"You'll have to excuse us for that: we are strangers, in a strange land, and we only just arrived by strange means, but nonetheless." Hakkai opened his arms in a welcoming gesture. "Won't you stay and rest, just to catch your breath? We at least should know the name of the one who helped us."

"It's of no consequence." He shrugged his shoulders, not looking up from his map. "I really should be going."

"Where are you going?" The boy seemed to have no response to Hakkai's query. He finally turned to face Hakkai, and the firelight caught his eyes under the hood.

"I shouldn't stay here. That's all it is."

"At least stay long enough for us to look at your goddamn map," Sanzo growled. The boy's lips turned downwards, and he gave Sanzo a harsh glare.

"A man in priest's robes shouldn't talk that way."

"And what would you know of that?" Sanzo demanded.

"Because I am a soldier of Heaven, and-" The boy stopped, jaw agape, as Hakkai and Sanzo both stared at him, Hakkai with interest, and Sanzo with distaste.

"Really? And what would a soldier of Heaven be doing in a place like this?" Hakkai's eyes glinted with curiosity, and the boy froze in place.

"I suppose..." The boy smiled again, this time without showing his teeth. "I have some explaining to do."

* * *

End Notes: Oho, and the intrigue continues!

Alright guys, you know the drill. Give me something to talk about, ask me your questions, or insult my family!

Questions? Review!

Critique? Review!

Anything? Review!

Nothing? Review!

Until next week!


	3. The King

**King Rat, No Mercy**

Author Notes: I'm so excited for this chapter! I'm starting to find that my stories start really getting into motion around chapter 3. I guess I tend to build up the first two chapters slowly? I hope this isn't a bad habit.

This chapter is the first instance of a "suggested track" in this story. In case you have not read my previous stories, that just means "listen to the suggested song while reading that particular scene with which it's listed." It's only a suggestion; I kind of look at it like the soundtrack to a movie.

Disclaimer: Most of it still isn't mine, and I'm not profiting off of any of it.

* * *

**3: The King**

"Won't you be kind enough to fill us in?" Hakkai started, in his usual pleasant way. Sanzo, Goku, Hakkai, and the boy in the cloak had taken seats around the fire, with Sanzo facing the boy and Hakkai and Goku on his right and left sides, respectively. He had unloaded his spear in front of him, but seemed to have no other gear.

"I suppose that would be the right thing to do," he shrugged. He used his spear to stoke the fire, causing little yellow sparks to flicker skyward. "This place is a sealed part of the underworld; you know, where folks go where they die."

"I suppose that explains why my chi manipulation doesn't work," Hakkai mused. "Chi is probably subdued here on account of a lack of life force."

"Is that what you were trying to do?" The boy looked to Hakkai, eyes alight. "That's amazing! I've only ever heard of such things- you'll have to try and show me-" Hakkai noticed something, and he seemed to noticed that he had. He lowered his hood over his eyes, cleared his throat, and his voice dropped to a lower, calmer pitch. "Right. But the underworld isn't entirely dead, in and of itself. If it does work, then it's not going to work well."

"We already determined that we were sealed somewhere," Sanzo muttered.

"Right, you saw the tablet, didn't you?" The boy looked directly at Sanzo, who nodded. "Right. That seal was placed about five hundred and six years ago. It was designed to seal off the King and his army somewhere they couldn't do any damage. It was placed wrong, though, so the occasional traveler or merchant will end up falling in. Unfortunately, the guys here lack compassion for outsiders like yourselves." He shook his head. "Unless you intend to go around and kill the old soldiers- every last one- you will continue to be ambushed, and you will inevitably falter and be killed. It happens every time. Nobody has ever found a way out."

"How enlightening," Hakkai giggled.

"How encouraging," Sanzo grumbled, and he lit up a cigarette.

"So, are we to assume you're one of this King's soldiers as well?" Hakkai asked.

"No, but I pass for one."

"What do you mean?" Goku asked.

"I did notice something about our assailants," Hakkai mentioned, his smile brightening. "It was hard to tell in the dark, but I'm all but certain they were all hanyou."

"What?!" Goku looked to Hakkai in shock.

"It's true." The boy finally pulled his hood away, revealing short, crimson hair swept around his head in a dozen cowlicks. He was handsome for a boy who was clearly no more than fifteen, with a rather square jawline and little dimples around his mouth. The firelight illuminated his deep red irises.

"Ah. And so you are, too," Hakkai chirped. "That's what I'd thought."

"Say what you will. I've heard it all before." The boy began to readjust his hood.

"You're just like Gojyo!" Goku grinned. The boy stopped, frozen in place.

"Ah, that's right. I suppose Gojyo was tormented, too," Hakkai sighed absentmindedly. The boy was clearly surprised at Hakkai and Goku's blasé reactions, and glanced to Sanzo.

"You don't think I'm a freak."

"We don't know you yet." Sanzo didn't return the boy's critical stare, instead continuing to smoke his cigarette and staring into the fire. "As far as we know, you're a blank slate. The color of your hair and eyes has nothing to do with that."

"That's..." The boy bowed his head, clearly humbled. "That's something I don't hear much." His bright, wide smile spread across his cheeks. "It used to be, the only one who didn't torment me was my brother."

"Oh, you have a brother?" Goku smiled eagerly. "Is he your big brother, or little brother? What's his name?"

"Don't overwhelm him," Sanzo warned. The boy's cheeks had turned pink.

"Ahm, he's my big brother. Kind of. We're twins, but he's about ten minutes older. He still insists I'm his baby brother, though." He paused. "And his name's Ryuji." He paused again. "And mine's Aka."

"Twins, eh?" Hakkai's gaze briefly flitted to Sanzo, before focusing on Aka. "You must have a special bond. Where is your big brother?"

Aka was quiet for a few moments, staring down at his folded hands in his lap. "He's... he's been locked up for the past ten months. In the King's dungeon. I'm not really sure why, either."

"Man, this King guy must be a jerk!" Goku pouted.

"I'm sorry." Hakkai reached to touch Aka's shoulder, but he ducked to avoid his touch.

"It's okay, really. I'm alright, I don't miss him that much." Hakkai pulled his hand back, frowning, as Goku pulled his knees in and scowled at the fire.

"Aka's an unusual name," Sanzo noted, breaking the silence.

"We were left at a monastery at birth," Aka explained brusquely. "The monks named him Ryuji because it's a strong name. They named me Aka, because it suits me." He rubbed the back of his head.

"I appreciate your honesty." Hakkai smiled. "So, I must ask- since according to you we're doomed anyway, why would you bother to help us?"

"Like I said, anything for outsiders. You looked like you needed my help. If you don't need me anymore, I'll be on my way." Aka rose to his feet, but Sanzo grabbed his sleeve.

"You have a map. I want to see it."

"Oh. Right." Aka reached into his cloak and pulled out the map. He unfolded it on his lap, and Hakkai, Sanzo, and Goku gathered behind him. It was plain in feature, clearly drawn out by an amateur's hand. "My brother made this. It covers the known territory of the King and his soldiers. There's more there than we've drawn, but it's empty, as far as we can tell. This is about where we are." He pointed to a field illustrated in the southeast quadrant. "The King's castle is up here." He pointed to a structure drawn in the northwest quadrant. "There are a few villages, but homes are mostly scattered around the waste, especially near the fields. There's one major river, but it's nearly dry right now. It rains very rarely. The only other thing of note is the graveyards. Quite a few of those. Other than that, it's pretty empty terrain."

"If we were trying to leave, where would we begin?" Hakkai wondered.

"I wouldn't know." Aka shook his head. "If I did, I'd be there."

"Very curious." Hakkai rubbed his chin. Aka eyed him warily.

"You know, strangers, you haven't introduced yourselves."

"Ah. My apologies. I'm Cho Hakkai. These are Son Goku, and Genjo Sanzo, the 31st of China."

"Ah!" Aka's eyes widened at he stared at Sanzo. "You're a High Priest?" Sanzo said nothing, as Aka's eyes brightened. "You don't look or act like one- but you do have the sacred mark-" He tapped his own forehead as example. "And you have that thing that burns arms to shreds-"

"It's called a gun. It's used both for banishing ill spirits and taming wild monkeys. Observe." He pointed the gun at Goku, who flinched.

"It doesn't seem like something a priest should have. None of the priests I knew carried weapons like that," Aka observed. Sanzo put his gun away.

"The priests you knew are not on the same mission as we are."

"I see." Aka nodded. "But you're still a Sanzo. Do you... do you have a sutra? I was told Sanzos carried sutras."

"I do, of course," Sanzo affirmed reticently. Aka thought for a moment.

"You said you had a hanyou friend?"

"Yes, Sha Gojyo," Hakkai confirmed. Aka rubbed his chin.

"I feel like I've heard of something like this before." He was quiet, clearly thinking again.

"Did you see him?" Goku asked. "He got split from us. We don't know where he is."

"No, I haven't seen any new faces. But he's probably safe. Only hanyou are welcome here, and if he is one, he'll be accepted."

"Most curious," Hakkai said to himself.

"I... I want to help you." Aka finally looked up again, smiling his small, subdued smile. "I know a man, a very powerful magician. When he hears that you're a Sanzo, he'll surely be willing to help you."

"And what of our fourth?" Sanzo inquired testily.

"Surely we can look for him along the way. We could even ask the magician to seek him out for you."

"How did this magician get here?" Hakkai studied Aka's face.

"He used to work for the King."

"Ah. And if he is so powerful, why hasn't he left yet?"

"He can't, not yet. He's still studying how." Aka shuffled his feet. "Last I spoke to him, he said something about needing a source of holy power."

"You mean, like a sutra." Hakkai smiled knowingly. "Perhaps you're suggesting the magician will accept our help in exchange for his." He rested his chin in his palm and leaned towards Aka. "And, what is your price?"

"M-my price?" Aka's cheeks turned pink. "Well- I- uh-"

"Oh! I know!" Goku interrupted excitedly. "How about we help him save his brother? Then, we can take them out of here with us!"

"Oh, no, you don't have to," Aka protested. "I'm a servant of the Goddess, I can't accept any reward-" he stopped himself and lowered his eyes. "Though if you would, I would be most grateful."

"We'll do it, then," Hakkai assured him, patting his shoulder. Sanzo nodded in agreement, and Aka hunched his shoulders shyly.

"Thank you," he whispered. He shivered, and looked back up with a wide, bright smile. "You guys should probably get some sleep. I'll be able to get our bearings when its light. I'll keep watch through the night."

"Wow, that's nice of you!" Goku chirped. Aka nodded, and Sanzo extinguished the fire by turning the logs over into the dust. "Don't you need to sleep?"

"No, I'm fine." Aka smiled at Goku, and perched himself atop the rock the clothes had been laid out on. Goku shrugged, and piled his now-dry poncho into a lumpy pillow. Sanzo and Hakkai spread out their clothes onto the thin grass and laid down. Sanzo lit one last cigarette for the night, smoking it slowly and rolling the smoke in his cheeks.

"Ne, Aka, you said you were a soldier of Heaven, right? You said you weren't in the King's army, right?" Goku turned his head towards Aka. Aka nodded. "So, what are you doing here?"

"It's a long story."

"I like bedtime stories." Goku folded his hands behind his head.

"Don't be silly, aren't you a little old for that?" Aka grinned. His smile faded from his cheeks, as his gaze turned out towards the empty fields. "You might have guessed, but I was one of the soldiers of Heaven sent down to stop King Rat's army, and one of the two charged with sealing him. I was the one who messed it up. It's my fault you're- we're- down here." He put his head in his hands, despondent. Hakkai and Sanzo felt their souls shake as well, but for different reasons.

"King Rat?" Sanzo repeated, his brow furrowing. His neglected cigarette flickered out as another icy wind blew past.

"That's what he called himself," Aka replied, his somber voice muffled in the dry, stifling night air. "The King of the Downtrodden. King Rat."

* * *

**(Suggested Track: "Comfort Eagle," Cake)**

"-the fuck off'a me!" These words were the first herald of a new face in the courtyard, as Gojyo was dragged in. Gojyo had awoken to a painfully bright white sun, and felt himself being grabbed by two men. His head was pounding. He looked behind him to see the ox-like man from the night before walking off with a satchel clinking with bottles, and everything quickly came back to him. He realized he was being held by two armored soldiers, being dragged through a high-walled courtyard towards a large, square stone fortress with a red pagoda-style roof. His legs were in shackles, and he struggled as he felt them clasp his arms into manacles. They dragged him into the building by his elbows, but he kept pulling back. "I don't know where the fuck you're taking me, but I sure as hell don't want to go!" He struggled against the chains as they hauled him through the main room past more soldiers in regalia. "Let go of me, you bastards!" The guards finally obliged and threw him onto the floor, flat on his face. Some of the soldiers laughed, but someone began to applaud slowly.

"Bravo." This voice was loud, firm, though rather high in pitch, and had a distinct presence to it, and it was enough to quickly silence the riffraff. "What a display. What a fantastic show!" He stopped clapping, and Gojyo looked up to size up the speaker coming down from the raised dais at the back of the room. He was a tall, lean man with high cheekbones, long sleek red hair tied in a neat ponytail at the nape of his neck, and thin lips. He wore an ornate red robe. He had a notably regal look to his face, as he sneered down at him. Even more, there was something eerie about his very presence, that made the hair on Gojyo's arms and neck stand on end- it was like he was charged with static electricity. "As if I don't see enough classless braggarts on a daily basis. I would have thought someone as special as you would carry yourself with a bit more dignity." Gojyo's upper lip curled as he looked the man over, but the man opened his arms to Gojyo with a sly smile. "Sha Gojyo, welcome to my domain."

"Who the hell are you, and how the hell do you know who I am?" Gojyo snarled. The man laughed, and it gave him chills.

"Temper, temper! I will happily answer all of your questions." He smiled, his reedy voice rising and falling sycophantically like a mother soothing a child. It only unnerved Gojyo. "Now, the second question is best answered first. I sought you out, with my myriad sorcerers and seers. We have eyes to the outside world." He smiled a hollow, thin smile. "As for your first question, you may call me Nezuoh." He bowed at the waist. "I have long awaited your arrival."

"Nezuoh... King Rat?" Gojyo frowned. He felt his insides twist into knots- he'd heard that particular phrase before, and out of his own mouth.

"King Rat is my formal name, yes," Nezuoh's lips were upturned so high that they were nearly distorting his eyes. "But you may call me by my birth name."

Gojyo couldn't get the term out of his mind. "King Rat... what do you want from me?"

"You, my dear friend. Only you." Nezuoh spread his arms in a wide gesture to the surrounding soldiers. "Look around you. What do you see?" Gojyo narrowed his eyes distrustfully, but glanced around the room. He noticed something unusual about all of the men there, with their crimson hair tied in braids, cut short, or nearly shaved off.

"Everyone..." He looked back to Nezuoh, and caught a good look at his blood-red eyes glinting in the yellow light filtering in through the high windows. "Everyone here's a hanyou."

"My whole army, yes." Nezuoh smiled proudly, holding his head high. "Four thousand men strong- at least, we once numbered so. My beloved soldiers, my poor, mutinous children." He folded his hands over his heart. "Sad though it is to say, I have lost three thousand of my men to suicide and rebellion. And in a place like this, their souls cannot even ascend to Heaven!" He laughed bitterly. "We asked so precious little of them, and now we cannot even ask for higher favor in the next life. Even Heaven has rejected us! A pity."

"Exactly what the hell did you do to Heaven?" Gojyo asked suspiciously, following Nezuoh's even paces with his eyes even over his shoulder.

"We rebelled against Heaven in seeking better for all of our kind. It's sad, but true; we were halted before we even came close to Heaven's seat." He shrugged his shoulders. "But Heaven shall be ours. It is all foregone." His voice had begun to quiet and deepen, his timbre darker, his tone more serious. "We are the superior breed, you realize. The strength of youkai, the hearts of men, and the wisdom of those who look at the world from underfoot." He clenched his fists, his eyes suddenly dark. "The gods understand not the needs of those fated by birth to suffer!" Gojyo felt Nezuoh's presence grow hotter as his cheeks flushed as red as his hair. "How can they rule when they cannot appreciate those they make to feel pain! Damned celestials, in their gardens and paradises! We deserve better than this! After the oppression and disadvantage we have suffered-"

"Sir," one of his nearby guards quietly interrupted.

"Ah!" Nezuoh's face blanched, and he unclenched his fists. He took a calming breath and laughed an anxious, high-pitched laugh. "Sorry, sorry; my blood does run hot." Gojyo shuddered, trying to edge back from Nezuoh, but he began to pace around him. "But all that aside, we must rebuild. We're soon to leave this place, and if I'm to continue towards Heaven, I must have my army back. Unfortunately, we're at a slight disadvantage." He toyed with Gojyo's hair as he passed behind him, and Gojyo felt his skin crawl.

"What's your 'disadvantage'?" Gojyo said, knowing he was waiting for him to query.

"Children." Gojyo felt his stomach turn. "Armies, you see, are built on young blood, on children, but we have none. We have no women amongst us, and hanyou cannot bear children. Except..." Gojyo felt a hundred hot eyes bearing down on his neck, and he felt a wave of nausea.

"No. No, no. You don't get it, that wasn't anything I did. That was Kanzeon Bosatsu being a bitch to me, I never asked for that, I never wanted that!" Some of the gallery had begun to laugh softly, but Nezuoh smiled triumphantly.

"So you admit it." He laughed. "It's just like I saw. You had a child. No, you had children. Don't take me wrong, my friends!" He stood behind Gojyo, turning towards those gathered. "This is the one who conceived and carried two children in his own body! Like a woman." Gojyo gritted his teeth and turned to yell at Nezuoh, but Nezuoh faced him and grabbed his chin, and put his face uncomfortably close to Gojyo's. "And it suits you, for you do have such a lovely face." He grinned madly, coming so close their noses almost touched. He began to whisper to Gojyo in an eerie hiss: "Yohei. Eiji. I have sung praises for those names in my nightly prayers since I first heard them. They are famous here. Your darling little twins are the first to boast a hanyou father. Why should they be the last?" He spoke louder. "Sha Gojyo, I am asking you to be the mother of my army!"

Gojyo started to say, "Hell n-" but was halted when Nezuoh grabbed his chin and looked him in the eye.

"And remember, boy, I am King of this place. My word is law."

"No." Gojyo shook his head hard, pulling back from Nezuoh. "No! Hell no!" He clenched his fists behind his back. "Don't you get it? If you watched me, then you know how I fucking suffered! Kanzeon Bosatsu ripped my guts to shreds and tore a hole through me, for no goddamn good reason! I can't do it again. Don't you get it?" He began to shake, as he felt his gut throbbing painfully under his skin. "I goddamn fucking can't!"He finally managed to get his ankles under him and pushed himself to his feet, but suddenly felt weak. Nezuoh was glowering down at him, and his presence was suddenly toxic. Gojyo's knees wobbled, and he sank back down to his knees.

"You are a bold one, aren't you?" Nezuoh snarled. "But it's too late. I've made up my mind, and you'll find I'm quite convincing." A dark smirk spread across his cheeks. "Listen well, boy:

"I am King Rat, and all hanyou call me lord.

I am only just this side of a god.

I am a master of many dangerous arts.

And I will have my army from you, by will or by choice."

"Fuck you, man," Gojyo growled, his balled fists shaking at his sides. "I'll slit my goddamn throat before I go through that shit again."

"So be it!" King Rat cast one arm out, and two of his armored guards came forward. "Lock him up until he changes his mind." The guards grabbed Gojyo by the elbows, and though he thrashed against them, he couldn't get his arm loose for more than a second. Nezuoh smirked a little wider as they pulled him past. "Why don't you tell your sons how much you loathe them?"

"Fuck you!" Gojyo snapped, lunging at Nezuoh. "Fuck your shit! Fuck your rotten face!" The guards pulled harder, yanking him towards a door behind him, but Gojyo wouldn't calm himself down. "Fuck you! You know nothing about my sons! Nothing!"

He screamed insults and swears the whole way out, as King Rat and his gallery laughed him off.

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End Notes: So, who is King Rat, anyway? And what is he going to do? We'll find out!

I welcome all criticism, or even if you just tell me what your favorite part was!

Questions? Review!

Concerns? Review!

Loved it? Review!

Hated it? Review and tell me why!

Until next week, everyone!


	4. Those Who Should Not Have Met

**King Rat, No Mercy**

**Author's Notes**: Yes! Interest increases with the introduction of an antagonist! I must make note of this...

I will warn everyone now- and probably should have before- as tame as this story has been up until this point for me to give it an M rating, this story has not been rated M exclusively for sexual content. I consider this story fairly disturbing, and though it may not be right now, it will get worse. If nothing else, prepare yourself.

In response to RodiSquall: ACK! Thanks for pointing those out! I feel like such an idiot! The mistake with Aka's name probably happened when I moved some dialogue around, but I have no excuse for the his/how mistake except that I am the suck. I went back and fixed the errors as soon as I saw your review. I hope you continue to enjoy the story!

D-chan: Kanzeon Bosatsu, lie to the Sanzo party? No way, she's a goddess. She might bend the truth, but she would never outright lie. As for your first question? Aka mentioned they'd been trapped in the underworld for 506 years, and Yohei and Eiji have only been around for one. How could they possibly be the same? Hm. Read on and we'll all find out!

By the by, since she will be referred to several times: I recognize that Kanzeon Bosatsu is technically hermaphroditic as depicted in the manga, but she is referred to as a goddess, and as far as I have seen, with feminine pronouns. As such, I will be doing the same.

Finally! This chapter marks the introduction of what I'm considering an "arc" suggested song. "The Tain" is a 15-minute epic, a rock-opera style interpretation of _Tain bo Cuchulainn_. The milieu of the song is going to fit nicely with five separate scenes, as the song is divided into five parts. Long story short, you can look up the individual parts or the full song on Youtube, or the band's official Youtube account has the music video up should you wish to listen to the part of the song assigned to those scenes. I will be include the approximate durations of each individual part, though they are sonically different, for your benefit. Besides that, it's a damn good song.

Without any further ado!

**Disclaimer:** If you don't remember it from the manga, or if you do not see someone else's name written on it, it's mine. Otherwise, it's not mine. I profit from nothing.

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**4: Those Who Should Not Have Met**

Aka had started the day atop a rock, studying the landscape and the shadows. Now that it was light, Sanzo could see that the place they had landed in was just as desolate as Aka had described. The skies were pale yellow like jaundiced skin, cloudless and dry. The rice in the paddy was half-wilted, and the grass around them was brown. The dirt stretched across a maddening expanse, further than the eye could see, and deep cracks had formed in the dry ground. Hakkai watched Aka like a hawk as he compared the vista to his map, and finally decided on a bearing.

"We should be able to make good time," Aka said aloud, jumping down from the rock and tying his spear onto his back. "It's flat, easy terrain. Should be about four days of travel, unless we hit trouble."

"Shall we get moving, then?" Hakkai smiled. "After all, you said there would be more trouble if we stayed."

"Aren't they just going to attack us if they see us?" Goku asked, looking up from playing in the dry dirt.

"More than likely," Aka shrugged. "But it can't be helped."

"Should we perhaps travel by night, then?" Hakkai suggested. "I do have a compass."

"What is a compass?" Aka frowned, and Hakkai pulled a compass out of his satchel.

"It's a convenient device that shows which direction it's facing based on the magnetic poles." He tapped the outside of it. "We've been consistently traveling west as much as possible, so we've only ever asked it to point us in one direction, but... hmph." He shook the compass, a small frown creasing his forehead. The needle refused to turn no matter which way he moved it. "It's not working."

"There must be no magnetic poles here," Sanzo grumbled, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Have you tried to make a star map, for triangulation?" Hakkai asked, though he still stubbornly tapped the edge of the compass. Aka shook his head.

"The sun and the moon go in constant paths, but the stars are always in different spots. Try as we might, we could never make any sense of it." He lowered his eyes."Sorry, guys. I can only go by the angle of the sun, so we're going to have to move when its light." Aka took a few steps forward, before turning back to them with a small smile. "The upside is, usually they're all hung over this early in the morning. And if we take a path around the major villages, we should be able to avoid them during combat practices. Around sundown, they start getting drunk again, and we'll want to be hidden by then."

"We should probably get moving, then," Hakkai agreed, and he tucked the compass away. Aka led the way, and the party tromped off into the wastelands.

The terrain was as boring as it appeared, flat and almost featureless. The occasional tree dotted the landscape, bare of leaves, roots gnarled and branches bent like they were arthritic. Hakkai silently wished that Hakuryu were there; he had begun to remember how much he had taken him for granted. Their trips across dry deserts were much faster with the Jeep to hurry them along. It was a very long trip for someone with nothing to talk about. Goku walked alongside Aka, Sanzo in the middle, and Hakkai took up the rear. Sanzo had left his robe loose around his waist, perhaps to help keep himself ventilated in the ruddy sun's heat. Every hour or so, Hakkai spotted him digging in the folds of his robe and in the pockets he could reach- perhaps, he imagined, trying desperately to find a few more bullets. He noticed a thick piece of paper folded in the crease where the robe tied, and whenever Sanzo's hand encountered it, he would take it, open it to examine its contents, and fold it back up and tuck it away. It was an odd ritual, Hakkai thought to himself, "but perhaps he keeps forgetting it's there, whatever it may be." As the sun passed overhead, its incarnadine light painting the day into the afternoon, Hakkai found his thoughts swirling around his head and nagging at his earlobes. Goku was trying to keep up conversation with Aka.

"Ne, Aka, that's such a cool spear. Where did you get it? Did you get it in Heaven?"

"No, I got it here. One of the guys around here dropped it. I wasn't given a pointed weapon in Heaven."

"Why not?"

"Well, Heaven's soldiers aren't supposed to kill. I suppose they figure younger soldiers can't be allowed to make that mistake with a weapon that can slice or pierce." He was quiet, but Goku simply grinned and continued.

"I have a weapon too! It's called a Nyoibo. It can stretch really long, and it doesn't have a point either! It's still awesome."

"Oh, a staff, eh? I use a chang-gun staff myself." Aka let his small smile show.

"A chain-gun staff? I thought you didn't know what a gun was!" Goku nudged Aka's shoulder, grinning brightly.

"No, no, chang-gun, the long form of a gun staff. It's about half of a meter taller than I am." Aka giggled, and Goku laughed too.

"What about your big bro? What does he use?"

"He's not my big brother, we're twins." Aka gently cuffed Goku atop the head. "And he uses a glaive, y'know, a big guan dao. He was always more skilled in combat than I was, so they were willing to give him a blade."

"Your brother is stronger than you? But I saw you fighting! You were really good, and fast!"

"Well, we have been down here for more than five hundred years; we've had nothing much to do but practice." Aka looked away, into the distant horizon. A few huts were appearing in front of them, only just visible through the dust blowing in the wind, and he began to divert their course slightly to the east. "So, we practiced. Day in, day out. The King's soldiers drank their beer and awful sake, declaring that this would be their kingdom, but we practiced for the day that we would leave. We fought each other for hours on end." He chuckled bitterly. "It's almost unfair to say we fought. He beat me into the dirt every time."

"Aw, man," Goku groaned. "Why did we have to get the weak brother?" Aka lightly slapped Goku's head again.

"I could abandon you, you know."

"No, don't do that!" Goku whined, grabbing Aka's arm and clinging on. "I was kidding!"

"I know." Aka grinned his larger grin, bright and pleasant, and chuckled as he tried to pry Goku off. Hakkai had been carefully observing Aka's face, and had taken note of both of his smiles. The two were distinct: one was small, subdued, and often sarcastic, and the other spread across his cheeks to his chin and illuminated his eyes. He picked up his pace a bit to catch up with Sanzo.

"Does something strike you as odd about that boy?" Sanzo, who had been in the midst of his pocket-digging ritual, shoved the piece of paper in his hands into the folds of the robe tied around his waist. He glanced at Aka, then back at Hakkai and offered a slight nod. "Have you put your finger on just what it is, or is it merely bad premonition?"

"I can't put my finger on it." Sanzo shook his head. Hakkai noticed the piece of paper flutter down from Sanzo's waist.

"I suppose you've been preoccupied." He crouched to pick the paper up, but stopped when Sanzo grabbed his wrist. Hakkai offered the paper back to Sanzo. "We shouldn't litter." Sanzo swiped the folded paper from Hakkai's hand. "Tell me, are you worried about him?"

"Which him?" Sanzo raised one skeptical eyebrow. Hakkai simply smiled. "No. I'm not."

"Are you lying?" Sanzo grunted and turned away. Hakkai continued to follow, but this time two paces behind him. "I've told you before; it's not a crime to care-"

"I don't want to have this conversation," Sanzo stated, his voice devoid of emotion. Hakkai said nothing in response. They were approaching the village, and Aka halted and turned back towards them. He waved them closer. Hakkai and Sanzo caught up with the two younger boys, and Aka crouched down.

"Listen," Aka whispered. They were silent. They heard nothing but the whistling wind, but Sanzo trained his ears to listen harder. There was a small undercurrent of noise, the sounds of men fighting, but it was clearly distant. Aka seemed to think for a moment, and nodded. "They're doing some coordinated exercise. Sounds like they're east of us. I'll take us an extra hundred meters west, just to be certain. Stay close to me." Aka got back up and dusted his knees off. Sanzo, Hakkai, and Goku did the same, and the four began to walk closer together.

Sanzo took the opportunity to study Aka again. His bright smile, his intense eyes, there was something too familiar about him, but he couldn't place it. Something nagged at his bones, something itched at his heart, and he couldn't define it. He still held the now-crumpled piece of paper in his hand, and began to carefully smooth it out. The creases still stuck, but they were only defined where he usually folded it. His heart ached, but he swallowed hard and ignored it.

In his own mind, he relived the moment they'd fallen through the seal. He looked at his hands, and at the ground. He couldn't fathom how Gojyo had slipped away from him. He glowered at Hakkai, silently cursing him for reminding him. He hated that he'd been forced to lie to him again:

_"I won't let you go. I will never let you go."_

His own, lost words, gagged by the whirling winds of the void, burned the inside of his head. _"Never. Never. Never let you go." _He sighed heavily, folding the little piece of paper back up and tucking it into his back pocket. This, he knew, was what was aching him. Aka's voice. Aka's eyes. Aka's smile. He was too much like Gojyo, and it rubbed him raw.

That night, they found an abandoned hut and holed down for the night. The moon wasn't visible behind the gray clouds, and the inside of the hut was pitch black. There was very little in the hut to speak of, only the frame of a roughly constructed cot and chunks of furniture that had been destroyed. Aka was very resistant to the idea of any light at all, but Hakkai insisted on starting a small fire on a large chunk of dry wood. The four of them gathered around the little bit of light, waiting for conversation to join them. Sanzo pulled his cigarette box from his back pocket and lit one up from the fire. He watched Aka carefully, who was glowering into the fire with no light in his eyes. The smiles he'd worn during the day were gone. Suddenly, he got to his feet.

"I'm going to stand watch outside. Sleep if you're tired." He moved for the door, but Hakkai called after him:

"Shouldn't we divide watch shifts?"

"Not necessary." Aka shook his head. "I'm kind of your escort, so it's my responsibility. Besides, what would you do if you were approached?"

"I'm still perfectly competent with martial arts," Hakkai replied defensively.

"But since you're used to using your chi, you won't be as competent overall. Adjusting to fighting without that aid is a severe handicap." He scowled. "I don't want any of you guys getting hurt."

"I'll simply have to do some practicing without it tomorrow. I feel like something of a rake, asking a boy to stand guard over men."

"You asked me for nothing. I offered. Good night." Aka left, shutting the door behind him, leaving the other three in silence. Goku groaned and stretched his legs out.

"Aka's like a cool big bro," he chirped, his voice almost sing-song. "He's shiny, kind of. He's like if you were nice!" He grinned at Sanzo, who pitched the harisen at him. Goku deftly dodged it, and used the harisen to fan his face instead. "I hope we find a way to get him out of here too. I bet his big brother's even cooler than he is."

"Let's worry more about ourselves first. I'm going to sleep." Sanzo placed his robe on the bare cot and stretched out. Hakkai sighed and curled up against the wall. Goku flopped down on the floor and closed his eyes. He was quickly snoring. Sanzo couldn't tell whether or not Hakkai was asleep, but he was still and breathing slowly. He, however, couldn't sleep. The wind outside sounded like a crying child, and guilt began to scrape at his skin.

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**(Suggested Track: "The Tain (Pt. 1)" by The Decemberists. **If listening to the full song, Part 1 ends at about 2:03. In the music video, Part 1 runs to 2:18.**)**

The two guards held Gojyo in a dark hall somewhere behind the fortress's entrance hall for almost an hour, and took turns wailing on him with their fists. Gojyo held still and took it. They punched him in the gut, they pinched his inner elbows, they stumbled him by cracking the back of his knees with a club. He didn't try to get up, didn't try to dodge or resist. When one guard slammed his fist into his nose, he heard the other tell him, "Watch the face, the King would rather him stay pretty." The guard scoffed and began to pound his fist into the back of Gojyo's head instead. Blood streamed from his nose unchecked. Gojyo felt himself get dizzier with each punch, but he held onto the one thought that kept him from screaming and fighting back:

_ "He wants to break me. I'm not giving him what he wants."_

After an hour, they seemed to tire of it. He was thoroughly bruised, and didn't have the strength to stand. One of the guards slapped him across the face, but he was too limp to resist. His nose was still bleeding, and he had to breathe heavily through his mouth. Suddenly, someone grabbed his face and forced him to look up. King Rat was there, and he had a small piece of parchment in his hand. He gripped Gojyo's jaw to force it open wider, but Gojyo resisted as much as he could. In spite of his efforts, Nezuoh managed to shove the paper between his lips, and forced his mouth shut. Gojyo tried to spit it out, but was too weak to open his mouth against his grip. Unable to breathe for the blood in his nose, he swallowed the paper, and Nezuoh released his grip. Gojyo gasped hard for breath, spitting out what he could, but he knew it had gone down whole. Nezuoh shook his head.

"Piteous fool." He waved one limp-wristed arm, and the two guards picked Gojyo up by his limp arms and hoisted him off. His dizzy head counted two flights of stairs, though he wouldn't swear by it, and down another hallway. They stopped at the end of the hallway, after passing several doors. They threw the last door open and pitched him at the wall as hard as two men could. His head cracked against the stone, and everything was dark for a long time.

The next thing he was aware of was a quiet, weary voice calling out to him: "Hello?" This was enough to remind him that the world was still there, and his eyes shot open. The swollen red moon poured pink light across the floor from a long, thin window flush to the ceiling. He heard soft coughing, and the voice called out again, "Is someone there?" He sat up slowly- his body ached all over- and looked around. "Anybody?" Something about that voice reminded him of prayers. The source of the voice coughed again, a bit louder, and the resemblance was gone. "Hello?"

"I'm here," Gojyo finally replied, and he began to survey the room. Though the perimeter of the room was lined with shadows, he could see that nobody else was in the room with him. He wiped the dried blood from his nose and cracked the joints in his shoulders. He could feel his shifted bones falling back into place- perhaps thanks to the paper Nezuoh had fed him, he thought. Even his nose felt better. "I'm here. Where are you?"

"Wave your arms. It's dark, but I can see your shadow." Gojyo rolled his eyes and held his hands out. Now that he was fully awake, he could identify the voice as belonging to a young man, a voice yet to drop another half-octave in pitch. He waved his hand back and forth. "Ah." He heard rustling from somewhere, and then a soft thump on the left side of the room. "Are you in a cell, too?"

"Would I be talking to you if I could leave here? I need to get the hell out of here," Gojyo muttered, but he tried to get to his feet. His knees wobbled out from under him, and he lost confidence and instead crawled towards the wall. "What did he lock you up for?"

"It's a long story." The boy's voice cracked as he stopped to cough again, but he cleared his throat and continued, "You'd probably find it boring. How about you?"

"Probably a longer story, and one you definitely don't want to hear," he muttered, and he began to examine the wall with his fingers for the source of the voice. "You got a name, kid?"

"Don't call me kid. It's Ryuji." Gojyo finally found a gap between the stones. He could fit four fingers into it, but couldn't feel the other side of the wall. "You?"

"Gojyo." He felt a finger on top of his, and jerked his hand back. He put his eye to the hole, but it was pitch black. Ryuji shifted, and he could just see the reflection of the iridescent moonlight against pallid skin.

"There you are," Ryuji said, and Gojyo could hear the smile in his voice and caught a glimpse of thin lips in an upturned crescent. "For what it's worth, I'm glad I'm not alone anymore. I've been in here almost ten months now, and it gets kind of lonely." Light appeared on the other side of the wall as Ryuji coughed again and slid back from the hole. Gojyo squinted to see a thin silhouette on the opposite side of the wall.

"Just kind of lonely? Sheesh, kid, don't blow it out of proportion like that." He chuckled at his own sarcasm. "Do you have any idea what time it is? I think I was kind of concussed for a while there."

"It's in the early hours. The sun will probably be up in about three hours, maybe less. I can't be sure sometimes." He saw the silhouette shift, lowering his head. "The guards, they play games with your head. They'll wake me up at random intervals when they're drunk, and deliberately keep me awake when it's dark. I can still tell the time from the sun, though, so they haven't fully disoriented me yet." Ryuji coughed again, and Gojyo shook his head.

"No sun out right now, kid."

"But the moon is out, and it's autumn, so I know the angles the light should fall at." He could hear Ryuji smiling again. "My old general, he told me about how the moon and stars sleep different places each season."

"You're a soldier?" Gojyo paid closer attention.

"I was... or, I am... or I was." He sounded insecure. "I... I've been kept in this place- not this dungeon, but this place on the whole- for more than five centuries. I doubt they even number us among their ranks anymore."

"Us?"

"Oh, my brother and I, we were both soldiers. We both got trapped down here. I think we're the only two not in Nezuoh's army here."

"You can add four to that number. If I'm here, my friends have got to be here as well." Gojyo grinned confidently.

"I'm sorry for that," Ryuji replied, suddenly somber, and it brought Gojyo down too.

"Don't apologize, kid; if anyone can get out of here, it's us."

"I don't know. We've been trying to escape since we got here. Our poor general, he must have ripped himself to shreds with worry by now."

"You think he's still worrying after five hundred years?" Gojyo rubbed his forehead. "Yeah, kid, I'm sure he just worrying his bones to dust."

"No, he must still live. The Army of Heaven is made up of near-deities, especially in the higher ranks."

"Army of Heaven, huh?" Gojyo smirked eagerly, clapping his hands together. "You mean the military force of the gods? Man, I could really use you on my side. You must have slaughtered thousands of uppity youkai, a few dozen scores of hanyou must be like child's play to you-"

"No, no, Heaven's soldiers can't kill. We can incapacitate or seal, but-"

"Lame," Gojyo grunted, hanging his head.

"It's not our place to take lives," Ryuji grumbled, and he coughed again, this time louder and deeper than before. Gojyo winced.

"Hey kid, you sick? How long have you had that cough?"

"Uh-uh-" He stopped to cough again, and spit something into his hand. "It's just a tickle in my throat. It's nothing, I just woke up with it." He wiped his hand off on his leg. Gojyo rolled his eyes again.

"Drink some water, kid."

"Where would I get water? And quit calling me kid."

"Eh, lighten up." Gojyo rolled his eyes, and Ryuji scoffed.

"It seems like they're leaving me alone. I'm not going to waste energy wondering why they're not pounding on my door and just sleep until its light. Good night, Mr. Gojyo."

Ryuji fell silent. Gojyo pressed his hand to the wall. "Good night, kid." He didn't respond, and Gojyo imagined he'd already fallen asleep. He, however, couldn't do the same.

He managed to get steady on his feet and rise, but his head was still dizzy. He leaned against the wall for a moment to get his bearings. He slowly circled the room, dragging his fingers on the wall. He circled it again, his head clearer and his body steadier, and felt the wall up and down for any gaps, loose stones, or weak spots. There were none but for the single hand's-width gap between his cell and the one next to his. The room itself was perhaps two meters long and three meters wide, with no cot or even a mat, and the floor was solid stone with a hole in the ground (probably meant for waste.) He checked around the hole carefully for loose stones. No such luck. The hole as it was wouldn't have been quite wide enough for him to fit his leg in. He found the door- girded with iron, reinforced like a safe. He tried to shoulder-rush it anyway, and instantly regretted it. After forcing his shoulder back into the socket, he looked at the window. It was about three meters off the ground, about a meter long and ten centimeters tall. He jumped, but couldn't quite grab the sill. He took a running leap and did, but the flaky mold growing on the sill didn't allow him to get a grip. He managed to get a look at the window itself- barred, to boot. He groaned, and leaned against the right wall to try and think. Ryuji's coughing distracted him; it was a wet cough, and sounded painful. He heard Ryuji's shuddering breaths between fits of coughing, and felt a chill run down his spine.

The hours passed. The moon's light reddened as it sunk, soon replaced by the gray-yellow light of the rising sun. Gojyo still leaned on the wall, thinking in vain. He realized that he hadn't had a smoke in a few hours, and began to dig through his pockets. He swore into his teeth as he realized they'd swiped all the cigarettes from his pocket, and his lighter was gone too. He glanced over at the wall where he knew Ryuji slept behind, and realized that him having a smoke probably would be bad for the poor kid's health anyway. He finally sank down to sit against the wall, and caught sight of light through the gap in the wall. Now that it was light, he could get a much better look through the slim aperture at the boy he'd been speaking to. Ryuji was laid flat on the floor, with pale, spindly legs sprawled awkwardly from under what was left of a plain muslin robe, and thin arms crooked over his head like birch branches. His face was slender and would have been very pretty were it not as hollow and tired; as it was, his eyes were sunken like an old man's and one was healing from being blackened, his lips wrinkled from dehydration, with blood around the edges and smeared on his chin. Still, Gojyo knew he had to be pretty under that layer of grime. "Maybe if he were a few years older, he'd look like someone I know," he thought to himself. His long-lashed eyes fluttered open and shut as he drifted in and out of dreams. His irises, from what Gojyo could see, were brilliant blue. His hair was cut evenly around his chin and parted in the center, but it tumbled in unkempt knots across his forehead and face, blonde like pale honey. There was something, Gojyo decided, oddly poetic about such a pretty boy being locked up, his lanky limbs askew, his spun-sunlight hair in tangles. His heart burned against his skin- what did King Rat want with this kid? His stomach suddenly began to ache again, and Ryuji coughed again, louder than before. Gojyo finally shrank back and looked away.

He decided something felt very wrong about all this. He couldn't place his finger on it, but something felt wrong, something even he couldn't imagine.

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**End Notes**: And with that, all the players are in place. I do hope everyone is enjoying the read!

As always, I love to hear your feedback, critique, or questions! I do have a question for you readers out there: What is your opinion on longer chapters? I usually try to keep chapters between 7-9 pages (as they appear in my word processor) but some of the upcoming chapters may end up a little longer. I have previously gotten complaints about chapters being too long. Would you be put off by longer chapters, or are you more comfortable with shorter chapters? Please share your opinions. If you have any questions that you would like me to answer, please leave me a review! If you spotted any of my sleep-deprived/mentally depraved screw-ups, please let me know! Or, in short...

Like it? Review!

Dislike something? Review!

Hated it? Review! (And do be specific.)

Questions? Review!

Anything? Review!

Nothing? Try to review anyway!

Remember, I can't give you a better story unless you tell me what you want to see! Until next week!


	5. Illusions

**King Rat, No Mercy**

Author's Notes: I don't think I have anything this week. Bugger.

RodiSquall- Thanks again for the corrections!

Disclaimer: Still not mine! At all. Except for the original characters, and I'm not profiting off of them.

* * *

**5: Illusions**

Aka hadn't returned to the hut after going out on guard duty when the party rose to the sun's light. The dawn wasn't worth watching, a dull sun against a gray sky, an inglorious beginning to the day. Hakkai was the second to rise, and spotted Sanzo gazing out the window, smoking the usual morning cigarette. "You really ought to conserve those, you know. I don't know when you'll next be able to get more," Hakkai commented, stretching and grunting as he got to his feet. He had slept poorer nights before, but there was something especially miserable about waking this morning. Sanzo grumbled inaudibly in response. "You'll have to speak louder."

"I said, I'll deal with that when it happens," Sanzo snapped, much louder than before. This roused Goku, who opened his bleary eyes and smacked his lips.

"When's breakfast? I'm hungry."

"Are you?" Hakkai turned to Goku with an inquisitive eyebrow raised. Goku thought for a solid thirty seconds, and shook his head. Hakkai nodded, resting his hand on his chin. "None of us have eaten in more than twenty-four hours, yet I certainly feel no hunger. I imagine that if this place is as dead as our young guide says, our bodies shouldn't experience the trappings of life, as it were."

"So you mean, we're not gonna get hungry?" Goku frowned, and lifted his shirt to look at his stomach. "But, if I'm not hungry, I don't get to eat."

"We'll probably be incredibly hungry when we get back to our world; however, we're all in decent body condition, so a few days without eating won't hurt us too much." Hakkai turned back to Goku and smiled brightly. "Rule of three, right?"

"Is that the one about three being magic?" Goku cocked his head curiously.

"No, no, a survival rule." Hakkai held up three fingers and counted them off. "The average human being can survive three weeks without food, three days without water, and three minutes without air. I imagine that as long as we drink here and there, our bodies will be fine once we return. We'll have a decent excuse to load up on calories. Perhaps a buffet, or the like."

"That sounds awesome!" Goku pumped his fists. "Come on, the sooner we find Gojyo, the happier we'll be!" Sanzo stubbed his cigarette out on the edge of the cot and pulled his robe on. He seemed to be in no mood to argue.

The trio stepped outside into the dawn light. Aka was standing atop a ridge nearby, staring towards the sun. He seemed to be in a daze, eyes wide and blank. Hakkai gently tugged his sleeve, and he snapped back to attention. He whirled around, reaching for his spear, but stopped.

"Oh. I'm sorry." He stared at Hakkai for a moment, still wide-eyed.

"You didn't sleep at all, did you?" Hakkai asked him, concerned. Aka shook his head.

"It's fine. I'm not tired." Aka stretched his arms and legs, getting on his tiptoes and pushing his fists towards the sun.

"Do we still require sleep, then?" Hakkai followed up, and Aka stumbled back onto even footing. "We've already deduced that we don't seem to hunger in this place."

"Sleep is different. Rest is beneficial to the soul and mind." He pulled his left leg up behind him and squeezed the thigh muscle, his face twisting into a grimace.

"And is there some reason you refuse to take advantage of this benefit?" Aka's eyes darkened at Hakkai's sly accusation, and he let his leg down.

"I told you. I've tasked myself with escorting you, and I'm going to guard you. That's all." He beckoned the trio to step up the small ridge, and began to move forward. Aka was using his spear as a walking stick now, and Hakkai noticed that he had a distinct limp in his left leg. Aka followed Hakkai's eyes, and dismissed him with a simple, "I tripped."

"Ahh. Well, then, shall we?" Hakkai smiled, pushing it out of his mind and looking forward. The four walked closer together. Goku ducked and weaved his way into position directly at Aka's side again. However, they were all quiet. Perhaps it could be attributed to a poor night of sleep, or a simple reluctance to explore their situation any more than they needed to, or perhaps some of both. Hakkai knew his companions well, and he could quickly assume that Sanzo was trying as hard as he could to ignore just how deep of trouble they were in. He, himself, was perhaps guilty of the same thing. He kept his pace up to stay close to Aka. "Is there anything else you can tell us about this realm?"

"What do you mean?" Aka kept looking forward.

"You've been here for over five centuries, correct? Have you learned anything about this place, other than what you've told us?"

"There's nothing else to know," Aka shrugged. "It's a place of nothingness."

"Nothingness? That's something, isn't it?" Hakkai smiled wryly.

"Are there any animals?" Goku asked curiously. "I haven't seen anything we can cook."

"Well, yes, there are animals, the kind that are not human or humanlike," Aka conceded. "But they're few and far between, only the things that were around when this place was sealed and the rare creatures that are drawn in here. I'm not sure that was in the original designation of the seal, but it happened. Most things that end up in here that are considered food items generally end up as such eventually, or are at least hunted down. More worrisome are things like bugs, and disease carriers. They're less common, but they're here, and if someone comes across one, everyone they live near gets sick. What medics there were rebelled against the King early on, as they were some of the more intelligent in his group." The bitterness rolled off of Aka's tongue. "They were all killed. Now there's nobody to tend to their ills."

"The King killed his own doctors?" Sanzo interrupted, his visage wrinkling. "What a fool."

"Well, you know what they say about men with red hair," Aka joked sarcastically. "Bad temper, rash judgment, that sort of thing."

"Aww, you're not like that!" Goku mussed Aka's hair, but Aka pushed his arm away. Goku pouted, and Aka continued.

"As I was saying: Bodies still rot away, worms still crawl when it rains- and it does rain, though rarely- and careful eyes may spot the occasional fox or mole. It's like a threadbare image of the world you know. If you're just looking for food, you're out of luck." He sighed, lifting his spear a bit higher as they began to scale a hill. "They grow rice and winter wheat, but they turn it all into alcohol. If you're really desperate, you could eat the leftover mash. But you don't need to eat, so I wouldn't recommend it."

"Did you try it?" Goku leaned close to Aka again. Aka wrinkled up his nose, and Goku guffawed excitedly. "You totally did!"

"We were trying to eat once a day, we hadn't yet realized we didn't need to!" Aka whined defensively. Hakkai chuckled as well. Sanzo, however, felt something nagging at him.

"This king- you've spoken of him briefly, yet you've told us precious little about him," Sanzo interrupted quietly. Aka didn't seem to know how to respond. "You mentioned he was sealed here, he's locked your brother away, and that you were the one who sealed him here. Who, exactly, is this King Rat?"

Aka looked back at Sanzo, then turned to look forward. "Didn't I tell you? He's the self-made king of hanyou."

"How so?" Hakkai picked up the conversation's thread, clearly curious. "Hanyou are men and women of different countries, born everywhere. How can one man make himself a king?"

"How do I put this?" Aka mused to himself. He spoke louder, "He's something of a jack-of-all-trades; he's dabbled in warfare, magic, and even holy powers. However, he was best known for his charisma. He could whip anyone into a rage with his words alone." He cast his eyes away, adding as an aside, "From what I hear, his sanity has gradually dwindled, to the point where the only one he can anger is himself." He looked forward. "But he built up his army- his people- for the purpose of taking over Heaven and called himself King as their leader. Even when they were dragged down to this place, they didn't rebel against him. I felt like I was the only one who could see him for who he was. That's probably why..." He sighed anxiously as he continued to recount, "Early on in our time here, he had both my brother and myself locked up." Aka hunched his shoulders and shivered. "It hurts to even remember it." He stopped walking, his legs quaking. "He changed his shape and turned himself into my brother. After a few days, I started believing he was my brother. It was..." He stopped talking suddenly, jaw loose, eyes wide. Hakkai waved his hands before his eyes, but Aka grabbed his wrist and pushed aside. His breathing was suddenly ragged. His hand was surprisingly strong, and Hakkai felt his bones start to ache, until Aka seemed to come to his senses. "Sorry." His voice lacked emotion, let alone regret, as he released Hakkai's hand. "He released the two of us after he got bored of tormenting us, and we got as far away from him as possible. We've tried to avoid him since, and we were doing fine, until Ryuji got captured again. I don't know why he captured Ryuji. I don't like the king." He was quiet again, and he picked up his pace to walk faster. Hakkai could see his left leg shaking through his baggy, knee-length pants as he marched forward.

"I hate to bring up such bad memories, but it's very hard to move forward unless we know what to anticipate," he said, his voice as soft and pleasant as he could make it. Sanzo frowned, and he began to dig through his pockets once more. He stopped when he realized Hakkai had caught sight of him, and pulled out another cigarette instead.

The group walked on, down the little hill they'd climbed, facing the vast plain before them. The sky was a dull, endless gray, and they could see small, thin white clouds streaking it in long, whiplash shapes. The plain itself was mostly dust, dry like sand. A harsh wind blew eastward across it, and weak, broken grass rushed at their faces. It felt sharp and rough on their bare skin. The wind caught their clothes like sails, nearly pushing them backwards. The sun, a weak, orange orb, appeared low on the horizon still, dim but hot. The air was already stifling; even the angry wind didn't refresh them. Still, turning around would be pointless, as there was nothing behind them. All they could do was move forward, in hopes of finding some sign that they were moving in the right direction.

* * *

Someone dumped a bucket of water on Gojyo, and it was only then that he realized he'd been asleep at all. His heart pounded in his chest, and he panicked. He managed to scramble onto his knees and crawl to the waste pit before his stomach rejected his spit. He felt like his insides were inverting themselves, and acid burned his throat.

"Get another bucket," the guard standing at the door yelled behind him. "He's gonna need it." Gojyo looked up for a split second- he imagined he could push past the guard into the hallway- but this delusion vanished as his body convulsed, sending him back towards the floor. He hunched over again and retched hard. Nothing came out, but his stomach kept trying to empty itself.

"Mr. Gojyo, are you okay?" Ryuji's faint voice called. He sounded like he'd been woken up, his speech slurred, but the noise only irritated Gojyo.

"Sh-shut up," Gojyo snapped as he tried to catch his breath. He spit to clear the last of the acid from his mouth. His stomach felt bloated, his head ached like bees were nesting in his forehead. "Damn it, how the hell do I have a hangover? I wasn't drinking last night..." The guard dumped another bucket of water onto him, and Gojyo flinched as icy water drenched his back. He slowly turned his head to glare up at the guard, malice in his eyes. "You guys are assholes."

"Come on, you're coming with us," the guard muttered, hiding an amused smirk under his helmet. He took a set of manacles from the wall beside the door and cuffed Gojyo's wrists. Gojyo refused to stand, refused to move, so the guard and another lugged his limp body into the hallway by the back of his jacket. He spotted the door to Ryuji's cell next to his, and tried to kick it. "None of that," the guard grumbled, yanking him by his collar hard enough to choke him. The guard hauled him up a flight of stairs with ease, and Gojyo dragged his feet the entire way. "You better act right. It ain't often we interrogate prisoners like this."

"Izzat so?" Gojyo sneered, and he jerked briefly at his manacles in a feeble attempt to get loose. "Well, lucky, lucky me."

"Tch." The guard opened a door to a darkened room, and removed Gojyo's manacles. Gojyo tried to rush past the guard, but he caught Gojyo on his arm and easily tossed him into the room and slammed the door shut. He heard the lock click behind him. He couldn't see anything in the pitch-black room, and began to feel around (though he felt inexcusably stupid in doing so.) He couldn't make out any features of the room, beyond something soft and slick near the door and a lot of cold stone wall.

**(Suggested Track: "Missed Me," The Dresden Dolls)**

"Look, could I at least get a cigarette if you're gonna fuck around with me?" He demanded with a spiteful smirk accentuating his taunt. There was no answer, but a light appeared. He could see a table now from a lantern mounted on the wall, with a bottle and another candle on it. That candle caught ablaze, then another, and Gojyo spotted a thin figure in the shadow. He moved towards it, and it held the light to its face. His insides chilled as he recognized it; no, how could it be, how could she be here? "M-mother."

"Ugly brat," his stepmother's voice hissed back at him, and her thin, knobby fingers traced the scars on his cheek. "How are you still alive?" He pushed her back, his stomach churning again.

"No, you're not here," he growled as she vanished into the shadows. "You're dead. This is a dream, you're dead." Another candle sprung to life on the far end of the room.

"Does she still haunt you?" A familiar, bored voice asked from beside the candle. Gojyo came closer, as the speaker lit another candle. There sat Sanzo, wearing a borrowed black shirt and his usual tight pants, sitting on a cot with candles on either side of him. Gojyo felt his fists clench instinctively.

"I got over her a long time ago, idiot. I was just surprised. You, of all people, should know that." Gojyo sneered, and he folded his arms and glowered at Sanzo. "I know it ain't really you."

"Oh? And what makes you say that?" Sanzo rose to his feet and slowly approached him, like a tiger closing in on a rabbit. Gojyo put his chest close to Sanzo's and glared down into his eyes.

"You don't smell the same." He'd had to think hard on it, but it was true. He could place Sanzo's smell anywhere, but this Sanzo smelled like nothing.

"Really?" The observation hadn't fazed him. "Why don't you try a taste?" Sanzo yanked Gojyo's face to his and forced a wet, angry kiss onto his tongue. A thousand uncontrollable synapses screamed perverse thoughts down his spine, buzzing in his hips like the bees' nest in his head had migrated south and imploded. Gojyo choked and forced Sanzo back, his heart pounding again. He couldn't say it aloud, but the taste was identical.

"What the hell's gotten into you?" He spat, trying to clean his tongue.

"I don't know what you mean." Sanzo was smirking now. It looked wrong on his stoic, stiff features, twisted against cheeks that almost never moved. His voice was twisted, too; it sounded much more expressive than usual. Gojyo took a few deep breaths to calm himself down.

"You're definitely not Sanzo. Not the real one. Get the fuck away from me." He stumbled back a few steps, his gut still churning, his head still spinning.

"So perhaps you mean I'm not the genuine article." Sanzo slowly slunk towards Gojyo, and Gojyo froze. His lazy purple eyes were suddenly alight with some unholy combination of sex and derision. "Fine. Believe what you will. But I am Sanzo. I'm your Sanzo." He slung his arms around Gojyo's neck, and Gojyo couldn't move. His touch was searing hot, but it still gave him chills. "I'm the Sanzo that lives in your head, the Sanzo you constructed in your mind. I'm the Sanzo you dream about. I'm your ideal Sanzo, and your nightmare Sanzo, all in one. I'm your Sanzo. Your pounding heart is real enough, isn't it?" Sanzo's smile was nearly seductive. Gojyo slammed his palm against Sanzo's chest, pushing him back a meter.

"I only want the real one."

"I am real, but if you insist." Sanzo threw his hands up in a shrug and turned towards the cot. "Let's at least talk. Perhaps I can help you figure out why you see me like this. Why you want to see me like this." He sat back down on the cot, legs spread in a casual sprawl that the real Sanzo would never dream of adopting. Gojyo folded his legs and arms and sat on the floor.

"I don't want to talk to you. You might as well send me back to my little cell now."

"You can't lie to me," Sanzo lilted, almost sing-song. "I can tell what you want." He pulled his shirt off, lily-pale skin alight in the candle's flickering illumination. Gojyo wanted to look- and he couldn't stop himself. Sanzo was just too impossibly lovely under his clothes, and it made his insides squirm from trying to suppress his lust. It was very rare that Sanzo let him get a good look at what he was touching. He forced himself to look away, and reminded himself:

"No. You're not what I want. The only guy I'm interested in is the real Sanzo."

"I told you. I am real." Sanzo rose again and circled behind Gojyo. Gojyo pulled his elbows in, trying hard not to touch him. "I'm as real as that half-erection tugging at your zipper." He blew cold air Gojyo's ear, and Gojyo flinched and tried to push him back. Sanzo grabbed onto his shirt collar, and whispered in his ear, "Unless you really want me to treat you like he does."

"What the hell do you mean?" Gojyo turned to look at him, but Sanzo wound his arm back and slapped him in the face.

"You really want me to be cruel to you?" Sanzo scowled, circling around in front of Gojyo and looking down at him. Gojyo gritted his teeth, rage welling up in his throat. He could only think of one time Sanzo had hit him with an open palm, and it stung him to remember it. Sanzo grabbed Gojyo's face with both hands and whispered, "And I was under the impression you wanted me to love you."

"Hey, fuck off!" Gojyo snarled and shoved Sanzo back again. "I never wanted a damn thing from you! Don't I always do what you want anyway?!" He stopped, realizing he'd said too much.

"Am I really so demanding of you?" Sanzo had stumbled back towards the cot, but caught himself on his elbows. "You've just adapted the way you treat me to what you think I expect, isn't that true? You think I want you to be subtle. That's not you, is it? I never asked you to hide anything, did I? Don't you wish you could wrap your arms around me, kiss me whenever you wanted to?" Sanzo pushed himself back up and wrapped his arms around Gojyo again. "What if I would let you?" Gojyo froze up, his heart throbbing and thrashing his lungs, his skin hot. He felt Sanzo wrapping himself around him, his slender arms cold against his body. He felt Sanzo's lips on his neck- and his palm over his navel.

"No, no, you're not real, you're not Sanzo!" Gojyo roared. He threw Sanzo's arms off and stumbled away from him. Sanzo simply smirked at him, and his skin crawled.

"Would it really be so bad if I was?" Sanzo got to his feet and took the bottle off the table. Gojyo continued backing up towards the wall, trying to put as much space between the two of them as he could. Sanzo was impossibly fast and soon had him cornered, holding the uncorked bottle at arm's length. Before Gojyo could panic, the bottle was under his nose, and he passed out.

The guard at the door heard six knocks followed by two quick raps, and unlocked the door. Nezuoh emerged, adjusting a sash over a red tunic and baggy pants. "He will give you no trouble on the way back. Thank you for your patience."

"Has he succumbed?" The guard asked.

"As I said. Patience." Nezuoh wagged one finger and smirked. He pulled his ornate robe from a hook inside the room and pulled it on over his plain clothes. "I've got to feel out all the cracks before I can slip into them." He turned his eyes back to Gojyo, who was snoring loudly on the floor. "I can only hope he sees the light soon. The sand in the hourglass sinks lower by the hour, and it would be unfortunate if he were to lose something important." Nezuoh's thin, contemplative smirk put wrinkles under his eyes, as he turned on his heel and strolled away. "Unfortunate for him, at least."

* * *

Gojyo knew he was dreaming. He felt too small for it to be anything but a dream. The world looked wrong, though he couldn't place exactly how. The trees were unusually brown, though the air was warm. Apples that were a strange shade of yellow hung over his head. He didn't recognize anything; the world felt oddly foreign to him, too cold, too dull. A woman's voice cried out over his head:

"Someone, someone! These boys' mother is dead, have they no father?" His vision was blurry, certainly, but he could make out the sight of part of a woman. He could also see a baby wrapped tight in a bundle, held in half of a woman's arms, though he could make out very few features. He could tell that there were big blotches of indeterminate color all over the sheet the child was wrapped in, and he could assume it was blood. A few locks of wild hair hung out from the sheet around his head, and Gojyo knew, though he couldn't quite see it, that it was red. Red like blood. He tried to reach out to the child to get a closer look, but he couldn't move; his arms were wrapped tight against his body. He tried to wriggle loose, tried to speak, but his voice only came as a whimper. Still, the woman's voice cried out, "Who would make twins orphans? Who knew their mother?!"

"Calm yourself," an older woman's angry voice answered. "Shame the dead no more! That woman dead in your bed was my daughter." Gojyo couldn't see the source of this new voice, but the rage in her voice made his head ache. "My girl was a whore. These boys have a dozen fathers, at least, and not one would dare step forward to claim these whelps."

"If they are your daughter's children, won't you take them?" He felt himself being pushed forward abruptly, and just as quickly pushed back.

"I have no interest in these children." He felt eyes roving his face, though he couldn't tell from where. "I will take the fair one, but the abomination may as well be drowned."

"No, no, you can't separate twins! If you cannot love both, then I'll give you neither!"

"Then take them elsewhere. I won't have a hanyou as my daughter's legacy!"

Gojyo wanted to scream, wanted to rage- how dare she reject him! Who the hell did she think she was?!- but his voice was only a weak cry. "Fine, then," the midwife's voice snarled back. He felt the world begin to shake, and his eyes closed.

He reopened them to a gray, stormy sky. He still couldn't move, but he could feel something behind him, touching his head. A face appeared above his- that of a kind-looking old man with a shaven head.

"My, my. A human and a hanyou? What a curious set of brothers."

Moments later, he found himself at the center of an argument: "We ought to send the taboo back!" One monk argued angrily. He was staring at a ceiling, laid on the table with the other infant placed directly next to him. Gojyo's blood boiled again, but he could say and do nothing.

"There's nowhere to send him back to," another monk grumbled. "He'll be a hex on us all."

"We send him back to the underworld, that's what we do," a third growled.

"No, no need to kill him," the second protested. "Perhaps we just leave him elsewhere, and..."

"No, no, no," the old monk said as he entered the room, his sudden presence an overwhelming force of calm. "The midwife I spoke to insists that they were twins. They were brought together, they stay together. It would be unkind and unjust to separate them. Let's just name them and give them each a rag to suck on, and whatever hexes they bring upon us, we'll take them as they come."

"Well, I've a perfect name for the ugly bastard," one of the younger monks sneered. "Let's just call him Aka."

"And the older of the two?" The old monk chuckled. "Perhaps a name with strength enough for both of them: Ryuji."

Ryuji, thought Gojyo. Was this Ryuji's mind? If so, how was he suddenly privy to it? The world was suddenly dark, and everything was oblivion again. He would find no answers in the darkness, he knew this much. He could only wait for morning light.

* * *

**End Notes:** One quick language note! I don't use Japanese terms very often, but names are different. (After all, it would be kind of weird if a story taking place in even an anachronistically medieval China using Japanese names had people with names like Bob and Kevin.) Aka and Ryuji's names are no exception. Aka, of course, means red. That's the joke. Ryuji, however, is a more traditional name- found it on a naming website and everything! It's properly spelled Ryuuji, but lazy little me, I prefer to type Ryuji. Ryuji (or Ryuuji) comes from a similar root as Ryuuichi: Ryuu, meaning dragon, and ichi, meaning one. Hence, Ryuuichi would mean "first dragon." However, "ji" in Ryuji's name means "two" or "second," like Eiji means "great second son." Ryuji is the first son, but he was named second, and that's how I justify that. Yay me!

As for why I decided on the name Ryuji? It sounds so good when you scream it. What do I mean by that? You'll just have to keep reading to find out! (And no, it's nothing like "Remember my name, you'll be screaming it later." He's like fifteen, don't be weird.)

I do hope this chapter was not particularly confusing. If you're at all confused about what exactly happened in the last scene (or elsewhere) I'd be happy to clarify further what exactly is going on. Just let me know!

In other words...

Questions? Review!

Comments? Review!

Stuff you want to see? Ideas for a hilarious omake that we're all gonna need? Review!

Predictions? I'd love to see them, review!

Anything? Review!

Nothing? Review anyway!

The next chapter may be in two weeks, as I've been busy with class and such. (I'm taking some baking classes, and the early mornings and 4 hours of lab twice a week are kind of kicking my ass.) If I have a chance to catch up with my writing, then chapter 6 should be ready next Friday! Until then, don't forget to review!


	6. Still a Kid

**King Rat, No Mercy**

**Author's Notes:** I only just realized, I made the story title "King Rat: No Mercy," but switched the colon with a comma in the chapters. I'm not sure why I did that. Chalk up one more fail for me!

I also want to warn everyone one more time before we get any further, shit is going to start going downhill. I mean, please, by all means, keep your hopes up, it's going to get better eventually, but I honestly briefly considered filing this story as "horror" at one point. Hemophobes who are triggered by descriptions, beware! (I'd warn homophobes, but they've already run screaming by this point.)

RodiSquall- Baking!Sanzo? Oh god, that would be the best DS game ever. Cooking Sanzo 2: Cooking with (Bad) Friends!

Disclaimer: Not mine. Not profiting. God I wish I could.

* * *

**6: Still a Kid**

Morning light came, though sorely absent of its usual, quiet dignity. His alarm happened to be his own name: "Mr. Gojyo!" Ryuji's terse voice wailed from the cell next door. "Mr. Gojyo, please wake up!"

"Come off it, kid, I'm awake!" Gojyo shouted back, feeling his shoulders and back tense already. He realized he'd been placed back in the cell, leaned against the wall, and he had no memory of leaving the "interrogation" room. His stomach was still bloated, but it was painful now, stiff like a stone. "Fuck," he grumbled, pounding his fist on the floor. "What the fuck is he doing to me?!"

"I-I'm not sure," Ryuji coughed weakly, and he coughed again, the sound muffled in his cupped palms. Gojyo shuddered as he launched into a coughing fit that echoed through the aperture, leaving him heaving for breath. It was enough to remind Gojyo that he wasn't the only one suffering here. "Th-the King... he's a real mothe- he's a f- he's a jerk." Ryuji cleared his throat. Gojyo leaned over to look through the hole at Ryuji. His face was wet and streaked red, his golden hair had blood in it now. "But I'm glad you're back. Those bas- They... they started torturing me again while you were gone."

"You look like shit, kid, what did they do to you?"

"They tied me to a board and whipped me. For four f... godda... four hours." Gojyo couldn't help but chuckle.

"You're allowed to cuss, kid, I don't give a shit."

"The goddess is listening. She's always listening and watching." He coughed again. "She loves me, I don't want to disappoint her." He seemed to have stopped near-swearing as his voice calmed.

"The goddess, huh." Gojyo thought for a moment. "Which goddess are you talking about? I mean, is there any specific one you swear to?"

"Kanzeon Bosatsu. The Goddess of Mercy. She's been the kindest to me, and I am her servant." Ryuji looked at his hands. Gojyo could see that his palms were soaked with his own blood, streaking down his arms from wounds that still hadn't closed.

"I don't see no mercy on you, kid."

"I told you to stop calling me a kid!" Ryuji reached to rub his eyes with the back of his hand. "I'm not a kid. Nobody calls me a kid like that."

"I do. You are a kid." Gojyo smirked; he couldn't help but get a rise out of the boy. "Come on, cheer up, you're safe now. I'm back, they're not here. At least you're not alone, right?"

"I'm not a kid. I'm not a kid." Ryuji inhaled sharply and heaved a choking cough out. "They left me here hours ago, but they wouldn't let me lick my wounds in peace. Someone was standing at the door, whispering something, over and over. Pounding on the door in rhythm. I'm not even sure how much of it was real, or how much I was imagining it, but he kept doing it. It was driving me insane."

"Insane, huh?" Gojyo frowned. "Kid- Ryuji, you said you've been here ten months?"

"Yeah. Not my first time here, to be honest, but they let me run wild for more than five hundred years up until they arrested me again."

"Great, so you've got some experience at this. Do you know how, exactly, they torture people?"

"I guess they beat you up a lot." Ryuji hung his head. "That's what they do to me. They beat the daylights out of me, they kick me around, they smash my head on the wall, they push my head in water until I near drown. Although..." He coughed into his elbow and spit into his hand. Gojyo watched him smear blood onto the wall as he continued to cough into his other fist.

"Fuckin' hell, you're getting worse. Kid, you've probably got pneumonia or some whooping cough shit, they gotta get you to a medic or something-"

"There's no doctors down here, no medicine. It's nothing. Just a tickle in my chest. Besides, it's coming out anyway, right?" Ryuji laughed weakly, and rubbed his eyes again. "When I was first locked up, the King himself would torture us. Me and Aka, I mean." He seemed to have fixed his focus on a point a meter above the gap in the wall, his gaze distant. "He could change his shape, and he could read our minds. He took me to this dark little room and spit out everything I hated about myself and my brother while looking like him." He shook his head slowly. "Then he'd shove us back in the same cell and let us argue the rest out. Aka really got confused, he was almost insane for a few months. He honestly thought that I was the one doing it, he forgot it was all a trick. I think that the King looked at us and thought, all the two of us had left was each other. He wanted to take that away, because he hates us. He wants us to suffer." Ryuji's voice broke. "I can't believe it took him five hundred years to figure out, he could have just let one of us go and kept the other here, and I'd be just as miserable."

"Well, sure, everyone knows you can't split twins up. Even I know that." Gojyo shook his head. Somehow, he felt as though he'd heard that sentiment often of late. Ryuji broke into coughs again, the kind of choking hack that rattles the soul. Gojyo waited for him to quiet again, and felt his stomach knot up into a cramp. His fingers dug into the skin like he could wring the pain out, and it was only now he realized his hand had drifted down to rub his stomach. He threw his hand back and grabbed his own wrist like he could scold it. Ryuji stopped coughing after a solid minute, and Gojyo felt the pain recede. He still tried to punish his hand, pressing his thumbnail into the blue vein running down his arm and giving his hand a threatening glare, and looked back to Ryuji. "I don't know what they're doing to me, but maybe if I ask, they'll help you. The King, he forced me to eat a little piece of paper, it might have been medicine. My body was healed from when they beat me up."

"Sounds like a talisman. Might have had some sort of healing spell incorporated, but without seeing it myself, I wouldn't be able to tell."

"Yeah, there's no way you're gonna see it. Again, I ate the damn thing; he pretty much shoved it down my throat. Doesn't matter, I'm pretty damn sure it was medicine. And you need some."

"Why do you think they would want to give me medicine? They hate me." Ryuji hung his head.

"If I asked, they might," Gojyo muttered, mentally reviewing all the information he had. There was very little there, but he knew for certain that Nezuoh was trying to convince him to submit. Ryuji lacked that information, and had to ask:

"Why?"

"That's... it's a long story," he sighed. He couldn't even imagine trying to explain it to a kid like him. "But long story short, that asshole King wants me to join him. They think I'm special or something. That's why he's got me locked up. But maybe if I make some sort of concession, they'll give you medicine."

"Don't," Ryuji whispered, his voice suddenly filled with malice. He launched himself towards the wall between their cells and screamed, "For the Gods' sakes, don't give even a little to them! What would your friends think!?" He punched the wall with his thin, bruised fists, his voice hoarse now that it was raised. "Don't be stupid! You can't sacrifice yourself for some stupid k-kid you barely even know!"

"Hey, don't give me that shit!" Gojyo snarled back, jumping to his feet. "You're sick, and you expect a man to stand by and let you hack your lungs out?!" Ryuji coughed again, and though Gojyo couldn't see it, he heard something wet splatter onto the floor. He shuddered to think what that might have been; he hadn't meant that last part literally.

"You can't give him what he wants," Ryuji hissed, spitting again. Gojyo felt his gut twist into a deep, painful cramp and muffled a groan into his palms. "No matter what it is he wants from you, don't give it to him. I won't forgive you if you sacrifice yourself to get me medicine- if you sacrifice yourself for anything! My life is inconsequential anyway. I'd rather be trapped here like all the other lost souls than know that someone else gave in on their morals for my sake."

"I got no morals, kid. I wouldn't be losing a thing," Gojyo muttered. This seemed to silence Ryuji for a moment.

"Really? No morals at all?" Ryuji managed a chuckle.

"Okay, I have some, but not many." Gojyo tilted his head back. "I'm... I'm loyal, that's one. It ain't much, but it's something." He pictured Hakkai, Sanzo, and Goku's faces on his eyelids, and it was enough to make him smile. Ryuji seemed to know what he was thinking.

"You wouldn't betray your friends over me, would you?"

"I don't even know if my friends know about this guy."

"He's the only important person down here; if there's anyone they're going to hear about, it's Nezuoh. Assuming they're alive, at least."

"They're alive. I'm sure they are," Gojyo muttered, and he shook his head. "They've gotta be."

"What makes you say that?" Ryuji sounded unimpressed, and Gojyo had to think for a moment. Finally, he allowed a bitter smile and a painful confession:

"An endless well of optimism," he muttered, and he spit his sarcasm at the wall with a speck of dirt. "God damn, I could really use a smoke. Those bastards... and I liked that lighter, too." He slipped his hand into his pocket and began to dig around in hopes he would find at least one loose cigarette. Ryuji burst into another coughing fit, his breath barely a wheeze between loud deep coughs. Gojyo halted, remembering why he'd stopped thinking about smoking the last time he'd gotten the urge; the boy sounded like he was choking on his breath. He heard Ryuji stumble forward, and listened with clenched fists and gritted teeth as he began to half-retch, half-cough thin blood onto the floor. "God damn it, kid, don't die on me." He ground his teeth as his stomach crumpled itself in another cramp. He could swear that his middle was swelling further. His chest suddenly felt tight, and he couldn't breathe. He felt, for a brief second, like his head was going to explode. Ryuji finally stopped, and the pain receded as well. He was able to catch his breath, and it seemed Ryuji was doing the same. He gazed down towards his navel, glowering down his abdomen. He didn't like that it was swollen like this, this he knew, nor did he like how firm it felt. This, he decided, had to be another one of Nezuoh's tricks.

"I won't," Ryuji mumbled.

"Eh?" Gojyo looked up.

"I'm... I'm not gonna die on you. I can't die. I need to wait for my little brother." Ryuji clenched his fist over his heart. "Aka, he and I have always been together. I don't know what he'd do without me, just like I don't know what I'd do without him."

"I guess you guys are best friends, right?" Gojyo smiled, thinking of his own childhood. "My brother and I, we used to be close too. We don't talk much anymore, but we were closer than front teeth. Stuff was bad- see, he's my half-brother, his dad ran around on his mom with my mom- and after both of my parents died, his mom took me in. She hated me. Can you see these scars?" He hunched his shoulders to put his face level with the hole. "I swear, she was about to tear my face off, but my brother stopped her. My big brother, he would always try to protect me from her." He looked at his feet. "He would do anything for me. I wish things were still like that, or that we could at least still talk. I haven't been able to talk to him in ages."

"To be honest, things are- or were- or are kind of the same for me and Aka," Ryuji conceded thoughtfully. He shuffled his feet and folded his hands on his knees. "They were always rotten to him. I didn't understand why at the time, but everyone who met him would practically spit on him, give him nasty looks, talk smack about him. They didn't even know him, and they treated him like he was the lowest of the low. It got to the point where I was just angry all the time, and if I wasn't angry, I was depressed. Being angry made me feel alive." He chuckled, and Gojyo felt his shoulders tense as Ryuji began to wheeze again. He caught his breath and continued, "One time, I picked a fight because I was so depressed, and I wanted to be mad so I wouldn't feel that way." He was quiet for a few minutes, as Gojyo tried to take everything in. "I'm still guilty of that sometimes. I'm sorry I yelled at you, before and all."

"I ain't mad, kid," Gojyo dismissed him. His whole body was covered in a cold sweat, and he peeled off his jacket and tossed it in the corner.

"I told you to stop calling me kid. I don't like it." Ryuji rubbed his nose.

"Stop calling me Mister. Makes me feel old."

"You are old," Ryuji chuckled. "But like I was saying, I was only like that because of him. And when things got better, it was still because we were together. We've been attached at the hip for most of our lives. Even for most of the time we've been here. I'm okay right now, but I have to wonder how he is." He sighed heavily, and pressed his face into his knees. "I miss him."

"I bet you do," Gojyo agreed sympathetically. "I gotta ask, why were they so cruel to him?"

"They didn't like the way he looked. I didn't understand until only a year ago. It just kinda hit me one day. That said, I still don't get just why it was so offensive."

"What exactly do you mean?"

"It's hard to explain," he mumbled. His tongue was starting to stumble over his words. He coughed again, quieter than the last, but still coming from very deep in his chest.

"You sound like you could use some sleep. How long was I gone, anyway?"

"At least five hours. I think you got back an hour after I did, and its been seven hours since then. It's no wonder you didn't get woken up earlier..."

"I seriously haven't eaten in more than two days now?" Gojyo muttered, leaning forward in surprise. "No wonder I'm starving."

"You're what?" Ryuji seemed to suddenly rouse, lifting his head again.

"I'm hungry. I want food." Gojyo realized he hadn't thought about it until just that second, but even if it was bloated he could tell his stomach was completely empty.

"You shouldn't be. Nobody gets hungry here. That's why they turn all their rice and wheat into booze."

"Yeah, I think that asshole who got me black-out wasted said something like that." Gojyo spread his knees and grabbed his middle with both hands, squeezing it like he thought he could break it off. "Doesn't change that I'm starving."

"There's nothing you can do, though. You're probably just imagining you're hungry, just because you're still used to eating. I used to think I was hungry too."

"Yeah, I guess." Gojyo pulled his hands away. "Thanks, kid."

"For what?"

"Distracting me. That rat... he made my head spin, he had me fooled." He shook his head. "For a few minutes, he made me think he was someone I... someone I consider a friend."

"Don't let him fool you. I won't forgive you for that, either." Ryuji curled up into a little ball, and leaned his head against the wall. "I'm tired. Leave me alone for a little while." Gojyo scooted over to the wall closest to Ryuji.

"I know it ain't fair for me to depend on you like this. You're still a kid, even though you hate it. I want you to depend on me, too."

"Yessir, General," Ryuji mumbled wearily. He was silent but for his ragged breath. Gojyo pressed his hand to the wall- he remembered that he'd mentioned his general before, acknowledging his slip as just that.

"Just sleep, kid. Maybe some sleep will make you feel better," he muttered, knowing full well he was lying to himself. His heart ached for Ryuji- how could that damn kid keep acting so aloof? "You keep talking about Heaven. You won't forgive me, like you could forgive me. What the hell has Heaven done for you lately?" Ryuji didn't answer; he was already alternating between snoring and coughing. Gojyo curled up himself, glaring at the walls. He reassessed all his options again.

"I can't get out the window. I can't reach it, and I can't fit through it anyway," he muttered, and pressed his hand into his swollen middle. It hurt; there was no give. "The walls are solid. I'm probably underground anyway. I could try and bum rush the guards, but they're tough as the walls." He paused, chewing his thumb as he thought. "I bet they've spent the last five centuries working out. I've spent the last two days in and out of being knocked out. If I'm gonna catch up with 'em, I better start now." He got down on the floor and started doing push-ups. It was hard- his knees felt weak, and the feeling of his gut brushing the ground made him feel nauseous, but he had to push through it.

If he couldn't be sure his friends were alive, then he was the only one who could save himself. He also knew he was the only one who could save Ryuji. He couldn't give in, or he wouldn't forgive himself.

* * *

Night passed, day passed, and Hakkai, Sanzo, Goku, and Aka still traversed the barren, empty wastes. Idle conversation had filled some of the time, at least for Hakkai and Goku, and rarely Aka. Sanzo remained quiet for hours on end. Hakkai wondered how he could be so absorbed in the workings of his own mind, but it served him well to remember that Sanzo was a monk, quite used to extended periods of meditation. Goku had no such restraint. He and Hakkai exchanged trivia and bad puns, and played what had to be history's most boring game of "I Spy." ("I spy with my little eye, somethiiiing... brown!" "If it's dirt again, I'm borrowing Sanzo's fan.") Aka would sometimes laugh along, but spent most of the day staring down the horizon. Hakkai, however, couldn't help but try to keep some watch over the young man.

Aka was still limping from his "trip" the night before last, and after vanishing into the darkness when they'd gone to sleep the previous night, he'd returned with bruises on his face and arms. Hakkai noticed that his clothes were dirtier when they woke. He'd also spotted Aka stumbling, and he often looked listless. These things in tandem convinced him that he needed to do something. He managed to catch a word with Sanzo, informing him of his plan, and Sanzo acceded and agreed not to interrupt.

When night fell again, they bedded down in a ditch. Aka sat alert as the trio made to rest, but none of them laid down. Instead, they all sat on their removed clothes and stared back at him. (Hakkai couldn't imagine why Goku was, only imagining that he was imitating him and Sanzo.) Aka didn't seem to catch their implication. "You all must be tired," he said firmly, wrapping his arms around his knees. "Get some sleep. I'll stay up and keep watch."

"Your eyes are bloodshot, your body shakes," Hakkai replied, sounding oddly nonchalant for the challenge he laid out: "If you will not sleep, then we will not."

"Mr. Hakkai, I told you, I'm not tired," Aka insisted, and he turned his head away from him. "I'm your guide and escort, and-"

"Young man, I have spent more than a quarter of a century on Earth, and I will not allow a child to be my guardian." Hakkai's voice was unusually stern, his smile slipping away.

"Have you forgotten that I've lived down here for more than five centuries?" Aka retorted, unfolding his arms and sitting up taller.

"Ah? And what were you five hundred years ago?" Hakkai had begun to slip into a more forceful persona, his eyes fixed on Aka in an almost-threatening hard gaze. "I can't imagine that you were even more than a perverse thought in your ancestor's forehead."

"I was alive," Aka growled. "I was thirteen. I would probably be long-dead if I weren't trapped here, stuck in stasis."

"Do you feel like an old man?" Sanzo suddenly interrupted. Aka seemed shocked by this question. He looked at his hands, and shook his head.

"I don't feel old, no. But I am technically still older than you."

"You still look like a kid," Goku added. "You also look really sleepy." He reached towards Aka with concern.

"I'm not." Aka pushed Goku's hand away.

"As I said, I will not sleep if you do not," Hakkai concluded, readopting his usual vague smile. "Since none of us will be sleeping, then why don't we trade stories? I know just the one." Aka shrugged his consent and sat down, crossing his legs and resting his spear on his shoulder. Hakkai leaned back and started, "It's been some time since we first left home, called into service by the Three Aspects. It was this one in particular who was summoned," he nodded to indicate Sanzo, "But he was instructed to take myself, Goku, and our fourth, Gojyo, with him. Does the name Gyuumaoh ring any bells?" Aka shook his head. "Ah. That must have come after your time. Five hundred years ago, he was sealed by Heaven. A certain person now seeks to unseal him, and we were tasked with traveling west to stop him..."

From there, Hakkai launched into a lengthy, winding recollection of their journey. Sanzo listened as Hakkai drifted into a monotone, recounting their adventures in as disinterested a fashion as one could. Sanzo also noted that Hakkai was leaving some of the more lurid details out, and seemed to focus on the business end of things. (He also noticed that their encounter with Chin Yisou and the times Goku broke or removed his limiter were absent, or anything even remotely unkind about any of them.) Every so often, he would check to ensure Aka knew what he was talking about, and Aka would nod. Goku, however, was nodding in a different way, and after about forty minutes of Hakkai talking, he had fallen asleep, still upright. Aka's eyes began to droop as Hakkai began to drone on about the miles of desert they had traveled. His head finally dropped after over an hour of Hakkai's story. Hakkai stopped immediately in the middle of a sentence and watched Aka. His breathing was even, his eyes shut, his mouth only just hanging open.

"There," Hakkai smiled, satisfied, and turned to Sanzo. "A bedtime story for the ages, don't you agree?"

"I never imagined you could make the things we have gone through sound so dry," Sanzo replied, unfolding his legs and getting to his feet. "Shall I wake you if I spot trouble?"

"I'm not tired. Are you?" Sanzo shook his head, and Hakkai's eyes suddenly regained that malicious glint. "You have slept perhaps only a few hours more than our young escort. It would be wise for you to try and close your eyes as well. Or perhaps you cannot sleep for another reason?" Sanzo gritted his teeth in annoyance, but Hakkai knew he had him pegged. Sanzo tried to ignore him, but his eyes were drilling a hole through his chest. "I miss him too."

"I don't know who you mean."

"You can't honestly think I'll believe you're that obtuse," Hakkai replied sharply, and he leaned closer to Sanzo. Sanzo shrugged. "I tell you, again and again, that you don't need to hide things from me. You realize that I am entirely aware of his activities, even those he chooses not to detail to me." Sanzo felt his heart jolt, and he gave Hakkai the iciest glare he could muster. Hakkai giggled nervously. "And I assure you, he details incredibly little. In fact, he only tells me if I see what few signs are left- if I should need to heal him, he usually asks me to leave things like bite marks and small bruises, saying that they're 'souvenirs.' I simply fill in the blanks as necessary." Sanzo's nostrils flared as he glared at Hakkai, but Hakkai continued, "All I'm trying to say is that I'm not all that interested in his intimate life, and whatever you two do when Goku and I aren't around or Gojyo leaves the water running in the bath for more than five minutes is none of my- I'll thank you not to hit me." Hakkai held up one hand as Sanzo whipped the fan back behind his head. "I'm only trying to say, I don't mind. And if it might relieve your soul to vent your frustrations to a discreet companion, I can oblige."

"My soul needs no relief," Sanzo grunted in retort. "Go to sleep."

"We're friends, you know, no matter what you say- or what you don't say. As much as you resist attachment, you can't forever swallow your pain in hopes that it will simply be alleviated eventually. Your pain is your own, and you shouldn't wallow in it or obsess on it, but unless you can release that tension, you will struggle to move forward." Sanzo said nothing, instead reaching for his cigarette box and pulling one out. Hakkai continued, "I fear your aim may worsen if your mind is under stress like this."

"My mind is stressed because you are pestering me. Aren't you at all worried about that boy?" Sanzo nodded towards Aka. Aka's body had gradually collapsed into a more natural sleeping state; he'd slumped onto his side, still curled up. Hakkai shrugged.

"He's asleep, and that's all I asked of him."

"Does nothing about his behavior irk you?"

"Much about him irks me, Sanzo. But the fact remains that he is still just a boy. Until there is more clear evidence than he is any more than what he says he is, I am willing to let his eccentricities slide." Hakkai let a sly smile show. "It's strange. He reminds me of you, the way he pushes everything out. I wonder if he has always been like that. My, perhaps your own boys will be like that someday."

"If I pretend go to sleep, will you shut up?" Sanzo mashed his cigarette into the dry ground beside him and threw himself onto his back without waiting for Hakkai to answer. Hakkai chuckled, and Sanzo silently swore out his frustrations through his eyes focused on the starless, dark gray sky. Boredom alone allowed his eyes to close.

Hakkai smiled to himself and whistled some silly, unrecognizable song back at the sudden gusts of wind, his only company the dark night around them. The darkness seemed to close in around the party, grasping at the straws Hakkai was slowly gathering. He hadn't lied to Sanzo- he was still watching Aka, even if he was nothing but a lost child.

Even if there was nothing but darkness to be found.

* * *

**End Notes:** I did get on a big kick this week, got a lot of the late story stuff written in my little notebook. The bad news is, I need a new notebook. Stupid notebook, all full of ideas and stuff. Hopefully, I won't have to worry about delaying posting new chapters. If there is a possibility of delay, I will be certain to let you all know.

Or... you could just send me enough love that it powers me up like some sort of weird fanfiction Spirit Bomb. All the same to me!

Liked it? Review!

Hated it? Review and tell me how to fix it!

Confused? Review and I can explain!

Questions for me to answer? Review and I will!

What did I bugger up this week? Review and let me know!

Predictions? Review! (I want to know what you think will happen!)

Anything? Review please!

Nothing? Review anyway!

Until next week!


	7. In and Out

**King Rat, No Mercy**

**Author Comments:** I warned you all this would happen: today's chapter is longer than usual! (Few extra pages, but I couldn't find a clean break to shorten it up.)

I do hope everyone is able to mostly keep track of the flashbacks and flash-forwards, as I have tried to pretty clearly delineate scene changes and the such. If I need to clarify anything, just let me know and I'll dive right back in and fix it! (Though if it's a little bit disorienting, then I guess you know how our poor main character feels.)

RodiSquall- Actually, that one was intentional. As in, exiting through. As for TB- checked WebMD, and that mostly matches his symptoms, but it seems to take a little longer than a few days to do what it's done to Ryuji. Don't worry, I know what he has! (At least I would hope I do.) Also, totally drew Nezuoh a membership card for the "Anachronistic China Sadist's Club" because that is hilarious to me.

I would also like to take this time to thank all of you readers and reviewers! I do appreciate your patronage, and I hope you're enjoying the story as much as I'm enjoying telling it.

**Disclaimer:** Original characters are mine. Original text is mine. Anything you recognize from the series is definitely not mine. (Oh, and the nursery rhyme which will appear in the chapter? Not mine. More in the end notes.)

* * *

**7: In and Out**

_The worms crawl in and the worms crawl out...  
__The worms crawl in and the worms crawl out..._

Gojyo could hear the words being repeated incessantly from somewhere in the corners of his mind, or at least he thought he did. He was almost certain that was what they were saying, at least in part. He had only made out the first half: "The worms crawl in and the worms crawl out." It seemed to fade as he drifted into deeper dreaming. Instead, he began to hear other voices:

"Aka is a devil. He's always doing something wrong."

"Ryuji is perfect. He's so proper and innocent. Not like his awful brother."

"If Ryuji has ever done something wrong, it's at that heretic child's suggestion."

"Those two can't possibly be brothers. A taboo brat born beside a golden child like that?"

Gojyo couldn't fathom where these voices were coming from, but they were accompanied with feelings of combined confusion and rage. He didn't know where those had come from either- the last thing he remembered, he was aggressively shadowboxing against the wall as a follow-up to a long round of push-ups and a complete failure at crunches, until his head became both incredibly light and too heavy for him to hold up. "Ah," he thought to himself, "I passed out. I'm dreaming. I'll just open my eyes and wake up."

He blinked into bright light again, but realized quickly that he was not in his own mind. The first indication was that he was outside, under a blue sky and in a world that looked warped. He still couldn't place what was wrong with the appearance of the world- the people that surrounded him looked normal, their bald heads shining in the sunlight, and the autumn-brown trees swaying in the wind. He quickly determined that he was in a courtyard in a temple, but it was not one he recognized. All told, it was a place and a situation he didn't know. The second detail that told him he was not in his own mind was that a ten-year-old boy was running at him across the sandy lot with a staff raised, and he was almost entirely sure this was not something that ordinarily happened to him. He found a staff in his hand as well, and he held it out firmly to block the other boy's advance. He rebuked the other boy, causing him to stumble back, and swung low to hit him in the gut. This knocked his assailant onto his back, but he laughed and jumped back to his feet.

"Ow, bro, you're too rough!" Aka half-laughed, half-whined, but he still rushed at him again. They blocked and parried a few of each other's blows, but Ryuji dropped his guard for a moment and Aka managed to hit him in the side of the head. Ryuji fell back, holding one hand out to signal to Aka to give him a moment to regain his stance, but one of the monks- who Gojyo realized had been watching them- stepped in and grabbed Aka by the ear.

"You little brat!" He yanked Aka's ear hard. "That's enough for you. Go to your chores." He let go of Aka. Aka scowled defiantly, but he dropped his staff and left the sand lot. Ryuji dropped his staff as well, but the monk suddenly looked apologetic. "Oh, Ryuji, you don't have to go." Ryuji ignored him, and followed Aka as he walked down the wooden walkway towards the main part of the monastery.

"Are you hurt?" He asked. Aka grunted, but looked back at him with somber eyes.

"Are you?"

"Nah, you didn't hit me that hard."

"Then why don't you go back and practice some more? They didn't tell you to leave. You're still better than me anyway."

"Because it's no fun without you." Ryuji began to walk heel-to-toe balanced on the edge of the walkway. They passed a large apple tree- though the leaves already looked brown and the apples looked brown and yellow, Ryuji still jumped to pluck down two apples.

"Ah- you know we're not supposed to take those," Aka protested weakly, but he still took the light yellow apple Ryuji gave him.

"They'll rot on the ground otherwise. Will they really miss two apples?" He sat down, hanging his knees off the walkway and cleaned his darker yellow apple on the plain muslin robe he wore. Aka followed suit, and they began to munch on their apples. It gave Gojyo a chance to look closer at Aka from the corners of Ryuji's eyes. He was a little smaller than Ryuji, perhaps a few centimeters shorter, but it wasn't much. He looked like a normal boy, though, with dark hair and eyes. They ate quickly and hid the cores under the walkway, and picked up brooms from a bin on the corner. They started at opposite sides of the walk, and began to sweep in tandem.

As they swept the walk clear of leaves and dirt, two other monks passed them on their way to the main sanctuary. Ryuji could distinctly hear them muttering to one another:

"Seems a shame that poor Ryuji feels obligated to spend time with his... unfortunate sibling."

"I can hardly stand the sight of that boy."

Aka trembled, but said nothing and kept sweeping. Gojyo felt Ryuji's fists shake as he gripped the broom, and he swung the broom a bit too fast and too hard. He accidentally pushed a pot off the walkway, and his heart raced. Another monk poked his head around the corner, and marched directly to Aka.

"Why did you do that?" He demanded, prodding his finger into Aka's chest. "Isn't it enough that we feed and clothe you, but you break things and expect us to-"

"Sir, it was my mistake," Ryuji interrupted in a subdued, ashamed mumble. "The broom slipped." The monk paused in his rebuke of Aka, who trembled in place like a leaf in late winter, and turned a somewhat more forgiving gaze to Ryuji.

"Oh. I see. I'm sure you meant no ill will. Hold out your hand." Ryuji did so, exposing his right palm, and the monk swatted him across the wrist. "Clean it up and all is forgiven." The monk stalked off without another word, tossing one last dirty look at Aka as he vanished around the corner. Ryuji began to pick up the clay shards, but Aka sank to his knees and folded his arms around his head.

"I can't take it," he whispered. "How can you do what they say?"

"Because I'm too angry to do anything else," Ryuji mumbled. He threw the shards into another pot, and shook his head. "I just try to channel my anger into other things. I can't motivate myself if I'm not angry, if they don't keep making me angry."

"You're getting too used to it. You're too used to them insulting me. It wasn't this bad when the elder was alive," Aka mumbled, shaking his head and tugging at his hair. "At least then, if he heard them, he would say something. Nobody else defends me, and you're too scared to." He began to sniffle, and rubbed at his eyes. "They treat me like trash, and they can't even look at you on your own without remembering that we were attached."

"I've started wondering about that, y'know." Ryuji crouched down by Aka and rubbed his eyes with his sleeve. "I realized why they're so unkind to us."

"What's that?" Aka rubbed his eyes, as Ryuji got onto his knees and leaned close to him.

"They don't see us with clear eyes." Ryuji smiled and shook his head. "They don't see us the way we really are. They always talk about the love of the Gods, how pure it is, how it's unclouded for all, but they can't show it themselves because they're not pure themselves. They're so corrupt that they can't even see that we're the same, so they treat us differently." He lowered his voice even further. "They don't love us. They can't. Not the way kids in the village are loved. I don't even think the elder really loved us. Don't you think we deserve that?"

"I g-guess."

"You guess? Come on, think about it!" Ryuji folded his arms, as Aka coalesced into a wiggling lump hunched around his folded legs. "Everyone is loved by someone. The kids in the village, with their parents and stuff, they're not sad or angry all the time. They probably don't feel miserable all the time. They're loved, right?"

"But, I love you-" Aka started.

"I love you too, but shouldn't there be someone who will love both of us?" Ryuji fluffed Aka's hair and tilted his head down to look into his eyes. "I thought and thought, and I realized- it's the love of the Gods they're talking about, right? That can lead to enlightenment. Won't love take us a little closer to happiness? Maybe we should ask the Merciful Goddess for someone to love us."

"I already do," Aka mumbled, as he stood up and took his broom again. "I pray for that already." He moved to start sweeping again, but Ryuji jumped up and grabbed him by his shoulders.

"Not just prayers! I say we make a pilgrimage to the Fragrant Mountain. Then, we can ask her ourselves."

"No, we can't just do that. We can't ask for a miracle."

"Love's not a miracle, it happens every day!" Ryuji smiled brightly, though he had started to sound frustrated.

"But still, someone who could love me..." Aka shook his head. Gojyo's heart sank- he knew Aka's feelings so well, even though he couldn't see why Aka so doubted that he was able to be loved.

"We could always offer something in exchange. We could see if she'll make us her servants or something. Then, she could find us a family, or even just a mother or father. One would be enough."

"Even Heaven will reject a taboo like me," Aka muttered, turning away. Ryuji finally dropped his smile completely- Gojyo felt his lips turn downwards into an ugly grimace. He grabbed Aka by the shoulder again, whirled him around, and cuffed him across the top of the head.

"Don't you want a family? Don't you want to be happy? We're not going to find happiness here!" Ryuji clenched his fists. Gojyo knew he would be doing the same if only he could. "Listen to me- I'm your brother, aren't I? If I'm your brother, then I'm as taboo as you are. You're as taboo as I am. Tell me, am I taboo?"

"N-no, but-"

"Do you want to stay here and get kicked around for the rest of our lives, or do you want to try?" Ryuji folded his arms and scowled. Aka looked into his eyes, and cracked a small smile.

"I guess it'd be no better than staying here. Who knows?" Aka shuffled his feet. "Maybe the Goddess Kannon can find someone who will love me."

The next thing Gojyo knew, it was late in the night. The monks were asleep across the floor of their dormitory, but Ryuji lay awake. He reached for Aka, and Aka grabbed his wrist. The two sat up and moved quickly and quietly through the building. They took up what few belongings they had, a water skin and a pouch of rice from the kitchen, a few choice apples from the tree, and smuggled it all into a borrowed pack. They strapped their staffs to their backs and stole out the front gate like moths in the wind. Hand in hand, with their destination clear but their heading unknown, they left the monastery far behind...

* * *

Gojyo did not wake in the same place in which he fell asleep. When he finally was able to open his eyes properly, he was in a fairly familiar dimly-lit room, stretched out across a cot. Four candles flickered around the room, but the door was open just a crack, and the light crawling across the floor was blocked by a lean figure in tight pants. Gojyo's heart raced- Sanzo! He jumped to his feet and rushed towards the door, but his head spun and he sunk to his knees with dizziness. His stomach was throbbing against his skin, and he could feel now how distended it was. It rumbled angrily, reminding him that it was still empty. He pushed himself to his feet, and stumbled towards the doorway, but as he woke up and his mind steadied, he realized that it couldn't possibly be Sanzo. Still, the open door was tempting. He moved towards the door a third time, and the man in front of it moved, allowing him to see into the hallway. His heart plummeted through his chest- the men in the hallway were carrying a limp body covered in a black sheet through the corridor. The face was only partially covered, and Gojyo recognized brown hair dripping blood, and blood coating a golden diadem. Sanzo slammed the door shut, turning to Gojyo with sympathetic eyes.

"You don't need to see that," he said somberly. "It seems they found the others."

"No, no, no," Gojyo muttered, shaking his head. "This isn't real. This isn't real. You're not real. I know you're not real."

"I'm here, aren't I? Doesn't that make me real?" Sanzo folded his arms. He was wearing the same black over-shirt as he had the last time Gojyo had seen him. Gojyo knew he'd seen that shirt before somewhere- it was a haori that Sanzo had borrowed from Hakkai once when trying to appear incognito. Gojyo vaguely remembered thinking it had suited him, but he wondered where he had gotten it. It didn't change the facts, and even though Gojyo's head was reeling, he had to push back against him.

"If you're real, give me a cigarette. I know you've got a pack."

"What, and go back to that cell smelling like death? That kid in the cell beside you is sick, right?" The eerie smile crept back onto Sanzo's face, and Gojyo felt the hair on the back of his neck stick up.

"You bastard. You're not Sanzo." He began to wring a tendril of his hair in his hand. "I know you're not. I'd rather rot in that cell than sit here with you."

"At this point, I think I'd let you," a familiar voice painted with bitterness replied from the corner. Gojyo turned, and saw Hakkai leaned against the wall. His sleeves had been shredded off, and his face was bruised. His jaw fell.

"Dude- you're alive-"

"Of course I'm alive, you imbecile!" Hakkai's eyes were fierce and full of hatred. He advanced on Gojyo, fists clenched.

"Hakkai, what the hell?" Gojyo furrowed his brow. He'd never seen this look on Hakkai's face, or if he had, it had never been for him.

"Goku is dead!" Hakkai growled, throwing his hands out. "They attacked us, you fool. They came out of the darkness like snakes and ate us whole! But I had my wits about me enough to surrender. And here you've been, safe and sound. Have you even tried to come and find us?"

"I've been locked up!" Gojyo replied, reaching for Hakkai. Hakkai smacked his arm away.

"Did you even try to escape? Have you even looked for a way out?" He clenched his fists. "I... I don't even know what to say to you. I thought we were friends!"

"H-Hakkai-" Gojyo felt his heart twist. "I... I tried-"

"You bastard," Hakkai shook his head. "I don't care anymore. It's all your fault, you realize." He turned to face Gojyo again, this time wearing a wicked, menacing smile. Gojyo knew he'd seen that evil smirk somewhere before, but it didn't change the fact that it was Hakkai giving it to him.

"Wh-what?" He felt his bones go cold, his nerve entirely gone.

"It's all your fault. It's your fault Goku's dead. It's your fault we're trapped down here with a thousand angry hanyou. You were too selfish to forget about that stupid seal. You were curious about why something affected you and hurt you, and you couldn't just leave well enough alone!" Hakkai's words, falling from those cruelly smiling lips, pierced Gojyo in the heart. Hakkai turned away from him. "I've repaid my debt to you. I owe you nothing anymore. I've agreed to cooperate with the King in order to get myself and Sanzo free. Whatever he wants to do with you is his business. I no longer care." With that, Hakkai stormed towards the door, and yanked on it- it was, however, locked. He pounded hard on the door, and it swung open for him and shut as soon as he emerged into the hallway. Gojyo was frozen in place. Sanzo finally emerged from the shadow of the corner he'd backed into, and Gojyo glared at him.

"Son of a bitch. You... did you manipulate him to say that?"

"No, that was quite genuine, I assure you. You insist I'm an illusion, though I'll remind you that I'm real, but your friends are- or were- in very real danger out there." Sanzo folded his arms. "And he is right, of course- it is your fault. Aren't you the one that got them dragged into the seal?" He shook his head, glowering down at Gojyo. "Idiot."

"Shut up!" Gojyo snapped, grabbing his forehead. "This can't be real. This is a dream. I want to wake up." He turned his fierce gaze onto Sanzo. "This is all your fault!" He launched himself at Sanzo, but as soon as he got close, he saw Sanzo's eyes flare red for a split second, and he suddenly felt incredibly dizzy. Sanzo looked unamused as Gojyo stumbled backwards and crumbled onto his knees.

"What did I ever do? I had a mission to complete, and it was my aim to complete it. You were the one who got in my way in the first place." He folded his arms, his pale fingers brushing the black silk sleeves of his shirt. "You stood in front of me and made demands of me, like I owed you. But I'm always willing to oblige." He gesticulated vaguely and paced back and forth in front of him. "You wanted sex, and I gave it to you. You wanted more, and I let you have it. And then you insist that you always do what I want? Hypocrite." He glowered at Gojyo again. "We renegotiated the terms of our relationship, I destroyed our first contract, but you're never going to be satisfied, are you?"

"What the hell do you mean, we renegotiated? I never agreed to a goddamn thing. We never talked about anything like that!" Gojyo muttered in disbelief. His head was spinning, and he couldn't think straight- Goku was dead- Hakkai hated him- and Sanzo still wanted to taunt him?

"We don't have to talk. It's that simple- I'll have sex with you, and you still won't talk to anyone about it. You may not hide it as fiercely, but really, it's exactly the same as it was." Sanzo suddenly smirked. "It really is just the same, isn't it? The only difference is that we have to stay together now. We're trapped together by two whining brats."

"And how is that my fault?!" Gojyo tried to stand up again, but he stumbled back down. He hadn't realized just how dizzy he was. Something smelled wrong, and it was making him feel physically weak.

"You wanted to return the favor to me. I never asked for that, but you wanted it, and a scant few weeks later, you tell us the Goddess made you to be with child. It might take water to grow rice, but there's no seed without soil." Sanzo's eyes were completely cold, though he was still wearing that ugly smile. Gojyo ground his teeth together, his chest aching, but he grounded himself and tried to talk back.

"If you hate them so much, then why didn't you just abandon them with me?"

"You made me feel guilty. I have a heart too, you know, I just never intended to let you near it." Sanzo shook his head and turned away.

"You bastard." Gojyo's lips curled, but he gritted his teeth. "No, no, I won't let you trick me. You're not real. Goku's not dead, he's too strong for that. Hakkai would never turn his back on me."

"And how do you know any of that?" Sanzo's smirk widened as he turned back around. "I'm not telling you anything you don't know already. I've told you, I'm the Sanzo you see every day. But what if I were the Sanzo you dream of?" He reached for Gojyo's face, but Gojyo grabbed his wrist and clamped down on his bones. His skin felt hot, he thought smoke may as well have been pouring from his ears.

"Tell me the truth about my friends. Are they alive? I want to know, damn you," Gojyo said in a deceptively calm voice, though anyone who knew anything about body language could tell that there was a tidal wave of rage hidden behind those words.

"You know the truth. Come now, don't be so hot-and-cold with me," Sanzo replied with the same wicked smirk, and he yanked his hand away from Gojyo. "Let me touch you. I'll make all your troubles go away."

"You mean if I let you touch me, you'll turn the clock back to before I got to this godforsaken place and make everything the way it was before? I don't think even you have that kind of power." Gojyo folded his arms tight and lowered his head. "Otherwise, just give me that smelly stuff that you used to knock me out last time. I don't want to look at you anymore." He thought for a moment. "Wait." He looked back up at Sanzo, who already had the bottle in his hand. "I'm hungry. I'm starving, actually. I'll let you touch me if you'll find me something to eat." His insides squirmed; he couldn't stand the thought of being reduced to begging the bastard he knew existed behind the mask of Sanzo, but something inside him was screaming for food. Sanzo looked amused.

"Hunger? Is that so? If I recall, you had little interest in food the last time life grew within you..." He folded his arms and rubbed his chin, and everything in Gojyo's head screamed out klaxons.

"What did you just say?!" Gojyo growled, jumping back to his feet. He made a second run at Sanzo, but the bottle in his hand was suddenly open and directly under his nose. Gojyo stumbled back, jaw agape with surprise and senses blurred, but Sanzo quickly poured some of the liquid onto his lips. The taste, ineffable but bitter, was enough to knock him onto his backside in drowsiness, and he fell back onto the floor before he could even realize he was falling asleep.

* * *

**(Suggested Track: "Turn Loose the Mermaids," Nightwish)**

He opened his eyes again to blue-gray skies and dark eyes directly over his. His instinct was to recoil, but when he didn't, he realized he was in Ryuji's head again. He quickly recognized Aka, though his face was thinner and his voice deeper. Aka was smiling like the child he was, eyes alight with eagerness.

"Are you awake, brother?" He asked, beaming. Ryuji sat up slowly, shaking sand from his hair and fixing Aka with a cold stare. He swatted Aka across the top of his head.

"I wasn't," he grumbled. Aka smacked Ryuji back.

"I woke you up for a reason, you idiot! Look." Aka pointed to the still-dim horizon. Ryuji squinted westward to see a great mountain rising from the desert, its peak obscured by the clouds.

"It's a mountain." He pursed his lips. "Was that... was that there last night?"

"Nope." The bright smile returned to Aka's face. Ryuji mirrored it.

"We... we must have made it. It took us a year, but we've made it." He jumped to his feet. "Come on, brother. Let's have breakfast!"

He grabbed his staff from his pack, Aka did the same, and both jumped backwards from each other. Aka held his staff, left hand over right, and the two launched themselves at each other. They bashed and swung at each other, parrying and blocking in circles, using their staffs as ballast to kick off the ground at one another until Ryuji finally landed a solid hit on Aka's shoulder. Aka fell to the ground, dropped his staff, and held his hands up.

"You always win," he griped with a wide smile, as Ryuji caught his breath.

"I work for it," he panted, and offered Aka his smile in return. Sated from their fight but with no food in their pack to silence their growling stomachs, the twins took up their bundles and hobbled their way towards the strange mountain.

At the foot of the mountain was a great white gate, an archway that looked like it was made of porcelain or bone, and the first step of a winding path of stairs. The pair looked at each other. Aka smirked, and suggested, "Race you to the top?" They set off in a run.

Time lost meaning. Gojyo couldn't even imagine how long the two climbed. They didn't stop, not to breathe, not to rest, they didn't pause even for a second, as though they feared a moment's hesitation might drop them from their path, plummeting them back to the dry, empty world below. And yet, it didn't. They reached the top to find a golden gate, shining like the sun itself, with two men holding crossed halberds before the opening. Aka looked to Ryuji, and Ryuji braced himself and approached slowly. He bowed, and spoke in timid timbre:

"If you'll allow us, sirs, we've come to seek the goddess Kannon's mercy. We are but two unfortunate brothers. May we please pass?" Aka came to his side and took his right hand in his left, bowing as well. The two heralds considered them, looking between them. They glanced at one another, then to the twins.

"All are worthy of mercy," one said kindly, and they lifted their blades. Aka squeezed Ryuji's hand, and Ryuji realized that Aka had started crying.

"Don't do that, no!" Ryuji laughed weakly, rubbing Aka's eyes for him. "We made it. They're letting us in."

"Only one thing-" the herald interrupted passively. "We'll just need you to leave your weapons."

"Take them," Aka insisted, and he tore his staff from his back and threw it back down the stairs. Ryuji put his staff aside.

"We won't need them here," Ryuji added. They clenched their hands tight together, and walked into Heaven.

Gojyo could tell that Ryuji's mind was in a mad blur as they walked down the streets of Heaven. It seemed like a place of a thousand palaces, the streets filled with the hustle and bustle of the gods' servants, of soldiers in white robes and simple armor, of pleasant merchants and priests. It was crowded, to Gojyo's imagination; he'd somehow thought it would have been harder to get in. Still, Ryuji's mind was awash with questions- 'What will happen now? Where will we go? What have we gained?' Suspicious eyes still were cast on both dirty, thin brothers, full of mistrust. Aka didn't seem to notice or mind, but Ryuji held tight to him, and the two meandered their way through the peaceful realm. Fate itself seemed to guide their steps to a great house with a vast garden, and they knew, from the smell of flowers and from the shoes left at the doorway, that it had to belong to Kanzeon Bosatsu. They entered through the open archway.

No guards stood at the door, though a manservant (Gojyo was certain he had a name, but he didn't know it) waved them forward. "Come forth! You two are expected!" He smiled warmly and slid the door open. They saw her at the far end of the room, surrounded by flowers and paper scrolls. Gojyo knew the face of the Merciful Goddess, as she pressed her pen to her lips and held the paper she wrote on up to the light. The boys started towards her in a walk, but even their soft footsteps echoed on the tatami mats, and she looked up at them with a warm, though curious smile. They broke into a run and dropped down onto their knees three meters away from her, throwing themselves at the ground on bent knee and elbow, their faces on the floor.

They started together: "Gracious Lady Kanzeon Bosatsu, we-"

In a stuttering jumble, the twins recounted their tale. They took turns, recalling their orphanhood, their lifetime of bullying, their deep desire for someone to genuinely want them, and all the rest came spilling from their quivering lips at Kanzeon Bosatsu's feet. She listened patiently, offering only kind smiles and nods for them to continue whenever one paused.

"-please, Lady Kannon," Aka concluded tearfully, "We're strong and brave, we'll do anything you ask of us if you'll only find someone who can love both of us." Kanzeon Bosatsu took a moment to think as Aka rubbed his eyes dry again, and Ryuji managed to turn his nose up from the mat to look at her. She slowly rose to her feet, took a few pensive steps towards them, then crouched to embrace them both.

"Darling boys, brave little warriors, I'm so glad you came," she murmured, and rubbed their backs to soothe them. "I promise you now, I will find a place for you. I would take you in myself were I only allowed." She hugged them tight. "Just give me a little time to make arrangements, and I'll find you a place where the two of you will be wanted and loved."

Aka and Ryuji both broke into tears of joy, pressing their faces into her thighs. She laughed softly, rubbing their heads. "There, there now..."

Gojyo's mind, however, soon found itself somewhere considerably different. He could feel himself being pulled away from Ryuji like a bone being stripped out, and his own name was ringing in his ears...

* * *

**(Suggested Track: "The Tain, Pt. 2" by The Decemberists. 2:04-4:58. In the video, 2:18-5:12)**

"-Gojyo! Mister Gojyo! Mister Gojyo!" Ryuji's yelping voice finally shattered the seeming dream that Gojyo had been floating through, and Gojyo instantly snapped to attention. Ryuji was pounding his fists on the wall adjoining their cells, screaming his name. His voice ripped through the air like the rushing winds. He stopped only for a second as a coughing fit struck him, and Gojyo heard him collapse. Gojyo rushed to the gap in the wall, and saw Ryuji down on his hands and knees, vomiting something that looked and smelled like blood. Tears washed the red from around his lips, his cheeks and eyes red from crying.

"Calm down, you're making yourself sicker," Gojyo murmured, in the most comforting voice he could muster as he himself tried not to retch himself.

"Mister Gojyo, I heard them, I heard them," he whimpered, his whole body caught in a tremor. "I heard what they said, and I'm scared..."

"Calm down. Breathe. Please, just tell me what it is." Gojyo pushed all of his worries from his mind, tried to forget that Hakkai hated him, tried to forget that Goku was dead. Ryuji needed him more than he needed comfort.

"The thing they've been repeating, the thing I've been hearing." Ryuji took a few slow, ragged breaths. He finally took a long, deep breath, and managed to repeat it:

"The worms crawl in and the worms crawl out,  
In your belly and out of your mouth."

Gojyo didn't know what to say. Everything hit him like a punch in the gut, and he fell back against the wall.

"Fuck." He balled his fist and pounded it back into the solid stones. "What the fuck does that even mean?!" He rested his open palm on his round stomach, and felt his hands begin to shake. "Dirty rat bastard- what the fuck are you trying to do?!"

"I don't know." Ryuji was whimpering again, voice quavering. "But I'm scared."

"Me too, kid," Gojyo muttered. Ryuji curled up tighter, his whole body twitching and shuddering as he started to cough again. Something twisted inside of him, something alien and unpleasant, and his hopes began to gasp their swan songs.

* * *

**End Notes:** _The worms crawl in, the worms crawl out/The worms play pinochle on your snout_

That is the nursery rhyme I mentioned in the disclaimer, and it's only a small part of it. It comes from a folk song known, charmingly, as "The Hearse Song." Look it up, torment your younger friends and relatives. The version I heard as a child, at least as I remember, went as follows:

_The worms crawl in and the worms crawl out/In your nose and out your mouth_

And this creeped me right the fuck out when I was eight. And eighteen. And to the present.

On a lighter note, I usually don't use Japanese terms in my fiction, but in my head, I replace Sanzo's use of the phrase "hot-and-cold" with "tsundere," so the sentence would read something more like, "Come now, don't be such a tsundere with me." I get a terrible kick out of imagining Tsundere!Gojyo. I'm sure Nezuoh feels the exact same way and pictures Gojyo something like this: "(blush blush blush) It's not like I wanna have your babies or anything." (insert immature giggling here.)

With that said, I'm hoping to get some reaction out of this chapter. After all, shit is only going to get worse.

Comments? Questions? Emotional whiplash? Review.  
Liked it? Hated it? Review harder!  
Predictions? Suggestions? Review!  
Did I fuck it up again? Review!  
Anything? Review! Nothing? Review harder!

Next week? You're going to either love or hate next week's chapter. Until then!


	8. Please Stop

**King Rat, No Mercy**

**Author's Notes:** Here we are again! Clear your afternoons, this is another long one! It does also have one of my favorite scenes, and I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoy writing it.

Review responses!

Dragon77- "Get better," huh? Get better, get better... nope, not in my vocabulary! (Don't worry, I generally don't do complete downer endings. Even a "tragedy" I wrote in another fandom had an uplifting ending.)

RodiSquall- Eesh! Uh, I'm sorry about your lunch! I'll be sure to put bucket warnings at the beginning of the chapter when things get nasty again. And yes, I am evil. Incredibly so. However, only to fictional characters. Without a pen in my hand, I am a cookie-baking, apron-wearing, extraordinarily nice housewife-y homebody. You know what they say... always the quiet ones.

WARNING: Hemophobes beware, you're in for a phobic episode! Also, bucket warning towards the end of the chapter. Also, brace necks for mood whiplash.

Disclaimer: Ryuji and Aka are mine, the situation is mine. The rest belongs to Kazuya Minekura, and if she ever sees this, I am so sorry.

* * *

**8: Please Stop**

Ryuji and Gojyo had sat silent on opposite walls of their cells, staring at one another through the gap for the rest of the night, at least as far as Gojyo could remember. He had, once he'd regained his senses, found a bowl of mush and a pitcher of water beside the door with a cracked spoon in it, and ate and drank without a second thought. The porridge tasted terrible, like sake without the refreshing sting of alcohol, but it was sustenance enough to keep his growling stomach silent. Only an hour later, the same sated feeling began to make him nauseous, but he managed to keep from regurgitating if only out of the desperate desire to not be seen as sick by Ryuji. Ryuji was a mess, but the guards had been generous enough to leave him a basin of water, and he used it to clean the blood from his hair and off the front of his tattered robe.

"It's days like this I'm grateful for the drowning torture," he'd muttered as he wiped what he could off of himself. Some of his skin seemed to have been permanently stained, as Gojyo couldn't stop seeing red around his lips. "It's the closest I ever get to bathing anymore."

"You're tellin' me, kid," Gojyo retorted, but he couldn't bring himself to go any further.

And they were silent again. The only noise was the rattling wind, drowning out any thoughts he might have had. Gojyo had tried to look out of the window again, jumping up and down to try and see, but it made his stretched, round middle shake and slosh, which in turn made him nauseous again. He wished, hope upon hope, that he could see his friends, or know where they were, if they were alive- and yet, something in his head reminded him, he had seen them. He didn't want to believe it was true, he didn't want to, especially since he knew that King Rat could create illusions- he'd created a perfect mirror of Sanzo, hadn't he? But how could he have been all three at once? It didn't make sense. He didn't want to admit that it might have been true, but there seemed no alternative. He tried to push it out of his mind, but there still lay something more sinister beneath it.

_The worms crawl in and the worms crawl out  
__In your belly and out of your mouth_

Gojyo did not like the eerie rhyme Ryuji had been hearing, and this was an understatement of the highest caliber. Since Ryuji had managed to hear and repeat the complete couplet, Gojyo had begun either hearing it or imagining hearing it. It made the skin on his arms prick up, it made his heart feel cold. He didn't know who was saying it, but he wanted to give them a solid kick in the crotch. He knew it wouldn't change the facts, but it sure as hell would have made him feel better.

As the sun began to rise again, orange and oblong, Ryuji seemed to finally gather his thoughts. "Mister Gojyo, I'm... I'm sorry."

"What the hell are you apologizing for, kid? And quit callin' me Mister." Gojyo got to his feet and began to pace around the cell again.

"I'll stop calling you Mister when you stop calling me kid. I only ever let one person call me that, and it's not you." Ryuji sighed. "And I'm sorry for making you worry about me."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Gojyo frowned at the wall like he could see Ryuji through the stones.

"I mean, I know you have enough things to worry about as it is without worrying about me, what they're doing to me." Gojyo felt a pang of sadness to match Ryuji's sorrow. He'd started to become accustomed and attuned to how expressive Ryuji's timbre was. It was unlike the way his friends usually spoke; Goku almost always sounded happy, Hakkai always wore a smile, Sanzo rarely showed emotion at all, but Ryuji hid nothing. He could hear when he smiled, and could tell when he was enraged, but listening to him sounding this utterly dejected stung. "You should be more worried about you."

"I can't do that. You know that."

"Why not?" Ryuji asked, sounding genuinely surprised.

"Well, duh," Gojyo chuckled.

"Duh, what?" Ryuji retorted.

Gojyo didn't have an answer. He didn't have an honest answer, or at least he thought he didn't. He considered it for a moment- why was he so worried about Ryuji? It couldn't have had anything to do with the fact that he was pretty sure he'd been living in the kid's head whenever he closed his eyes, that couldn't be it. Finally, he found a decent answer: "You remind me of someone I know. Kind of."

"Oh. You know I'm not him, right?" Ryuji sounded depressed again.

"I know. But this guy? I mean, back when I was at a low point, this guy was the one who made me feel human again." Gojyo reached into his pocket once again, searching for a cigarette. He failed to find one. His memory felt distant, but he recalled the last time he and Sanzo had a moment alone together. They did what they always did, but even in the afterglow, they didn't talk, they smoked. "On the outside? I've got a pretty bad tobacco habit. Settles me down when I feel restless. But the weird thing is, I quit. My other friend made me quit cold turkey for about eight months, only had maybe six over the whole ordeal when I could sneak one. At the end of it, I'd actually stopped craving 'em. Still liked the smell, but I didn't want 'em anymore. But this guy? He got me through quitting, but he got me hooked again." He chuckled softly to himself. "It's kinda how we communicate. We can't talk straight about anything serious, that's just not how we are, but between a couple'a cigarettes, we understand each other. And no matter how low I feel, that brings me up."

"I don't know what you're getting at; I don't smoke," Ryuji mumbled.

"No, but you've got the same serious face as him. And to be fair, kid, you've been making me feel a lot less like shit than I should. Besides, I'm fresh out of smokes." He patted his pockets down again. "I know I shouldn't unload on you like this, it ain't fair to you, but just having you around makes me feel a little better."

"No, I understand. It's better than being alone." Ryuji twiddled his thumbs anxiously. "But, it's still weird."

"What is?"

"It's just, you remind me of someone too. If only a little."

"Well, there's plenty of hanyou around here," Gojyo replied with only a hint of sarcasm.

"It's not just that. It's your smile. You remind me of someone who... someone who did love me." Ryuji's voice was suddenly muffled. He was quiet, then suddenly shouted, "Forget I said that! Forget that! You don't need to know that!"

"Kid-"

"Stop calling me that! Stop it!" Ryuji screeched. Gojyo crouched down- he could see Ryuji covering his ears. Blood had begun to drain from his mouth again, and tears began to flow with it. He coughed hard, blood spurting from his lips. Gojyo backed into the wall, completely silent, as Ryuji started to sob. "I'm sorry," he mumbled between coughs and cries. "I'm sorry."

Gojyo didn't know what to say to him. He couldn't fathom why Ryuji was suddenly in such pain, but he began to think about what he knew of Ryuji from what he was almost sure were his memories. Ryuji had wanted so badly to be loved, hadn't he? If someone did love him, what had happened? He couldn't imagine it. He couldn't think straight, everything was a blur, flying past him so quickly he couldn't keep up with it. Ryuji's voice dwindled to nothing as he cried himself back to sleep. It was enough to make him wonder- had he ever been loved?

He had thought Hakkai loved him, at least as a friend, but that wasn't really love, was it? Goku probably thought love was something delicious, maybe dipped in chocolate or with whipped cream on top. Sanzo? That was another matter entirely. Left alone in his mind, Gojyo finally had time to think about just what Sanzo's deal was with him. Hadn't the Sanzo he'd been seeing said they'd "renegotiated?" He wouldn't say he regretted his first contract with him, but it certainly hadn't been his wisest move at the time. And now, he and Sanzo had something together. Something that was not contracted, at least not on paper. Yes, they had sex with some regularity, and they occasionally talked about a little more than just the day's events, but he couldn't consider their arrangement a "couple." 'Don't couples do more than just screw?' he reasoned. 'Sanzo rarely talks anyway, let alone to me.' And yet, he wanted to keep doing it. Maybe, he wondered, there was part of him that expected more than that. Was that love? Or was that evidence of a lack thereof?

"No, no," he mumbled to himself. "He wants me to think that, he wants me to be afraid and doubt. I know the truth." Something in his mind told him that he was lying to himself, but he tried as hard as he could to ignore it. He glanced out the window once more, wishing he could know where his friends were, ask Hakkai for advice or even relieve some tension by teasing Goku. There was no such relief. He wasn't far behind Ryuji in falling asleep.

* * *

As he now found to be a constant when he dreamed, Gojyo found himself dropped into Ryuji's memories. Kanzeon Bosatsu had taken both Aka and Ryuji's hands and led them down the halls of her house, past her lush garden, towards a back part of her house. "Until I find you a proper place, you may stay with my nephew. He could use a bit of help, and the other gods will be upset if I've just got two little boys loitering about." Ryuji and Aka were still drying their eyes and mouths, though Ryuji kept trying to wipe Aka's eyes as well. "His offices are back here." The halls on this side of her home were lined with stacks of paperwork almost floor-to-ceiling: the universe's largest in-out box. She slid open a rice-paper door. "Konzen, I'm coming in."

Gojyo would have frowned, were he able. The name was familiar. The face was too, but Gojyo just couldn't place it. The man behind the desk, with his long blonde hair tied back in a pragmatic ponytail, he looked terribly exasperated by her entrance. "Milady, I've much work to do." Paperwork was stacked all around him as well, as he tried to file through piles of paperwork. Hundreds of thousands of files, books, and scrolls cluttered the bookshelves on his windowless walls. Kanzeon Bosatsu simply shook her head.

"Surely you can spare a moment." She folded her arms and smiled sternly. Konzen rested his chin on his tented fingers, glowering at her over his desk. "These are Ryuji and Aka. They're my little warriors, you see." She planted her hands atop their heads, and both boys blushed. "They made their way here to offer me their services personally, in exchange for something rather... complex."

"Complex? Didn't Tentei say no more 'special projects?' It generally causes more harm than good."

"Now, the last one wasn't so bad," she scolded. "Shan Tsai has been a loyal servant. The others merely don't want me becoming more popular. Tentei may not like it, but I can't stop doing my job because he- or any of the other gods- dislikes it. I am a goddess of children, after all."

"So you are," he conceded, though both Ryuji and Gojyo could tell he was unsatisfied but unwilling to argue. Kanzeon Bosatsu continued nonetheless.

"I don't intend to keep them- I can't, as you said. But I need you to help me find someone who can. They did offer me their services in exchange, so perhaps you could arrange for them to join the army." She smiled slyly. "I've heard that a good general is like a father to his men."

"Aren't they a bit young for that?"

"They'll grow. Besides, we are at peace and have been for some time." She rubbed their heads affectionately.

"I see where you're going with this," Konzen grumbled. "Leave the waifs here. I'll mind them so you don't get in trouble."

"You're too kind, Konzen." She patted their backs, pushing them forward. "Alright, boys, I've got some work to do. Stay with Konzen here, he'll keep you busy." Neither boy could find words, but turned around and embraced her tightly. Her bosom smelled of hyacinth and jasmine, and she chuckled and patted their backs with a soft palm. She turned to leave and closed the door behind her, and was gone like a noontide shadow. Konzen got to his feet and began to dig through one of the files on the bookshelf.

"I suppose I'll have to start with a records requisition. Ryuji and Aka, correct?" He glanced at the two. "Do you know the characters?" Both shook their heads. "Hmph. Never wrote your names before? I'll just use the most common ones, then." He took two scrolls and sat back at his desk. He began to scribble on both of them in turn. "Have you surnames?" Both shook their heads. "Age?"

"We're both eleven," Aka mumbled. Konzen wrote it down.

"Any living relatives?"

"Only each other," Ryuji answered. "We're brothers." Konzen looked up at this, and perused each of their faces.

"Is that so?" He looked skeptical, but Ryuji gritted his teeth.

"Hey, we look almost exactly alike!" He barked. "Our faces aren't that different!" Konzen didn't reply, continuing to study them. "We have the exact same eyes. His hair is darker. That's all. I don't care what anyone says."

"No, I see the resemblance," Konzen replied patiently. He made a note on another piece of paper, and Ryuji relaxed. His heart was still racing, but somehow, Konzen's acceptance was welcome. "You'll need to give me a few days to get everything together. I'll need the records on you, and doubtless Kanzeon will want to speak with the candidates... you'll be sleeping here, and I'll be putting you to work."

"So, we really can't-" Aka started to protest, but Ryuji grabbed his hand.

"This is Heaven, we should be grateful they're willing to help us at all," he whispered, and Aka slouched in shame.

"No, you really can't stay with Kanzeon Bosatsu," Konzen stated evenly in response to Aka's unfinished question, "because her position as a major deity disallows her from showing undue favoritism to mortals, with only a few exceptions." He continued to write, but explained, "Pilgrims, those in direct service of the gods, the like. You two are not pilgrims in a formal sense, nor are you priests. It's a matter of appearances."

"Somehow, I thought Heaven would be nicer than that," Ryuji mumbled. At this, Konzen put his palm over his face and chuckled. Gojyo was taken aback when a strange, twisted smile crossed his cheeks.

"You boys..." He laughed softly into his hand. "Heaven is a lovely neighborhood, but it's staffed by devils. Not everyone here is so nice; the second someone gets power and worshipers, they forget enlightenment. We're all human deep down, you know." He moved some papers aside to get a good, close look at the boys and to let them see him clearly. "I'm not perfect, but I'm going to do everything in my power to put you somewhere you'll be cared for. If nothing else, you've given me the best laugh I've had in the last century." His smile faded, which was something of a comfort- though his lips had stopped smiling, his eyes had not. "But I'll need you to be patient and help me. Help me to help you." He looked back down to the papers, then back up at the boys. "And don't hang around in the door like that. I don't bite." He grinned again.

Aka chuckled, and hid a dignified smile behind his hand. Gojyo felt his lips do the same...

* * *

The next thing he knew was a tumult of memories: filing papers, running errands, getting lost on the streets of Heaven delivering bundled files. Konzen had been kind enough to procure the boys clothing other than the filthy robes they'd been wearing since they'd left the monastery, giving them each some plain white tunics and baggy pants that almost fit them. He slept on Konzen's floor, he ate take-in food that Konzen brought, and watched Konzen tear through his in-box for hours. He did make a few token efforts at conversation with the boys during meals, but it seemed he had little to talk about, or little he wanted to talk about. He seemed too wrapped up in his work to talk to them otherwise, except to ask them to 'take this here' or 'pick this up from there'. Gojyo could tell, however, that perhaps there was something he wanted to say. When the three sat down to meals, Konzen always seemed to be holding back. He didn't know how he knew, but there was something familiar about his facial expressions that let him read Konzen clearly.

Things finally settled on a sun-drenched afternoon, when a knock sounded from the door frame. "Enter," Konzen called, and both Ryuji and Aka turned from their self-assigned posts on either side of the door to see the guest slide the door open and shut it behind him. He was tall and thin, young and fairly handsome, though quite disheveled: his shirt was wrinkled, his hair long and unkempt. Glasses were perched on his nose, slightly askew, and an equally crooked smile was painted to his cheeks. Gojyo knew that face, but something wouldn't let him put a name to it. "Field Marshal Tenpou, it's rare you come to my office. How can I help you?"

"Your lovely aunt sent me, I'm afraid, to take your errand boys." Tenpou smiled blithely and gestured to the boys with both hands. "One of the Western generals has agreed to take them under his wing."

"I see." Konzen promptly looked back down at his paperwork. "Boys, it seems your new home has been selected."

"My, my," Tenpou chuckled. "Come along, young soldiers."Aka and Ryuji traded a furtive glance, and simultaneously bowed to Konzen.

"Thank you for looking after us," said Aka.

"It was an undeserved kindness. We are grateful," Ryuji mumbled. Tenpou wrought his brow curiously.

"Konzen, are you certain you do not need one page to help you?" A chipper smirk creased his cheeks. Konzen scoffed.

"I handled myself adequately before, I'll be fine as I am." He was already in the middle of more paperwork. Tenpou put a hand on each boy's back as they joined him, but as they opened the door again, Konzen looked up. "It was a pleasure to have you here. I'd keep you if I could." Both Aka and Ryuji were surprised at this brisk declaration- he was unusually straightforward. "You'll be happier elsewhere, and that's what's most important." Konzen looked back down at his papers and slowly began to write again. Aka and Ryuji turned back towards him and bowed again, their heads low. Konzen simply nodded and looked away.

"Come, then, we shouldn't keep your new guardian waiting," Tenpou insisted gently. He began to herd them out, and the twins clasped hands, Aka's left folded in Ryuji's right.

Tenpou led them out of Konzen's office through the back entrance, and led them down a path towards one of the outer neighborhoods of Heaven. Gojyo spotted another face he recognized but couldn't place. He was a damn handsome man, or so Gojyo thought, but something about the wild, dark mane of hair threw him. He wore a big black coat with the army's insignia on it, and had an unusual mark on his forehead. Still, he grinned cheerfully at Tenpou and the boys as they approached.

"This must be them!" He was beaming like a sunrise, and he rushed forward to meet them. He got down on one knee to meet their eyes. "I'm General Kenren. You can just call me Kenren, you don't need to be formal with me. How about you two?"

Ryuji was taken aback by how forward he was, and could tell Aka was as well. Both boys mumbled their introductions, but Kenren still grinned. "Alright, Aka, Ryuji." He shook each of their hands in turn. "Ryuji, you're the big brother, right?" Ryuji nodded. "That makes Aka the baby brother!" Aka's cheeks flushed, but he nodded all the same. "Alright! Thanks for bringin' 'em, Tenpou. I'll take it from here."

"I understand. Just remember what I told you," Tenpou warned, though it was accompanied with his seemingly ever-present warm smile. "I'll be seeing you two again soon. For now, I've got other business. Later, Kenren." With that, he tucked one hand into his pocket and strolled away, absentmindedly humming a vacant tune.

"What does that mean, he'll see us again soon?" Aka wondered, looking suspiciously at Kenren. Kenren chuckled.

"Me and Tenpou are buddies off the clock. He's kind of spacey, so the three of us might have to help him out here and there. It's not like he's gonna be moving you around or anything, so don't you worry your fuzzy heads about that!" Kenren took a few steps forward, and motioned for them to follow. "Come on, kids, let's walk and talk." He shoved both hands into his pocket, still smiling like it was payday, and the boys followed a few steps behind him.

"So, you're a general?" Ryuji inquired.

"Sure am, in the West Army. Used to be in the East Army, but, well, I'm not anymore. I'm Tenpou's direct subordinate, though to be honest, I'm in charge half the time!" He chuckled to himself, tossing his head back.

"Are we in the army now, too?" Aka fidgeted with his shirt anxiously.

"What? No. You're too little." Kenren laughed again. "Gotta be thirteen, and your files say you're not even close yet. Big guys up top don't like little kids getting killed for their sake. Big kids, sure, little kids, no way." He slowed his pace to let the boys walk a little closer to him. "But you'll be staying with the Army and doing some training, just no missions."

"Wow, Lady Kannon really does want our help!" Ryuji exclaimed eagerly. "I bet she'll really answer our prayers."

"That's right, kid," Kenren assured him with a hearty laugh. He stopped in front of a large yard with long shelters on either side. "Say hello to the barracks! All my soldiers sleep here." He considered the tent for a moment as Ryuji and Aka surveyed it. They could see lots of adult men milling around the yard. Kenren looked between the yard and the twins for a moment. "Yeah, all my soldiers, except you. Say goodbye to the barracks." He tucked his hands back in his pockets, and the twins quickly turned to follow him. "You can sleep there when you join proper. Goujun can screw himself if he thinks I'm gonna... never mind that." He cleared his throat and yanked a box of cigarettes from his pocket, and quickly lit one up. He smoked it, stewing silently as he led them to the officer's quarters. He stopped in front of a little house. "Alright, guys, this is where you're going to stay- this is my house, and it's yours now too. Make yourselves comfy, dinner'll be up soon."

Kenren's little hovel was sparsely decorated. He quickly shredded a few unframed paintings off the wall, leaving only the pins and some torn corners, before Ryuji could get a good look at them. Other than that, there was a single futon, there was a stack of books and magazines on an end table, there was a low, long table, there was a tiny kitchenette, a rolled up sleeping mat in the space beside the futon and little else. The table and floor were littered with empty sake bottles and spent cigarette butts. Aka and Ryuji cleared spaces on the floor and sat, pulling themselves close together and trying hard not to touch Kenren's things. Kenren went into the kitchenette and began to dig things from the icebox. Aka leaned towards Ryuji conspiratorially.

"Why would he bring us here?" He whispered. Ryuji shrugged.

"Maybe he's worried we'd get beat up in the barracks. Konzen said not everyone here was all that nice." They heard Kenren swear loudly, and turned to see him pick a slab of tofu off the floor. He examined it, top and bottom, until he realized the boys were watching him. He laughed nervously, and ran it under the tap. "Then again," Ryuji continued, "maybe he has something else in mind."

They watched Kenren cook and swallowed their amusement; he seemed to have some rudimentary knowledge that cooking was a thing people did, but he had no idea what exactly went into it. He knew how to work his steamer, that was true, but as he tried to chop the tofu on the counter, it slipped and slid around. He grumbled swears under his breath, at one point grabbing his index finger and swearing aloud. He glanced behind him briefly, grinned at the boys, and sucked on his finger as he finished cutting the tofu with his left hand. Aka and Ryuji stole a glance at one another, then fixed identical curious gazes on Kenren and watched him continue to work. He tossed the uneven chunks of tofu into a pan with a dash of soy sauce. "Sorry about the mess, guys; I only found out I was gonna get you guys about an hour ago, so I didn't have time to get my shit together." Ryuji gulped hard- he knew swearing was a thing people did, but nobody had ever sworn in direct speech to him. It didn't offend him, which he found odd- swears were meant to offend, weren't they? From Kenren, it seemed like casual swearing was part of his personality. Something else he'd said, however, hit him harder. "After we eat, I'll clean it all up." Kenren served some rice from the steamer into three bowls, none of which matched each other, and topped it with the tofu. Aka and Ryuji looked at one another, and Ryuji could see that Aka's eyes were wet. Kenren balanced the three bowls and set them on the table. "Here ya go. Ain't much, but it'll do, right?"

"You said 'gonna,' not 'had to,'" Aka mumbled.

"Eh?" Kenren sounded surprised. Ryuji folded his knees tighter to his chest, as Aka hung his head.

"You said you were gonna get us, not that you had to get us." Aka stared into his bowl, breathing sharply and trying not to cry. "It's always, someone has to do something for us. They have to take us. They had to. You say it like you had a choice."

"Oi, kid, don't look so sad," Kenren protested, waving his hands in front of his chest. "Eat, before it gets cold. I don't think age is gonna improve the flavor, and nor is salt." He held out two sets of chopsticks. Aka snatched his and began to dig into his bowl voraciously, and Ryuji gingerly took the other pair. Kenren began to shovel his down with a soup spoon. Ryuji began to eat his timidly, even though the rice was crunchy and the tofu soggy. "So," Kenren started between gulps, "What do you kids like to do? You know, for fun."

"For fun?" Ryuji repeated dubiously.

"Yeah. You know." Kenren swallowed. "Hobbies."

"We, um, like to spar," Ryuji murmured. Aka emptied most of his bowl and shoved it into the middle of the table, still shaking. Ryuji nudged his leg under the table, and whispered, "Quit acting weird."

"Sparring is kinda fun," Kenren replied, seeming not to have noticed Ryuji's muttering. "But what about games? Sports? Stuff you do that makes you happy?" He looked between the two of them, but neither knew how to answer. "Sheesh. What did you kids do all day before you got here?"

"We lived at a monastery," Aka mumbled timidly. "We prayed, and we cleaned, and they taught us some of the defense arts."

"Monastery, eh?" Kenren looked disgusted. "No wonder you two look like little old men. I'm gonna fix that." He finished eating and put his bowl aside, then started to pick up the junk on the floor and table. Ryuji ate in silence, as Aka stared at his folded knees. Ryuji soon found he wasn't hungry, and put his bowl aside to watch Kenren pick up crushed beer cans and torn magazines. Once most of the debris was off the floor, he put the empty bowls in the sink, then returned to the living area and pulled a thin wooden box out from the small table beside the couch. "Okay, let's start here! I'm gonna teach you guys Mahjong."

"Mahjong?" Both boys frowned.

"Why would you do that?" Ryuji asked.

"So you guys can play with me an' Tenpou." Kenren's big, childish smile sprung back to his cheeks. "It'd suck like hell if he came over to play with me, and you two had to sit out because you didn't know how to play. He's pretty good, and if any of us are ever gonna have a chance at beating him, we need to practice now!" He opened the box and started pulling out the tiles. "If you really don't want to play with me, I'll understand." He offered a more subdued smile. "But until I figure out what makes you happy, I can try the things that make me happy. If you like them too, then great! If not, well, we'll just try other things until you find what makes you happy, and I'll learn to like that, too. Then, we'll all be happy together."

_"We'll all be happy together."_ Ryuji felt his whole core shake, and those words echoed in his head. Something itched at the back of his head, something he couldn't understand. He didn't know whether to be angry or happy. He'd never heard anyone say words like that before, and if he had, they were never directed towards him. He slowly scooted into the table beside Aka, and Kenren beamed again. Everything was a blur to him as Kenren began to show him all of the tiles and explain all the rules.

Hours passed in a whirl, and the next thing Ryuji knew, the room was dark, the table had been flipped over, and Mahjong tiles were scattered across the floor. He was laid beside Kenren and Aka on his single mat; Aka was using Kenren's stomach as a pillow, and he was leaned on Kenren's shoulder. Something of this felt like deja vu to Gojyo, but Ryuji still couldn't fathom the huge discomfort that crawled under his skin...

* * *

And nor could Gojyo. Not when he opened his eyes again. He felt a certain measure of comfort to realize he was staring at the ceiling of his cell rather than the dark walls of the "interrogation" room. The pattern of stones in the ceiling had begun to take on a beauty of their own by virtue of not being part of that room. The sun was already setting outside, and the cell was starting to look dim. He could hear Ryuji coughing in the next room, and he had to lean down and look. The boy in the next room was most definitely the same Ryuji whose form he adopted whenever he dreamed- he had managed to catch sight of his reflection once or twice, and the face was almost the same. Certainly, he was a few years older, his jaw a bit more defined, his eyes much wearier, but he had to be the same. How was this possible? What the hell was going on? Finding no answers in himself, he sat upright, and felt a painful cramp in his middle. He had almost forgotten it was there, but as sensation returned to the swollen mass under his skin, he remembered.

"Damn it..." he groaned, as he felt his muscles contract and undulate. His back ached as he pressed it to the wall and folded his legs under his belly. "It doesn't stop... it won't stop growing..." He felt it shift, and Ryuji whimpered loudly.

"It hurts," he whispered, just loud enough for Gojyo to hear. Gojyo felt his legs tremble.

"Kid, what the hell do they even want from you?"

"Oh, Gojyo, you're awake," Ryuji said, leaning down to look into the hole. Gojyo crawled closer to the wall to hear the boy's soft voice better. "I don't know what you mean, though."

"Listen, kid," Gojyo took a deep breath. He couldn't believe he was about to try and explain this to Ryuji. "They have you and me here for a reason. Remember when I said that the reason I was in here was a long story? We ain't got nothing but time in here, so I might as well tell you." He considered his next words carefully. "They... they told me they wanna use me. I... I haven't told you the whole truth." He thought again, but took a deep breath and decided to spit it out. "They said no other hanyou had ever successfully had kids, they can't conceive. They're keeping me captive because I did."

"Th-that's impossible! Hanyou are sterile," Ryuji insisted, shaking his head.

"You're right, on both counts there. Divine intervention." Gojyo looked away from him. "I... I don't think I've told you about my boys yet."

"You... have sons?" Ryuji sounded curious. "More than one?"

"Twin boys, yeah. They're... they're the world to me." He smiled weakly, realizing that his hands had folded themselves over his navel. "But kid, I'm not married, I've got no girlfriend, hell, I haven't even slept with a woman in more than two years, I had them. Out of this body." He slapped his own flesh derisively. "Can't you see what they've done to me? Didn't you think anything was wrong with this? They're trying to make me do it again, and I'm pretty sure they're succeeding."

"Impossible. You can't-" He coughed briefly. "C-can't ask for miracles."

"You think it was a miracle? Come on, kid, love's no miracle." Gojyo shook his head and smiled. "I never asked for a miracle, and I never will." Ryuji suddenly hacked and wheezed, and Gojyo flinched. "Kid, you okay?"

"Everything hurts," Ryuji croaked, and he sank out of view.

"Stay with me, kid. Ryuji, keep talking to me." Gojyo pounded on the wall. His head began to spin again, his heart began to throb painfully, as Ryuji began to expel something wet. Sweat poured down the back of his neck, as his muscles began to wring themselves again. "Ryuji!"

"I-I'm here," Ryuji mumbled. He came into Gojyo's view again, shaking like gelatin.

"Kid, you need to try and talk to me. Tell me why you're here. What the hell did you do to King Rat to get locked up here?"

"I don't know. I... I don't know what they want from me. They hate me, because... everything is all my fault." He shuddered. "Me and my brother, we're the ones that got them here. We... we were their enemy..." He coughed again. "I'm... I'm cold."

"I'm sweating, kid, you must be nuts." Gojyo shook his head. "Talk to me. Stay with me. You said you were a servant of Kannon, right? You're in Heaven's army, right? Were you... were you fighting the King?"

"If you could call it that," Ryuji mumbled.

"You've been trapped down here with the rest of them, right?"

"Five hundred and six years, give or t-take."

"He locked you up when you first got down here, you told me that." Gojyo wracked his brain to remember what he'd seen of Ryuji's memories, but he couldn't remember anything like that happening. "He let you go. Why are you locked up again? Why now?"

"It was a year ago. They... they found out our secret." His voice wavered again, and Gojyo could hear the smile in his timbre. "The Goddess, she appeared to us many years ago, to tell us she still loved us, to tell us she'd found a way to set us free, but she couldn't go the normal routes. She had to use someone she was allowed to play favorites with, and she wouldn't be able to get all of our souls free at once. But she took a part of us, and she promised us new lives. She came back a year ago, she told us she'd been successful. We were going to be reborn." He rested his head on his knees, his breath coming short, pausing to wheeze in more air as he continued, "She even told us... our new names. But the King found out, and he imprisoned me. He told me... my soul was his, my life was forfeit, and that I'd never be free. He'd lock away this side of my soul forever." The smile faded, and he began to cough again. "He'd rip it- to shreds!" Ryuji coughed hard, and turned his wide eyes skyward. "M-merciful goddess, please!" He cried aloud, hacking worse than any cough Gojyo had ever heard, and Gojyo felt a stinging, squeezing pain run through his whole body. Something solid spewed from Ryuji's lips, something wet, wrinkled, and rotten. It made a disgusting splat as it hit the floor, and Ryuji moaned as he continued to hack and wheeze. Gojyo was blinded by the pain, holding back a cry himself. It built up until he could no longer hold back. He groaned, holding his middle tight, and felt his insides twist. He couldn't mistake it that time- whatever was inside of him had grown.

"Fuck. Fuck. The more pain you're in, the worse it gets." His heart raced, as he turned back to the hole in the wall. "Kid, can you hear me? Kid!" Ryuji didn't respond, and Gojyo kicked the wall. "Ryuji!"

"I'm here," Ryuji whispered. His voice was faint. Gojyo managed to contort himself to see Ryuji, lying flat on his side. "I keep asking you... don't call me kid. Don't call me Ryuji, either. I think I've started to hate that name."

"Izzat right?" Gojyo forced a smile. "What should I call you, then? What's your new name?"

"Yohei." Gojyo could hear the smile in his weak voice, but that name wiped any trace of a smile from his own expression. "The Merciful Goddess said I was going to be Yohei, and my brother would be Eiji."

"Yohei. Eiji," Gojyo repeated. "Shit. I... I won't forget those names." His heart twisted in a knot, as everything fell into place. He tried to look at Ryuji again. The boy was desiccated, like he'd been wrung out, and he looked pitifully frail. His skin was starting to look blue. Even so, his hair was the gold of ripe wheat. "Your brother... is he a redhead?"

"Where'd you think he got the name?" Ryuji chuckled weakly. He coughed as he tried to sit up again, but he slumped forward as soon as he got upright. He pulled his knees in tight, curling himself into a little ball. Gojyo shivered; he wasn't cold, but he felt like his heart was frozen.

"Kid, I figured it out. I figured out what they're doing to us. Both of us." He closed his eyes and dropped his voice to a bare whisper. "They're... He's imprisoning your soul. Inside me."

"Wh-what?" Ryuji choked on his breath.

"I don't know how he did it, but that rat bastard made me a sponge. They're making me suck you up." Gojyo rolled the bottom of his shirt up to expose his middle. "I realized... every time you get worse, this gets bigger. The more there is in me, the less there is of you. I don't even know how you're still alive at this point." His heart racing, he began to talk faster as his epiphany came in clearer, and he yanked his shirt back down over his stomach. It no longer reached the bottom of the swell. "They'll probably try to cut me open once you're inside me, try to see how I can fucking carry kids, and there'll be nothing left of you, or he'll let me birth you here and use you as leverage over me-" His stomach turned as he imagined the words. "'I'll kill the kid if you don't give me my way-'"

"Please stop!" Ryuji suddenly shrieked. He had been frozen in fear up until that second, but Gojyo heard him scrambling back to the furthest wall of his cage. "I don't want that! I don't want to die! I don't want to be reborn, not like this!" He pounded on the floor with his fists. "I should have realized- I only get sick when you're near me. I can't be reborn here, I don't want to die here- what if you're right? What if I am reborn here? Could you imagine? I'd be a natural citizen of this place." Ryuji curled up even smaller, pressing his face into his umber hands. "I could never leave here, I'd be part of this underworld. My brother would never forgive me." He looked back up at Gojyo, eyes wide and wet. "Please stop. I... I finally had a chance at having a family. I was promised a father. Someone was going to love me, someone I would never lose. Make it stop!"

"I don't know how he did it, kid, I don't know he's doing it. There's nothing I can do." Gojyo felt his eyes start to fill with hot tears as well. "I wish I could make it stop. I don't want to hurt you. I don't want this to happen. I want to help you, but I don't know how."

"Please stop. Please stop." Ryuji shook his head side to side, his body rocking back and forth. "I don't want to die. I don't want to be stuck here. Please stop!" His voice cracked, but Gojyo could say nothing.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, not knowing what else he could say.

"Please, stop." Ryuji's was almost inaudible, and he coughed loudly. Gojyo felt something shift inside him, but it wasn't his muscles. He could feel a heartbeat that was not his own against the skin of his stomach, and his veins burned. "Please, stop." Ryuji began to cry, his voice high-pitched, and broke again as he sobbed into his palms. Gojyo took a sharp breath, and did the only thing he could think to do.

"You are my sunshine," he crooned anxiously. His voice quavered. He could imagine Yohei in his mind, he pictured him cradled against his torso. He could see the small boy he'd held for only a few minutes, his spun-gold fluff of hair, his sleepy eyes. He understood now. "My only sunshine..."

"Please, stop," Ryuji whimpered.

"You make me happy when skies are gray..." Gojyo hid a hiss into his fist as he felt a stinging, piercing pain.

"Please, stop..."

"You'll never know, dear..." He tried to catch his breath- he felt like his lungs were seizing up, but he mustered all of his strength to keep pushing air in and out. "How much I love you..."

"Please stop..."

"So please don't take... my sunshine..."

"Please stop... singing..." Ryuji laughed weakly. Gojyo laughed too, even as his whole body revolted against itself in pain.

There was nothing else either of them could do.

* * *

**End Notes**: A few production notes here. (Why? Because I am nothing if not painfully self-indulgent.)

The very last scene of the chapter was actually the first scene I physically wrote. I carry around a notebook wherever I go, and I'll scribble in it whenever I'm bored. I've actually filled out about 95% of one notebook (excluding pages torn out for other purposes) with most of the latter half of this story and have started on a second with some of the concluding scenes. I'd just like you to keep in mind that I wrote this in a hotel room with a bunch of my friends hanging out, trying hard to hide what I was writing from the few of them who can actually read my chicken scratch.

In addition, most of what's coming after this? Pre-written in my notebook and edited as I fleshed out the foundation. In fact, all but the very last of the flashback scenes with Ryuji and Aka were written in my notebook before typing. This may be the only reason I'm able to keep up with my rigorous schedule.

Kanzeon Bosatsu mentioned "Shan Tsai." You can check the wikipedia article, but long story short, Shan Tsai was a crippled orphan who wanted to study under Guan Yin's tutelage. He did, and became a Bodhisattva in his own right.

Also, Konzen asked Aka and Ryuji what the "characters" for their names were. Most of you probably know this, but the Japanese and Chinese (and many East Asian languages) alphabets are written with symbols representing syllables rather than singular sounds. However, multiple symbols can have the same sound, but different meanings. In present day, the Japanese government does have a specific set of symbols that people can use to name their children, but we're not in Japan, are we? Anachronistic Ancient China probably has a whole different set of rules. Hence, why Konzen would have to ask how to spell their names.

One last thing: For the curious, "You Are My Sunshine" does hold a special spot in my tiny, black heart. My dad used to sing it to me. (And yes, badly.)

With that said!

Comments? Questions? Review!  
Did you enjoy? Did you hate it? Review!  
Favorite part? Something piss you off? Review!  
Stuff you want to see? Predictions? Review!  
Anything? Review! Nothing? Review harder!

Until next week!


	9. Rising Calamity

**King Rat, No Mercy**

**Author Notes:** That was fun! But the story's not even near over yet.

Review responses:

D-chan: Is he pregnant? Ehh. Kind of? Not really. Not in the traditional sense anyway. Then again, he's a guy, so, throw any sense of "traditional" out the window. If by pregnant, you mean "there is another person inside him dependent on him to remain alive," then yes; at this point, I'd say about half of Ryuji's chi has been pulled into Gojyo, and it is forming a new body inside of him. If you mean "he slept with someone and fertilization occurred," the answer is definitely no. This is not a "natural" occurrence. As for how it did happen, that will be explained in a later chapter.

RodiSquall: Don't relax just yet. In about nine or ten chapters, you're gonna need that bucket again. (No worms, though.) But I'm glad you picked up on the Gaiden implications, and even remembered the unexplained plot point from the last story! (It was so quick and so minimally detailed, I'm sure it ran right over some heads.)

**Disclaimer:** Still own nothing you recognize from the manga, still broke. Aka and Ryuji are mine.

* * *

**9: Rising Calamity  
**

The ceiling had never looked more beautiful as Gojyo counted the stones in the wall. After Gojyo's epiphany, Ryuji was refusing to talk to him and sitting as far away from him as he could, and Gojyo had acquiesced by going to the exact opposite corner, pushing himself as far into the corner as he could. He had curled himself up as tight as he could, as if he could make himself smaller, or shrink himself down. That was perhaps what he wanted most of all.

His abdomen throbbed and ached all the time now. The heartbeat he'd started feeling the night before hadn't stopped, steady and even like the beat of a drum. In any other situation, the gentle throbbing would have been soothing. It was dissonant with the disturbance he felt at its existence. How could there be a life inside of him? He knew for a fact that whatever inside of him was able to sustain another life was empty (by his count) three days ago. He dug his fingernails into his skin, wishing he could simply tear it up and destroy it. He didn't know what this would do to Ryuji, though. Ryuji was still coughing up blood every few minutes. He didn't know if just destroying it would give Ryuji back what had already been taken from him. He still wasn't quite sure if he was right, either, but the evidence seemed pretty clear to him.

_"Yohei. Eiji." _Even thinking about those names hurt now. If Kanzeon Bosatsu had appeared to Aka and Ryuji a year ago to tell them that they had been reborn with new names, particularly those names, then surely there had to be some connection between Ryuji and Aka and his sons. But how? How could Eiji and Yohei be the same as Aka and Ryuji if they had been here for five hundred years? Gojyo folded his arms tight to his chest as he thought. Ryuji had said that she'd taken and freed part of their souls. He had to be looking at what was left of them. It made perfect sense, even if he couldn't believe it.

That left the question of why she'd done it, why she'd chosen him- or Sanzo, for that matter. Hadn't she said that the children were a present for Sanzo? It baffled him, and only now he realized he'd wondered about it for a while. It also made him wonder what would happen if he did destroy the beating heart inside him. Even more, he didn't know how he would go about it.

He hadn't thought of checking his remaining belongings before, only thinking about finding a cigarette (and at this point, he was starting to ignore his cravings for nicotine.) He had checked through all of his pockets twice again, hoping upon hope that he would find anything that could help him escape or do an unspeakably dirty deed, maybe a stray utility knife, a piece of wire, anything at all, and had found absolutely nothing that would help him.

"I don't want you to die, kid. Shit, I'd rather slit my wrists than see you hurt," he muttered to himself. Ryuji grunted, and Gojyo heard his clothes rustle as he sat up.

"What is it?"

"Nothing, kid. Ignore me." Gojyo sighed. He stared between his fingernails and his wrists; he'd remembered how his fingernails had grown faster and thicker the last time he'd been pregnant, but they didn't look much longer now. He tried to file them on the walls, but the centuries of wear from dust and wind had smoothed the stones beyond such use. They would probably be useless for breaking skin. He looked out the window once more, wishing he could see his friends there. And yet, they weren't, and there was a part of him that was now certain they wouldn't be.

He desperately tried to hold onto hope, and yet, there was nothing to reassure him. Even Ryuji wasn't helping.

"What if he... what if he was the one who did it to you?"

"What? You mean, what if King Rat was the one who... Shit." Gojyo groaned. "I... I agreed to let him... No. No way." He quickly pushed the notion from his mind. "I started feeling wrong the morning after I woke up in here. You started getting sick the night I got in here- hell, you said so yourself, you woke up with the cough after I got tossed in here. Point is, the only opportunities he's had to do that to me came after that." He lowered his eyes in shame, and began to rub his stomach. Somehow, the sensation of his palm against the stretched swell eased the stress on his mind. "Also... I'd know if he had sex with me. You might not know, and I hope you never find out, but someone doing that to you without you kinda guiding the way? Hurts like hell. First time I did it, guy I did it to socked me in the eye because I fucked it up bad."

"So, you're saying..."

"There's no way he's had sex with me. I'd know. If you've got a better idea, I'd be happy to hear it, but I can't think of anything else." The air was empty, fraught with rumination but devoid of communication. Gojyo felt embarrassment creep back into his mind; he had honestly wanted to give his sons a more formal, educational sex talk than that, and if Ryuji _was_ Yohei, he had just completely botched it.

"So, what's it like, being a dad and all?" This question had come from nowhere, and Gojyo frowned, surprised.

"Why do you ask?"

"I want to know. I'm curious." Gojyo considered him- he sounded pretty genuine. He sighed.

"To be honest, I don't remember much. I... I kinda feel like a jerk saying so, but after I had them and all, I was flat on my back knocked out for three days. I mean, I think I woke up a couple times, but I don't remember being awake. Like I was on auto-steer for three days. I only saw them right before they were taken away from me."

"Well, if you didn't take care of them for three days-"

"Their father took care of them," Gojyo growled. "Don't you dare try and say-" Ryuji coughed into his hands, and Gojyo stopped.

"They... they have a father, you say?" Ryuji's voice gurgled in his throat, and he spit something out. Gojyo shuddered at the sound, but pushed forward.

"Yeah. There's... there's a guy. I mean, I told you I had it out with a guy. And we kind of fooled around a little." Gojyo paused, and admitted, "Okay, a lot. But because I did get it on with him, the goddess decided to divinely intervene all over me. That's the part that stings my ass." Gojyo chuckled, as Ryuji frowned. "The Goddess said the kids weren't for me. They were for him. But I had to do all the work, at least until those three days. Three days, he walked the earth for them. My one buddy-" he hid a wince at remembering that it had been Hakkai who'd gotten him up to speed- "he told me that my guy did everything for them. And he's kind of a private person, who'd never want to get caught doing anything embarrassing, but he had them out with him, he fed them and cleaned them and changed them and watched them sleep. Thanklessly. Hell, he even sang to them. He doesn't sing. Ever." Gojyo felt a wave of sweat start pouring down his face, and wiped his brow. He wasn't sure why he was so warm, even when his insides were so cold. "But I wake up, and there's the Goddess, saying, 'you can't take 'em with you, leave 'em with me.' I haven't seen them since, 'cept in my dreams."

"Do you miss them?"

"Of course I miss them!" Gojyo scoffed. "I try not to think about it too much, it kinda really hurts to. Whenever I do think about them, my heart twists. They're still my little guys. I fell in love with them before I even knew there were two of them."

"I know that feeling," Ryuji empathized. "That heart-twisting feeling. I feel it whenever I think of my brother." He leaned forward. "So, what are their names?"

"What?" Gojyo looked up at Ryuji, his heart speeding.

"It's... it's actually kind of a funny coincidence, isn't it? I've got a twin brother, and you said you had twin sons." Ryuji chuckled softly. "It's... it's like the worst kind of fate. I was just wondering..."

"I don't want to tell you," Gojyo muttered, lowering his chin into folded arms. "I don't want to burden you with that." His heart was too fast for him to measure- how could he possibly tell Ryuji the truth?

"I don't understand."

"Then don't," Gojyo mumbled. He looked up at the window one last time, and voiced a futile prayer: "If you guys are out there, I'm begging you. Do something, anything. I don't know what else I can do. If you're there at all." He let his head fall. "Please be there."

* * *

Sanzo woke up when he felt a painful twisting in his chest. He sat upright and looked around, eyes wide. He felt like he'd been having a nightmare, like he'd been half a world away and had suddenly been dropped back to the real world and landed hard. He knew, however, that he was exactly where he was when he'd fallen asleep hours before, and his companions were all, mostly, as they were. Aka was awake and pacing anxiously back and forth, as Hakkai now sat beside Goku, waiting for him to wake. Aka turned to Sanzo, his red eyes alight with fury.

"I already told him," he growled, "but I'm going to tell you, for posterity's sake- no more boring stories." He turned away, folding his arms. "Today will not be easy."

"You can say that again," Hakkai replied. He sounded as cheerful as ever- clearly, he was taking Aka's anger at him well. He gave Goku a gentle shake. "I did a bit of looking around last night while you were all asleep, found a rain barrel, and filled the canteen. Here." He tossed his canteen to Sanzo, who promptly opened it and took a long drink. Though he still didn't feel even a little hungry, the water did refresh him. Goku finally roused, smacking his lips, and Sanzo pitched the canteen to him as well. Goku looked confused, and tried to bite the bottle. Hakkai giggled and opened it for him, letting him drink. "I'll fill it once more if we should pass the same barrel on our way. I believe it was south-east of here."

"We'll see," Aka grumbled, kicking the dust at his feet. "Goku, are you awake yet?"

"Yeah," Goku yawned, and he jumped up to his feet. "Ne, Aka, you look so grumpy. Are you sleepy?"

"No!" Aka snapped, and Goku cringed. He withdrew for a moment, suddenly looking smaller. "I... I'm sorry, I didn't mean to shout at you."

"Oh, it's okay." Goku perked back up. "We're all kind of moody. I'm surprised Sanzo's not more angry than usual, since we haven't seen Gojyo in so long." Sanzo got to his feet and moved to join Aka, smacking Goku with his fan as he passed.

"Idiot," he grumbled, and he surveyed the same stretch of land Aka was looking over. Hakkai seemed to be doing the same from where he sat. "Is this our bearing?"

"It should be. I know this is the right general direction, but I'll know it when we see it." Aka nodded, as though affirming it to himself.

"Then let's begin," Hakkai agreed.

"Yeah," Aka sighed, and as Sanzo passed him to overlook the terrain ahead, he heard him mumble, "Ryuji... I hope you're okay." Sanzo nodded in silent agreement, though he was thinking of someone else. He reached into his sleeve and pulled out the crumpled piece of paper. Hakkai came up behind him, and finally caught a glimpse of what Sanzo was looking at. He stayed silent as Sanzo tucked it away again, but as Sanzo turned blood-shot, rage-filled eyes to him, he knew Sanzo had seen him.

As they began their march forth, Hakkai stayed a few meters behind the others. Sanzo could see him looking around intently, though there was still nothing to look at. Aka's limp from before was less pronounced, though still present. Goku was trying to follow him close, but Aka kept trying to pick up his pace to get ahead of him. His expression looked mostly blank, but when they stopped after an hour's walk so that Goku could find somewhere discreet to relieve himself, a convenient thick tree, Sanzo could see the gathering storm behind his distant gaze. Once Goku finished, Hakkai went to the tree as well. He circled it once, and rejoined the group. The second Hakkai came close, Aka began to tromp off again, leaving the other three distantly following his back.

"I dunno," Goku remarked aloud, in response to nothing. Sanzo cocked an eyebrow, and pushed Goku's shoulder. "Oh, I mean, about Aka. I think he doesn't like when I touch him. And there's something weird about him. I don't know what it is- it's like he's special, there's something about him that's kind of shiny-"

"You said that before," Hakkai noted. "I'm not sure I know what that means."

"It's him. He's shiny. Don't you see it?" Neither Hakkai nor Sanzo responded to this, simply trading a blithe smile and a raised brow. "Maybe it's because he's from Heaven. I dunno. I guess, it's like he's lighting up in my head, like he's somebody I've met before but I can't remember his name. I only remember him."

"You mean, you recognize his aura," Hakkai finally deduced. Goku shrugged. "Yes, I think I've gotten that too."

"Any reason you didn't share this with us?" Sanzo hissed. Hakkai giggled into the back of his hand.

"One must exercise discretion with such information. I don't read too deeply into others' chi without permission, and I sincerely doubt he would allow me to. Besides that, chi is very muted here; I doubt I'd get very far."

"Is there anything else you're hiding?"

"Hiding nothing." Hakkai glanced slyly at Sanzo. "You didn't ask me about this before. But I will say this- his chi is much weaker than it should be. Even in this place, it feels like there's much less of him there than there should be."

"Wonder what that means," Goku said aloud, turning his skyward and rubbing his lower lip. Sanzo kept his thoughts to himself.

They continued on into the beating sun, the hours marked by the passing sun. However, as the day passed into the afternoon, Aka's pace began to slow. Sanzo dropped back a few steps, and Hakkai followed suit as Goku finally was able to walk next to Aka again.

"He looks sick," Sanzo muttered. Hakkai nodded. Aka's face looked blue, even in the orange daylight. Deep, black shadows marred the skin under his eyes. He didn't show even a hint of a smile as Goku hung off him and chatted cheerfully about something inane- Sanzo was pretty sure he was asking Aka what his favorite meat was, and Aka couldn't seem to be able to remember. "How much did he sleep last night?"

"Only four hours. He was awake already when I returned from finding water." Hakkai sighed and pushed his sweat-soaked bangs back from his forehead. "He was furious- angry that I'd walked away on my own, angry that I'd put him to sleep. He demanded to know if I'd seen anybody."

"And did you?"

"No. But he was clearly very concerned." Hakkai shrugged. "I think I've started to understand what he's doing."

It was then that Sanzo began to hear the noises of people approaching. It must have been a few dozen men, judging by the sounds of footprints stomping on the dirt. Aka stopped in place and pulled his spear out.

"I told you today was going to be rough," he muttered. Hakkai cracked his knuckles, and Goku stood at Aka's side.

"These ol' geezers don't have a chance against us," Goku said with a smirk. Aka nodded, but his hands were shaking as he gripped his spear tight. The horizon turned red as the men approached. They carried worn clubs and battered swords, wearing the cracked remnants of enameled red armor.

"You're the soldier boy!" One of the men at the front shouted as he spotted Aka. Aka slid his feet backwards a few centimeters, bending his knees and loosening his joints.

"I am, and what of it?"

"We'd heard you'd been in these parts. Didn't clear your path this time, eh?" He pointed his sword at Aka's neck. "Alright, soldier, you've come far enough. Give the outsiders to us and you can stumble away with all of your limbs."

"Never," Aka growled, the hair on his neck bristling with agitation. "I won't let you have them!" He jumped sideways as the first man thrust forth, and rushed at him with his spear raised. Some of the other soldiers came in towards the three Sanzo party members. None of them had their weapons drawn, but they still reached and grabbed for them. Goku and Hakkai dove into the fray, as Sanzo stood his ground and used his hands to strangle and punch any one that came near him. All of the focus, however, was on Aka and not them. The men attacking them didn't use their weapons, but Aka was holding his own against ten armed men. He slashed and stabbed, trying to use the shaft to block the blows coming at his chest. He jabbed at their ribs with the heel of the spear, he swiped at their faces with the blade. His eyes were darting like a fish in a bowl, and even those who were dyslexic at reading people could see the dark shadows of fear drenching his face. They were pushing him back, he was sliding back. One of them cut his face, and something clicked somewhere in Sanzo's head.

No longer able to wait, he whipped out his gun and shot the nearest hanyou through the shoulder. As the victim fell to the ground, yelling and grabbing at his shoulder, and his comrades panicked, with screams of "What the hell is that thing?!" and "Why did he explode?!" Sanzo used the butt of his gun to smack his way through the fray to join Aka. Aka thrust his arm out, pushing Sanzo away.

"Stay back! I won't let them hurt-" He was cut short as a soldier that had crept up on his right side thrust a dagger into Aka's breast. Aka's mouth hung open, eyes wide. A second seemed to last an eternity. Sanzo promptly pointed his gun at the offender's head and pulled the trigger. The sight of their friend's head exploding was enough to back the rest of the attacking hanyou soldiers off of Aka and Sanzo, and Aka fell against Sanzo's chest. Sanzo wrapped one arm around the boy to keep him from collapsing, and pointed his gun directly at the remaining hanyou.

"Who wants to know how many more times I can do that?" He asked quietly. This was enough to send the few who were still conscious and able to move running for the hills. Hakkai pinched each neck as he stepped over them, ensuring they were completely unconscious, and he swept Aka from Sanzo's grasp as soon as he was close enough. The dagger hung tight in his breast, and Aka flailed one arm around to reach for it.

"Don't pull it out. I'm going to fix it as much as I can, but we need to get you settled somewhere first." Hakkai laid him bridal-style in his arms and surveyed the area. Goku slipped to Hakkai's side to try and look at Aka's injury, but Hakkai didn't look at him. "Goku, we're going to find a nice valley, I need you to clean up our footprints and cover our tracks, clean any blood drops, and possibly create some false leads. Stepping backwards, making multiple tracks, all that. Sanzo, stay with me."

"I have only two bullets left." Sanzo opened the chamber to confirm it. Two bullets stared back at him.

"That's more than I'll have with my hands full with this one." Hakkai cradled Aka tight. Aka looked unusually weak and being held like a child had to be making him feel as such, but he seemed to know better than to struggle against Hakkai's touch. Hakkai finally decided on a bearing and began to move forward. Sanzo followed close behind, and Goku began to awkwardly dance around to brush away their tracks. Aka's lower lip was wiggling, and he started mouthing something indistinct at the sky. Sanzo caught a small whisper of the words:

"Ryuji, I'm sorry, Ryuji, I'm sorry..." And then, to Sanzo's surprise, "I'm sorry, Yohei, I'm sorry, Ryuji..."

Hakkai finally stopped in a deep valley, surrounded by a few straggly bushes. Had it rained recently, this pit may have been a small oasis, but at the moment, it was drier than old toast. Sanzo could see Goku still above them, covering their trails and walking backwards in his own footsteps. "Give me your robe," Hakkai demanded. His arms had started to weaken from carrying dead weight, and he was out of breath. Sanzo knew not to argue, and peeled the robe off. He lay it down, inside up, and Hakkai put Aka down. Sanzo didn't even flinch as blood began to pool under the wound. As Hakkai set to work with what few supplies he had tucked in his shirt, Sanzo knelt on the left side of Aka and took his hand. Aka tried to jerk his arm away from Sanzo's grasp, to no avail.

"Stay calm," Sanzo murmured evenly. He squeezed Aka's limp hand, but Aka didn't react. He was still staring distantly away, pupils dilated, muttering incoherently.

"He's probably in shock." Hakkai yanked the dagger out in one quick motion and tossed it aside. Blood spurted from the wound until Hakkai pressed his sash against it. He began to dig in his shirt with his free hand. "But to be fair, he seems pretty shell-shocked most of the time anyway."

"Hm." Sanzo frowned. Hakkai set a roll of bandages down beside him.

"That thousand yard stare he gets, the way he doesn't let us touch him, none of that is healthy."

"Is it so unusual not to want to be touched?" Sanzo scowled. Aka shivered from his head to his toes, his arms twitching and trembling.

"Sometimes, no. At all, yes. Aka, calm your breathing." Sanzo realized that Aka's chest had been rising and falling fast like an amateur at the bellows was trying to revive a fire. Hakkai's instructions didn't seem to reach him. Instead, Hakkai moved the hand that was not stemming the blood to Aka's head. He focused for a few moments, and Aka began to breathe slower. "He's getting cold. His face feels like it's been in ice water. Hold this." Hakkai removed his hand from his sash, and Sanzo held it down as Hakkai removed his shirt. He pulled a few last supplies out of it and lay it over Aka's chest. "It's very strange. This reminds me of something."

"When Yohei and Eiji were born. You gave manual medical care to a hanyou then as well." Sanzo couldn't hide a hint of irritation from his voice. Aka didn't seem to have heard them, the look in his eyes indicating that he was far, far away.

"My, I don't think water will help me here," Hakkai remarked, his voice just slightly sing-song. "This wound isn't nearly so deep. Unfortunately, since chi is subdued here, and his chi is very weak anyway, it will take some time. It's going to get cold when the sun goes down, so set a fire."

"N-no..." Aka suddenly mumbled, and he extended one arm. "No fire... no fire... Ryuji, no, no, Ryuji, no..." Hakkai ignored him, and pressed both of his hands over the wound.

"You said Yohei before," Sanzo blurted out. He knew he should have held back, but that name meant too much to him. "Why did you say Yohei? Do you know someone by that name?"

"Y... Yohei..." Aka stammered, eyes widening again. "G-general, I'm sorry..." He began to breathe faster. "I... I don't... think... we're coming home..."

"You're making him panic," Hakkai admonished, though he kept his voice calm. "Go over there, set the fire, and wait for Goku to show up." Sanzo didn't argue, and dropped Aka's hand. He moved back a few meters and began to break some larger twigs off of the nearby bushes, trying to train his eyes on anything but Aka and Hakkai.

Aka continued to mumble in a disjointed panic, as Hakkai rubbed his forehead. His mouth gradually stopped moving, but his eyes were still wide open. Hakkai kept one hand on the open wound, but used his free hand to hike up Aka's left pant leg. "My, my, you tripped?" Sanzo looked, and saw a huge bruise, deep black and purple, on Aka's left thigh. It looked like someone had taken a hammer to it. "You poor boy, whatever have you done?"

Sanzo turned away and tried to block the noise out as Hakkai continued to work. More and more, now, things were not lining up the way they should. Something was very wrong, and he was fleshing out more and more just what it was.

* * *

**End Notes**: And thus the plot twists yet again!

Okay, everyone knows the drill!

Comments? Questions? Review!

Did you like it? Did you not like it? Review!  
OMFG NO SONGS WHYYYYY? Review!  
Favorite part? Review!  
Predictions? Something you'd like to see? Review!  
Anything? Review! Nothing? Review anyway!

Until next week!


	10. I Would, For You

**King Rat, No Mercy**

**Author Notes:** It's been a long week. I need me some story time.

Review response time!

D-chan: I agree with you- they totally are. Sanzo is probably just attuned like that.

Dragon77: I'm sorry if you've been confused by recent in-story events. Is there anything I can clear up for you?

RodiSquall: I actually have begun to like Hakkai more and more the more I write him. I seem to do that! Not that I didn't like him before, but it's fun when I can have him shed that smile for a smirk and have him give someone a verbal wallop. Oddly enough, they've mostly been aimed at Sanzo thus far, at least in this tale, and I don't think that's changing anytime soon. ("You're sleeping with my sort-of adopted brother-slash-roommate-slash-heterosexual life partner. I'm going to kick you around until you shape up.")

**Disclaimer: **Still not mine, has not been, will not be. Aka and Ryuji are and will remain such.

* * *

**10: I Would, For You**

(**Suggested Track: **"Uninvited," Alanis Morissette)

Gojyo willingly held his hands out for the guard to cuff his wrists. He had stood waiting by the door for an hour after Ryuji finally fell asleep, sure they would come for him but not sure when. He had spent most of the past hour trying to stare through the wall, deep in focus, willing the thrashing heart inside of him to stop. It hadn't, it wouldn't. He had begged and pleaded with it, not understanding what could have been inside of him, not knowing what it was doing to Ryuji, only wanting it to stop, but it had a will of its own. It very clearly wanted to live, and this was the one time Gojyo couldn't allow that.

But now, in chains again, he walked to the "interrogation" room, one guard in front of him and one behind him, and tried to push it all from his mind. He knew he'd made an offer, and even if he hadn't heard a direct response, he knew it had been accepted. He had to pay the piper. The door opened, and the guard unlocked the cuffs on his hands. He looked the guard up and down, but the second he took a step to pass him, the guard grabbed his shoulder and pinched the nerve. Gojyo flinched and seized up in pain.

"You don't learn, do you?" That sly, bored voice sounded from behind him, and he was shoved into the room. The door slammed the second his toes crossed the threshold, and he was in the darkness. Candles were lit, and the room smelled strongly of smoke. Sanzo was sitting on the table, dangling his long legs over the edge. His slow smirk stretched and warped his stiff cheeks. "You're looking... well."

"Yeah, whatever," Gojyo growled. "I know you want me to uphold my end of our bargain."

"Our bargain? Whatever do you mean?" Sanzo slid off the table, his bare feet landing softly on the ground. Gojyo's spine went rigid- the very sound of his footfalls made his stomach ache.

"You gave me food. It shut my hunger up. I'm thankful for that. You asked me to let you touch me." He spat the words out. "Just do it."

"Ah, so you're asking me to touch you now? Impatient, aren't we?" Sanzo reached out and batted one of Gojyo's long bangs from his eyes, but Gojyo turned his head away.

"You're twisting my words," Gojyo growled. "What exactly do you want me to do?"

"Must you be so formal? I've seen you naked, after all," Sanzo smirked, but Gojyo's insides revolted at the sound of that. He whirled back to Sanzo, his lips curled in disgust.

"You son of a bitch- you took my clothes-"

"You usually take your own clothes off when we fuck, you idiot," Sanzo snapped, clearly looking miffed at the accusation. "I have never done anything you haven't allowed me to do."

"Fine, fine, I just want to be sure as hell you haven't touched me in the last three days." Gojyo folded his arms tight around his chest. He was sweating again, but his skin felt frigid even to him.

"Let's change that." The smirk crept back onto Sanzo's face, as he slowly drew closer to Gojyo. "I'll be gentle. All I want you to do is hold very still. Don't pull back from me. Don't flinch. Just try to enjoy it."

"Fine," Gojyo muttered, and he shut his eyes. He could feel his body swaying slightly, unsteady. He realized how weak his legs felt. He sensed Sanzo slip behind him, faster than a summer cold, slicker than a Hong Kong businessman. Sanzo's thin fingers landed on his back, slowly tracing their way to his hips. He could feel his close-cut fingernails dragging on the skin, and a chill ran down his legs. His fingers crept onto his swollen belly, his palms resting on his sides and his fingertips resting near his navel. His hands felt electric, and the charge shook everything inside of him. The second heartbeat he'd been feeling sped up, and his own heart was all but imploding in panic. Gojyo wanted to shove Sanzo's hands off of him, he wanted to scream for help, he wanted to ram his way through the wall and run until his legs eroded to stumps, but he had to hold his word and he didn't know where he could even run.

"Your skin is so soft," Sanzo whispered in his ear. His hot breath made Gojyo feel woozy. "It's so tender when it's been stretched out like this. I can't help but imagine what you feel like on the inside. Won't you let me try it?"

"What are you doing to me?" Gojyo whispered, trying as hard as he could not to vomit, trying to forget what he'd just said. "You know I can't do anything, you know I'm powerless, why are you taking advantage of me?"

"Don't be silly. You asked for this." Sanzo caressed the bottom of his belly, his pinkies brushing the space above the apex of his legs. "There's a way you can be happy. You've been offered an out, you know. You could take it any time and you'd be a happy man. You'd have everything you asked for—"

"And be in the thrall of an insane asshole?" Gojyo finally found enough of his wits to stiffen his body again. He realized he'd started to turn to clay, but he forced himself to be stone. Sanzo drew his hands away, and Gojyo felt his back and legs tense up. The atmosphere was thick, like lightning was ready to strike, and then it did. He felt a fist land in the back of his head, and he crumpled to the ground in a heap. It hadn't hurt too much, but he knew it better to fall than to keep taking hits.

"You're not very much for keeping your word, are you?" Sanzo put his hands on his hips, glowering down at Gojyo.

"You touched me," Gojyo muttered, and he pushed himself up, locking his elbows to keep himself upright. "I kept my end up, you kept yours."

"But don't you want more from me? I could feel your body, I could feel how much you wanted more from me," Sanzo taunted, his glare shifting into a cold smirk.

"Not you. No. I don't want you. I don't want you at all." Gojyo sat on his knees, and began to shake. The ache from the hit finally began to set in, and his head hurt badly. "I want to leave."

"Why? Isn't it your fault you're here in the first place?" Sanzo smirked as Gojyo grimaced. "It was all you, after all. You insisted on staying in that ruined section of wasteland. You touched the seal, and we all fell in to try and save you. Goku would never say anything but he probably thought the same, and he probably rued you til his last breath. Hakkai realized it quickly, he gave up on you faster than a blink. That's how it always happens to you, isn't it? The second someone realizes how worthless you are, they give up on you." Gojyo was silent. The blood was gone from his knuckles. Sanzo took the familiar bottle off the table and held it out to him. "Perhaps you'd rather forget I said that." Gojyo snatched the bottle away from him and gulped half of its contents down. He had a chance to taste it more fully this time- it was bitter, with a hint of sweet and sour, like rotten ginger. He felt weak as Sanzo turned away from him, and slumped forward. Sleep swallowed him as he saw light blaze in from the open door.

* * *

"Go out and play, guys!" Kenren's smiling face met Gojyo's eyes. He vaguely remembered waking up to a terrible breakfast of overcooked rice and runny eggs, and saw that he and Aka were being herded out the door of Kenren's little abode, past a chuckling Field Marshall Tenpou waiting on the threshold. "Me and Tenpou here have to talk big kid business for a few minutes."

"Nothing bad about you boys, I assure you," Tenpou added chipperly, and winked at the boys. "Here, since I'm sure Kenren hasn't gone shopping yet, I got you a present." He held out a black-and-white spotted ball. "Do you boys know what to do with this?"

"Of course I do!" Ryuji snapped, and snatched the ball from Tenpou's hands. Tenpou laughed again, and Kenren waved to the boys.

"Stay in front of the house! I'll be right inside if you need me." He shut the door, and Ryuji grumbled and dropped the ball on the ground. Aka chewed his index finger.

"Brother, what do we do with that thing?"

"Don't play dumb; you kick it." He kicked it with the side of his foot against the wall of the house, and it bounced back to him. "Just like the kids back in the town near the monastery." He kicked it and caught it with his knee, bouncing it back and forth against the wall. "See? Easy."

"I don't remember anything like that. You sound annoyed. Is something wrong?" Aka mumbled, shuffling his feet.

"I slept wrong." Ryuji kicked the ball harder. It almost hit him in the head, but he caught it.

"Is it 'cause you don't like General Kenren?"

"Did I say I don't like him?!" Ryuji snapped as he kicked the ball into the air. It bounced off the roof and dropped back down to the ground beside him.

"You just seem really upset, is all." Aka looked at his feet. Ryuji snorted under his breath. He picked the ball up and tossed it to Aka, who fumbled with it before getting a grip on it.

"You try it." Ryuji folded his arms and leaned against the wall. Aka began to throw the ball up in the air and catch it, getting a feel for its weight. He tried to listen through the window to Kenren and Tenpou's conversation, and managed to catch a few snippets of it around the ebb and flow of their voices:

"... emotionally stunted... you took them here instead of the barracks..."

"... just a couple of kids. It's been less than a day, you gotta give me more time."

"... Lord Goujun... train with the other soldiers..."

"... about Ryuji. I'm worried..."

"Ryuji?" Aka looked at him, ball in hand.

"Eh?" Ryuji turned his focus back to Aka.

"You shouldn't eavesdrop," Aka reprimanded him timidly. Ryuji scoffed, and Aka sighed. "Guess it's okay to kick it..." He tossed the ball up and tried to kick it with the bottom of his foot as it fell. He missed, but Ryuji frowned.

"Uh, bro, that's not-" Aka ignored him, grinning a wide, teeth-shown grin and shaking his head.

"One more try!" Aka tossed it again, and this time landed a side kick squarely in the center of the ball. Ryuji watched, stunned, as the ball zipped across the street and was stopped between a man's hands, only a millimeter from his nose.

"Ah!" The man looked appalled, gripping the ball in his thin fingers, and both boys quaked as they got a good look at his scowling face. "Who threw this?" He demanded angrily, glaring around slowly. The few others out on the street quickly scurried out of the way, but he fixed his gaze on them. "Then which one?" His dark gaze settled on Aka. "You." He strode up to the pair, and Aka shrunk back behind Ryuji, leaning around his shoulder as the tall, thin man with long fingernails and whiteless eyes. He dropped the ball at their feet. "You must be Kenren's new charges. Have you no respect for your superiors?"

"Who're you?" Ryuji demanded. Even if the man glowering down at them did have scales and horns and the eyes of a youkai, he had no intention of letting him talk to Aka with that look on his face.

"You mean you don't know? Not even a guess? I am the Lord of your army, boy." Ryuji and Aka's bemused looks betrayed their ignorance. "Lord Goujun, the Dragon of the West." His brow wrinkled as he sneered at Aka. "And your heretic friend here clearly doesn't know not to insult your superior."

"Heretic?" Ryuji growled. Aka's eyes widened, his body suddenly quivering with panic.

"I'm sorry, Lord Goujun sir, I was just trying to kick the ball like Tenpou wanted me to, I didn't see you-"

"You don't talk to my brother like that!" Ryuji exploded. Gojyo's gut sank through his spine- _You dumb kid, what are you thinking?_ "He's not a heretic, he loves the Gods as much as anyone else!"

"Hold your tongue!" Goujun snapped.

"It's because he looks different, right?" Ryuji's whole body began to shake, his hair standing on end. "Everyone looks at us and they think- they _know_- he's a heretic and I'm not. I don't understand you people! We look almost the same! I'm a heretic as much as he is, and I'm not going to let some pompous jerk who calls himself a Lord talk down to my baby brother!"

"Brother?" Goujun repeated, and scoffed. Gojyo could tell he was resisting the urge to sink to the boys' level. "Anyone with clear eyes can see that he's a hanyou, and you're not. Whoever told you two you were brothers has perpetrated a grievous wrong against you. Allow me to right that wrong-"

"Shut up, you bastard!" Ryuji screamed, his voice cracking. "We are brothers! We look almost the same! Shut your ugly mouth, or I'll kick your ass!"

Goujun wound his hand back, and Gojyo wanted to flinch, but the door to the house slammed open. Kenren rushed out, shoved Ryuji and Aka back three paces, and stood before Goujun in the exact spot where Ryuji had stood. Goujun bared his teeth. "General Kenren, what is the meaning of this?"

"Continue please, sir," Kenren whispered, rage poorly hidden behind a completely serious mask. He continued, a few decibels louder, "You were going to punish me for insubordination and disrespectful behavior towards a superior officer."

"Are you offering to take his punishment?" Goujun asked icily. Kenren shook his head.

"It's not his punishment at all. It's mine. They are my charges, I am responsible for his actions." He glanced at them, then back at Goujun. "Will this require a formal reprimand, or just public humiliation?" Kenren was trying to appear as calm as possible, though his fists shook at his sides with withheld anger and he couldn't look Goujun in the eyes. Goujun seemed to be regaining his composure.

"Forty lashes should suffice," he muttered after a moment of thought. "Come on, then." He whirled on his heel and began to walk away, and Kenren offered the boys a quick grin before following.

"I'm very sorry for my words, sir, I really should know better."

"Hold your tongue. I don't want to hear it." Aka and Ryuji were frozen in place, watching Goujun and Kenren's retreat, until a hand touched each of their shoulders.

"Come along, boys," Tenpou said, in his usual, relaxed tone, "You must at least watch." Neither of them had heard Tenpou come out of the house, too fixated on Kenren and Goujun. Both boys were still, until Aka thought to pick up the ball and held it out to Tenpou, head bowed.

"I'm sorry. I misused your present, and I caused all this trouble." Aka was near tears, but Tenpou rubbed his head, took the ball, and set it down against the wall.

"It's not your fault. You meant no harm." Tenpou's words may have softened the blow on Aka's heart, but they stabbed Ryuji in the gut. Silent, the boys followed Tenpou down the path towards the barracks. Ryuji reached his right hand out to grab Aka's left, and the two clasped hands tight all the way down the sidewalk.

A crowd of soldiers had made their way to the parade grounds, forming a large circle around Kenren. Kenren was on his knees, his chest bare. Goujun selected one of the soldiers, handed him a coiled bullwhip, and stepped back. Tenpou jostled his way to the front, pushing Ryuji and Aka in front of him, and he held Ryuji's shoulders squarely in front of him. The soldier uncoiled the whip and glanced at Goujun, who waved him on and folded his hands behind his back. The soldier brought the whip back over his shoulder, hesitated as he focused on Kenren's back, and cracked the whip hard. Kenren winced and gritted his teeth, but maintained his composure. "One," Tenpou counted. The whip cracked again, striking horizontally against his lower back. Kenren held still, gnashing his teeth. "Two." The soldier couldn't bear to look as he brought the whip down again. "Three." Kenren grunted and stumbled forward a step, but forced himself to stay upright. The whip came down. "Four." Kenren looked back up and spotted Ryuji in the crowd. He flashed him a bright grin, until the whip snapped on his back again and his smile turned into a grimace. "Five."

Tenpou counted each crack of the whip into Ryuji's ear, and Ryuji couldn't look away. Kenren didn't rise, didn't fight, didn't protest. He doubled over after ten lashes, and Ryuji saw blood splatter from the wounds after fifteen. He kept expecting Kenren to tell the soldier to stop, to tell Goujun 'Punish the kid instead,' but he didn't. "Forty." Tenpou counted the final lash as the whip cracked, and and promptly released Ryuji's shoulders and moved to Kenren's side. Kenren collapsed onto his hands, hunched over and trying to catch his breath. Ryuji could see his back was crisscrossed with long welts, bleeding sluggishly in spots, streaked with dust that stuck to the sweat trickling down his shoulder blades. "I counted forty. That's enough. He's thoroughly humiliated."

"Fine," Goujun acceded. "We'll talk business when you're not bleeding. Go lick your wounds, and keep your wards on a tighter leash." Goujun pivoted on his heel and walked away, pushing through the crowd and making his way towards the aristocratic quarter. Tenpou picked up Kenren and hoisted him onto his shoulders, and the soldiers began to disperse. The shell-shocked boys were left alone. The bullwhip lay abandoned on the ground, like a thin, hateful snake, wet with blood. Tenpou steadied Kenren's body against him and began to lug him towards the officers' housing. Kenren was only just able to support his own weight. The twins reached out to each other and grabbed hands again. They followed Tenpou and Kenren home, shame tingling uncomfortably in their chests like they'd pissed themselves.

* * *

**(Suggested Track:** "Letters from the Sky," Civil Twilight**)**

"Man, that sucked," Kenren chuckled as Tenpou filled a basin with warm water from the kettle and tossed a rag into it. "Biting my tongue until Goujun was gone was bad enough, but good goddamn, has it been a while since I had to take a whipping. I don't think the damn kid meant to hit me that hard, but damn if it didn't hurt!"

"Don't be such a baby," Tenpou scolded playfully. Kenren was crosslegged on the floor in front of the futon, and Tenpou sat behind him and began cleaning the gashes out. Aka and Ryuji stood by the door, dumbfounded, hands gripped tight. "Well, still," Tenpou continued, "I suppose you've learned your lesson."

"Yep, yep, no more backtalk for me, no sir!" Kenren laughed, and Ryuji couldn't take it anymore.

"General Kenren?" He finally managed to vocalize.

"What's up, kiddo?" Kenren grinned at him, but he quivered and shrank back.

"General, I know I have no right to ask, but please don't kick Aka out. He didn't do anything wrong." Aka's wide eyes shot urgently to Ryuji, but Ryuji bowed deeply at the waist, folding his hands tight against his chest. "I was wrong. I'm sorry."

"Ryuji," Kenren started, but Ryuji buried his hands in his hair and tore at his scalp anxiously.

"Please don't punish him for something I did! Kick me back down to the surface, but let him stay. Please."

"Ryuji, you seriously think I'm tossing you out?" Kenren laughed aloud, and Tenpou braced him to keep him from moving. "You gotta be kiddin' me!"

"Wh-what?" Ryuji felt the blood drain from his face completely.

"Come here and look me in the eyes." Kenren waved him over. Ryuji timidly approached. "Siddown." He obeyed without a word. Kenren leaned forward, resting his chin in his palm and his elbow on his knee, and smiled. "Tell me what happened, kid."

Aka still stood by the door, shuddering in place, as Kenren listened to Ryuji's explanation. Gojyo could feel Ryuji's heart pounding, could feel the cold sweat on his hands, and could see the tears gathering in the corners of his eyes. Kenren didn't interrupt him, only nodding silently as he retold it from the top. He even swallowed a hiss as Tenpou squeezed warm water into a deep wound, just so he wouldn't make any noise. Ryuji curled himself up tighter and tighter, knees against his chest, hugging his legs, as he came to a conclusion: "I just don't understand, Mister Kenren, I was so angry I would have picked a fight with a wall. I jumped at the chance to tear him down when he started insulting my brother. You and Marshall Tenpou, you guys are the only ones who don't talk about how different we look, how he's bad and I'm not. Even Lord Konzen didn't believe we were brothers, but at least he didn't insult us." Ryuji began to rub at his eyes, and Kenren planted a hand on his shoulder. Still, Ryuji couldn't even look Kenren in the eyes. "But it's even worse than that. I was angry at you because of how nice you were to me, because I don't know what to do when people are nice to me. I didn't know what to do with myself, and I got you in trouble because of it. I don't know what to do now."

"Kid..." Kenren put his hand on top of Ryuji's head. "Let's put everything on the table here, that ought'a clear things up. First off, don't call me Mister. I ain't that old. Second off, that Dragon fuck had it coming." Ryuji met Kenren's smiling eyes with surprise. "Third..." Kenren glanced at Aka, then back to Ryuji. "Look, about your brother- Well, really, it's about you. Kid, you have special eyes."

"Huh?" Ryuji was speechless.

"Your eyes." Kenren gently tapped the center of his forehead. "They're different. You don't see that your brother is different from you, not the way me and Tenpou and everyone else does, because your eyes are so special. And that's a good thing." Kenren smirked. "Too many people judge on appearances, and pass judgment on something stupid, like the colors of your hair and eyes. But kid, it's okay to be different from your brother. I know you can't see it, but we have to at least acknowledge it. Can we try and do that much?"

"If I might?" Tenpou offered from behind them. Kenren nodded, and Tenpou rose and went to the icebox. He pulled out two apples, and held one in each hand. "Aka, which one is closer in hue to your brother's head, and which is closer to yours?" Aka chewed his lip nervously and pointed in turn.

"Left is mine, right is his," he mumbled. Tenpou juggled the apples for a moment, then faced Ryuji. Ryuji stood up to get a closer look.

"Same question," he smiled. Ryuji looked between the two apples. They looked almost identical- the same hue, different shades. He shook his head. Tenpou sighed. "It's like Konzen conjectured in his note." He held up the apple in his right hand. "Ryuji, this apple is yellow, but you probably knew that. The one in my left hand is red, like your brother's hair and eyes."

"Red?" Ryuji felt a jolt to his stomach. He was only now realizing- he'd heard the word, but he was not quite sure what it meant. "It... it looks brown. His hair is only a little darker than mine, it's not that different!" Tenpou handed each boy their respective apple, and Ryuji turned his over a few times. He looked at Aka's, but still couldn't fathom their differences.

"Ryuji, your brother has crimson hair and eyes. These are the traditional markings of a hanyou." Tenpou was clearly trying to sound as soothing as possible, but it didn't help. Ryuji felt his insides go completely numb- he knew what that meant. "While I most certainly believe that you two are brothers, it is rare, but not entirely unheard of for twins to have two different fathers. Stranger things have happened, and with the way some people are, it seems inevitable that a woman would bear a hanyou and human side by side." Tenpou sat back down behind Kenren and continued cleaning his wounds.

"B-but..." Ryuji stammered, turning the apple over again and again.

"You're colorblind. Probably only partially so. You can't see the colors red or green, can you?" Kenren smiled, as Ryuji dropped to his knees. "But he's still your brother. And no matter what anyone says, you still love him. He still loves you. Right?"

"Of course I do!" Both boys exclaimed.

"And that's all that matters. You two are brothers, no matter what anyone says. Makes me kind of jealous, really." Kenren tilted his head, affectionate eyes meeting Ryuji's. "If you have that much love for each other, then I want to be your brother too." Kenren opened his arms wide to Ryuji. "Can I try to be your big brother?"

Ryuji's heart exploded with emotions, and even Gojyo could understand why: he barely knew them, but he was offering to love them the same way they loved each other. All that anger dissolved- he realized he would never have to hate anything Kenren said or did, that Kenren wouldn't stop being nice. Kenren was going to love him. Ryuji threw himself at Kenren's chest, and Kenren caught his hug with one arm. He could see, between the tears in his eyes, that he left his other arm open for Aka, who stumbled across the room and grabbed on to him. His chest was warm, his stubble-coated chin scratched their shoulders, and they both loved the feeling. Tenpou chuckled and sat back from Kenren.

"My, my, I suppose this makes me an uncle."

"Shut up, grandpa, we're having a moment," Kenren laughed, and squeezed the boys tight. "I'm gonna step up, I'm gonna take care of you guys. No matter how you're feeling, no matter what people say, I'll do anything for you."

Gojyo knew this feeling. This was love. It had to be. He knew the look in Kenren's eyes mirrored the way he looked at Yohei and Eiji.

* * *

**End Notes: **I'm sure some of you already suspected Ryuji's little secret. I even did the research on it, and by that I mean I used Vischeck and ran some pictures of apples and other stuff through its color-blindness simulation. The specific kind of colorblindness is deuteranopia, complete red-green colorblind. This would be why the world looked wrong to Gojyo through Ryuji's eyes. Colorblindness is more common in men than women, though incidence rates are lower in Asians (though not unheard of.) So yeah- bottom line is, Ryuji had no idea Aka was a hanyou. If you're at all curious about what the world would look like through his eyes, just search for "vischeck" on your preferred search engine and have at it! There are other sites out there.

Also, I do love that scene. Makes my tiny black heart skip a beat when I think about those three being all happy together. And yet... are you all familiar with the phrase "Doomed by Canon?"

This week has been awfully rough on me, and as such, I got very little writing done. So, while this chapter is up on schedule and the next should be on time, I'll be putting in an omake after that. With any luck, I should be able to get some more chapters typed up.

With that said!

Did you enjoy it? Review! Did you not enjoy it? Review!  
Critique? Things I can improve upon? Review!  
Comments? Questions? Review!  
Things you'd like to see? Review!  
Anything? Review! Nothing? Review!

Until next week!


	11. The Life of a Rat

**King Rat, No Mercy**

**Author Notes:** Finals are over, ETB gets an A for the course! Now comes the next two accelerated classes. Don't worry, it won't affect my update schedule.

Review responses!

RodiSquall: Yeah, I'm fine! I just had a major project due last Thursday, and basically worked day and night for five days straight. Left very little time for leisure writing. And I came up with the idea of making Ryuji colorblind early on in designing his character, which is especially effective in a universe that judges very harshly on appearances. My only concern would be that it cheapens his affection for his brother, but then I realized that he'd love Aka even if he knew he was a hanyou. He just didn't, and was surprised (to put it mildly.)

D-chan: I'm actually glad you asked, since this is a perfectly good point to explain. The flashbacks are part of Gojyo's dreams. Every time he falls asleep, he is experiencing Ryuji's strongest or most important memories. This is because Gojyo is absorbing Ryuji's soul, and his memories are tied to it. He is essentially reliving Ryuji's life through his eyes. If he were absorbing any other soul, he'd be seeing those memories as well.

As to why this is a perfect point to explain? Read on.

**Disclaimer:** If I were making money off of this, would I be in college again?

* * *

**11: The Life of a Rat**

"Fucking rat. Fucking rat. Filthy, nasty, fucking rat." Gojyo didn't know this voice, but it dripped hatred. He was reminded of his own stepmother, until he opened his eyes and saw a bedraggled woman- swollen cheeks, tangled hair, and human eyes- grabbing his face, holding his chin. She squeezed his cheeks, her fingernails digging into his skin. "I hate you. You've ruined my life. Why won't you just crawl back into your monster father's skin where you came from? Fucking rat!"

"Please, mother-" the weak voice he felt coming from his lips was not his own, it was immature, it was high pitched, it was reedy. "I don't know what I did-"

"You exist. Your monster father forced you on me, and now you exist. And I hate you for it!" She lifted him up by his neck and pitched him at something hard, and everything was dark again. Gojyo began to hear other voices:

"... tossed out by his nutty ol' mama when he was three. He's been in that spot for two years now. No, don't give him food, you think a freak like that wants to live?"

"... I don't think he has a name. Nothing but a street rat anyway."

He opened his eyes, and looked down at his thin, bony hands. He was curled up against a wall on a dark street, surrounded by refuse. His arms were no thicker than birch branches, his knobby knees thin little lumps under the ragged tunic he wore. A man stood over him, with red hair, red eyes, and a loaf of bread in hand. "Here, kid." He dropped the bread in front of him, and laid a thick sheet of butcher paper over his shoulders. "No child deserves to live like this. If I could have kids, I'd never want to see them like this." The man walked away, and he grabbed the bread and hugged it to his chest. It was warm, it smelled good, though he knew this meal was only a temporary delay of what seemed inevitable. But something welled up in his chest, something powerful, a determination without name.

Gojyo felt his fists clench around the bread, and heard his reedy little voice whisper, "No more." He tore a piece of bread off and stuffed it in his mouth, still mumbling through his full mouth, "Nothing but a rat... filthy rat... then I'll be a rat."

Gojyo's heart screamed when he realized who that voice belonged to. How was he seeing Nezuoh's memory now? Was something of him inside of him too?

* * *

**(Suggested Track: "It's Time," Imagine Dragons. **There's a really nice acoustic version on YouTube, filmed at the Occidental Saloon.**)**

He didn't have time to think about it. All the memories of that dirty, trash-filled alley were quickly replaced by a whirlwind of happy memories.

"Y'see, sir," he heard Kenren saying to someone. Ryuji and Aka were hanging outside the window, their contraband soccer ball between them, as they listened to the conversation inside the house. "We- Tenpou and myself, that is- did some looking into it. They are brothers, just different dads. The two were tormented most of their lives on the lower world, which is why Ryuji reacted to harshly to your admonishment of his little brother. Besides that, he's colorblind, so no, he honestly couldn't tell his brother is any different from him."

"Colorblind?" Goujun sounded disgusted. "Unfortunate bastard." Ryuji clenched his fist, but Aka covered his hand.

"He is, yeah. And that's why I took his punishment- he couldn't help his feelings, and I wasn't there to stop him. But you know, I think we have a chance to do something good with them. If there's ever been anyone who needs some leadership, some stability, it's the two of them. You still want them reassigned?"

"No, no," Goujun sighed. "They may stay here, they can live with you until they are old enough to join the army. I expect you'll start them in basic training soon. As I said before, keep them on a tighter leash until the older brother learns to control himself." They heard Goujun rise, and the pair quickly scrambled from the window and started kicking the ball back and forth to one another. The door opened, and Kenren opened an arm to show Goujun the way out. Goujun stopped on the path and considered the boys. They froze, but he let a tiny smile twitch across his face. "It seems you have gotten better at soccer. Use the side of your foot, not the toe, you'll have more control that way." He reached out and planted his head on Aka's head. Aka's cheeks darkened in a blush, and Goujun turned and left. Kenren flipped the bird at Goujun's turned back, then gave the twins a thumbs-up. Ryuji and Aka grinned- they were safe!

He blinked, and the scene changed.

"Do you like that book?" He looked up, and saw Tenpou smiling at him. The room around him was a pigsty, laundry hanging from the ceiling rafters, an ashtray overflowing, books and paper strewn everywhere. Ryuji had a thick book open to a world map in his hand, as Aka and Kenren tried to pick things up. "My, you boys surely never had a formal education. And combat practice with Kenren doesn't really count, does it?"

"Hey, man, I'm trying my best!" Kenren protested, but Tenpou giggled pleasantly.

"How about after we finish cleaning, I give you boys some real lessons? I'll teach you math and geography, and I'll show you some good books."

"I have books," Kenren grumbled.

"Books with more words than pictures. Does that sound fun, Aka?" Aka nodded, and Ryuji nodded too. He couldn't keep the smile from his face.

The next thing he knew, he was waking up on a sleeping mat. Two others were next to his, and Aka was in the one furthest from him. The middle one was empty, and appeared to have been long such. Konzen, inexplicably, was sitting on Kenren's futon and flipping through one of his magazines with disgust on his face. A spread of store-bought dumplings and fresh tea waited on the table. Ryuji sat up and gawked at Konzen, until Konzen looked up at him.

"Your guardian is away for the day on some nonsensical exercise. I was asked to mind you until evening. Eat breakfast and bathe so I can give you your lessons for the day, and you'll have to come with me so I can take care of some business." Konzen cast his eyes around the room, before looking at Ryuji again. "How can a house so sparsely furnished still be this poorly kept? Do all army urchins live like this?"

"Aka, wake up!" Ryuji tossed his pillow at Aka, his wide smile making his cheeks hurt. "Lord Konzen is here!"

"Really?" Aka shot up in place, eyes wide. He beamed as he saw Konzen, and jumped from his futon. "I thought we'd never see you again!"

"Don't talk nonsense. Did you honestly think Kanzeon Bosatsu would abandon you to the idiots in the army without checking in on you once in a while?" Konzen grinned his twisted grin. "Come here and eat." Ryuji and Aka sat on the opposite side of the table and started picking out dumplings. Konzen tossed the magazine aside, and leaned closer to the twins. "It's been two weeks. I see whoever this is has gotten you new clothes and your own beds, but has he been treating you well?"

"Yeah, he's crazy nice!" Aka grinned. "He doesn't even care I'm a hanyou."

"Ah. And does your brother care?" Konzen was nonchalant as he poured them each a cup of tea.

"You actually knew I couldn't tell?" Ryuji paused mid-bite. Konzen nodded.

"I couldn't be certain, but I had a very strong suspicion. I made a note of my observation in your papers that I passed to Tenpou, with encouragement to look into it further. I suppose Tenpou checked?" The boys nodded, and Konzen sipped his tea. "I'm glad the truth has come out, then." Ryuji and Aka began to eat again, under Konzen's quiet watch. He alternated his gaze between the two again. "Perhaps it is worth mentioning. I had a harder time finding your information than I should have, as you two gave me bad information. Neither of you are eleven. You are ten."

"What?" Aka looked up, confused. "I mean, maybe we lost count, but-"

"No, you are still shy your eleventh birthday. According to the records I found, your birth date- both of you- is on the nineteenth day of the eighth month."

"Isn't that tomorrow?" Ryuji gaped. Konzen rubbed his chin thoughtfully.

"So it is." He finished his tea. "What a coincidence. If you behave and study hard, I'll get you some sort of treat when we run our errands." He looked up at them, and offered them the first smile they'd seen on him that wasn't more sarcastic than sincere. Ryuji and Aka beamed at each other, and obeyed Konzen patiently. Gojyo realized what Ryuji must have realized- Konzen was trying to show them affection as best as he could. His awkward mannerisms, his uncomfortable smile, they only served to make him more familiar.

He blinked back into darkness. Somewhere distant, he heard a quiet, timid voice atonally mumbling: "You are my sunshine, my only sunshine..." The voice sounded terrified, and yet, the droning was comfort in his ears.

He became aware of the door slamming shut, and shot awake. It was late in the night, and Kenren stumbled in the front door, loaded up with boxes. He dropped a duffel bag by the door and tossed most of his poorly-wrapped packages down by the table. He set the last two things he carried, a box and a bouquet of white and yellow flowers, on the table and collapsed onto the floor between the twins. "Ow." They hadn't thought to roll his mat back out. The noise woke Aka, and both boys leaned over him.

"General, are you okay?" Aka asked. Kenren rolled onto his side and grinned.

"You know it! I'm home with you, ain't I?" Aka chuckled, and Kenren pushed himself back up. "I'm sorry I woke you guys. It's damn late."

"Where did you go?" Ryuji asked. Kenren laughed again, and went to turn on the lamp.

"We had a mission down on the lower world. Temple needed defending, sent me and my guys down to take care of it." Ryuji spotted bruises on his face and part of a bandage showing from under his clothes.

"Did you get hurt?"

"Eh? Me?" Kenren pointed at his chest, face wrought with mock disbelief. "Nah, I'm perfect! Not a scratch. Don't you worry about a few little marks here and there, I'm fine. Don't worry about me, what about you guys? What did you do all day today?"

"Lord Konzen came over to watch us," Aka replied, looking a little bewildered by his quick change of subject.

"Lord who now?" Kenren crouched down between them again.

"Lord Konzen. Didn't you ask him to mind us for the day?" Ryuji folded his arms. Kenren grinned nervously.

"Knew I forgot something." He rubbed the back of his head. "What a jerk I am. Tenpou must have thought of it. He kept you entertained?"

"He gave us lessons and took us into town to run his errands. He let us play outside while he did his work and stuff, too," Ryuji answered. Aka nodded in agreement.

"Good. I'll ask Tenpou to send him over again next time I have to go down to the surface." Kenren rubbed his hands together. "Free babysitter!"

"Babysitter?" Both boys repeated dubiously.

"Oh, like you guys know a better word for it!" He stuck his tongue out at them. "Here." He reached behind him and grabbed two of the small packages. "That's for you guys. I found it all outside with your names written on it." Ryuji gawked- a package with his name on it? He noticed part of a message written on the top of his: "Give these to your wards tomorrow-" He looked at Aka's package: "or I will come over there and-" He saw Kenren holding a third, large, square package, shredding part of the wrapping off and crumpling so he couldn't see what the black ink on it said. Ryuji opened his and found a small leather sack full of small, black glass stones. Aka had a similar bag, this one with white glass stones. Kenren opened the third package, and pulled out a plain wooden board with a grid carved across the top.

"It's Go!" Kenren beamed. "It's a Go set! Ah, this is great, I haven't played Go in forever!" He set the board down in front of them. "I kind of sucked at it, though."

"Maybe Konzen will teach us," Aka thought aloud.

"I bet that's what the guy had in mind!" Kenren clapped his hands together. "He needed an excuse to come back and see you. Okay, one more apiece and then back to bed." He grabbed two more packages from the stack he'd carried in and gave them to him.

"Wait, where did these come from?"

"I bought them yesterday and stashed 'em at Tenpou's place while you guys were solving for 'x' or some shit." Kenren reached out and rubbed both of their heads, mussing their hair. "You think I didn't know your birthday is today? And it's past eleven anyway! You can open the rest tomorrow." Ryuji looked between the lumpy package and Kenren, jaw agape. He peeled some of the wrinkled paper back, and saw fabric inside. Kenren leaned forward and looked. "Ahh, did I give you the clothes? Sorry. You'll get better presents tomorrow."

"No, it's nice." Ryuji couldn't keep a smile from his face nor tears from his eyes. "I don't think I've ever gotten a birthday present before."

"Me neither," Aka added, and he began to rub his eyes too. Kenren sat back and smiled contently.

"It's not gonna be the last time you get birthday presents, either. Hell, I even got you guys a cake. It's just vanilla, but it's cake." Ryuji opened the package the rest of the way and pulled out a red soccer jersey with the number 01 embroidered onto it. Aka had a white jersey with 02 on the back. Both boys were dumb with surprise, unsure of what to do or say. They each dropped their jerseys and dove at Kenren, jostling for position to hug on to him tight. He grunted, but wrapped his arms around them. "Hey, what is this?! Come on, guys, it's not like I'm going anywhere. Quit grabbin' me! I'm gonna knock your little heads together if you don't- ah, who am I kiddin'?" He chuckled, and let them hug him. "Happy birthday, kids. You've got a lot ahead of you, right?"

He was happy. He was insanely happy. He was too happy.

* * *

Gojyo opened his eyes for a brief moment, and squeezed them shut again. The bright midday light flooding in through the high windows ached his eyes. His whole body hurt, his swollen middle rippled with pain. This rude awakening was cold comfort compared to the happiness of his look into Ryuji's memories. His hands drifted to squeeze and push the pain down, and comfort washed over him like a rolling river. He would never understand how touching that which he hated so deeply relieved his anxiety.

"Ryuji?" He called, and listened, but there was no answer. He heard a soft cough, and forced his eyes open to turn and look into the gap. Ryuji was curled in tight around himself, his face in his knees. He looked threadbare, as worn out as his clothes, like someone had plugged a spigot into him and everything that made him whole had been filtered out. He was breathing slowly and deeply, fast asleep. Gojyo decided that finding out how he was feeling wasn't worth waking him. He tried to pull his knees to his chest, but was blocked. He vaguely realized that something felt awful about the mass in his middle.

He hadn't thought about it until that moment, but he realized just how unnatural it felt. He thought back to Yohei and Eiji. Somehow, in the few weeks before they had been born, having them inside him felt like the most natural thing in the world, even if it had been incredibly uncomfortable. It had been like wearing a winter coat, like part of his clothing. Their heartbeat- he knew it had been two now, but it had always felt like one- synced neatly with his, their few movements like nothing more than his weight shifting. They felt like part of him, and this was nothing like that. He was painfully aware of the weight inside him. The heartbeat he felt now was syncopated unevenly against his. Something felt wrong. It came to him- this time, it wasn't moving. There was no other movement within him but the beating heart. "What is wrong with me?" He moaned to himself and hugged himself tight. A bitter shiver ran down his spine.

The door to the next cell banged against the wall, and Gojyo looked through the gap. Two guards stood over Ryuji. "Wake him up," one grumbled. The other kicked the boy in the leg, and Ryuji fell over, limp and lame. His hair fell across his face as he slowly sat himself up. He coughed a few times, blood dribbling from his mouth as soon as he opened it.

"Alright, you ugly brat, let's go." The second guard latched his arm under Ryuji's and pulled him up. Ryuji promptly began to retch hard, bringing something thick, wet, and solid from the pit of his stomach. Gojyo cringed as something hit the ground that sounded heavy. "Fuckin' shit-" The second guard sounded surprised at whatever Ryuji had produced, but Ryuji laughed an unusually high-pitched laugh. Gojyo recognized this expression- disbelief.

"Good goddamn, is that a kidney? You smell like a corpse. How 'bout we drown you til you're clean?" The first guard held Ryuji by the collar of his tunic. Ryuji mumbled something indistinct. "The fuck did you just say?"

"... said I'd like that very..." Ryuji trailed off and spat a chunk of something thick onto the ground. "... very much."

"Isn't he weak enough yet? He don't seem to have much life left in him," the second guard asked the first as they began to drag him away. Gojyo pressed his ear to the wall to hear the first guard reply;

"King says kid's gotta be as good as dust. Sooner we break his spirit..." Gojyo could no longer hear them, but he got the gist.

"That son of a bitch," Gojyo growled to himself. "They think they haven't broken him yet? Fucking vultures, they're waiting for him to-" he stopped short, realizing what was coming next. "Die. He's, he's going to die." Gojyo threw himself forward, clutching his head. "No, he can't die," he hissed. "He can't- he's my kid- I'm not gonna be responsible for that!" He chewed his lip, realizing he was talking to himself, but not caring. "No, I can't give in, I can't give up. His brother... his brother won't give up, will he? Aka, you have to help your brother. I can't. I'm useless!" His mind drifted briefly to his friends. Hakkai had given in, this he knew. Goku was gone. But what if Sanzo was still out there? What logic still worked in his aching head told him that Sanzo surely had given in as well, but he still insisted to himself that the Sanzo he'd been seeing was not the real one. He refused to believe it. He beat the thought back into his head- Sanzo had to be there. Nothing would convince him otherwise. "Sanzo, they're your kids too. Ain't you gonna do anything?"

* * *

Goku had fallen asleep shortly after arriving back from covering their tracks, but Sanzo and Hakkai had remained awake through the night. Hakkai had spent the entire night coursing wave after wave of weak chi through Aka's wound, and passed out moments after it had finally closed. Sanzo had watched, unable to find rest. After dragging Hakkai over beside Goku and the dying fire, he sat next to Aka and watched him sleep. He silenced every single wayward notion in his mind, staring silently at the boy's chest quickly rising and falling. When the sun began to come up, he used his sash to cover Aka's eyes. Goku woke up when the sun rose, and joined Sanzo.

"Is he gonna be okay?"

"Ask Hakkai." Sanzo didn't look away from Aka.

"He's sleeping," Goku mumbled. "What do you think?"

"Hakkai did his best. I trust his work," Sanzo replied.

"Rest," Hakkai murmured from where he lay. Sanzo and Goku looked over to him. "He needs to rest. I still need a few more hours myself. Amuse yourselves."

"But- what about Gojyo?" Goku frowned.

"He's stuck here the same as the rest of us. I'm sure an extra few hours making him wait will leave him no worse for the wear. Like you said, he always seems to turn out okay in the end." A small smile creased Hakkai's face, one that looked more false than most.

"I'm worried. We still haven't seen any sign of him." Goku shuffled his feet.

"I've been sensing for him as we've traveled, but I haven't gotten even the slightest hint that he's been here. Perhaps it's because my powers are so muted. This magician Aka knows surely will be able to find him easier than I. For now, I'm still exhausted." Hakkai sighed and was silent; his eyes were still open, but Sanzo knew he was asleep again. Goku sighed as well, and began to trace pictures in the dust.

"I'm starting to get a bad feeling about all this. This place is so dirty and dry and sad."

"Just starting to get a bad feeling?" Sanzo reached out and batted Goku across the forehead. Goku whined and brushed him off. "Let me ask you something."

"Wait, you want to ask me something?" Goku's slack jaw betrayed complete confusion, but Sanzo gave him an incredibly stern glare.

"Relish the opportunity, it may never arise again. Goku, what does the phrase 'King Rat' mean to you?"

"King Rat?" Goku frowned, and repeated it, "King Rat, King Rat, King Rat... I remember hearing Gojyo say it once, a while ago, when he was feeling like a jerk. Rats are bad, right? People don't like 'em. They're pests who steal food and spread sickness and stuff. I guess, if someone's a King Rat, they're a bigger jerk, a bigger pest. No, the biggest pest." Goku nodded. "Yeah. Guess that makes sense."

"So the vermin at the top of the heap would be the King Rat?" Sanzo mused. "It seems too simple."

"Simple is usually right," Goku pointed out. "But some people like rats. I remember Hakkai said once that rats are really smart, but that's definitely not Gojyo."

"It seems strange, that the King here calls himself Rat, but Gojyo used the same phrase on himself," Sanzo pontificated, more to himself than Goku. "And yet, here we are."

"Maybe it's a coincidence," Goku suggested. Sanzo shook his head.

"No such thing."

"Then I dunno."

"Hmph." Sanzo turned his focus back to Aka. "And I suppose it's a coincidence..."

"What is?"

"Never you mind," Sanzo swatted Goku again. "Go draw a pretty picture around Hakkai."

"Can do!" Goku beamed and bounded away to start drawing Nazca-like lines around Hakkai's still form. Sanzo kept watch over Aka, though his eyes had begun to droop with weariness.

Something in him told him it would be wrong for him to be away from the boy. Whether or not either knew it, each needed the other.

* * *

"Do you want to live like this all of your lives?" Gojyo recognized the wheedling, nasally voice coming from his lips as he faced two hanyou crouched around a fire in a refuse bin- it was much like the voice of the child he'd heard before, but older, mature, more adult.

"The hell are you talking about?" One of them grumbled.

"I mean, do you want this for yourself? Do you want to live in garbage and filth, fighting for your every meal like rats over poison?" He snarled, opening his arms. "Or would you rather rise and demand we be treated with the respect afforded everything else alive?"

"We ain't never deserved no respect," the other hanyou replied.

"Why not?" He stood upright. "If you are cut, isn't your blood red?" He pulled a bottle from the trash heap and smashed it on the wall, then jammed it into the inside of his elbow. The two other hanyous grimaced, as blood dripped from the gouge. "Our blood is redder than theirs," he whispered. "And just think, if we had the guts to hold our heads up, we could rise upon these heretics and lowlifes."

"You're insane," the first hanyou muttered, shaking his head.

"No, you are." He clenched his fists and held them in front of him in determination. "You've given up when there's nothing holding you back but the hatred of humans and our own solitude. Rise and come with me." He gestured wildly around him. "I have crawled these streets, this city, and taken everything it has to give and some it doesn't, and I for one am not afraid to throw its hatred back at it! We will be the start of the revolution, and we will rise on Heaven." He reached his hand out to them, his blood still pouring off his wrist. "Stand and join me, and we'll raise our voices until the gods can no longer ignore us."

"He's crazy, but he might be right," the second hanyou said to the first, and he got to his feet. Standing, he was large, broad-shouldered, and built like a bull. "What's your name, and what's your plan?"

"My plan? It's simple. I'm going to raise an army of red blood and rise on Heaven to demand what we deserve. We're people like all others, with red blood, with wants and needs." He lowered his eyes and smiled slyly. "We will unite and make our way to Heaven to make our demands, and if they don't listen, we will oust those pitiful celestials. If I would do this-" he held up his bloody arm- "just to get your attention, imagine what I'd do to them." The other hanyou rose to his feet as well.

"And the name?"

"It is a name befitting a street rat like myself- Nezuoh." Nezuoh smirked madly, eyes alight in the fire and brightened with his ambitions. "We need able men, three thousand at least, and we will begin here. We begin with this place, and the rest shall fall around it."

"Whatever you say, Lord," the ox-like hanyou agreed with a sly smirk.

"Not Lord. Call me King."

Gojyo knew it. He had known this was where he had started, he had figured out the second he heard that voice, the second he'd felt that cold, bony hand holding his chin. But why? How was he seeing it?

_You rat bastard, what the hell are you trying to do?!_

* * *

**End Notes:** Yeah, I'm glad I had a chance to explain the whole "seeing into the soul" thing. Neat little side effect, right? The question does remain- what is it a side effect of?

So, next week, I'm hoping to post an omake episode. It'll be a nice little breather, as I promise, things get kicked up in a BIG way in chapter 13.

So, in short:

Did you enjoy it? Review! Did you not enjoy? Review!  
Constructive criticism? Please review!  
Questions? Concerns? Review!  
Predictions? Anything you'd like to see? Review!  
Anything? Review! Nothing? Review anyway!

Until next time!


	12. Omake 1: Cooking Papa

**King Rat, No Mercy**

**Author Notes: **I'm embarrassed to admit this: I got on a big kick last week and finished typing most of my notes on the story, but I had trouble writing this omake! So yes, no major plot this week, just a little bit of fun with Kenren and the boys.

Review responses!

Guest- I hope they get to be a happy family again too. I love Kenren, he's too awesome for his own good.

RodiSquall- If you ever get confused, just ask! I hadn't explicitly explained it, I probably should have. My bad! Also, fixed the mistake, thanks again for spotting that.

D-Chan- Thank you and you're welcome! And yes, Nezuoh is meant to be hated. I don't think I've ever had so much fun making a character that the audience is just supposed to outright hate.

**Disclaimer: **Still own nothing. Thanks to RodiSquall for the original idea for this chapter. Ura Sai.

Without further ado!

* * *

**Omake 1: Cooking Papa**

"Happy birthday, guys!" Kenren chirped as he threw the curtain open. Both Aka and Ryuji looked up from under their blankets, confused. It seemed far too early for Kenren to be awake or waking them up.

"Big brother, how long have you been awake?" Ryuji asked sleepily.

"Since yesterday." Kenren beamed. Aka wrinkled his nose.

"You smell like a brewery. Were you out with Tenpou all night?"

"Yeah, we were celebratin'! Though, I might still be-" Kenren pivoted on his heel and promptly tripped over Ryuji's pillow. "Okay, definitely still a little drunk from last night," he continued, face down in Ryuji's blanket. He pushed himself back up and jumped to his feet. "But I've totally still got you presents and ca-" He stopped. "Shit! Cake!" He bolted into the kitchenette and began to look over the boxes. Ryuji and Aka spotted badly-wrapped packages, a bouquet of yellow and blue flowers, and quite a few empty sake bottles, but there was not a single cake box to be found. Kenren laughed nervously. "Okay. Cake. Not here. Don't panic." He dug through his pockets and pulled out his billfold, but it was completely empty. "Oh man, oh man." Kenren took a deep breath, and grinned. "Well, now's a good a time as any to try the recipe Tenpou gave me!"

"Tenpou gave you a cake recipe?" Aka repeated dubiously. "But Tenpou's a terrible cook."

"Well, yeah, but he's been trying to learn, so he's got a ton of cookbooks!" Kenren chirped as he went to the stack of magazines and began to rifle through it. He pulled out a sheet of paper. "I mentioned that I wanted to try and learn how to make you guys cake for your birthday, and he copied a recipe for me." He looked over it. "I got some ingredients together to practice, but since we've been working the past few days, I didn't have a chance. But how hard could cake possibly be? You just put it in a bowl, mix it up, and bake it." He frowned. "Hey, you guys have any idea what a 'baking soda' is? Eh, I have club soda, that'll probably work..." He pulled a ragged apron from somewhere in his pantry and pulled it on.

"I'm gonna go get Tenpou," Ryuji whispered to Aka as Kenren began to dig for ingredients. "I'm getting a bad feeling that this is going to end really badly."

"Don't leave me!" Aka whimpered, grabbing onto Ryuji. "He's gonna burn the house down, it's gonna take both of us to put the fire out."

"Oh, you guys have no faith in me!" Kenren laughed as he opened the bag of flour. "Huh. It says 'two cups.' What kind of cup?" He shrugged and pulled a mug out of the dish rack. "Hey, go on and get washed and dressed and stuff, you know I've got this covered!" He beamed at them. The twins cast doubtful looks at one another.

"Don't leave him alone," Ryuji murmured to Aka, and he slipped towards the bathroom. Aka whined to himself but went into the kitchen beside Kenren and dug out a box of puffed rice cereal. He poured himself a bowl as Kenren tried to pour flour into the mug and instead got most of it down his shirt. He giggled and dumped the flour into a large bowl. He hummed cheerfully and began to crack the eggs into the flour. Aka watched, morbidly fascinated and munching on his cereal, as Kenren squinted at the recipe.

"Hey, the hell is a tibusp? Or a tisp, for that matter." He scratched his head. "And where the hell am I gonna get three-slash-four of them? Does that mean three or four, depending on how much we like? I mean, I like vanilla..." He opened the bottle of vanilla extract and sniffed it. He them put his finger in it and gave it a taste. "Oh hell yeah!" He grinned. "This stuff is like straight alcohol! I'm gonna put four tisps in, I bet that'll be awesome! As soon as I figure out what a tisp is." He looked a little further down in the recipe. "Ohh, teaspoon and tablespoon... I have one kind of spoon. Eh, it can't be that different." He took a soup spoon from the drawer and measured four spoons' worth into the bowl. He then added two spoons of fizzy club soda from a bottle. "Butter... butter..." He turned back to the icebox. "Crap, did I seriously forget butter? Wait, here we go." He pulled out a white container. "Yogurt's made out of milk, just like butter! I'll just use a little more, and it'll be fine."

"But big brother, yogurt and butter don't even taste the same," Aka protested weakly.

"But they're both milk!" Kenren countered happily. He looked back at the recipe. "A whole cup? So, I guess I could use two cups, and that'll be a good substitute." Before Aka could protest further, in went two mugfuls of yogurt. Ryuji came out of the bathroom, dressed and toweling his hair.

"How's it going?"

"Do we really have to eat it?" Aka asked him urgently.

"Aw, come on guys, cake is awesome! That's why we only have it on special days, right?" Kenren turned around and beamed at the twins. "If you don't eat it today, you won't get any until my birthday. And if you don't try it, you won't get any ever." His smirk turned into a glower. "Got it?"

"Got it," both boys agreed, and gulped their terror down. Aka passed the cereal box to Ryuji and went to take a shower. Ryuji sat down to watch Kenren, munching on the cereal.

"Okay, so, butter and flour in a round pan..." He took out a frying pan and frowned in thought. "I don't have any butter. And the yogurt's gone. Nobody'll know if I just put flour in there!" He tossed a handful of flour into the pan and swirled it around. "Wait, did I turn the oven on?" He knelt down to the oven and examined it. "Fuck, the pilot light's out. Hang on, I need to go turn the gas back on, I don't think I've used this thing for like two years." He went to the utility closet by the door, and Ryuji took the opportunity to take a peek into Kenren's bowl. He grimaced as he saw what Kenren had put into it- he couldn't help but compare it to a witch's brew like in a story Tenpou had given him. Somehow, the bubbling flour and yogurt made him prefer the frog's toes and puppy-dog tails from the story. Kenren came back, and beamed when he saw Ryuji there. "Are you trying to help, bud? You don't have to, it's your birthday and all! I've just got to mix it up now." He rolled up his sleeves. "Step back, this is a man's job!" He began to stir the mixture with his bare hand, splattering wet flour down his shirt and splashing it into his face. Ryuji winced and put his face in his palm.

"B-brother..."

"Yes?" Kenren beamed, and Ryuji sighed.

"Never mind." He backed out of the kitchenette and watched from near the table. Kenren continued stirring, humming happily to himself. He poured the mixture into the pan, but stopped when he thought of something.

"Don't we need frosting?" He thought aloud. "Eh, I'll take care of that. I'll be back in a few minutes!" He put the pan in the oven and turned back to Ryuji. "Just leave it there." With that, he left, whistling cheerfully to himself as he strode down the walk. Aka returned from the shower, still toweling his hair off.

"He's gone?"

"Said something about frosting."

"Quick, destroy the cake-bomination!" Aka suggested anxiously, grabbing onto Ryuji's shirt and holding him at arm's length. "If we toss it out now, we might live to see thirteen!"

"Calm down! Kenren'd know it was us if we did," Ryuji sighed. "Let's just play Go until he comes back. Maybe it'll actually be good."

"Ah, you're too optimistic!" Aka moaned, but Ryuji just shook his head and dragged him out of the kitchen.

The twins broke out their Go board and pieces and began to set up the tiles. After a few minutes, they began to smell something vaguely like cake, but with an unusual bitterness to it. Aka continued to whine and cringe, but Ryuji rolled his eyes and ignored it. After about half an hour, the door opened and Kenren dragged a half-dressed Tenpou in.

"- so, jelly and water makes fruit glaze?"

"It makes perfect sense to me," Tenpou replied with a yawn. "Happy birthday, boys." He dropped a pair of packages next to them and stumbled into the kitchen. His hair was uncombed, his shirt was buttoned unevenly. Ryuji picked his package up and shook it- it rattled slightly. He peeled one corner of the paper back and saw what looked like part of a domino set. Kenren, still unusually energetic, grabbed out a jar of jelly and added water, then put the jar on the stove. Tenpou peeked into the oven, sighed, and slammed it shut. "Well, I suppose it looks cake-like."

"Hell yeah, it's cake-like! I followed your recipe almost exactly!" Kenren grinned.

"Almost?" Tenpou frowned. Ryuji and Aka both opened their mouths to try and explain, but before they could, the jelly jar cracked open and its contents sizzled down into the flame. Kenren and Tenpou both swore and began to try and quell the fire.

Ten minutes later, the mess was cleaned up, Kenren managed to get most of the singed sugar from his sleeves and Tenpou rescued the "cake" from the oven. It was sunken-in in the middle, and brown and crispy around the edges but almost black where the side of the pan touched the back of the oven. When Tenpou turned it out onto a plate, the room suddenly smelled bitter. Curious, he cut it open. The inside of the cake was soggy and almost runny. "Kenren, what did you put in this?" Tenpou turned towards him, his usual smile unshaken.

"Oh, y'know, this and that," Kenren chuckled nervously. "Well, since we don't have to frost it, let's dig in!"

"Wait, why don't we wait until after lunch?" Aka grabbed Ryuji's hand desperately.

"Yeah, it's too early for cake!" Ryuji added.

"Because I wanna see how it turned out!" Kenren beamed. The brothers turned to Tenpou, but he shook his head.

"Also because after you three try this little slice of hell, it's going to the birds." Tenpou smirked evilly, and the twins both moaned in disappointment. Kenren, however, drew himself up tall and proud.

"Man, you guys are lucky Tenpou's not making you wait!" He grabbed a knife and cut himself a sliver of the cake. "You gotta try it too, and you'll take that shit back!"

"Oh, no. Do tell me how it is, though. I'll just go get your first aid kit now." Tenpou strolled from the room, whistling to himself again, as Kenren handed a chunk of the cake to each boy.

"Well, I guess if we die..." Ryuji sighed. Aka gulped nervously, and finished:

"We go together!" All three tossed back their bite of cake at the same time.

Kenren, Aka, and Ryuji were out of commission for a week. Tenpou is still unsure as to how someone can give themselves severe acid-reflux-like stomachaches alongside apparent antacid overdoses. He kindly deigned to nurse the trio back to health, only lamenting, "Perhaps in a future life, one of us will know how to cook." Kenren still does not know what went wrong, but is totally sure that he'll get it right next time... If Tenpou ever lets him near the stove again.

* * *

**End Notes:** I hope everyone enjoyed this little break from the drama and got a good laugh. As it goes, I actually know quite a bit about baking, so I made every effort for Kenren to do pretty much everything wrong. I call it Amagi-style cooking! (Bonus points if you get that reference.)

Since I have you here, I wanted to offer a quick stat rundown on the boys.

**Ryuji:  
**Hair: Blonde, straight.  
Eyes: Blue.  
Height: 134cm (age 10), 157cm (age 13), 170cm (present.)  
Build: Scrawny as a child, lean but muscular as a teenager.  
Birthday: October 11 (Or, 19 days into Libra.)  
Favorite Food: Apples. Least Favorite: Chilled soups.

**Aka:  
**Hair: Red, curly.  
Eyes: Deep red.  
Height: 127cm (age 10), 153cm (age 13), 165cm (present.)  
Build: Thin as a child, more stocky as a teenager.  
Birthday: October 11  
Favorite Food: Dim sum. Least Favorite: Peaches.

Next week, we pick up on the plot again! But until then...

Did you enjoy? Did you not enjoy? Review!  
Comments? Questions? Review!  
Suggestions? Things you want to see? Review!  
Did you laugh? Let me know! Do you want to see more like this? Say so!  
Do you know how to break a Solitaire addiction? Please let me know.  
Anything? Review. Nothing? Review!

Until next week!


	13. Fall Rats

**King Rat, No Mercy**

**Author Notes:** Aaaand we're back! Happy belated Halloween, everybody! Man, did this week feel long. I hope everyone enjoyed our little intermission; with any luck, I should have another one ready for the next time we need a little break.

Review responses!

RodiSquall- Glad you got a laugh! Lucky for me, the worst mistake I make when baking is mixing up baking powder and baking soda. (And I'm working on being a professional!)

DarkDragonAlucard- Ding ding! Bonus points for you! (I love that game.)

D-chan- I'm happy you enjoyed! Those three are terribly cute together.

But all good things...

**Disclaimer: **I don't own most of the characters, I'm not profiting, but the original scenario and characters are mine!

* * *

**12: Fall Rats**

**(Suggested Track: "The Great Beyond," REM)**

Happy. Too happy. Insanely happy. Playing soccer with Kenren and Aka. Studying under Tenpou's tutelage and reading his books. Learning combat skills and sparring with Aka and some of the younger members in Kenren's division. Playing Mahjong until Kenren flipped the table. Konzen watching them on days Kenren and Tenpou were away, thrashing them at Go and Mancala every time they played. Eating a terrible cake on an autumn afternoon and still enjoying it. Counting the stars under an apple tree, two little brothers and one big brother, side by side by side, as happy as anyone could be. Kenren's voice echoed in his mind:

"See, guys, that one there? That's the North Star. If you can find it, you'll always be able to find your way. Even if you're lost, even if you're scared, if you see it, you'll know what's north, and you can figure out west, east, and south from there, and you'll find your way home. Remember what it looks like, and what its friends look like."

"Why do we need to remember what his friends look like?" Aka asked from somewhere far away.

"Because he's nothing without his friends. You wouldn't recognize him all by himself, right?" Kenren laughed. Gojyo blinked slowly and the stars blinked back; his heart was warm. His own body felt far away, Ryuji's contentment nesting warm in his chest. His mind freewheeled through the darkness. He was happy, so happy, but it wrenched his heart because he knew it couldn't last.

He blinked into the light as Kenren was opening a box with a very nice cake inside, grinning eagerly. "Tellin' you guys, this is gonna be the best cake you've had yet, I got chocolates on top and everything!"

"Chocolates?" Aka cocked his head. Kenren beamed as he handed him a slice.

"Chocolates are prettier than strawberries when you can't see red, right, Ryuji?" Kenren fluffed Ryuji's long hair. Gojyo noticed that Aka looked more distinct from Ryuji now- his jawline was a bit wider, a bit more square; his hair curled and stuck up in odd places. He tried to smooth some of his bedhead down with his hands, but it was uncooperative. Ryuji's hair had grown out straight and neat, parted just off the middle of his head. "I got some good news for you guys! Since you're thirteen now, you're formally considered soldiers. You'll be going on your first mission tomorrow!"

"Tomorrow? Really?" Aka bounced in his seat. "We're coming with you?"

"Damn right you are!" Kenren beamed. "You have a small but really important part to play, Kanzeon Bosatsu specifically made the request of Goujun that you be allowed to do this." He had a plate with cake on it for himself, but he seemed to be ignoring it. "You guys are going to be in charge of carrying and setting a sealing stone. Big business, right? I know you've got the heads for it. You'll have your weapons, but you shouldn't have to use them."

"Who's our enemy?" Ryuji asked, scooting himself closer to the table and Kenren.

"Eh, some lowlife. Calls himself King Rat." Kenren shrugged. "I guess I can brief you now, so listen up." Aka and Ryuji both pushed their plates aside to listen. "So, this King Rat whackjob and his army recently demolished a town, and they've taken over the area for themselves and are building a fortress. Trying to found a nation for themselves, so it seems. Usually, Heaven wouldn't care about that, but he made clear that he wants to make a direct request of Heaven, so he and his full army intend to march on the mountain. We're going to try and negotiate with them. Kanzeon Bosatsu's willing to hear him out, but he'll need to leave his army behind. If he's unwilling to play ball, we have to banish them. That's where you come in."

Kenren took a map from his pocket and unfolded it on the table. "If shit goes down, you guys are in charge of setting the sealing stone in the center of the assumed battlefield." He pointed to a spot marked with a cross directly in front of the structure sketched on the map. "You drop it right here, about ten kilometers in front of the fortress doors, and say the incantation. Pretty easy, you know, 'O Merciful Goddess,' something, something, something." Kenren waved a flippant hand. "Tenpou will tell you the specifics. Aka, you're in charge of that. Ryuji, since you're my tough guy, you need to protect him. Then, one of you has to give the signal- me and Tenpou are going to tell everyone what to listen for, once we figure out what it is- so we all know to drop whatever we're doing and haul ass out of there. The seal we're using doesn't discriminate who or what you are; if you're in its range, it's going to suck you up, and that's the last thing I want. I won't be able to be at your side, but you're big guys now. I trust you." He reached out and rubbed their heads, and Ryuji felt warm inside. "Any questions?"

"Are we gonna have to live in the barracks now?" Aka asked, tilting his head up to look Kenren in the eyes. Kenren froze, and drew his hands back.

"Y-yeah." He folded his arms. "After the mission, you'll be soldiers, so you'll be expected to live in the barracks with the other soldiers. But, I mean, I'll still be coming for you every day to take care of you, make you breakfast and dinner, and you can still hang out with me all day! Plus, you guys are smart, you'll be officers in no time. Then, you can move to officer's housing, maybe even right back to this street. You're still gonna be my little brothers, no matter what." He unfolded his arms and smiled kindly at them. "I'll still love you."

"I love you too," Aka mumbled, looking down.

"Me too," Ryuji added, clutching his thighs under the table. He felt queasy; he no longer wanted his cake, even if the chocolates on top were pretty. Kenren laughed, breaking the silence.

"Don't sulk, guys, come on, it's your birthday! Birthdays are supposed to be happy! Come on, I got you presents! Wanna open some now?" Even though Kenren insistently held out his lumpy, crooked packages, neither boy could cheer up. They forced smiles as they accepted their new clothes. Ryuji sorely wanted to be happy, but the fear of losing Kenren made his chest ache.

That night, Ryuji and Aka lay on their mats, pretending to be asleep as Tenpou and Kenren stood in the front yard beside the window, drinking their way through bottles of beer and intensely smoking cigarette after cigarette. "I dunno what I'm gonna do, man," they heard Kenren grumble. "They're my boys, I don't like the thought of them living with a bunch of dudes who are gonna kick 'em around. Aka's still sensitive, and I don't want Ryuji going back to the angry brat he used to be trying to defend him. I don't care what Goujun says, him or the rules. They're still kids."

"Kenren, I think you're a bit too attached," Tenpou chuckled, though he sounded anxious. "Things will go as they have, they just won't be sleeping here. One would think they're stealing your sons." His voice took on a more serious tone. "You need to let them mature."

"You know..." Kenren sighed through a puff of smoke. "I think they are my sons. Not really, not actually- I even went through their files and checked. I had that tiny hope, maybe I had met their mom some night fourteen years ago, but it was no good. Seems even Heaven doesn't know where exactly they sprung from, but it's definitely not me. Even so, they're my kids."

They were silent for a moment. After a long pause, Tenpou started cautiously, "You call yourself big brother. Why?"

"Think about it. They never had a dad. I didn't think they'd accept a dad. But they each had a brother. They knew what a brother was, they liked 'brother.' But they needed a father. Whether or not they knew it, it was me." He lowered his head and laughed weakly to himself. "I fell in love with those bastards the second I laid my eyes on them. I might as well have given birth to them myself." Kenren slammed his fist into the outside wall, and both Ryuji and Aka shook. "I'd adopt them and kick them out of the army if I could!" He drew his fist back towards him, and stomped on the butt of his snuffed cigarette. "But they'd have no mother, and for whatever reason, that's just not allowed. It doesn't matter." He took a long drink from his bottle and lit another cigarette. "I can call them sons all I want, but they'll never call me Dad. And I can't call them back from service now, those damn kids made a deal with Kannon, and she'd probably get her ass chewed if she allowed them to renege. There's nothing I can do; my hands are tied. I'm just going to keep loving my boys as much as I can, at any distance, until they stop loving me and stop wanting me to love them." He spit hard on the ground. "And even then, I don't know if I'll stop. Hell, I ain't even gonna doubt it- I'll never stop."

Ryuji felt Aka grab his hand from across the middle mat, and heard him whisper, "Let's never stop."

"Never ever," Ryuji agreed in a whisper. "Not for a thousand years, at least." The two clasped hands tight, and stared at the ceiling for what felt like a very long time.

**(Suggested Track: "Hero of the Day," Metallica)**

The next thing Gojyo was aware of was an unusually hot sun over his head and rubble under his feet. Ryuji and Aka were in formation with one of Kenren's platoons, walking in the center of a three-by-five group, Ryuji in the row directly in front of Aka, surrounded by other soldiers. Their armor was loose, as it seemed they had none that would fit them quite right, and they both wore heavy steel helmets. Between them, they carried a heavy black slab. Ryuji held his halberd with one hand, easily lifting the load with his free right hand, and Aka had his long staff strapped to his back and carried his end of the slab with both hands. General Kenren and Field Marshal Tenpou were leading the march, two squads ahead of them in the marching order. Ryuji tried hard to fix his gaze on Kenren's back, but it was far away and there were too many men between them. It wouldn't make a difference anyway- he wouldn't be able to talk to them like he normally did. He wouldn't be allowed to reach out and mess his hair up, he wouldn't call him "kid" and swear like he wasn't one. The distance was palpable.

Past the ruined city, as they came up the crest of a hill, they began to see a great, gray fortress with high windows and walls and obnoxiously large red banners hanging from the windows, abuzz with activity. Men in enameled red armor were practicing marching formations on the stretch of dark ground in the fortress' shadow. Kenren made a few quick hand motions in the air, which Ryuji recognized as formation instructions. He watched for the third set of signals- his squad was supposed to be at the center, in the middle. The soldiers around him began to shift into their position, still covering Ryuji and Aka.

"By the Merciful Goddess," Aka swore quietly. "They're all hanyou."

Gojyo knew he was right, though Ryuji's eyes were blind to the fact. Four thousand strong, as Nezuoh had told him, and at least a thousand of them were on the parade grounds in front of the fortress. Kenren's force was a pittance by comparison, no more than two hundred. This is a wash, Gojyo thought, they might as well surrender now. Still, Kenren smirked bravely as they marched up the ridge and held at the cusp of the crest. One of Nezuoh's sentries spotted them, and shouted back down to the others. The men practicing stopped in place and turned slowly towards the little army, some reaching for their weapons. Kenren held aloft a white flag and moved forward. He waved for his troops to follow him. One of the hanyou who seemed to be leading the others came to the forefront to meet them. He was thick and loaded with muscles like an ox, and something about him seemed familiar to Gojyo. He and Kenren began to exchange words. Ryuji could hear none of it, but soon saw Kenren turn directly around to Tenpou and made some unfamiliar hand signals- he made a fist, then patted the top of it twice. Tenpou turned and rushed through the platoons and approached Aka.

"They want to talk to one of their kind. You are the only one in our force. Both of you, come with me." Aka hefted his side of the stone towards Ryuji, and Ryuji carried it against his chest and followed Tenpou to the front of the order. Tenpou stood in front of Ryuji, shielding him from view, as Kenren whispered quick instructions to Aka. He patted his back, and he staggered forward. Aka timidly stopped in front of the ox-like man, looking up at him. He yanked off his helmet, his bright red hair now clearly visible.

"So there is one among you," the man grumbled. He turned towards the fortress. "Milord, they brought one of us!"

Gojyo knew the face that emerged from the postern, the high cheekbones, the slender neck, the catlike smirk. His hair was shorter, his skin brighter, but it could be nobody but Nezuoh. "So you do allow our kind into your little marching band." His bright red eyes glinted in the sunlight. "What is your name, boy?"

"I am called Aka, lord." Aka bowed his head.

"Aka? Could they think of nothing more creative?" Nezuoh's laughter was such that Gojyo expected him to snort. "And tell me, why exactly are you over there and not over here?"

"Aka-" Both Kenren and Ryuji started forward, but Tenpou halted them with an outstretched hand.

"He won't be swayed, he's loyal," he reminded them curtly. "Don't be afraid for him."

"He's alone over there," Ryuji growled. "He can't do this alone." He pulled his right hand into a fist, as Aka did the same with his left.

"I am in the army of Heaven because I was welcomed there. I don't know you. What is your purpose for marching on Heaven?" Aka asked evenly.

"We wish to offer our prayers directly, and expect immediate redress of grievances." Nezuoh folded his arms. "Is that so much to ask?"

"No, it isn't." Aka shook his head. "Lord-"

"King Rat, boy." Nezuoh's nostrils flared.

"King Rat. Right." Aka's leg shook, but he straightened himself up. "I am- we are your welcoming party. We wish to escort you personally to the seat of Kanzeon Bosatsu so that you may make your offering."

"Offering? Are you asking for an offering? Why need I do that?" Nezuoh's upper lip curled, gesturing to himself arrogantly.

"It's customary. Even something small is enough. A prayer scroll, a small portion of rice or food, women leave shoes-"

"Why should we have to offer anything to claim what is rightfully ours?" Nezuoh cocked his brow and smirked confidently. "Look around you, boy. This fortress- my seat on this earth- came about from my will. My army- assembled on my word alone. My men would fight their way to the ends of the Earth if it would restore honor to all of our kind, and if that is what we must do, so be it!" A cheer rose from the assembled troops. Aka considered him for a long moment as he waited for them to quiet again. He eventually retorted:

"And yet you cannot spare a single shoe as a token offering?"

"Fine!" Nezuoh snarled, flecks of spittle landing on Aka's cheek. "I can spare a shoe. How will your measly ten score be escorting us?"

"I think you misunderstand me," Aka murmured in measured tones, nonchalantly wiping his face with his right hand. His balled left hand gripped itself tighter; Ryuji could tell he was starting to wear down in King Rat's toxic presence. Still, Aka continued, "We only intend to take you, sir. You do not need four thousand voices to appeal to a goddess. You are their leader, you can speak for them all."

"Preposterous!" Nezuoh roared, and his soldiers began to shout back in outrage as well. "Who are you to tell me how I pray?"

"I am a soldier of Heaven and a servant of the Goddess." Aka finally looked Nezuoh squarely in the eye, holding his head up straight. Red met red. "This is what Heaven is willing to offer- a chance to speak to Kanzeon Bosatsu one-on-one, in exchange for your army remaining here, or we will halt you here and only your soul will ever see the Fragrant Mountain." He released his tight fist. "Those are your options."

"Why would you work with them, boy?" Nezuoh demanded, his voice soft but loaded. "You realize Heaven is responsible for your suffering, don't you? You did suffer, I can see it in your shaking limbs. The gods didn't have to mark the circumstances of your birth onto your face and head. They didn't have to punish you for the supposed sins of your parents. What could possibly possess you so that you'd oppose one who wished to change your life and make you whole?"

"The world may look unkindly on hanyou, but the Goddess has been kind to me," Aka answered, his chin up, his expression firm. "Heaven may have taken my mother in childbed and given me a thousand fathers who all hated me, but they allowed me a brother and a new father who love me dearly! I can ask for no more than that."

"You mean you honestly don't want all of your race to be treated with kindness? Have you no loyalty?" Nezuoh was struck with disbelief.

"The way we are treated is unfair, but I have still offered you a chance to ask for change. As for my loyalty, where was my race when my mother died and I was abandoned to a monastery of humans who hated me?" Aka frowned, and the creases matured his eyes. "My race did not claim me when we ran from there. You certainly never reached out to me before this moment. Heaven fell before me and held their hands out, and my prayers were answered. I owe the hanyou race nothing. Humans and gods alike have been both colder and kinder to me than any other. I have only apathy for hanyous." Aka folded his arms. "I'm sick of you stalling. We made you an offer. Accept or reject it." He glanced behind him to Kenren, who gave him a thumbs-up. King Rat looked down at Aka with merciless eyes nonetheless.

"I make you one final offer as well. Join your race, and we will rise on the damned celestial lords like a red tide, or be caught up and drowned. I hate to kill one of my own, but if you will stand in my way, you leave me no choice." Nezuoh and Aka's eyes would have set fire to the air if they were any hotter. Aka clenched both of his fists and made his decision:

"You and your army can march off the edge of the earth straight to hell for all I care. You dare ask me to turn my back on my brother and father? I'm no traitor!"

"And you can shove your milquetoast offer down your stinking gullet!" Nezuoh roared and pulled three thin slips of paper out of his sleeve. "Men, to arms!"

With those words, the army of King Rat descended on the army of Heaven. Nezuoh made to throw the talismans at Aka, but Kenren and Tenpou jumped in from behind and intervened. "Go, boys!" He shouted, catching the talismans on the barrel of his pistol and throwing them off. He began to fight Nezuoh back, using his pistols as clubs and kicking and pushing to hold him off. Tenpou pulled his katana and tried to keep other soldiers from getting between Kenren and Nezuoh. Ryuji wove his way through the rush to get close to Aka, still carrying the stone. Aka took one end, and Ryuji carried the other. The two didn't have to talk, and they pushed their way to the front of the fortress. All around them, their comrades fought to hold back the massive numbers of hanyou, but they were severely outnumbered. In the midst of the panic, they dropped the stone flat, and Ryuji pulled his glaive and stood at Aka's side.

"Quick, we don't have much time!" Ryuji yelled, but his voice was lost in the calamity. Soldiers with red armor spotted them and moved towards them, and Ryuji swung his glaive precisely to disable each one, using the flat of his blade as much as he could. Aka lay his hands on the slab, biting his lip and trying to focus.

"The words, the words... I, I can't remember!" Aka cried out in frustration. "Ryuji, the words are gone, I can't remember!"

"Aka, you have to try!" Ryuji barked, sidestepping around Aka and the slab. He whacked a soldier back from Aka with a hard crack to his skull. "Kenren's depending on you!" Aka's jaw hung open as he scrambled for words, but he pressed his hands to the sealing stone again and began to pray.

"O Goddess, hear my prayer..."

Ryuji grinned proudly- Aka was starting to regain his footing. Gojyo could tell how frightened he'd been for his baby brother, he could feel the relief spreading from his head to his chest- until someone grabbed him by the neck and raised him off the ground.

"What the hell do you think you're pulling?" King Rat snarled, his face a mirror of a rabid dog. Ryuji tried to look for Kenren, and spotted him frozen in place on the ground with Tenpou carrying him to the sidelines. Nezuoh tossed Ryuji aside, and Ryuji tumbled onto his front and pushed himself up as Nezuoh advanced on Aka. "You dare use your profane holy power on me?!"

"... answer my call!" Aka pressed his right hand into the circle drawn in the center of the seal. Ryuji caught his breath and shouted into the air:

"Red is green!" His voice echoed over the noise of the fighting, and the soldiers that did hear him began repeating the retreat call for those who didn't. They began to turn tail and flee, the men that had been fighting them laughing at their supposed cowardice. King Rat, however, was fixated on Aka, and grabbed the boy up. Ryuji roared and rushed to get him loose from Nezuoh's grasp. Nezuoh was taller than Ryuji, and able to hold Aka by his neck far above his head. Ryuji began to swipe at Nezuoh's chest with his glaive, but he dodged back and kept squeezing Aka's throat. "Let go of my brother!"

"This is your brother?" Nezuoh sneered. "You lie." He clamped his hand tighter around Aka's neck. "Tell me what you just did and I'll let him go." Aka struggled and tried to grasp at Nezuoh's wrist, and Nezuoh throttled him around to disrupt his efforts. Aka tried to cry out, but his voice was barely a squeak. Ryuji felt ten years worth of anger rush forth, a dam broken in his mind, and he screamed and rushed Nezuoh in a berserk rage. He pushed Nezuoh's chest and reached and tried to wrest Nezuoh's arms down, even as the sealing stone began to emit a dark light. Nezuoh bandied about to keep Ryuji back, Aka still held up, Ryuji still trying to get him to let Aka loose. None of them saw the dark black shadow spreading across the ground below them, too fixed on their struggle. Kenren had regained motion, and stood out of range, screaming something indiscernible over the taunts of King Rat's soldiers. Ryuji heard a bare whisper of it:

"- Get out of there! Come on, run!" Ryuji turned and saw Kenren waving his hands over his head and screaming. He broke away from Tenpou and began to run towards them. "Boys!"

Suddenly, the world vanished. The sky was dusty and gray, and they were soaring down, plummeting from Earth to below. Ryuji reached out and managed to grab and hold tight to Aka as the rest of the world fell away.

They didn't sense when they landed, but felt everything else landing around them. Even the obnoxious castle was swallowed and spat up from the ground where they lay, side by side. Nezuoh was flat on his back beside them, stunned, and Aka hugged onto Ryuji.

"Bro, I'm sorry," he whispered, his throat raspy.

"Don't apologize. I'm sorry. I was supposed to protect you." Ryuji embraced Aka tight, until Aka started coughing and he had to let him go. They sat up and began to look around. "Man, we got in it deep this time." King Rat slowly got to his feet from where he'd landed, panting for breath in the sticky air.

"You... you brats..." He grabbed both of them by their armor and hoisted them up. "What did you do?!"

"Isn't that obvious?" Aka chuckled. "We sealed you. You're between the realm of humans and the realm of demons. Exactly where you belong."

"But... but..." King Rat sputtered indignantly, his hands shaking.

"And we were sealed too, with the rest of your pathetic army. You will never reach Heaven from here," Ryuji concluded, smiling ruefully. Nezuoh roared and threw them both down.

"You fools! Did you see me as that much of a threat?! I don't deserve this!" He tore at his hair.

"You were marching on Heaven with four thousand men. Of course you're a threat," Aka muttered. More and more of Nezuoh's men were sprouting from the ground like red cabbages, some sprawled on their hands and knees, some flat on their backs. "You had a chance to avoid this. You could have taken our offer. But you would have rather had your own way-"

"Would Heaven have listened to one man speak for his whole race?" Nezuoh rubbed his forehead. There was no anger in his voice now, only despair. "Nobody listens to the noise made by one man... by one small boy... I have waited for years!" He threw his hands skyward. "Years of abuse, years of patience, all for naught! All I wanted was to be able to have children!" This stung Ryuji and Gojyo, as Nezuoh's eyes filled with tears. "I wanted children of my own, to love, to treat well, to show how to love and treat others well. To make this world a kinder place for hanyous, to give my child the happiness I never had." He sobbed into his hands. "Gone...! Never...!" He screamed wordlessly, and his piteous cry shook the sky itself. He turned to the boys with dark eyes, filled with vengeful malice. Gojyo could feel his aura turn from red to black. "Lock these two wastes of flesh up!"

Reminded of what he was dealing with, Ryuji hardened his heart. "We're not sorry," he growled. "You selfish bastard, it's because of you we don't have a father anymore!"

"General Kenren," Aka whimpered, as though he'd forgotten and remembered. Nezuoh ground his teeth together, before forming a wicked smirk.

"Is it really?" His eyes took on a maddening gleam. "Or was it your stubbornness?" He turned to his men, as Ryuji, shocked, considered his words. "We will leave this place! No seal can hold back blood as red as ours!" The men rose a battle cry. Aka turned towards Ryuji as two of his soldiers grabbed them.

"I just remembered something." Neither boy struggled as they were escorted away, and King Rat began to shout about how they were going to make themselves ten times as good as they had been for the day they walked the earth again. "I made a mistake, in the sealing spell. I didn't invoke the specific Goddess. It's not going to be complete."

"Then maybe we still have a chance," Ryuji whispered. He clenched both fists in defiance. "We'll get back to the place where we were loved. Kanzeon Bosatsu always keeps her promises."

Gojyo felt himself drop back. The darkness surrounded him, and though he felt his dreams calling him, he couldn't let himself fall into them. He knew the feeling of falling, he felt Ryuji's fear, he felt all of his pain. He felt Ryuji's loss, and it hurt. However, he felt Kenren's pain just as strongly. He couldn't imagine losing his sons. It made his gut ache with fear, and he began to think hard of some way he could pull advantage over King Rat.

What do I know now that I didn't know before? What can I do to him with neither weapons nor force that will give me a trump card?

He could only think of one thing- love. King Rat wanted love, and he was going to get it.

* * *

**End Notes: **And we have seen the face of our villain, the man under the mask of madness, the- sorry, I've been watching one too many movies.

Next chapter has some of my favorite stuff in it. I'm really excited to finally be able to share it! But you have to wait because if I had my way, I'd post the rest of the story all at once and then I'd have nothing to do every Thursday night.

By the way, I know you're not here for this kind of stuff, but if you are an American adult, as I am, be sure to vote next week! Your voice matters.

With that said!

Did you enjoy it? Review. Did you not enjoy it? Review!  
Questions? Comments? Review!  
Did the ETB spellcheck miss something again? Review!  
Love? Hate? Review!  
Suggestions? Something you want to see? Let me know!  
Anything? Review. Nothing? Review for the hell of it!

Until next week!


	14. Labor Lost

**King Rat, No Mercy**

**Author Notes:** Unlucky thirteen! (Technically.) I will mention that this chapter, particularly the first scene, ties pretty heavily to the first story, and particularly to chapter 8 of the first story. I'm guessing if you got this far, you have read it, so with any luck you'll know what I'm making references to.

Three of my favorite scenes are in this chapter, accompanied by three of my (current) favorite songs. Also there are only three scenes in this chapter. Oh, I have been excited for this one.

Review responses!

KaKashiisWifey- Thank you! I hope I continue to satisfy.

D-chan- Don't worry, you're supposed to hate him. One of these days, he'll get what's coming to him, I'm certain.

RodiSquall- Oh, Kenren has no idea. If only he knew, right?

**Disclaimer: **Nope, still not mine.

* * *

**13: Labor Lost**

**(Suggested Track: "Save Me," Gotye)**

Flat on his back, Gojyo woke at last, staring at the beautiful, hideous ceiling. Dirt fell from between the stones and rafters, sprinkling his body with dust. He knew his body was in hell, of this he was certain, but his mind had to go elsewhere. If King Rat wanted love, he'd have to use that to gain the upper hand. He thought about love, and realized he'd never really considered it as a solution to anything before. He knew he'd only known it in tiny tastes. He tried to think hard back to the moment when he'd felt the most love, just to establish some baseline for him to work from.

His stomach squirmed, as he remembered he'd been wearing a dress. It was a basic design, woven black cotton with lace trim. He had stolen it and stuffed it down his shirt earlier in the day, with the intention of returning it, and he'd stuffed the top with tissues to fill in the bust. He'd wanted to feel normal for an evening, to feel like a normal pregnant woman, but dressing up hadn't helped. He wanted to go for a quiet walk alone, but Sanzo had thrown on one of Hakkai's spare shirts- one that Gojyo had gotten grease on, one that 'waste not, want not' Hakkai had dyed black- and put his robe and holy garments aside and followed him.

He had been at a nadir that night. He'd heard Hakkai and Sanzo talking quietly while he'd been getting dressed, though he couldn't hear most of it, he knew it was about him. He felt like a load, a burden, and he felt displaced. Even though he'd been back with his friends, he felt like he couldn't associate with them the same way. It had hit him that day- he was going to be a parent. He wasn't a bachelor anymore, he wouldn't be the same kind of man, someone else was going to need him. He had later learned that it was two someones, but at the moment, he had only thought about one. No matter what, he had to feed and nurse and teach and play with someone small who looked like him and a man who hated him. His entire life was going to be different. He'd spent so much time worrying about being pregnant that he'd forgotten everything that came after.

He was going to have to think of more than himself, more than his own selfish world. He had made his living gambling and gone hungry on nights when he lost, but with a kid in the picture, he couldn't do that. Even if his own stomach went empty for a week, two weeks, a month, the kid had to eat three meals a day. He had to put the kid through school, to make sure he got an education, and that would cost too. He'd have to get a job, but he had no real skills. Bounty hunting? No way. Who would watch him if he and Hakkai were away? If he died, who would take care of the kid? What if he died anyway? What if he got sick? What if the kid got sick? Gojyo had started imagining his child with blonde hair, and he'd imagined, over and over, how everything could have gone wrong. A small blonde boy, starving to death, riddled with pox and coughing his lungs out, or breaking his tiny bones.

Even worse, what if Gojyo couldn't take the strain of being a father, and reverted to the parent he remembered most- his stepmother? Kids were assholes, what if his took after him especially and was a complete brat? What if he lost his patience, started hitting his kid, screaming at him, tearing his face off? He had almost made himself physically sick when he pictured himself tearing his child limb from limb; he was sure he was going to be a heartless, soulless monster of a father.

He'd tried to run away. He didn't know where he was going to run to, because he carried his pain in his belly, but he wanted to run and run and run until his feet fell off and he collapsed into a grave. He couldn't, because Sanzo had reached out and grabbed him, and controlled his wandering mind. He hadn't been able to talk clearly to Sanzo that night, too afraid to expose his soft spot again. The last time he'd done that, Sanzo had grabbed it, squeezed it, and nearly tore it out. That had been the first time he'd tried to run away. But this time, Sanzo was patient, Sanzo was calm, Sanzo had seen through him anyway and still stayed by him.

_"Do you really want to pretend to care how I feel?"_

_ "No."_

In the moment, Gojyo had thought this a rejection, but Sanzo hadn't pushed him back, hadn't left his side. He later figured out that Sanzo had answered the first verb rather than the second- not that he didn't care, but that he wasn't pretending. Sanzo held him down and stripped off his false image, pulled away his illusory clothes, and held him without him asking. Sanzo had curled his body around his, placed his hand on his middle, and whispered tender words into his ear. _"No doubt, the goddess will provide."_ That was it. Even if he felt sick and weak and lost, he had received hope. Someone comforted him and offered a glimmer of light, and he had fallen for it, like a rat in a trap.

"Shit, I am in love, huh?" Gojyo mused, putting his hand over his heart. "Have I really ignored it all this time?" He thought back hard. Every time he'd submitted to Sanzo, he had done it because he wanted to. Sanzo's words rang back to him: _"Trouble me as you please. You simply need not call me anymore. I am here."_ It wasn't a confession, Gojyo hadn't deluded himself that hard, but he knew it had been a promise that yes, he would be there, he wasn't going to abandon him, and he wouldn't be denied any longer. And for that, he wanted to make Sanzo happy and keep Sanzo happy. Because that made him happy. "Damn. Damn, damn, damn. I don't remember giving you permission to love him." He jabbed his thumb into his heart. "Shit. Well, fuck it. If I am in love, then that's just what I'll do." He grinned to himself. "But..." His smile faded as his train of thought continued on the track: Does he love me? Sanzo had never said it. He probably never would, and this was assuming that he did at all. "No, no," he muttered. "I can't think like that."

He finally sat up and looked towards the wall, into the peephole to the next cell. Ryuji was leaned against the far wall, sprawled out. His clothes and hair were still wet from the drowning torture, but he looked like an neglected flower, skin like leather, eyes sunken. He had to deal with this before Ryuji withered away completely.

He gathered his piecemeal thoughts and began to try and come up with some way to deal with King Rat's advances once and for all.

* * *

**(Suggested Track: "Summers Lost," Hurt)**

Once awake, Hakkai examined Aka's body for more wounds. He found more than he expected, but most of them were already mostly healed. Aside from the stab wound, the massive bruise on his leg was the most serious. Hakkai put a splint on it, wrapped tight with bandages. After checking him over once more, Hakkai and Sanzo circled the area, looking for any signs of danger. Fortunately, they found none. Goku spent most of the day doodling massive patterns in the ground, creating a massive circle that reminded Sanzo of the wheel of reincarnation. He wasn't entirely sure it was unintentional, either, as Goku had doodled a Buddha, a pig, and a rooster in the middle. He had gone to trace a snake alongside them, but the light had faded and the wind had begun to dishevel the dust out of form. Goku didn't seem to mind terribly much, and began to make shadow puppets against the rising moon instead. As the moon rose, they lit the fire anew, and Hakkai went to check on Aka again.

Aka had slept on and off most of the day, still wrapped in the clothes they could spare (including Sanzo's robe, Hakkai's sash, and Goku's poncho), unmoving, unable to move. He sweated and panted as though the robe laid atop his chest was an anvil. "Please... no fire..." Aka breathed. "They're attracted to fire... alcoholic moths... where there's fire, there must be booze... or outsiders..." Sanzo discreetly kicked some dust onto the fire to dull the flame. Between the cold, dry wind and the chilly night air, the fire was all that kept the goosebumps from their skin, but Aka's panic convinced him. Hakkai joined them near the fire and warmed his palms.

"Someone should sit with him. He doesn't seem to wish to speak to me." Hakkai didn't have to look twice to know that Sanzo had risen and left to sit at Aka's side.

"You don't have to," Aka groaned. His whole body undulated as he tried to fill his lungs. "I'm fine. Be on my feet by morning."

"That's not why he's concerned," Sanzo muttered. "He's more worried about your mind than your body."

"What, he thinks I've lost it?" Aka rolled his eyes. He was still shy of breath. Sanzo started to reach for a cigarette, but stopped and instead rested his hands on his knees.

"He can tell you've been agonizing over something. He'd like to give you some relief."

"Is that it?" Aka frowned, and reached up to push his hair back from his eyes. "I'm really worried about my big brother, okay? I try not to think about it, but-"

"If you say so." Aka stopped, as Sanzo dismissed his rationalization.

"You don't believe me."

"I do." Sanzo took a deep breath and sighed it out. "And I understand you. Truth be told, I've been trying to ignore my own pain over our missing party member. I never imagined your anger was any more profound than that."

"You've seemed... calm." Aka sounded surprised, but Sanzo didn't know him well enough to determine if he was being sarcastic. Instead, he shook his head.

"I tend to try and keep such things under the surface, if you understand. And yet, you have reminded me, every time I look at you." He took a deep, bracing breath, reached into his back pocket and extracted the creased, folded paper. He unfolded it, held it at an angle where it caught the light and showed it to Aka. "These are my sons."

"You have sons?" Aka squinted up at the photograph in curious disbelief. It was wrinkled and scratched, but the image was still clear enough to see: Gojyo sprawled on an inn bed, tangled in a sheet, mouth open as he snored, with a fair-haired infant laying against his shoulder and a red-haired infant resting his head on his stomach.

"They are mine, yes. They are my greatest and best mistake. I may never have asked for or expected them, but they arrived nonetheless and I am happy to call them mine." Sanzo turned the photo back to himself, looking at it again, and turned it back towards Aka. "The tall man you see, he's their mother. That's our missing friend. They belong to both of us. They were a present from the goddess."

"Huh... she gave you a miracle, huh? And you didn't ask for them? Even a little?"

"Not to my memory, no. But if given the choice..." Sanzo paused, curling his fingers around the paper. "Perhaps, before meeting them, I would have refused, but now that I have met them, I would be a fool to say no. I wish nothing but happiness for them." He folded the photograph away. "They are the reason I ache. I blamed you for reminding me, and I believed it was because of that man."

"We're both hanyou, I suppose it makes sense."

"No, you look like my Eiji." Sanzo folded his arms. He felt a twinge in his chest, and a sensation that many others would have recognized for shame. Aka's eyes widened.

"Eiji?"

"The little boy with the red hair. Ten minutes younger, one-fourth of a kilogram heavier. His hair was already curly, much like yours, and his face was round. I have seen and heard nothing of them in over a year." Sanzo lowered his gaze. He wished the wind would consume him. "It's wrong to miss him, as I know he is safe and waiting for my return. Seeing you wears my confidence down. As such, I have treated you unfairly. I hope to remedy this in the near future." Aka was silent, focusing on the moon.

"Your older son...?"

"His name is Yohei. Have you heard the name before?" Sanzo's brow creased- he was still curious as to why Aka had cried the name out in his anguish.

"Those names... they're known around here. Nezuoh, he was searching for a hanyou that bore children. Yohei... Eiji..." Aka swallowed hard. "Maybe... maybe he meant your friend." Then, Sanzo heard something unexpected- laughter. "Small world. Yohei and Eiji... and you say that they're yours, too." He chuckled, but he looked ready to cry. "What a strange, small world we're in... it's like Fate just looks to slap me around. Don't you see?" His eyes closed. "Yohei... Yohei..." He whispered the name under his breath, and Sanzo held his breath as he drifted off to sleep. He rejoined Hakkai and Goku and promptly whipped the photograph back out again.

"I found it folded in my sutra a little less than a year ago now. I did not take it. Nor did either of you, as we do not own a camera." Hakkai examined the picture, gently tilting the corner to catch the light.

"Perhaps some sort of divine gift?"

"That was my suspicion," Sanzo agreed. Goku leaned closer to get a good look.

"Yo-chan and Ei-chan! They're cuter than I remember!" He turned his focus to Sanzo again. "Why did you hide it from us?"

"I didn't think it important for you to know about such an insignificant trinket. I don't check what you carry in your pockets," Sanzo muttered, and Goku swallowed hard.

"A trinket?" The smile had left Hakkai's face. "This is a photograph of your sons. This is no mere trinket."

"Muichimotsu. Hold nothing dear. All the world's a trash heap, nothing in it means anything. I could lose that paper this very moment, rip it to shreds, toss it to the wind and will have neither lost nor gained anything for it." Sanzo was quiet, as Hakkai balled his fists. "But I do not think it wrong to hold any one person dear. I would not want to forget their faces."

"Ah." Hakkai quickly smiled again. "And did you forget them?"

"If either of them came to you tomorrow," Sanzo started pointedly, "Would you know them?"

"How would they do that?" Goku wondered. "I mean, they couldn't walk or anything, and I don't know how they would have gotten down here."

"Regardless." Sanzo bit the word off like it tasted foul.

"I would not, no," Hakkai answered. "It has been a year now, hasn't it? A year yesterday. They were three days old." Hakkai looked away, towards the dry horizon. "I do recall that they were both rather soft, with small noses and chubby cheeks, as infants tend to. I imagine they'll look more distinct as they age."

"You're wrong. They're distinct now." Sanzo narrowed his eyes to thin slits, in thought rather than frustration. "Yohei has a longer face, his nose is just a touch more thin. Eiji has broader features. I have taken their faces to heart. On the day they are returned to us, even if the Goddess was mistaken, if they have aged, I intend to know them." Sanzo put the photograph away. Goku cooed to himself, in admiration of Sanzo's attention to detail. Hakkai, however, seemed to have more on his mind. Sanzo could tell from his cocked head and inquisitive smirk.

"And you have pored over it since our arrival here because you began to forget them?" Sanzo turned away. "Ah. No. Is it that you have suddenly begun to miss them?" This brought Sanzo to turn back around and fix a cold glare on Hakkai. "Or perhaps it is the third one in the image-"

"Silence," Sanzo hissed. Goku, however, didn't seem to get the message.

"Do you miss Gojyo?"

"There is no point in that. We know he is here, and worrying does us a disservice," Sanzo dismissed coolly.

"But it's still okay to miss him. You can't help how you feel." Goku was about to continue, but flinched as Sanzo slammed his fist down on his knee.

"I will make this clear- I do not wish to have this conversation."

"Well, tough!" Goku found the strength to scowl at Sanzo. "You know, you always push everything down and hide it, but it doesn't change the truth! You can't help how you feel, dammit!" Goku looked ready to reach out and grab Sanzo, but instead pushed his hands down onto his thighs and ground his teeth. "We're your friends, and if you're hurting, I wanna know! I wanna share that with you so I can make you feel better! I wanna help you! If you miss him, then miss him! I miss him too!" Sanzo drew the harisen from his pocket, but Goku slapped it away. "No, you can't just shut me up! If it was you that was gone, we'd hate ourselves every second and fight that much harder to save you!"

"We're not asking you to stew in it," Hakkai interrupted, touching Goku's shoulder as if to tag him out. "We only ask that you deal with it and not treat it like you're ashamed of having emotions. After all," Hakkai paused, his smile serious as he concluded, "Are you really going to act that cold to your kids?"

Sanzo gripped his fists around his thumbs until they went numb. "You idiots," he managed to snarl, but could find no other reply.

"If you no longer want that picture, then give it to me. I'm certain Gojyo will appreciate it." Hakkai held his hand out, but Sanzo slapped it away.

"I will keep it until I have no further need for it," he grumbled.

"Then we shall have to overturn every stone until we've eliminated that need," Hakkai concluded, and folded his hands behind his head. They were silent for a few minutes.

"I'm hungry," Goku mumbled. "Not really, or anything, but I feel like I should be."

"No wonder you're acting like such a child," Sanzo remarked caustically. "I'm going to sleep." He picked himself up and moved from the fireside into the dark. Further from the fire, the air was even colder, but he could see that Aka was sweating rather than shivering. He lay on the hard, flat ground, resting one hand under his head and pulling the photograph out again with the other. Hakkai and Goku had started to sing some overwrought campfire song, but he tuned them out. In the dim light, he could still make out the details of the image.

His chest ached. He could hear someone, somewhere, screaming his name. _"You need not call me anymore. I am here. I won't let go. I will never let you go." _His own words laughed cruelly at him, and an awful, nagging voice rang from the back of his head; "You're pretty terrible at this, aren't you?"

The wind began to howl.

* * *

**(Suggested Track: "Somebody That I Used to Know," Gotye. **Two Gotye songs in one chapter? Theming what now? The Glee cover would be appropriate, as much as I vastly prefer the original. Your call.)

The door opened, and Gojyo held his hands out in front of him. He felt like a trained dog, but he ignored the notion and pushed it down in the hopes his doubt wouldn't break him. The guards trotted him out and down the hall with little prodding. His knees wobbled under him, though he couldn't see them, but he tried hard to lock his joints and fix a stern look on his face. He had a plan now. He found all his bravery rising in him as the noise of Ryuji's coughing behind him quieted and ceased. He steeled himself in the silence, scaling the stairs as though his leaden feet were air. He let the guard take his cuffs off, open the door, and shove him in, but he was so used to it now that he barely stumbled. Sanzo was sitting on the cot as usual, legs sprawled open, elbows against the wall. The black shirt he wore was disheveled on his shoulders, the pale skin of his chest exposed around his tight undershirt; candlelight shone on his tight pants, highlighting every contour of his legs. Gojyo swallowed hard and choked back all of his worst instincts. Sanzo seemed to notice.

"I can just tell what you want," he said with a smirk.

"I don't care what you think. I'm not interested in anything you have to say to me." Gojyo folded his arms and looked away from Sanzo. Sanzo slowly pushed himself up and began to pace around the table, closer to Gojyo. Gojyo paced in the same direction, keeping his gaze focused on the floor and maintaining his distance. Sanzo chuckled and stopped, and Gojyo froze as well, as far away from Sanzo as he could be.

"You lie. Of course you do. It's all you're good for." Sanzo smirked. "Tell me what's on your mind."

"You. Just you." Gojyo narrowed his eyes and shuffled his feet. The last of his footsteps echoed against the close walls. "I think I've got you figured out."

"What, you understand me? Do tell." Sanzo wore a face like he was holding a piece of candy over Gojyo's head. "How could someone as oblivious as you-"

"Because I know you. I know you in all the worst ways." Gojyo refused to meet his smoldering stare. "If you're going to pretend to be him, I'm going to treat you like him."

"I told you, I'm as real as the stones we stand on."

"I don't care what you are. You say you're Sanzo, so I'll treat you like Sanzo." Gojyo tried to keep his cool, to keep his voice calm, and began. "Sanzo, I don't know how to tell you this, but I think you're in love with me. Or, you think you are. And you're wrong." Gojyo found the courage to face Sanzo, and let some of his quiet anger show. "I know you try and pretend affection when we fuck, you pretend friendship when it's convenient for you, and you say some pretty things, but you don't love me. You love the idea of me. You love that I offer you a family, one that will love you without you even having to try, because that's something you never had. You envy me. And that's your goddamn problem."

"And what makes you say that?" Gojyo couldn't read Sanzo's tone, but he was definitely listening now.

"You don't know how to love." Gojyo forced a glare onto his face, and Sanzo began to look sour. "You don't know how to touch me, or talk to me. You're afraid to. And I already know it's futile to try to get you over that. And no matter how sweet you act to me here, you'll never convince me that you can be anything more than the cold-hearted jerk you are." Gojyo crossed his arms across his chest and smirked- he couldn't help but feel a sense of triumph. He'd won. That look on Sanzo's face told him that he had- but why was Sanzo now grinning too?

"Is that what you honestly think? No. Still you lie." The smile wiped from his visage and he suddenly looked very ugly. "I don't know how to love? Of course I do- everyone and everything does. I just choose not to love you." Gojyo gritted his teeth, curling his toes like he could root them in the ground. "You couldn't think I'm that aloof, not knowing how to give and receive love. I just don't want yours."

"No, I know you don't know how to love. I've tried to show you, but you just push me back." Gojyo's shoulders were rigid as he tried not to break. Sanzo shook his head slowly, and the creases on his face deepened.

"If that's so, how do I love my sons? Both you and Hakkai have seen how I adore them. I love my children beyond words." His droopy eyes bored into Gojyo's face, and he felt his resolve weaken. "But you? I have no words for you." Sanzo's eyes held no levity, none of his playful teasing from before. Gojyo hadn't even realized it, but his hands had tightened around his chest as pain began to sting his heart. "Do you know why I rejected you while you were carrying my children?" Gojyo couldn't respond; his heart thrashed against his ribcage. "Because you were useless to me. I was only ever interested in you for sex in the first place. You were an embarrassment. Why would I want to fuck an abomination against nature like you?"

Gojyo couldn't hold it back. "You fucking bastard, I'll-"

"More empty threats," Sanzo cut him off harshly, and reached into a pocket in his haori and pulled out a cigarette. "The thought is loathsome to your core- no matter what I say to you, you don't want to really hurt me." He pulled a lighter from his pocket and lit the cigarette. "Idiot." The smell of cigarettes set a fire ablaze in Gojyo's mind; he knew the smell, it was the same brand Sanzo usually smoked. His mind was flooded with memories of that smell- he remembered smelling it entwined with his own smoke in their afterglow, or whenever they had a minute alone together. They didn't talk, they smoked. He would know the smell in his sleep. Sanzo blew smoke through his nose, and Gojyo could feel him start hammering at his conscience as he stood, catatonic, entranced by the smell of burning tar.

"How many times have I lied to you? How many times have I lied to others about you? How many times have I looked you in the eyes and denied you? And how many times did you keep crawling back, desperate for just a whiff of me?" He drew himself up, and Gojyo felt like he was towering over him. "I pitied you, you fool. I pitied you and took pity on you. Oh, I remember well the closest I ever came to feeling anything for you. You were still useless for sex, but you were so desperate to gobble my cock that you dressed as a woman to get my attention- did you really think that I'd be less embarrassed of you if you were an ugly woman rather than a faggot man?" This wound stung, and Gojyo gripped his chest with his right hand and balled his left. He couldn't think of anything to say, but his fist shook impotently, his body stiffer than a corpse. Sanzo kept going, his calm, even voice droning each syllable into his eardrums. "I try to cut you off like a gangrenous limb, but you beg and plead with those watery eyes of yours. You sick freak. You beg me to hurt you, how can I help but enjoy it?"

"That's..." Gojyo searched for a reply, cold sweat drenching his back. He had begun to feel dizzy. His insides twisted, his belly thrashed, and he felt weak. "You... you bastard..."

"And you were the one who started it, too. 'Stick it in me.' You ask me to violate you, and it sickens me every time I do it."

"That's enough!" Gojyo yelled, and he reached forward and threw the table aside, one less barrier between them. The candle and bottle on it clattered onto the ground, the candle's flame dying against the wall, the bottle rolling under the cot. "You still do it, don't you?!" His voice lowered, he tried to shut his emotions back down. _I can't be weak like this, I can't let him see it._ "We- we still do. You wouldn't have sons if it weren't for that."

"Am I so inhuman as to deny myself an easy orgasm? It's funny, really." Sanzo took another long drag off the cigarette and slowly, slowly exhaled. The smell of smoke washed over Gojyo again. "I use you like you used me. Karma rewarded my pain with pleasure, and it rewards you with pain. Pain threefold my own, for every time you hurt me. And oh, how you hurt me." Sanzo's narrow eyes and thin lips held absolutely no sarcasm, and Gojyo felt his glare like a knife twisted in his chest. What little strength he had left was suddenly gone.

"F... fuck..." He hung his head low. "I... that's not what I want for us." He dragged himself towards Sanzo, arms limp at his sides. "I don't want us to go back and forth like children swapping toys. I don't want to do this anymore." He froze within arm's reach of Sanzo. "Why can't we just love each other? Why do you have to hate me?"

"Love you? Hate you?" Sanzo sounded unimpressed as he tossed the cigarette butt aside. Gojyo couldn't even react, as his hand suddenly snapped out and seized him by the chin. He tilted his face and forced Gojyo to meet his eyes. The air and his breath still reeked of cigarette smoke. "Listen closely: I will never love you, and I don't have the energy to hate you. I feel nothing for you."

"Stop talking." Gojyo felt each word drill into his heart. "I don't want to hear it!"

"I don't want to touch you or talk to you. Your touch makes my skin crawl, your scent nauseates me, and I tire of the very sight of you."

"Shut up. Shut up!"

"You have never been worth my time. You are a worthless waste of air and water. You're so vain about your pretty face, but your innards ooze with festering mold and maggots. Your soul has rotted from the inside out!" He pulled Gojyo even closer, and Gojyo could smell the cigarette smoke still rolling from his lungs onto his tongue, making every word he said more poisonous. "I have always thought so. I always will."

"Stop! Please stop!" Gojyo begged, struggling to get loose. "I don't want to hear your words! I don't want to know anymore! I'll do anything!" He tried to pull away, but he couldn't. He couldn't even bring himself to cover his ears.

"You know you're not worth even a millisecond of my concern, and I have no reason to bother with you. But I made a contract with you, and whether or not I tore it to bits, it stands. Until the day you reach Enlightenment and see yourself for the vermin you are, I will carry out my duties. I will rape your soul until you see the light." At this, Sanzo released him, and he dropped to the ground like a bird with an arrow in its breast. He could not find a single word of denial, no reprise that could negate any of it. Everything rotten in his soul had just been spilled onto his face, and it left him in shock.

Sanzo stopped briefly at the door, turning cold eyes over his shoulder. "Numb yourself if it stings too much. The pain will not go away until you acknowledge it." Gojyo didn't have the will to rush at the open door, and it shut and locked as Sanzo left. He managed to crawl to the cot and felt around under it for the bottle. He could feel a small crack forming on the side, but didn't care. He felt too numb to do anything else- he couldn't cry, he wouldn't. He opened the bottle, gulped some of its contents down, and instantly felt dizzy.

He couldn't deny anything Sanzo had said, and it was all burned into his head with the smell of cigarette smoke. This was the Sanzo he knew, the Sanzo in his nightmares. He couldn't deny it anymore, and it hurt. This was the kind of pain that could never go away, there was no salve for this burn. He could only numb the pain. He took another deep drink. His head became light and his body felt heavy, and as he slumped onto his front, drifting into the dreaming once more, he could only ask: "Why?"

* * *

**End Notes: **… Ouch.

A few production notes: That last scene is where this whole story started. Whenever I heard that song on the radio (and it got a lot of radio play) I always pictured the complete disintegration of a relationship and the utter emotional ruination of the non-aggressor party. I ended up filling in all the blanks with Sanzo and Gojyo, and then realized that I left quite a few blanks in King Rat to fill in. I had the basic scene written out in my head, right down to Gojyo flipping the table and dragging himself towards Sanzo, asking him to love him, before I even fleshed out the rest of the story, and after that, the rest fell into place. I had started to write Aka and Ryuji's story years ago, but never finished it, and I was never satisfied with it. I knew I had to incorporate it. I also had to give Sanzo and Gojyo a relationship, if it can be called that. I also had to answer the question: Who is King Rat?

Language notes: I usually don't use Japanese terms, but I did it three times in this chapter. I am so bad. "Yo-chan" and "Ei-chan" are just the diminutive nicknames Goku has assigned the boys. "Muichimotsu" is a Buddhist precept without a concise English translation, and one of the only ones Sanzo follows. It literally means "Hold nothing," and it's a directive to form no attachments to the material world. For example, it's probably why Sanzo uses a disposable lighter rather than a refillable one like Gojyo does. It does not, however, forbid attachments to people (though Sanzo has used it as an excuse to avoid bonding with others.)

I think that chapter 8 is probably my favorite part of King Rat (alongside the last two chapters), so when I re-read the story, I knew I had to revisit it. I will also make note that this is not my favorite chapter. I don't have a favorite chapter, but this one is definitely up there. If I had to pick, I'd say it's either this one, 16, 17, 19, 20, or 21. Screw it, the final third of this story is my favorite part. I just can't wait to share it with you all!

By the way, did you know that smell is the sense most strongly associated with memory? Think about it. You can probably remember the smell of your mother's/grandmother's/caretaker's homemade cookies/waffles/pretzels from your childhood just as much, if not better, than what they actually looked like.

We're not even close to finished yet. However, next week's chapter is especially short. I might try to beef it up a little bit more, as I have one more idea I want to include, but it's not going to be even close to my usual length. I made the choice to separate the next scene (and its lead-up) into one chapter rather than lumping it in with the preceding or following parts as an artistic decision, but I have to ask you this: How mad are you going to be at me? Should I post two chapters next week to keep everyone satisfied, or should I just roll with it as it is and post the chapters on the regular schedule? (For the next short chapter, there will probably be two chapters that week. I will either include it as part of the chapter before it, or maybe just post the chapters one after the other. Opinions? I'm leaning towards the latter option, because I feel that the content of the chapter needs to stand alone, but we'll cross that bridge when we get to it.)

Wow, I've got a lot to say down here. So! Next week, you can have one or two chapters. Whatever you suggest, I'll probably go with, so I do need your opinions!

Long story short:

Did you enjoy this chapter? Review! Did you not enjoy? Review!

Comments? Questions? Suggestions? Something you want to see? Review!

Opinions on chapter postings? Review!

Anything? Review! Nothing? Review anyway!

Thank you all for your continued support! Until next week!


	15. Ryuji

**King Rat, No Mercy**

**Author Notes: **Here we are again! I'm glad we've made it through the week. The opinions I got from your reviews are kind of split on how to do the next two chapters- so I decided to split the difference. I plan on posting chapter 15 this coming Monday, followed by chapter 16 next Friday. Call it sort of an early Thanksgiving present from me to you!

Review responses!

KaKashiisWifey- Oh yeah, I always feel bad that Goku's role in this story is relatively small. Unfortunately, it's hard to make him operate on the levels that Gojyo, Sanzo, and Hakkai work on when it comes to interpersonal relationships. I had to give him something awesome to do. After all, sometimes, the best solution is the simplest, and Goku is nothing if not simple.

Anonymous guest- I do tend to build slowly, but I hope the payoff is worth it! I'm also glad my basic mastery of the English language impresses! (Though I'm sure that's less common than it should be.)

Dragon77- I probably would have gone with that, but in addition to a lack of consensus, I also had a pretty heavy workload this past week. I hope you enjoy the chapters anyway!

D-chan- I know in my case, I can't smell certain laundry detergents without instantly thinking, "This smells like my grandparents' house." Weird, but I can't break the association. It's especially hard since they're gone.

RodiSquall- I'm glad you enjoyed the "tease and reveal." Even Sanzo would want to hold onto something like that. Also- UGH SPELLCHECK WHYYYY. I really oughta put the names in my dictionary to prevent that in the future. And I'm glad you're enjoying the music! I still get a little teary listening to "Summers Lost." Just don't go broke on account of me!

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything, but if I did, I wouldn't have to work Black Friday, that's for damn sure.

* * *

**14: Ryuji**

_ My darling boys, I know you fare poorly, but I bring a message of hope... So long as you still hold your hands out, I will never abandon you._

The firelight was especially red as Gojyo, through Ryuji's eyes, stared at Aka over it. The two were together in the twilight silence. Aka had some sort of small mammal skewered on the end of his spear- maybe a rabbit, or a squirrel- and slowly turned it over the flame. Every once in a while, Aka's eyes darted around. The fire lit his face enough for him to see his rounded, broader features. He looked almost nothing like the boy Gojyo had seen through his eyes before- he was a little thicker, his hair wilder: older, but it was deeper than that. His eyes held none of the life they had before. He was most certainly fifteen now, if not very close to it, but he had lines creasing his forehead more akin to an old man's. He jerked the spear as he shivered, and crimson blood splattered from somewhere inside the little creature.

"Be careful," Ryuji murmured. "You'll make a mess."

"Sorry. Wasn't trying to." Aka's voice was sharp, rough, and just a bit gruff. He seemed to be very withdrawn from Ryuji, hunched over, curled around himself. Ryuji's shoulders slouched with disappointment.

"Brother, are you thinking about what he did again?"

"Shut up," Aka mumbled, and Ryuji sighed. He looked back up at Aka, studying his features for some clue of how to ease his mind. The firelight sparked up for a moment, flickering and catching Aka's blood-red eyes. Ryuji felt a jolt run through his whole system.

"Come into the light more." He stumbled close to the fire, and Aka frowned.

"What's wrong?"

"Your face- your face-" Ryuji gasped like he'd been splashed with cold water. Aka leaned closer, and Ryuji staggered around the fire and grabbed his cheeks. Aka quickly pushed him off, but Ryuji had looked into his eyes. His red, red eyes. His hair was red, too. The meat of the animal was red. Even his own skin looked less yellow. He understood what red was. "It's red. Red! That's the color red. That's your face, your eyes, your hair, me, and them, and everything. Red!"

"Have you lost your mind?" Aka gawked.

"Bro, I can see red! I can see the color red!" Ryuji reached and grabbed Aka's collar. "I can see it now- you're red!"

"Well, yeah, of course I am!" Aka tried to shove him back again, but stopped when he realized what Ryuji meant. "You mean... you can actually see it now?"

"Yeah." Gojyo could feel his cheeks hurting from Ryuji's smiling. "Don't you remember? The goddess... she touched our hands and said she would give us life anew! She said we probably wouldn't be the same. I'm not colorblind anymore- my new body, my new life, I must not be colorblind. She must have found some way to get us out that'd make everyone happy." Ryuji stood up, looking up at the sky. He held his hands up like someone was going to reach down and pick him up. "General!" He called out. "General Kenren! Father! We're coming home, we'll be okay! We promised you another five hundred years of our love and more, and I'm not going to give up on that!" He turned to Aka, determination welling up from his chest to the top of his head. "We're going to make it, Aka. We're going to live again! We're going to live!"

* * *

**(Suggested Track: "The Tain, Pt. 3," The Decemberists. Pt 3: 4:58-10:05)**

Gojyo opened his eyes to the dark ceiling again. It was night again, and the sounds outside were of a windstorm brutalizing the desolate landscape. He could feel the wind whipping through the bars and colliding with the unforgiving walls, harsh enough to flay his skin from his cheeks. The last of the illusion still echoed at the edge of his awareness and obscured the corners of his vision, but his heart ached. He couldn't get the smell of smoke from his mind, nor push Sanzo's words away. "S-Sanzo," he mumbled. "That's... that's what you think of me... I knew that. And I was a fool to think otherwise." His eyes were suddenly blighted with tears. "But... why can't you just hate me instead?" He heaved back a sob. "It would hurt less."

"Mr. Gojyo?" Ryuji's voice was incredibly faint. "Are you awake?"

"Yeah." Gojyo pressed his hands over his eyes and sighed. "What's wrong, kid?"

"I... I can't feel anything."

"What? Ryuji." Gojyo sat up quickly, and regretted it. His taut, round middle obstructed him and brought it back to his mind. He could suddenly feel it more intensely than ever, twitching, stirring with life, a heartbeat entirely alien pounding quickly against his stomach. "Fuck. Talk to me. Talk to me." He wiped the cold sweat from his forehead and crawled to the gap. The sway of his heavy belly made him nauseous. His shoulders shook as he stared through the hole. Ryuji was still slumped on the opposite wall, drawing slow, shallow breaths. "Ryuji, talk to me."

"I... I don't feel hot, or cold. I don't feel my clothes on my skin. All I feel... is pain..." Ryuji's voice sounded like cracking leather. "I feel like dust..."

"Fuckin' shit, kid, quit talking like that!" Gojyo pounded his fist on the floor. Ryuji's head slumped forward, his tangled locks falling limp across his face. His eerie smile chilled Gojyo to the bone.

"I'm sorry, Lady Kannon... I'm sorry, Tenpou... I'm sorry, Kenren... Dad... I waited five hundred years for... nothing..."

"No, no, don't give in!" Gojyo pleaded. "You're still here, it ain't over yet! You still have your spirit! Listen to me!" He put his mouth directly against the gap. "Hold on. Hold on one more minute. My friends- your brother- one of them is bound to come for us!"

"Tell Aka... Tell... Eiji... I'm sorry... He's... my little brother... I don't know what..." Ryuji's voice was barely a whisper, until he coughed hard and blood poured from his lips. "Do... without..."

"Then don't let him be alone! Be a responsible big brother! If he needs you, don't leave him!" Gojyo begged. His heart was racing- he only now saw just how thin Ryuji had become, just how little there was left of him. "Come on, kid, keep talking to me, stay with me, don't give in!" Ryuji's head shook very slowly. Blood still ran from his mouth unchecked, halted only by what short bursts of speech he could manage.

"I... nothing... can do... I'm useless... I'm sorry..."

"You're sorry?!" Gojyo exploded. He could only think of one thing to do, and he pounded his fist on the wall as hard as he could. "Is that all you can fucking say, you rotten bastard!?" He launched himself upright, pounding his hands on the wall and screaming at the top of his lungs. "Fuckin' talk, you little heretic! You rotten, worthless bastard! If you die here, then you'll have died with nobody loving you! Because nobody ever loved you! You were never really loved and you know it! And if you let yourself die here, then you deserved that!" Tears streamed from his face, salt drying on his cheeks from the wind howling through the window as he tried to think of more insults. Blood still poured from Ryuji's mouth, a few weak coughs sending it sputtering down his front. He was shivering in the wind, his whole body rattling. Gojyo's voice broke as he tried to raise it even louder, trying to rouse the boy, trying to cover the desperate sorrow in his voice with anger and hatred.

"Ryuji! Ryuji! Answer me, you scrawny twat! You dog-nosed cunt! Your brother is an abomination, and you should have been burned from the earth in your slut mother's piss-laden pyre! You're nothing but an ugly, childish son of a whore with a thousand fathers, none of which would even look twice at your face before spitting on it!" He felt a rush of pain to his gut, and his knees buckled, bringing him back down to the ground. "Come on," he hissed. "Hate me. Be angry at me. Tear down these walls and scream at me. Tear my skin from my bones! Anything. Show me you're still alive!" He ground his teeth and punched the wall again. "You shit-eating maggot... cowardly child... Fucking answer me, goddammit!" Ryuji laughed weakly, that uncomfortable, high-pitched laugh that didn't belong on his lips, and Gojyo felt his heart tear in two.

He fell to his elbows, and cried out: "Yohei! Yohei! I'm begging you! I love you more than I love life and the world and Sanzo, Yohei, and I'll slit my own throat if it means you'll live a second longer!" He scrambled through his pockets one last time and tried to tear out his own windpipe with his fingernails, but it was a hopeless endeavor, as Ryuji laughed one last time, coughed, and was silent. Gojyo couldn't stop begging for the boy to give him one last sign he was there: "Yohei! Ryuji! Yohei!"

Ryuji no longer moved, made no more noise. His body was perfectly still, only the slight movement of his filthy, blood-soaked robe in the cold wind any sign that he was anything more than a hallucination. His chest froze, his desiccated lips stuck in a sad smile. His right palm was open beside his limp thigh, ever reaching for his brother or father's hand. "Yohei..." Gojyo broke into sobs. "Yohei..."

The wind continued to wail against the walls, full of empty fury and signifying nothing.

Nothing.

Nothing.

Nothing.

It was all Gojyo had left.

* * *

**End Notes:** …

So, there'll be another chapter on Monday.

Let me know what you thought. Leave a review and check back for more!

Until then!


	16. Westward

**King Rat, No Mercy**

**Author Notes:** I'm still on a bit of a downer from last chapter. I felt dirty inside writing that... however, what's to come is, in my opinion, even worse.

I will note that in my 10+ years as a writer, I don't think I've come up with a villain I hate nearly as much as King Rat. His faux-affably-evil persona, his willingness to absolutely ruin people for his own desires (some of which is yet to come to light,) and his utter insanity? So evil. I'd like to think that he's a good villain just because he is so easy to hate, but if he weren't going about it in such an evil way, we'd sympathize with his cause.

Review responses!

D-Chan: I'd offer you a tissue, but I've already destroyed my box. Poor Ryuji...

KaKashiisWifey: Yeah, I'm pretty sure Gojyo has found a new low. I wonder how- or if- he's going to crawl his way back up out of it. Either way, shit is gonna go down.

RodiSquall: I'm certain that rotten King will get what he deserves. As for me, I'm sure I'll be editing chapter 16 while the turkey's cooking over here, while trying not to let my family look over my shoulder. (No, mom, it's not porn, leave me alone!) But hey, we'll all have something to look over while eating leftover turkey sandwiches.

**Disclaimer: **Outside of the original characters and scenario, I own nothing.

Without further ado!

* * *

**15: Westward**

"He's gone. He's gone." Hakkai sounded like he was trying not to panic as Sanzo shook the dust out of his emptied robe. Goku whined as he stared at the dried blood on his empty poncho.

The trio had woken in the morning after the windstorm had passed over them, and found their clothes dumped on the ground in a heap, weighed down with Aka's pack. Sanzo rubbed his forehead and pulled his robe back on. "He can't have gotten far." The inside of the robe had blood spots on it, but Sanzo didn't mind- he knew it would come out in the wash, and dry blood wouldn't hurt him. He was more worried about the fact that they had been left empty.

"I'm sure his injuries can't be quite healed yet. He'll reopen them if he's not careful," Hakkai murmured, running his hand through his hair and shaking dust from it.

"He was hurt pretty bad," Goku mumbled, and looked up at Hakkai and Sanzo. "You think they kidnapped him, or something?" He wrung his hands on his folded knees. "Or maybe not. Wouldn't they have attacked us?"

"No, they wouldn't. Didn't you notice? They didn't use their weapons on us before, only him," Sanzo observed.

"I was preoccupied, but now that I think about it, you're right." Hakkai's brow furrowed. "But the noise would have woken at least one of us, even if the wind was that loud. I'm a light sleeper, after all." He sighed. "I can only think he left on his own power."

"Didn't that one hanyou soldier say he hadn't cleared a path last time?" Goku asked nobody in particular. Hakkai and Sanzo both straightened up like they'd heard a gunshot.

"That explains a lot," said Hakkai, eyes alight with dark inspiration.

"Alright. How do we know which way he's gone?" Sanzo turned his gaze around the surrounding land. Any footprints had been swept away by the wind.

"I know which way he's gone." Hakkai looked at the ground. "I've been watching him, and I've been testing a few things. We are and have consistently been moving northwest."

"Northwest?" Goku frowned. Hakkai nodded.

"I've been comparing the villages we've passed to the ones on the map, based on the area Aka approximated we began in. I determined that he'd been taking us northwest, for the most part, since we began to move." Hakkai folded his arms and began to pace. "I checked it two nights ago, marking trees in all eight major directions with a different symbol. Once we reached one, I checked it against what I'd done. Northwest. I imagine he's going by landmarks as much as directions, but the only major landmark in the northwest area is-"

"The fortress of King Rat," Sanzo muttered, lowering his eyes. "Can you determine which direction is northwest?"

"I observed the shadows at dawn when he was determining our bearing the day before last." Hakkai studied the shadows for a moment, then pointed. "This should be correct." Sanzo and Goku quickly put the last of their things about them, and Goku took up Aka's pack. The trio jaunted northwest, leaving the sun behind.

It did not take them long- only half of a kilometer- to find signs of Aka, but it was not what they expected to find. They had hoped for footprints, something dropped, but instead found a body. A hanyou in armor lay still, staring at the sky, what skin was visible stained and bruised. Hakkai knelt beside him, examined the gashes in his legs and chest, checked his pulse. "Dead," he reported solemnly. Goku shivered.

"But- he said soldiers of Heaven didn't kill."

"I doubt this is his first time," Sanzo muttered darkly. "Don't be so horrified- we kill youkai when we must."

"But he's a kid. I thought he was a good kid, too," Goku mumbled.

They left the body where it was, knowing there was nothing they could do for the man, and continued on their way. They soon found another body, and Hakkai didn't have to check his pulse- the gaping hole where his esophagus should have been was indication enough. Thirty meters ahead, they found another, this one with his armor punctured and holes in his chest. Twenty meters after that, two bodies sprawled across one another, blood pooling under them. Then started a trail of cracked and broken bodies, three or four meters apart, none moving, most cold. They found one still twitching, laid on his side, but when Hakkai tried to roll him onto his back to examine him, they heard his neck make a sickening crunch, and he was still.

The bodies began to increase in number, groups of three or four, and Sanzo spotted an odd shadow on the horizon. "Was that mountain there last night?" He observed with a frown. Hakkai broke into a run, and Goku and Sanzo followed suit. The kilometer between them and the "mountain" was paved with the bodies of hanyou- Sanzo lost count at fifty-four. And yet, none of it compared to the stack of mangled, twisted flesh that rose from the dust. Bodies were piled high, three meters off the ground, surrounded by trails from where Aka had dragged them into place. Goku's balled fists shook at the sight, and Sanzo held back a nauseous wince to see Aka sitting atop his little mountain. His spear was slung over his shoulder, his skin and clothes as red as his eyes. He rested atop the body of an ox-like man, his head pressed into one hand as he mumbled something. Sanzo recognized it as a prayer for the dead. All three were speechless, until he rose and kicked his way down the pile.

"I'm sorry you had to see this," he said flatly.

"You don't sound sorry!" Goku snapped back, shoulders rigid like a cat hissing at a mouse.

"I don't? Sorry. I'm tired." Aka did seem weary, his eyelids drooping, his speech slurred. His body was wrecked, soaked with blood, but most of it was not his own. His face and arms were covered in cuts and bruises, but fortunately, none were too deep to disfigure him. Sanzo could only wonder what madness had possessed him to wreak such havoc and come away with nary a dismemberment.

"Aka, soldiers of Heaven can't kill! You told me yourself!" Goku shook his head in disbelief. "Why would you do this?!"

"To protect you. You said you'd help me free my brother. I can't allow harm to come to you. Besides," he smiled his sarcastic smile, "I don't think Heaven wanted me anyway." He took his pack from Goku and pulled out a flint. Sanzo realized he wasn't staring at a mountain, but a funeral pyre. He also realized why they hadn't seen any bodies up until this moment.

"You..." Hakkai grabbed Aka's tunic and knocked the flint from his hand. "You fool! You kill a few hundred men on injuries like yours and expect us to be pleased with you?! You'd tear yourself apart for three strangers?!"

"I didn't expect you'd be happy... but I'll do anything for outsiders," he mumbled, and laughed softly. Hakkai dropped him and turned away.

"Is this the first time you've killed?"

"No, I've had to before. Kill or be killed, that's the law here." Aka's voice was even and bored. "Ryuji always hated it, but I did it anyway."

"How many souls have been lost to you?" Hakkai was clearly holding back his ire.

"Including last night? More than five hundred."

"I wonder what would happen if you bathed in the blood of a thousand hanyou." Hakkai's scowl deepened. "Perhaps two thousand would be enough to make a monster out of you, or are you already halfway there with the blood in your veins?"

"I already am a monster. I'm... I'm sorry you had to see it." Aka dropped to his knees. "I'm sorry..." He began to rub at his eyes. "The general, the marshal, they're both gonna hate me for all this..."

"You did what you had to," Sanzo muttered in an oddly reassuring voice. He crouched in front of Aka. "You wouldn't have done it if you didn't have to. I believe that's the kind of person you are." He tried to place his hand on the boy's shoulder, but Aka shoved him back.

"Don't touch me!" He screeched, his whole body shaking. "Why do you want to touch me?! Your hands make my skin crawl! I hate the way you smell!" Aka dug his hands into his scalp and began to tear at his hair. "Please don't touch me. No! Please don't touch me, not there-" He spoke faster, his tone urgent, frantic. "No, Ryuji, no, Ryuji, no, Ryuji, no, I'm your brother, you can't-" He stopped abruptly, as Sanzo realized all the horrible implications of those words. "I'm... I'm sorry..." He was forcing himself to stop, his whole body shuddering. He gagged back his own spit, whimpering in an infantile voice, "Your hands are poison... I'm sorry..."

"Let's find him some water," Sanzo murmured, looking towards Hakkai and Goku. "He reeks of death." Aka sank to his hands, tears dripping into the dirt.

"Goddess, I'm sorry... Please forgive me... please have mercy..."

Sanzo dragged him by his shirt into the emptied village nearby. The remnants of a bonfire sat in the center, but Sanzo ignored it for a barrel of water near it. Hakkai and Goku kept their distance as Sanzo pried the spear from his hand and began to pour water over him. It cleaned the blood from his hair and exposed his new wounds. His stab wound was mostly closed, but had partially reopened. Sanzo bandaged it, and what few other slashes and cuts he saw. His exposed chest had some very large, deep bruises, but Aka didn't even flinch when Sanzo touched them. Hakkai moved to help a few times, but stopped when Sanzo noticed and shook his head. Somehow, it seemed right to Hakkai to let Sanzo deal with the boy. But Sanzo didn't scold or criticize; he didn't have to. Aka's very form seeped shame as Sanzo silently cleaned him off, pouring the rainwater onto his blood-coated body. Hakkai could no longer fathom the boy, his odd smiles, his hidden rage. He could only write his mind off as a wild card and keep moving forward.

Even if Aka was leading them on, he was taking them towards something, and it was the only clue they had.

* * *

**(Suggested Track: The Decemberists, "The Tain Pt. 4." Pt 4: 10:06-14:09)**

Gojyo was not certain when he had fallen asleep, nor when he had woken up. He wasn't sure when he had stopped crying, though he knew it was only because his eyes were too dry to weep any further. He wasn't aware of when the wind stopped, nor when the darkness had been swallowed by the light. He could only lay flat on his back, seeing but not perceiving the world around him. The universe was dead space. His stomach gurgled, drawing itself into a knot around his stretched "womb." He could feel the weight pressing into his spine, the pressure the only thing that was real. He tried to bore holes in the ceiling with his eyes. He felt whatever was inside him- no, he felt Ryuji twist and thrash against the walls enclosing him. The withered corpse was gone from the adjoining cell, but Gojyo could still feel his distant, blank-eyed stare, could still see his sad smile. Though light flooded the room, the darkness in his heart was devouring him from the inside out. Like a worm in an apple, like a parasite in the belly of a beast. And god, did it hurt.

He screamed aloud, his whole body quaking, as he tried to will his pain away. It didn't stop the agony. He futilely slammed his palms against the ground, like a child throwing a tantrum, then brought his fists down against his belly. "Out of me," he snarled, his sore throat making his spiteful voice rattle. "Out of me! Go back to your own body! Go back to being you! I don't want you!" The pain radiated through his every muscle, his body contracting around itself. It was enough to throw his arms to his sides and force him flat against the ground. His muscles shuddered uselessly, sweat beading on his hot forehead. Nausea rocked his stomach, and if there had been anything in it, he was sure he would have retched. He felt rancid and sick, like he was rotting on the inside. He was more sure than ever- nothing he could do now would bring him anything but more pain.

He slowly forced himself to a sit, his stomach still rocking, a wild ocean inside him. His knees were weak, his hips sore. The weight in his belly was like an anchor, dragging his head and heart down. He couldn't overcome it, couldn't push it aside, couldn't ignore it. He mustered up what little strength he had left, and let go.

"I give in!" He screamed at the door. His voice echoed, unanswered, his own words stinging his aching ears. "I surrender! I'll do whatever you want, just numb this!"

There was no response for a few minutes. He caught his breath, each inhale burning more. His legs shook. Finally, a pitchy, nasally voice glided through the door; "Is this so?" Gojyo almost doubled over in sickness when he recognized King Rat's true voice. "Anything I want?"

"Anything. Anything at all," Gojyo babbled without a second thought. "You can fuck me and use me for whatever dark purpose you want, you can keep me as a trophy of your prowess, you can rip your army from inside of me. Just end this hurt!"

"And what if I asked you to love me? What if I wanted you to come to me willingly?" His voice was almost taunting, but Gojyo swallowed the bile in his throat and forced an answer.

"I... I could learn. Promise me you'll stop using Sanzo's face, and I'll try."

"I never have and never will," Nezuoh acceded patiently. "And all you want is to be numbed?"

"To feel nothing," Gojyo insisted fiercely, lowering his eyes. "No more pain, no more pain. Let me sleep until I wither to dust, and I'll let you fuck this corpse 'til you're dust yourself."

"And that's a promise?"

"Y-yeah." Gojyo pressed his forehead against the door.. He no longer had the strength to hold his head upright. "Promise." He never felt weaker than when the door flew open, and Nezuoh opened his arms to him.

"Come, then. Embrace me." He smirked, tilting his eyes up and lowering his chin. He looked like some unspeakable beast smirking at its dinner. Gojyo still forced himself forth and let Nezuoh fold his arms around him. His bony, needle-like fingertips pressed into the thick of his middle. "You certainly ripened faster than expected. Rounder than a fall apple. How sad that you've bound yourself to that waste of a boy rather than the first new soldiers for my army in five centuries." Gojyo shuddered, trying hard not to rebel. Nezuoh's thin hand caressed his swollen flesh. "But no matter. Soon enough." Gojyo's chest ached, he wanted to scream, but he kept himself silent. Nezuoh was just shy of purring as he rubbed Gojyo's belly. Gojyo could no longer hold back hot tears, and he felt them flood his cheeks and aimlessly wet his shirt. Nezuoh clicked his tongue. "No, no tears, my pet. After all, I've already forgiven you."

"You've... forgiven me?" Gojyo couldn't hide his disbelief.

"For murdering your eldest son, of course." Gojyo froze at these words, how casually he'd said them, how thoughtlessly and callously he'd accused him. "But as I said, no matter." Nezuoh waved one dismissive hand. "He will be reborn, and he'll be mine. I've infused just enough of my soul into him to redden his blood. Nobody will hurt a pretty hair on his little red head." He plucked one of Gojyo's stray hairs and held it to the light. "And in this, your vicious sin will be forgiven. I am a kind god."

Gojyo was left speechless, could only glare, glassy-eyed, at the wall in front of him.

"But come along. You look like you could use some rest. You're going to need your strength." Nezuoh began to gently usher him down the hallway, away from the cells, out of the basement. He was only halfway aware of the four flights of stairs, barely taking notice of the guards who seemed to be trying hard to avert their eyes.

Nezuoh pushed a door open to a dim room. Gojyo only barely took notice of the walls lined with weapons, the desk covered in rolls of paper, the stacks of books, only really seeing the bed. He staggered towards it, but Nezuoh grabbed his shoulder to halt him. He picked up a shapeless, overly-long plain linen tunic from the door and pushed it into Gojyo's hands. Gojyo realized that his clothes were filthy with sweat, and he probably wasn't desired on the clean-looking bed. "Would you like to wash? I could have the guards bring you a basin and a cloth." Nezuoh sounded entirely genuine, and Gojyo could tell he was trying to be kind. Still, Gojyo couldn't talk; he didn't want anything from him but what he'd already asked for. With no words to say, he pulled the tunic down over his dirty clothes and warped form. It fell past his knees, almost to his ankles, and was large enough to accommodate his oversized middle. Nezuoh seemed willing enough to answer his own questions. "You're probably too tired to think about that. Here." He took the familiar glass bottle from his work desk and handed it to Gojyo. Gojyo shoved his way to the bed, bottle in hand. His belly throbbed and ached, as if to protest:

_"Don't do it. I'll never forgive you."_

He drank deep. It took two mouthfuls to make him feel dizzy, and a third to send him drifting off to sleep. He could still hear that sulking, down-turned lips and creased forehead voice whisper to him: _"I'll never forgive you."_

* * *

"Kenren, no-" Tenpou's voice rang in Gojyo's ears. This was not Ryuji's body, he could tell that already. He recognized the breezeway of Kanzeon Bosatsu's home in Heaven through the tears in his eyes even as he rushed past it. "This is a mistake. You are only going to get yourself in trouble-"

"Lady Kannon!" Kenren's voice roared from his lips as he threw the door open. A mousy blonde man who Kenren didn't recognize swept out of the room in the opposite direction from which Kenren had come, bumping his shoulder and glaring as he passed. Kenren ignored him as he strode into the center of the room and dropped to his hands and knees. "Lady Kannon, I wanted to thank you!"

"Kenren, we can still leave-" Tenpou grabbed Kenren's arms and tried to pull him up. He looked urgently to the goddess on her dais. "Milady, I'm terribly sorry for this intrusion, I'll see him punished, he's just distraught-"

"Thank you for giving me sons," Kenren growled, speaking over Tenpou's protests. "Thank you for letting me fall in love with them. Thank you for two happy years!" He dug his fingers into the mat. "Thank you for stealing them away from me! I almost began to believe my existence mattered to someone other than me, but your damned orders and your damned agreement with them reminded me of just what a real loser I am! Thank you for reminding me of what I deserve!"

"Silence!" Tenpou definitively snapped, planting a foot on Kenren's back and knocking him to the floor. "Do you think you're the only one in pain here?!"

Kenren finally looked up and saw that Kanzeon Bosatsu was hiding her eyes with her hand. His gut squirmed from a sudden pang of guilt. "General Kenren, I know how you feel," she answered somberly. "My heart aches for my little warriors. If I could have ever dreamed this would have happened, I wouldn't have insisted they go. I only wanted them to have a chance to prove themselves. I was wrong. I'm sorry."

"Sh..." Kenren muted his swear and rested his head on the floor again, completely deflated. Tenpou removed his foot and knelt beside him. "I'm... I'm sorry, ma'am, you don't deserve that kind of abuse. I mean, I know you didn't want this to happen."

"You're not the worst I've had today. My cute little nephew has already chewed me out." She smiled weakly. "He called me names one can't repeat in unfamiliar company." She wiped her eyes, though they stayed wet.

"What can I do, milady? I want them back. Can we undo the seal?" Kenren sat upright to meet her eyes. She sighed and shook her head.

"The seal must remain. We cannot dissolve a seal just because two of ours are sealed with it."

"Two of ours are worth a million humans, as far as I care-"

"We should be fortunate you are not a deity, then." Kenren bit his lip at Kanzeon Bosatsu's rebuke. "I can communicate into the seal, and I can bring small things out, but I can only do so much. In the realm they're sealed in, their physical bodies are null, they are almost entirely spirit given form. There's still flesh to them, but I should easily be able to separate some of their souls from their whole. It's possible that I'll be able to bring enough of them out to have them reborn, but they won't survive without their full souls, and until I have a more permanent solution, I'd have to hold their new lives in stasis." She pressed her chin onto her folded hands, and concluded, "All we can do is wait. The day will come when we can throw the seal open, and the boys can return to the plane of the living. That leaves one last difficulty."

"What?" Kenren frowned.

"My nephew- the man who left when you entered- he has demanded I release them to him instead of you."

"Was that Konzen?" Tenpou's brow furrowed. "He looked so angry, I didn't recognize him. I let him watch the boys a few times on days we were away- was he that attached?"

"I told him the exact same thing I've told you. He said something about, 'don't let them back into the army, not with that barbarian. They're too good for that.'" Kanzeon Bosatsu covered a small smile with her palm. Kenren sighed and shook his head.

"As long as I can see them again, I'll be happy. I love those kids, you know."

"I know, and as soon as I find a solution that will satisfy you both, I'll move on it." Kannon rose and descended from her dais, and rested her palms on Kenren's shoulders. Tenpou edged back to keep meeting her eyes, but Kenren found himself staring up at the underside of her bust. "Perhaps you should talk to him. Somehow, I think you two would get along, or at least have some interesting conversations." She smoothed his hair back, and he couldn't keep a stupid smile from his face. "But I can just imagine you're in no mood to make a new friend."

"No'm," he murmured, and lowered his eyes again. "I'm sorry I barged in."

"You were within your rights. Frankly, I'd have been disappointed if you didn't have some harsh words for me. They were your sons, after all." She continued to run her fingers through his hair. "I'll instruct Goujun to give you a few days' leave so you can collect yourself. You will need to give me some time. Live your life as best as you can. As soon as I can make everyone happy with the outcome, you will be the first to know." Kenren bowed his head against her chest.

"Thank you. Thank you. You're too good to a lowly sinner like me..."

* * *

**(Suggested Track: "Cough Syrup," Young the Giant)**

Gojyo opened his eyes to the dark ceiling. It took him a few heart-racing moments to remember he was no longer in his cell, and he was immediately disgusted with himself. His tunic was already stuck to his skin from sweat, his vision was blurry. His whole body felt swollen and full of aches. He wasn't sure how long he had been asleep, but since the patterns of light on the ceiling from the mostly-covered window had only shifted half a meter, he couldn't imagine it had been long. He flailed his arm out and found the bottle just below the edge of the bed. He wasn't sure why he was seeing his dreams through Kenren's eyes, but he didn't have the presence of mind to care. "She lied," he mumbled to himself as he took a quaff from the bottle. "She lied to him. Those comforting words were nothing but shit. She never gave them back to him. She let them torture me instead. That... that merciless bitch..." He took a second sip, then a third. The fourth drink put him under again.

That was how it was for what felt like days to Gojyo, but what he was certain amounted only to a few hours. He would wake, he would drink, and he would collapse back into sleep. Twice, he awoke to see Nezuoh sitting in front of his lantern-lit desk, dedicated to some unimaginable scribbling onto the long rolls of paper. Once, he saw the door was open, and was certain he saw Hakkai leaned against the wall outside. He held his hand out, but Hakkai quickly turned and walked away. He felt even more pitiful than ever, and it took him six mouthfuls that time to return to sleep.

The curtains were open the next time he awoke, and he could see the sun moving up in the afternoon sky. He drank seven times and was asleep again. He woke, and the sun had barely moved. The bottle felt heavier than it had when he'd last picked it up- Nezuoh had probably refilled it. He didn't care. He drank again, and his eyes shut. This time, he didn't even dream before opening his eyes again. Reality crashed into him- nothing had changed. All the pain was still there, but he felt weaker than ever. Any fortitude he'd had was completely gone. And his chief ache was much worse than before.

"Go... g-go away," he mumbled blearily. "I... I hate you." He clenched his fist and pounded it on his aching belly. "Ryuji... what do I do?" He hissed as he felt a new pain, the likes of which he'd not felt for over a year. "Damn... damn... no..." He took a few deep breaths, and it faded away. He assessed the situation slowly- he couldn't think very fast with his mind as fuzzy as it was. "I... need... something... stronger." He pushed himself to his feet. His shifted center of balance staggered him, but he pushed himself forward.

If he had to suffer this agony, he would be numbed. If nothing else, he would hold King Rat to this foul promise.

* * *

**End Notes:** So, now you know why I had to break these chapters up. I had to break up the Trauma Conga Line. Poor, poor Gojyo. I am a terrible person for doing this to him. I swear, I break my own heart sometimes. I need to go listen to Florence and the Machine for like six hours now.

Just to avoid any confusion- yes, Gojyo was seeing one of Kenren's memories. This is for a different reason than why he was seeing Ryuji's- those of you who have seen/read Gaiden probably know why. I'm not going to spoil it here, though. Just let it be said that Gojyo's drugged himself to the point where his own subconscious has broken some barriers, and a voice inside him had a message he needed to hear.

Production notes: On the last chapter; I wrote Ryuji's death scene third. I sometimes find it easier to decide on where I want to go, and then steer my way there. After writing the scene, I looked at it and said, 'I need to establish this, this, and this in order to get here,' and then I can fill in the middle. The beginning and end are easiest for me, but I usually have trouble with middles. Despite that, I usually write the epilogues last, just because I don't like to conclude everything until I've gotten the rest fleshed out. For this chapter, I admit to including "The Tain" as a suggested track mostly for parts 4 and 5 (which is still coming up.) However, the rest of the song fit in nicely with the scenes I used them with (or so I think.) I just couldn't imagine Gojyo's complete breakdown without that dizzying little tune.

By the by, I'm sure most of you don't care about the production notes, but I include them for the benefits of authors reading here who are trying to improve their craft. Maybe it's conceited of me to offer guidance like I'm some maestro, but I feel like sharing what works for me.

That said, next chapter? Oh, it's gonna be good. You are going to enjoy it. We're rapidly approaching the climax of our story, and at the end of the week, you guys are going to get what you've been asking for. Our heroes' reunion is nigh!

Did you enjoy? Review! Did you not enjoy? Review!

Questions? Comments? Confusions? Suggestions? Review!

Anything you'd like to see? Review!

Anything? Review! Nothing? Please review!

Until Friday!


	17. Priest and Rat

**King Rat, No Mercy**

**Author Notes:** Man, the semester's winding down for real this time. I'm so glad I'm so far ahead on the story, I'd hate to deprive you guys of your little slice of masochistic escapism!

Review response time!

RodiSquall- Ooh. You ask some very, very good questions. Unfortunately, at this time, I cannot answer them. Some of your questions will be answered in the upcoming chapters, and when we get to a point where answering your questions will not spoil the story, I promise direct answers. Your patience will be- and as of this chapter, has been- rewarded!

KaKashiisWifey- The "it's not porn" talk is always a fun one, ain't it? As for Sanzo chewing Hakkai out, well, Sanzo has nothing against killing people or youkai, and Hakkai always seems to feel guilty after going on a massacre. He just doesn't want the poor boy to go through the same thing, but it's just a little too late for that. Besides, Sanzo's not the type to pick fights.

D-chan- You get your wish! Without further ado!

**Disclaimer: **The Sanzo party and the original story belongs to Kazuya Minekura. The original scenario and characters are mine.

* * *

**16: Priest and Rat**

Aka and the remainder of the Sanzo party had traveled in almost complete silence from the last village. Their goal was apparent now, and had been since shortly after they'd started moving; a great shadow on the horizon. It soon became clear that they were moving towards a large fortress with a crumbling red roof. However, they were not the only ones. In the shadows of the morning sun, they saw other hanyou making their way there. Aka said nothing by way of explanation, nor did he move towards any of them. Some of them seemed to notice him, but none of them came even close to the party. Their reasoning was obvious- Aka's appearance.

Aka's clothing was completely stained with deep crimson and rust brown blotches, and though Sanzo had cleaned him up as best as he could, he still looked dirty. No, it was more than that; he looked like he felt dirty. He slouched, he carried his spear at his side, and his eyes were blank like a dead man's. Sanzo and Hakkai both seemed to realize that he was no longer pretending anything. He did not speak once from the moment they left the empty village, had nothing else to say to them; he was no longer trying to force any form of camaraderie. Even Goku's feeble attempts at starting a conversation fizzled:

"So, where are we going?" Goku asked. Aka did not respond. "Ne, Aka, what's that building?" Nothing. "Is your brother in there?" Aka shivered, but didn't respond. Goku looked despondently to Sanzo, who shook his head.

"It's not worth your time," he murmured to him.

The morning wore into afternoon, and they found they were on the same path as about thirty others, all of whom were giving them wide berth. Sanzo glanced suspiciously around, and was greeted with the same scrutiny. None made a motion towards them, though. Aka still ignored them, and led them through the door into the great fortress.

**(Suggested Track: "Dragonfly," Shaman's Harvest)**

_Gojyo's head felt like it was full of lead as he stumbled from the upper hallway towards the front of the castle. He felt his insides shifting and shaking, the pounding pulse in his belly half a beat behind his own. His head was sopping wet, with sticky, cold sweat running through his hair and down his cheeks. His feet were swollen, his chest ached. He couldn't think straight, but for the desire for more of the sleeping potion, just to be stupid to the world again. Back into the darkness. He trundled his way to the end of the hall and found himself on a balcony over the dais in the throne room..._

The armored guards stepped aside as Sanzo, Hakkai, and Goku followed Aka into the building. Goku gawked around at the men in their diverse uniforms, some with the clear appearance of generals, a few soldiers. Sanzo and Hakkai only noticed the door shutting behind them.

"This is the man I told you about," Aka muttered.

"Your magician friend?" Hakkai asked with his usual lilt and smile. Aka shook his head. The room cleared, the man at the head visible, with his hair tied back and his red robe, and Aka dropped down to his knees.

"Milord, I found the outsiders. I brought them here." His legs were shaking. "I want my boon. Now."

"Is that so?" Sanzo already hated the man who responded- his opulent robe standing out in the squalor, his sneering voice, his blood-red hair and eyes. "It's odd, reports of your activities only just started reaching me yesterday; in fact, you've just interrupted my scouts' report- I believe your body count is over five hundred now. You kill five hundred of my men and dare ask for a reward?"

"As I thought," Hakkai noted. "You must be King Rat." Goku grabbed onto Sanzo's arm, and Sanzo scowled at the back of Aka's head.

"Astute of you." King Rat smirked, his lips nearly curling up like ribbons. "I assume you've heard nothing kind of me."

"We have not been impressed, no," Hakkai bowed at the waist. "But I will offer you respect as ruler of this dismal place. It takes impressive fortitude to maintain order in the face of such utter failure."

"My, your lovely smile belies a sharp tongue." King Rat chuckled into the back of his hand. "But back to business." He turned to Aka, eyes narrow, smirking lips thin. "I did make the offer- a boon in exchange for live outsiders. What boon do you wish of me?"

"Wait- you're betraying us so he'll give you an instrument?!" Goku squawked urgently, reaching for Aka, but Sanzo yanked him back and swatted him across the forehead.

"A boon, not a bassoon, idiot. He double-crossed us so this King would do him a favor," Sanzo growled into Goku's ear. Aka hung his head low as Goku stumbled towards him.

"Aka... you're giving us to this guy?"

"I'm sorry," Aka mumbled. He shuddered and coughed softly into one hand, then cleared his throat. "I lied to you- the King, and my magician, they're one and the same." He chewed his lower lip. "You... you agreed to help me save my brother. I don't think this is what you intended. I'm sorry I lied to you."

"We figured you out, boy," Sanzo replied icily. He began to cast his eyes around the room...

_Aloft, Gojyo felt eyes land on him. He felt his insides twisting into ever-tighter knots. He was dreaming again, he was all but certainly still dreaming or hallucinating. Sleepwalking. None of this could be real. Goku was dead. Hakkai was gone. And Sanzo... how was this possible? The boy, too. This boy... "Aka." Was that what Goku had called him? "Aka..." He knew that name. Something clicked, and everything was much clearer._

"We deciphered that you would take us here," Hakkai explained. "Sanzo and I realized you probably intended to trade us for your brother." In spite of the dark revelation, he was as brisk and bright as ever. Goku turned away, sniffling and staring at the floor. Aka was shaking from his head to his toes.

"I'm... I'm sorry..."

"Apologies will do you no good. They mean nothing," Sanzo muttered. He had not taken his eyes off what seemed to be a heavy woman in a ragged frock, staring down at them from a balcony. Something seemed off about her. Something was unusual about her thin face and thick body; they were mismatched. Wasn't her jawline a bit too sharp? Her unkempt hair, her filthy frame, there was something distinctly sick about her. Sanzo couldn't look away, though he kept talking to Aka. "Remember, we let you do this."

"Wh-what?" Aka was appalled.

"We could have turned and abandoned you at any time, but we chose to follow you here." Hakkai seemed to have picked up on the point of Sanzo's focus as he perused the room as well. "King Rat... that phrase intrigues me. It's a term we've heard used before. You may know this from your reports, Lord," he looked back to King Rat, who wrinkled his nose but did not interrupt. "But we had a fourth companion in our party before we met Aka. Oddly enough, he once used your title to describe himself. I wonder if perhaps you know him."

_Aka. The baby brother. The red-haired one. Gojyo wondered how he could have forgotten, how he could have escaped his mind. His Eiji. Ryuji had loved him so much it hurt... it hurt... it hurt... Wait._

Aka doubled over and coughed hard into his cupped hands. His face was pale, he shivered despite the humidity. He smeared his hand on his pants, wiping fresh blood onto his pocket. Goku flinched, but looked away and bit on his fist.

"Your fourth?" King Rat turned his eyes upwards and to the left as he thought. "Oh, your hanyou friend. He has joined me of his own free will, and is now an indispensable part of my force. You can join him, if it's true you possess a source of Heavenly power." King Rat's eyes glinted as he gloated, and Sanzo's upper lip curled as he looked back to King Rat. Aka began to cough again. Hakkai looked at Sanzo, and the two met eyes for a moment.

"We do." Hakkai turned back towards the King, smirking. "But I think we'd rather eat it than give it to you."

"Sir!" Aka interrupted as he caught his breath. "You said you'd give me whatever I wanted if I brought them to you- you never said anything about them cooperating. I want my brother. Please give me my big brother back!" He pressed his forehead to the floor, disgust written on his every feature.

_No, Gojyo thought, no. I've killed Ryuji, he's going to make me kill Aka too. I can't do that, I can't let that happen. I can't kill both of my sons!_

"Your brother? Yes, I see." He nodded to some of his guards as he got to his feet. "Hold the outsiders here. Come with me, boy." King Rat's vicious smirk was unnerving, but Sanzo and Hakkai were still focused on the woman on the balcony.

"My, most unusual. Your lovely queen looks ready to tear my throat out." Goku and Aka looked up to see what they had spotted. Hakkai's smile faded. "And yet, all others here are soldiers. What use does an army have for women in her condition?"

"Hanyou are sterile," Sanzo muttered. "How did she get into that condition?"

"Dude," Goku gasped, as it clicked. "That's not a lady."

Gojyo vaulted the railing, jumped from the balcony and landed a meter in front of Aka. His knees shook from the impact, but he straightened himself up quickly and seized the boy's shoulders. "Run," he growled huskily, then louder, "Run! Don't you hear me, run away!"

Aka was in shock. "You- you're-"

"He'll kill you. He'll make me kill you," Gojyo snarled. "He sent these illusions to find you and trick you into coming here, so he could kill you! Look at me! He's already killed Ryuji!" He pulled his hand back to his middle. "He reduced him to nothing and put him inside me, so he could control him, and he'll do the same to you!" Aka yelled and scrambled back, and another cough seized his throat. Sanzo, Hakkai, and Goku were in shock- Gojyo was alive, very pregnant, and possibly insane, and none of them could put the pieces together quick enough. King Rat's gallery was stunned as well, but the King himself was trying to choke laughter back into his palm. Gojyo, however, blocked all of them out as he backed Aka into a wall.

"My brother," Aka squeaked, stumbling backwards.

"He's dead. Ryuji is dead. Yohei is dead! I saw his husk of a corpse. Run, Aka, run! Leave this place!" Gojyo put his face close to Aka's, and whispered, "I would have loved you if I'd had the chance. I love you more than words can say, Eiji. I would have been a doting dad who spoiled you rotten as much as he could, but now, you have to get away from me. Somewhere death can't find you. I just want you to live." He released Aka, who was wide-eyed with shock. Gojyo ground his teeth together, and shouted: "Go!" Aka pulled back from Gojyo with terror etched into his expression, then broke into a run. He bounced off the wall, onto the shoulders of one of the generals, then leaped through a window. Gojyo sighed with relief, then turned around to face his friends. Hakkai was the first to find words.

"Gojyo, what the hell has he done to you?" There was not even a trace of a smile left in Hakkai's thoughts.

"Shut up. Like you don't know!" Gojyo trembled as he glowered at Hakkai. His glare turned to Goku. "And you won't work on me- I saw your corpse too!" Finally, he focused on Sanzo. "And you..." He whirled around to King Rat. "You said you'd never manipulate his appearance again! Why are you using your damned illusions on me again!? You said you wouldn't! You said you'd stop!"

"Did I?" King Rat smirked. "Did I, really?"

"You fucking rat, I'll-" he froze, realizing all eyes were still on him, critical gazes bearing down on him like a brick wall on his chest. He turned back to the "illusions" again, and balled his fists tighter. "Stop." He backed away from them. "Stop staring at me. Go away. Please stop!" He whirled on his heel and ran for the door to the back hallways. Hakkai tore after him at a speed one wouldn't think anyone with a human body was capable of, with Sanzo and Goku in close pursuit.

"Let nobody leave or enter," Nezuoh ordered the soldiers in his gallery. "I'll deal with this myself." He pulled a few pieces of paper from the folds of his robe, slapped them onto the door frame, where they stuck and began to emit a strange light, and began to dig for more as he slowly, methodically pursued the Sanzo pilgrims into his catacombs.

* * *

Gojyo had vanished into the darkness by the time the trio had gotten the door open and shut again, but they rushed after him. Hakkai stopped when he spotted a stairwell. "There are levels above and below. Let's split three ways and search. Goku, go up, Sanzo, go down." Hakkai pushed his monocle up his nose, a determined look in his eyes. "I'll take this level. No time to waste!" He dashed down the hallway. Goku panicked and tried to follow him, but hit an unseen wall.

"Ow, dammit!" Goku swore angrily. "It's trapped him in!"

"Or it's keeping us from following. That King must be doing something," Sanzo muttered. "Let's just find him, and then we'll worry about the rest."

"Right. Nobody can stop the four of us together!" Goku whooped aloud, and ran up the stairs. Sanzo descended slowly, listening for any sounds behind him. He had an ill premonition nagging at his earlobes, but pushed it aside. He didn't have a choice but to push forward.

Goku took the stairs two at a time and leaped down the hallway in bounds, ears keen to any sound that was not his own. He heard some sort of commotion from the direction of the assembly hall, and almost moved towards it to see what was happening, but turned when he heard a voice behind him. He turned, and saw a door slam shut. He grinned. "Found you!" He grabbed the door handle and jiggled it. It was locked, but Goku had no intention of letting that stop him. He backed up and rammed the door with his shoulder, knocking it down. He stumbled into a bedroom with darkened windows, and spotted a figure crouched in the corner, curled up tight. Goku rushed to Gojyo's side.

"Hey, let's leave!" He shook Gojyo's shoulder. "We're gonna get outta here."

"Go away! You're just an illusion! I know you ain't really there!" Gojyo mumbled into his palms. He covered his eyes and mouth with his hands, rubbing the tears away. "Leave me alone! I'm sick of being tricked!"

"B-but, Gojyo," Goku whimpered, and got down on his knees beside him. "We're friends, and I'm telling you, I'm not dead. We wouldn't abandon you here." He stopped in place when he realized something. "Hey. Gojyo." He shook Gojyo's shoulder again. "I need you to tell me something."

"Stop touching me!" Gojyo screeched, and launched himself at Goku. Goku artfully planted his hand in the middle of Gojyo's face and held him back.

"I remembered something," Goku said quietly. Gojyo's eyes flared bright for a moment, but though Goku felt the aura radiating off of him, he brushed it off like a cool breeze. He wound his other hand back and socked Gojyo in the eye. Gojyo screamed like an animal as his face tore away into shreds, revealing only a void within. Goku clenched his fists. "You can't trick me. You're not real."

"Why are you hitting me now?! I'm your friend!" "Gojyo" snarled, and rushed at Goku again, his face still splitting off and falling away.

"No, you're not!" Goku retorted fiercely, and he sidestepped "Gojyo's" rush and pinned his lumbering body against the wall. "Gojyo" struggled, but he couldn't match Goku's raw strength. "Gojyo's face wouldn't do that! Besides that, you just don't seem like Gojyo. He might be stupid enough to be fooled by your tricks, but I'm not!" He put his fist the rest of the way through "Gojyo's" head, and the illusion shattered completely and fell to shreds of paper on the ground. Goku could see scribbled writing on it, but couldn't make heads or tails of it.

"It's like Aka said. He warned us," Goku murmured to himself. "I better go warn the others!"

* * *

Hakkai dashed past darkened doors to barracks and two meeting rooms, looking in each one briefly but seeing nothing. He finally spotted a familiar shadow ducking into a room at the end of the hall, and followed. He chased Gojyo in, and didn't flinch when the door shut behind him. Gojyo was tearing at his hair and shaking.

"Why, Hakkai?" He whispered, and turned his angry gaze towards him. "Why would you do this to me?"

"I have done nothing to you. I'm your friend," Hakkai insisted calmly, and slowly advanced on him. He could see the madness behind Gojyo's feverish eyes, but something seemed wrong about the rest of him. Something was missing.

"You abandoned me. Were you even looking for me?" Gojyo yanked the tendrils of his bangs, chewing his lower lip. "Then, you finally show up, and you tell me you've turned your back on me!" Tears flowed freely down his face.

"No, he tricked you. Don't you know he can use illusions?" Hakkai reached towards him, approaching slowly. "He lied to you. Your head's just not on right, he's got you confused. You know I would never turn my back on you-"

"Liar!" Gojyo wailed, trying to press himself into the wall. "Of course you would, I ain't worth that much! You've hurt me enough already. You tortured me when I was at my worst."

"You mean you're still upset about-" Hakkai grimaced as he remembered denying Gojyo a certain pain reliever more than a year earlier. "I had to get the truth out of you somehow. I'm sorry about that, Gojyo, but please, listen to me. We need to leave. He's done something to you, and I have to fix it. I'm your friend, I will not abandon you." He opened his hands. "I love you like a brother, and I'd never betray you."

"H-Hakkai..." Gojyo could move no further back against the wall. Hakkai was only a meter away. He kept his face straight as he finally got a good look at Gojyo, how filthy he was, the grime that coated him. Hakkai realized something, and embraced Gojyo around the small of his back. Gojyo froze, anxious, but slowly wrapped his left arm around Hakkai's shoulder.

"I'm sorry it had to be this way," Hakkai murmured. "I've searched for you for five days, and yet when I find you..." He grabbed Gojyo's wrist and pulled it from behind him, shoving Gojyo himself to the ground and swiped a dagger from his hand. "You're nothing but an illusion yourself." He glared at "Gojyo," who instead smirked. "Gojyo" swiped at his face, but Hakkai shoved himself back and jumped up.

"You're sharper than you look." "Gojyo" stumbled to his feet, his unwieldy body less than cooperative.

"You don't smell right," Hakkai replied, and he and "Gojyo" began to slowly circle each other.

"What kind of animal are you that you know me by smell? Don't tell me you've laid this body down as well."

"Oh, I'm a youkai. Ignore this appearance, I'm truly a beast. You had probably figured that out, though." Hakkai brushed his hair back behind his ears, his fingers grazing the limiter on his ear. "But no, my sense of smell is not that strong, not at the moment. I smelled the reek off of him in the foyer- he smells of sickness. Though you look befouled, you smell of nothing. And even if he weren't so filthy, he'd have some odor. And I know his odor." Hakkai smirked. "Though not as well as my companions might. One really is an animal, and the other knows him from the inside better than the outside. Bottom line is, you have no smell of your own, and that is your fatal flaw. Meanwhile, you don't seem to realize the disadvantage you have."

"And what's that?" "Gojyo" had a weird glint in his eyes, and Hakkai staggered back when he felt King Rat's monstrous aura emanating from him. Still, Hakkai straightened himself up and pushed through it towards "Gojyo."

"You've chosen a form that moves poorly!" Hakkai kicked the imitation in the gut and twisted around to kick his back as he fell. "Gojyo" tried to dodge back into the wall, but Hakkai pinned him and pushed his fingers into his face, resting his fingers above his eyes and below his lip. "Gojyo" tried to wrench himself free, but Hakkai grabbed his other shoulder and pushed him against the wall. "A lumbering corpse and a small room? Your master's need to warp my emotions must have outweighed his desire to kill me." Hakkai shoved his hand through "Gojyo's" head entirely, but it collapsed under the force. "Gojyo" himself dissolved, and a thin slip of paper fluttered to the ground. Hakkai's upper lip curled.

"Shikigami. For some reason, I don't care for shikigami." He cracked his knuckles and turned back towards the hallway. "I like this rat less by the second, and that may be the understatement of the millennium."

* * *

**(Suggested Track: "Satisfied," Aranda)**

Sanzo spotted a flash of red in the darkness, and rushed forward to follow it. The figure before him seemed to realize he was being followed, and picked up speed, but his body was encumbered and Sanzo caught up. He grabbed onto Gojyo's shoulders, holding him in place. "Come on, we have to get out of here. Come on," Sanzo growled, tugging him forward. Gojyo whirled around and threw Sanzo's arms off, but he didn't move, didn't run, instead just tried to catch his breath. Sanzo edged back, unnerved as he got a look at Gojyo's face- his eyes and cheeks were red and swollen, his grimy cheeks streaked with tears. He smelled as putrescent as he looked- the smell of rotten ginger and old sweat reeked off of him. He was shaking as he tried to keep himself upright. His visage was as dark as the shadowy, cold corridor that seemed to extend for kilometers behind him, but Gojyo's eyes were lit with black fire. Sanzo gritted his teeth and grabbed onto Gojyo's wrist with both hands. "Idiot cockroach, we have to leave!"

"I don't want to go anywhere with you. I'm tired of you," Gojyo breathed, his tone akin to a snake's rattle.

"What are you talking about?" Sanzo advanced on him, but Gojyo dodged deftly back.

"Don't touch me! Don't look at me! Damn your eyes and hands and tongue!" Gojyo snarled, and he tightened his fists at his sides, either too afraid or too insane to think of raising them. "Haven't you done enough to me?! I'm sick of looking at you, I don't want to hear your voice!" He shuddered, chewed his lower lip, and clutched his head with both hands. "I don't want you here..."

"I don't even know what you're talking about," Sanzo said, keeping his cool as much as he could. "We have to leave. I don't-"

"No! No! Stop it! You're lying to me!" Gojyo yanked his hair again. "You can't play with me like this- I'm not a fucking rag doll! Didn't I say you could use this body already?! Didn't I say I'd let you use me the way you want to?! You promised me you'd numb me! You promised no more illusions!"

"I'm the genuine article, you fool, I'm real!" Sanzo barked, as he felt his own anger start to sear his tongue. He remembered that Aka had mentioned that King Rat had used illusions to torment him, and realized with a chill that such a thing might have been done to Gojyo. Even more, this Gojyo, even the Gojyo he'd seen in the entrance hall, may have been one of them. He pushed the thought from his mind- wouldn't a fake have attacked him by now? "What has he done to you?"

"You know exactly what you did to me! Fuck off! I hate you!" Gojyo shook his head. "No, no, I feel the same way you do about me." He glared straight into Sanzo's eyes. "I nothing you. I feel nothing for you. And you know what? It's easier that way." He folded his arms tight, as though trying to embrace himself for warmth. "That's what you told me, isn't it? I mean nothing to you. I am nothing to anybody. I'm not worth a damn to anyone or anything. I don't deserve anything more than air and silence, and you ain't willing to give me either." Tears flowed from him faster than his short breaths. Sanzo was mute with shock, only able to listen, as Gojyo's voice rose in a maddening crescendo: "You told me, must have been a dozen times, you were telling the truth, and you're surprised that I believed you? No, I've known this whole time you were right!" Gojyo swung wildly at Sanzo, but Sanzo had presence of mind enough to dodge to the side, though he could not bring himself to move away.

"I know... I know!" Gojyo shrieked, trying to catch his breath. "I'm not worthy of your love! Anybody's love. I'm..." He grabbed onto his hair again. "I'm lower than even Ryuji. The Goddess tried to give him love, and I killed him. He's dead, and it's your fault!" Sanzo was still silent, stiffer than a gravestone as Gojyo broke down hard, slouching and weeping angrily. "No, no, it's my fault. Everything's always my fault, right? Swear it at me in whatever evil voices you have. I have never meant anything to you or anybody. I never will. I'm dirt under your feet, unworthy to touch your shoe. I surrendered, didn't I? I confessed all my sins." He glared back up at Sanzo. "Are you happy yet? Are you ever just going to be fucking happy?"

"You think I'm someone else," Sanzo finally managed to respond, as calm as could be. "You are sorely mistaken."

"I don't care!" Gojyo screamed. His voice broke like a child's, his breath ragged. His back arched like a cat's, his every hair standing on end. "I don't care what you call yourself! King or priest, you're nothing but a rat!" He sobbed again, his posture weakening further. "You made me a promise. Why... why can't you keep it?"

Sanzo felt his heart snap as though it had been stepped on. He opened his mouth to try and speak, but heard another voice instead.

"You're a good listener, eh?" It was a voice not unlike his own, yet it was not his. He could almost feel the layer of slime on the words. He saw himself approaching Gojyo from behind, as if he were staring into a mirror, but donning the nastiest smirk his face could warp into. "And yet, you don't know when to stop talking." Gojyo was pale at the sound of this voice- or had he been that pale all along? The smell reeking off of him was starting to get more and more distinct, too. He knew there was only one thing that bitter.

With the other Sanzo looking on, he stepped back towards Gojyo, one hand out. Gojyo flinched, but froze when Sanzo laid the back of his hand on his forehead, and touched his other hand to his own.

"You're sick. You're running a fever. Not to mention whatever poison he must have been feeding you has clearly addled your senses."

"Sh-shut up," Gojyo growled as he pushed Sanzo's hand away again. "Don't... don't act so coy!"

"It's about time you left," the other Sanzo snarled, and he moved towards Sanzo. His aura was crashing against Sanzo like a tidal wave, but Sanzo stood strong- he had found a new resolve. Sanzo shoved the other him back, and looked Gojyo straight in the eyes.

"No, you're sick, and we need to leave." Purple made violent static with red, and even the false Sanzo was thrown off by the electricity between the two. "If you wish to blame me, then fine, I'll take responsibility. I'll tend you myself if I must. What was that saying..."

"Oh, I know," Hakkai chimed in from behind the other Sanzo. The other one yelped, and Gojyo turned to see Hakkai holding the fake Sanzo off the ground by his neck. "Feed a fever, choke a cold?" His eyes shone with mischief, and Gojyo's heart suddenly felt like a helium balloon. "Either way, I think we've a cure for what ails you."

* * *

**End Notes:** Since when was Hakkai a badass? Oh, I know. Forever. I don't like to brag, but I love that little one-two-liner at the end. And I admit, I cried a little when I was writing the "Satisfied" scene.

So, we're back to our normal update schedule, and chapter 17 will be up next Friday. However, after that, I have finals to do, so we'll have another omake. Hope nobody minds!

Did you enjoy the chapter? Did you hate it? Review!  
Questions? Comments? Suggestions? Anything you need from me? Review!  
Anything? Review! Nothing? Review anyway!

Until then!


	18. Escape

**King Rat, No Mercy**

**Author Notes:** This chapter's gonna be a good one! Justice is gonna be served!

Review responses!

D-chan: D'aww, flattery will get you nowhere... ah, who am I kidding. Thanks for the love! I hope this chapter keeps you happy!

Dragon77: Everyone loves badass Hakkai. There is nothing not awesome about him.

RodiSquall: I don't mind the nitpicking. I know I need to be more careful- I want to be a professional, after all!- but I keep slipping. I know it's little things here and there, mostly just switching words around while I'm editing or something, but correcting me helps me improve and pay more attention. As for the fate awaiting our villain, well, I hope you like what I have in store.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything except Aka, Ryuji, Nezuoh, and the sequence of words.

* * *

**17: Escape**

"Is this the rat that's been creeping through your nightmares?" Gojyo was shaking all over as Hakkai dangled the imitation Sanzo in the air, who struggled and flailed uselessly. His eyes shot between the two Sanzos before him, and his head spun.

"I don't know. I don't know. I don't know," he muttered, grabbing his head in his hands.

"That's evidence enough for me." Sanzo drew his pistol.

"He's not worth the bullet or our time." Hakkai bashed the false Sanzo's head against the wall and dropped him into a heap on the floor. A small piece of paper fluttered down from his bruised forehead, and King Rat lay unconscious. "Shikigami and some advanced talismans. A bit of paper can be a dangerous thing." He turned towards Gojyo and Sanzo, his usual smile slipping back on like a favorite shoe. "Let's go find Goku."

"Y-you mean you're not working for him?" Gojyo stammered. "You were a double agent or something?" Hakkai's smile faltered for a second.

"Did you really think I would do that? What do you take me for?" Hakkai opened his arms and reached out to Gojyo. "I would never work on any team but ours."

Gojyo stepped back. "Are you just another decoy? I swear to god, man, I'm through with this shit, I can't take it any more-"

"He has you fooled," Aka muttered quietly from behind Sanzo and Gojyo. They hadn't heard his approach, but Sanzo and Gojyo turned as he emerged from the dark hallway into the light of the nearby torch. "It's okay. He had me fooled too. Sometimes, I still forget it was him and not my brother that did those horrible things to me." Aka's eyes were dull, his spear slung over his shoulder, dripping red onto his tunic and pack. He looked small and thin, and coughed weakly into his hand. Hakkai stiffened, hostile, and Sanzo felt Gojyo scramble past him.

"I thought I told you to leave!" Gojyo shrieked, and stumbled towards him. "Run! Go!" He swung at Aka, and Aka took the hit to his face and staggered back. He rubbed his cheek, but kept talking.

"How long were you here before Ryuji died? How long did he spend with you before he completely collapsed?" Gojyo fell mute at this question, and Aka wiped his cheek off and hung his head. "Took a few days, right? I can be near you for a few days, and that's even if the Callback to Spirits is still at full effect. I was told it takes five days, less on a weakened spirit. You've only been here five days, and that bastard had ten months to wear Ryuji down. I may be weakened by your presence, but I've got five days before I'm at any risk."

"Four. It took four," Gojyo babbled under his breath, and he began to yank on his hair again. "He died after four days, it's all my fault, no, Ryuji, no, Ryuji, no, Ryuji, no..."

"What, exactly, is the Callback to Spirits?" Hakkai demanded over Gojyo's muttering. Aka didn't even resist a reply.

"It's a spell he developed. He told me that it could be used to call a kindred spirit into a living body in order to reform their body around their soul. Dead would be drawn in instantaneously, but a live spirit would take a few days. A few painful days." Aka could not bring himself to look any of them in the face, slouched and stiff. "He intended to rebirth all of his soldiers using it, but he said he had a plan to test it out first. He just needed the right person to use it on."

Hakkai and Sanzo both glanced at Gojyo, who still rambled under his breath and tugged his hair, then back at Aka. Sanzo could almost feel Hakkai losing his patience. "How-"

"He must have somehow known you were coming so that he could use you, seeing as you've had children before. He said he'd added a clause to make it work especially on someone compatible with Ryuji." His knuckles turned white gripping his spear, accusing eyes turning to a still mumbling Gojyo. He spoke a bit louder to break through the haze clouding Gojyo's thoughts. "It seems you and Ryuji were compatible enough for his tastes." Gojyo fell silent. "He would have calibrated the spell after this little test run and probably a few more, acquire a few more able subjects until his selected bodies were turning out fully-fledged soldiers as newborn men. Like dairy cows forced to birth calf after calf so she'll give more milk... or for veal." His narrow eyes were no more than slits as he glowered at Gojyo. "But surely you would have been his very favorite."

"You mean you knew about all this?!" Hakkai snarled, his right eyelid twitching, his cheeks flushed. Sanzo was not sure he'd ever seen him this incensed. "Why didn't you tell us?!"

"I knew he intended to use it on Ryuji, but only so long as I refused to work for him." Aka was completely unfazed by Hakkai's reprimand. "I thought I could save him by bringing him the outsiders he wanted. I said I'd try and do what he wanted, but he must have run out of patience." He lowered his eyes. "And how could I possibly know he already had your friend? He lied to me the entire time, intending to use Ryuji as his live test subject the moment he fell into his hands. But for whatever reason, I believed him; he had me fooled. And for that, I'm sorry."

"You don't sound sorry," Hakkai growled under his breath and reached for his limiter. Gojyo stepped in front of Aka, arms spread wide.

"Don't, please," he whispered. "Not him too." Hakkai halted when he saw the complete dejection apparent in Gojyo's entire form.

"For your sake, fine," he hissed, still glowering at Aka. "Why did you come back for us, boy?"

"For _your_ sake," Aka replied. "I can get you out. I can leave, and I'll take Ryuji with me within you."

"You could have left this whole time?!" Goku squeaked as he jogged up from behind Aka. Aka shuddered as he recognized his voice. "Why didn't you?"

"Same reason nobody else could- I don't have a source of holy power. But you do." Aka focused on Sanzo. "I'm the one who set the seal. I know how to undo it. I realize you can't trust me, but I promise- I won't take your sutra, I just need to touch it."

"First, tell me who you killed," Sanzo requested calmly. Gojyo shivered- the utter placidity of his voice made him anxious, but Aka was emotionless.

"All the cocksuckers in the gallery. I would never have made it back down here if I hadn't."

"What would your brother say?" Gojyo muttered, focusing on Aka. Aka shook his head side to side.

"He'd never forgive me." He looked back up. "But I needed to do it."

"Ne, Aka, where's your big brother?" Goku prodded Aka's back. Aka pointed at Gojyo, and Goku grinned. "Wow, I didn't know you had a brother! You guys even look alike!"

"It is you!" Gojyo gasped, and he threw his arms around Goku. "You are real! Only the real one could be that stupid!"

"Hey!" Goku squirmed, but Gojyo held tight.

"You're alive! Thank the goddess you're alive!"

"Wh-what?" Goku looked bewildered as Gojyo rested his chin on Goku's head. "Hey, where did your tummy come from? I thought I wasn't getting another little cousin!"

"My big brother is inside him. The bastard king intended to corrupt him by fusing some of his own spirit into his and letting him be born again." Aka clenched his fists. "And I'm sorry I couldn't get here faster. Ryuji might still be alive." He clenched his fists and growled, "Your friend here might not be a total waste. But I'm sorry. He has his head screwed on wrong- my brother in his belly- but there's nothing more we can do for him. We need to get out of here to save the rest of you." All five turned when they heard a soft groan from behind them, and Aka went for his spear again. "That monster's not dead!" Hakkai stopped him and pinned his wrist to the wall.

"Haven't you killed enough? How many corpses will the goddess forgive?!" Hakkai's voice was firm. He intimated in a much gentler tone, "You're angry, I know. You want to tear him to pieces."

"I want to take from him everything he's taken from me!" Aka snarled wildly, and Goku flinched. Gojyo hugged him tighter.

"And that would take a very long time, would it not? I myself would be happy to tear his spinal cord out through his skull, but we don't have the time to give him what he deserves. Think, Aka: what would happen to your brother were his spirit reborn here?" Hakkai nodded towards Gojyo, still gripping the hilt of the spear. It was Aka's turn to flinch. "Are you with me now? Let him rot here, we can deal with him later if we must." Hakkai finally snatched Aka's spear from his hands. "Part of carrying a dangerous tool is knowing how and when to use it. They should never have given you a pointed weapon." Aka grunted and pulled away from Hakkai.

"Let's at least move before he wakes up!" His eyes were stone as he shoved past him, taking his spear up again, and began to lead the party away. Hakkai followed closely. Sanzo managed to pull Gojyo off of Goku and took hold of the sleeve on his awful tunic, and he dragged him in their lopsided formation. Gojyo was mute with shock as they made their way to the stairwell and began to scale the stairs. Sanzo, however, seemed to have picked up on his line of thinking.

"Tell me what visions he showed you."

"What's that?" Goku frowned.

"He can change his appearance, and make doppelgangers. I saw him become my double- my face, voice, and even my clothes- and I doubt this is the first time."

"He probably used some sort of talismans to imitate the rest of us to him as well," Hakkai mused, and Gojyo's head spun. He froze in place on the middle landing, and Sanzo stopped beside him. Hakkai and Goku paused, as Sanzo shook Gojyo's shoulder.

"Keep moving. Come on."

"Goku was dead," he mumbled vacantly. "I saw his corpse and smelled his blood. Hakkai, you hated me and blamed me, you were an agent of the King." He pushed Sanzo's hand off of him and trundled forward, closer to Aka.

"That million-meter stare," Hakkai whispered to himself, before looking to Sanzo. "And who can imagine what he did with your face?"

"I doubt any of it was positive," Sanzo muttered.

"But how did he know to use our faces?" Goku wondered. "I know I never saw this King guy before today. How would he know what we look like?"

"He can see into a person's soul," Aka replied from the head of the party as he pushed the catacomb doors open. The gallery was lined with bodies, but none of the party was shocked. Whoever Aka hadn't killed had surely fled, as the front door was left wide open. "The King never gave me details when he was briefing me, but he mentioned that he awoke to the power down here and tapped into it. He used to use talismans to read into the souls of those around him, increasing his own aural powers. He grew in strength, used it to control his men, and eventually got so strong with it, he didn't need the talismans anymore."

"His own knowledge of pain and hurt told him where to look for what to use on you. And the worst part is, the longer he's around you, the better his illusion gets. He probably only got a very shallow read on the three of you, and was only able to puppet some of your shallow fears and anxieties, and used your friend's memories of you that he's had the time to glean." He stopped at the door, letting the others catch up with him. Gojyo was moving heavily and holding his middle as he walked, seeming to ignore Aka. Aka stared blankly across the empty expanse of dead, dry land. "But he reads more of you, delves deeper and deeper. And he learns what works and what doesn't. He even uses smells. After a few days, he left a bowl of apples in the room when he was interrogating me, and I kept smelling them. Ryuji... he loves apples." He stopped ten meters in front of the castle gates. "And so I had to listen to my brother's voice, watch his face, smell his scent, as the bastard used him for a puppet and told me everything was my fault. And after three days, I believed."

"He's a monster," Gojyo muttered, and he stopped as the others caught up. "It hurts." He folded his hands around his middle. "It... it hurts!" He sank down to his knees, hissing in pain. "Please, wait, please, not here, not now!"

"Stay calm," Hakkai ordered him, and he whirled on Aka as Gojyo began to groan and hiss. "How do we leave?"

"Hang on." Aka tossed a panicked look towards Gojyo, but got down on his hands and knees and began to push away the dirt and dust. He found the corner of the black slab, and Goku and Sanzo quickly got down to help him. Hakkai crouched down beside Gojyo and started rubbing his back.

"Breathe deeply. How long have you been in pain?"

"On... on and off... can't remember..." Gojyo panted. "Getting worse..."

"Lord Sanzo, I need your sutra," Aka requested quietly as they uncovered the black slab. "Please." Aka wiped his hands on his pants and held them out to Sanzo. Sanzo narrowed his eyes, and offered Aka the end of his sutra. "A direct channel to Heaven," he murmured in awe, admiration. He closed his eyes and began to try hard to call up some old memory. Gojyo bellowed in pain.

"No! No, Ryuji, no, Ryuji, no, Ryuji, no," Gojyo growled to himself, and he hit himself in the stomach a few times. Hakkai tried to stay his arms, but he struggled against his touch. "No, Ryuji, no, Yohei, no Ryuji-"

"Yohei?" Hakkai's eyes widened. Aka lowered his eyes and began to chant quietly:

"O, Merciful Goddess..."

"Yohei..." Gojyo panted. "Ryuji... they were one and the same." He grunted as he braced himself against his legs. His eyes shot to Sanzo, focusing on him with an unsteady glare. Sanzo didn't react; his lips were already drawn, his eyes already wide. "So are Aka and Eiji. Same soul, different face." He groaned and doubled over again. "Ryuji, I've had you before, I can't do it again!"

"But you will." Gojyo knew that sneering voice well, though it was ragged and raspy. King Rat stood at the doors of his fortress, his forehead bruised, madness apparent in his face. "We had an agreement, and you will fulfill it!"

"My, my." Hakkai got to his feet. "Gojyo, you do make the strangest alliances. And yet, I think this one has run its course." Gojyo, on his hands and knees, stared at the ground in shock until the pain suddenly ebbed away.

**(Suggested Track: "The Tain, Pt. 5," by The Decemberists. Pt 5: 14:09-18:35. Ignore scene breaks, song runs through the end of the chapter.)**

"You know?" Gojyo found his breath- had Ryuji heard him? Where had this determination come from? "I think you're right." He pushed himself to a stand, his womb sloshing and swaying as he found his footing. Goku stood in front of Aka and Sanzo, as Aka mumbled his way through the prayer. "Hey, rat bastard. You broke your word. You said I'd feel nothing. You lied."

"I'm a rat, what do you expect?" Nezuoh snarled. Gojyo strode past Hakkai towards him. Hakkai grabbed his wrist, but Gojyo jerked his hand away. He gave Hakkai a plaintive look, tacitly insisting, 'Let me have this.'

"What do I expect? A little common fucking courtesy. I'm a rat too, you know." He advanced on King Rat, who moved to meet him. "But you didn't treat me like one of yours. You treated me like shit under your shoe. You abused my children, you took advantage of all three of us, and you still expect even little respect out of me?"

"I am King, and you are my subject!" Nezuoh roared, his aura flaring. Gojyo stood strong against it, almost feeling another force holding him up. "And still, I offer you what you want most! Isn't that courtesy enough?!" His face shifted, and suddenly, he was Sanzo again. "I will be the man he never could be, the Sanzo you really want, the one you deserve. I'd make your every desire come true. Give me a chance, and you'll learn to love me-"

Gojyo pulled his elbow back and socked him in the eye. "I don't want anything you have to give!" He roared, and dove onto Nezuoh with all his force and began pummeling him. Nezuoh struggled under him, but Gojyo's fury was unstoppable. Gojyo kept pounding on his face and neck, screaming, "I don't want anything you have to give me! I already have a Sanzo, and that's all I need!"

"Answer my call!" Aka shouted. The black light shone from the slab again, and darkness spread under them. Gojyo saw the dark light, and glanced back towards them. Aka smiled his thin, sarcastic smile, adding, "Red is green."

"You'll stay with me!" Nezuoh tossed an open bottle towards Gojyo, and the odorous potion splashed his face. The bottle itself crashed to the ground and shattered. Gojyo, however, wiped the potion off.

"It doesn't work, not on me. I guess using it as much as you've used it on me made me immune to its effects." He smirked and rose to his feet, suddenly feeling victorious. "Without your guards holding me, and your poison, and your paper, you really do have nothing on me. You're nothing but a lowly pest." Nezuoh screeched impotently, as Gojyo rejoined his friends. He still couldn't look them in the eyes, but still held out his hand. "Let's all hold tight this time, right?" Goku grabbed Sanzo's arm, Hakkai took hold of Gojyo by the elbow, and Sanzo reached to take Gojyo's hand. Aka stared, wide-eyed, down. The void opened, and they felt the wind open its blustering maw and take them whole.

Gojyo didn't, couldn't, react when the pain rushed back in waves. They all rose together, headfirst, the dusty sunset sky rushing past them. Hakkai held his shoulder tight, Goku clung onto Sanzo and looped himself into Sanzo's belt, and Sanzo clutched tight to Gojyo's chest. He couldn't ignore Sanzo's breath in his ear, the somber whisper, "I won't let go. Don't let go. I'll never let you go." He couldn't respond, couldn't comprehend the dissonance of the Sanzo he knew and the Sanzo holding his hand. He saw Aka falling beside them, arms at his sides, hair wild in the wind.

"Hey, kid!" Gojyo reached his free hand out, opening himself to embrace. Aka gaped in shock, and Gojyo could clearly read his lips:

"General?" Aka reached and grabbed his hand tight, but at the same time, Gojyo felt another hand on his shoulder. He looked above him, and he was sure he saw Ryuji there. He grinned at him, and pushed off of him to ascend ever upwards, vanishing from sight.

Shadows materialized beside them, as the rest of the realm inverted. The paltry remains of King Rat's army was falling beside them. Sanzo, however, noticed that not all of them were falling. He heard their screams and cries echo around him, and watched one near them crumble away to bones and dust.

"Time is catching up with them," he realized to himself, and immediately turned his gaze to Aka. Aka looked lightheaded, his body limp, but he still slowly blinked his eyes open and shut.

One figure rose beside them, though- Hakkai saw King Rat's bruised and broken face, but could not hear whatever foul words he was spewing at them. He disappeared as quickly as Hakkai had spotted him, and Hakkai caught a glimpse of his wild hair and red robe vanishing into the dust below. He was almost sure he'd imagined seeing someone pushing him down, but he would never be certain.

_Nezuoh did not know when he'd been grabbed, but he was in awe of the buxom woman pushing him downwards. "You... you are Kanzeon Bosatsu!" He wasn't sure how he knew, but he was certain. She did not respond, lips thin, betraying nothing. "I'm simply overjoyed you came to meet me here." He smirked; he hadn't realized he was no longer falling, that the dusty sky had vanished and become a colorless void. "Since you have seen fit to see to my request, I wish to make my prayer to you. I ask that hanyou be made equal to humans and youkai in all ways-"_

_ "And you are a fool." King Rat's face froze at her reply. She seized his shoulders between her palms and looked him in the eyes. "Do you know why hanyou fall between humans and youkai on the wheel of reincarnation?" She was silent- he had no answer. "The spirits of hanyou are too wise to be youkai, but too wild to be human. An unfulfilled life is your reward for your violence in a previous life, as devout as you may have been. And yet you learn nothing." Her grip tightened. "You have tormented my beloved children, you spit on an offer from the gods, and you were even more vile than your last life could have even imagined." She shook her head, ashamed, and his heart pounded in his chest. He didn't- couldn't- feel shame, but he did feel like he was being thrown against a wall. "Some hanyou learn. Aka and Gojyo, they've learned to at least somewhat control their soul's violent tendencies- or at least Aka had, until you got to him. You are even lower than a youkai. And for that, I will give you what you truly wish."_

_ He squirmed in her grip, but it was no use. Kanzeon Bosatsu smirked as she began to compress his body in her hands. He screamed as he felt his body shrink."You know, over the many years I have watched this world, I have gained a certain affection for rats. They will do anything to survive. They'll taste poison in hopes of healing through it, they glean through the trash heaps to find the greatest treasures, and though their lives are short, they live them to the fullest. Rats don't survive- they live." She squeezed him tight between her hand. He had no mouth to scream as he felt his body warp and collapse. He found one last cry as his body died, wretched and pained, but Kanzeon Bosatsu's heart held no mercy for him. "The realm of beasts suits you. Perhaps a few dozen lifetimes escaping the jaws of snakes will atone for the four thousand and six souls you have corrupted." She opened her clasped hands and let a wriggling, wormlike rat pup fall from her palms to the world below. "As you said. Nothing but a rat."_

* * *

**(Lyrics start at: "And now we'****ve seen your power.")**

A soft half-moon was overhead when Gojyo opened his eyes, and he felt his jaw drop at the face that met his. "I thought you hated me. I'm glad to see you, though." Hakuryu trilled as he sat up, gently nuzzling his cheek before flitting off. He almost immediately hunched over in pain again, trying hard and failing to catch his breath, and he quickly surveyed his surroundings. The other three Sanzo party members were all around him, getting to their knees and rising as well. Hakkai quickly came to Gojyo's side and offered him a hand, but he shook his head as he spotted the party's guest. "Aka."

He pointed over Hakkai's shoulder. Aka was already on his feet, standing stark upright, head tilted back. Around them, more hanyou soldiers sprung up from the ground like unearthly plants, quickly dissolving to dust with weak moans and whimpers. Aka, however, turned his gaze skywards, arms limp at his sides. His spear dropped from his hands and broke.

"Thank you," he said. His voice was weak- it seemed this bare murmur was all he could muster. "You... you freed us. Thank you."

"What are you talkin' about?" Goku stumbled a few steps closer to him, but fell to his knees, hugging his middle. "Ow... my tummy hurts from empty..."

"Me, and Ryuji? We're free now. We're going to go home. I'm going back to Heaven." His wild, curly hair began to dissolve before their eyes, crumbling away like dust in the wind. His fingers and feet began to disintegrate as well.

"Aka, no, you can't die!" Gojyo cried, reaching his hands out. Aka grinned, bright and wide, showing his teeth.

"But if I die, I go to Heaven. And my brother will be there. And the General." He tilted his head back further as more of his body crumbled and blew away. His chest began to vanish. "Thank you. I'm sure I'll see my brother soon, please send him along as quickly as you can. Thank you." His legs were gone now, and his forehead cracked away, cast away in the open air. Sanzo, though weary and weak from hunger, braced Gojyo's shoulders as he flailed forward.

"Aka, no! Please! Don't you get it, I am your father now! I can't let you die too!" Gojyo cried, trying to reach and grab Aka, but Sanzo held him back. Aka grinned still, though his mouth was all that remained of his face. His torso was gone but for the space that contained his heart.

"I'm sorry, I don't want to disappoint you... but I don't know if Yohei and Eiji will ever come back to this world now. I'm sorry. My father is waiting." His wide, genuine smile was the last thing they saw of him.

Gojyo took a few deep breaths, and screamed. He collapsed around himself, clutching his stomach in agony.

"RYUJI!" He wailed. "Your brother... BRING HIM BACK! COME BACK, YOU ROTTEN BASTARDS!"

* * *

_As now you go wandering home..._

**End Notes:** That's the end of Nezuoh. But our story is not over...

What did you think of the end I gave him? I gave two of those who he wronged the most- one and five in his top five, to be specific- their shot at him, but unfortunately, slots two, three, and four didn't even get to touch him. Seeing as number four would have killed him immediately- one bullet and done- and the two tied for slots two and three were either unborn or beyond sanity, I couldn't think of a better option. (And no, I can't decide which boy got it worse from him. It depends on what you think Nezuoh did to either one while they were imprisoned. It also depends if you think it is worse to die or to have to live with your trauma.) But the important thing is, what did you guys think?

One note: I actually came up with an additional idea for this chapter while at work this past Monday and put it directly into the chapter. (It was the bit where Hakkai reminded Aka that bad things would happen if Ryuji were reborn into the sealed realm.) I have this bad tendency to come up with good ideas while working, and I think I know why: all the hand sanitizer dispensers at my workplace are labeled "Gojo." But it's come to the point where I've been trying to get stray ideas under control by typing them down in the notepad on my cellphone. Bottom line- the hell is wrong with me?

Now, next week is the omake. After that... okay, we have to have this conversation. Chapter 18 is my least favorite chapter. Not that the writing quality is any less, but I hate that I had to write it. And this is the one that has to have a double chapter post so that you can skip it if you need to. Yeah, that whole "bucket warning" I was mentioning earlier? This is the chapter I need it for. This is the chapter that almost made me list this story as "horror." This is the chapter that single-handedly earned this story the rating it got. Therefore, in two weeks, there will be chapters 18 and 19. And if you should need to skip chapter 18 for chapter 19, worry not, I will post a chapter summary. I like you guys too much to torture you any more than necessary.

With that said...

Did you enjoy? Did you not enjoy? Review!  
Suggestions? Comments? Things you want to see? Review!  
Love it? Hate it? Opinions? Review!  
Anything? Review. Nothing? Review anyway!

Until next week!


	19. Omake 2: The Ol' Switcheroo

**King Rat, No Mercy**

**Author's Notes: **As I write, I have two major projects due in a few days, three finals barreling towards me, four hours of sleep, and a whole lot of silly. Let's get our giggles on!

But first, review responses!

RodiSquall- HNNNG. I still can't answer your questions about Aka and Ryuji. I want to give you spoilers just to relieve your tension, but you'll be better rewarded if you wait! I promise, the answer will be in the story! Regarding future story ideas- the one you suggested was not one that had crossed my mind, and I'm not sure that's a story I could write. But I do have some ideas that I'll bring up in a few chapters. As for warm fuzzies... not so much this week. Just a laugh at the expense of our heroes.

D-chan- Yeah, King Rat definitely got what he deserved there. If he weren't such a monster about it, I'd probably feel bad for him, but then he was a complete monster.

Guest- Time will tell, but there's one more piece of the puzzle yet to fall into place.

We're not here to talk about puzzles this week, though! Nope, just a few laughs. It's an idea I kicked around a little bit, and it's the realization that the original King Rat would have been a very different story if the initial events had been even a little different...

**Disclaimer: **It's still not mine. Uru sai. In addition, I apologize in advance if the following material should be found inappropriate or offensive.

* * *

**Omake 2:** **The Ol' Switcheroo**

_What if the "events" of _**King Rat**_ happened, but..._

… _Goku took Gojyo's place?_

The waiter dashed into the kitchen, frantic. The griping from the dining room was audible over the sizzling of the stove and skillets. "The buffet trays are out of rice again!"

"What, for real?!" The sous chef groaned. "We don't have any more rice in here!"

"The teriyaki chicken is empty too. And there's no sauteed string beans!" Another waiter added as he got into the kitchen.

"For gods' sakes, we're running out of everything! Is that one guy at table four still here?!" The sous chef rushed to the window to peek out into the dining room.

"Yeah, it's him and his three buddies." The first waiter shuddered. "Except the first three aren't eating anymore, they're just watching. How can that little boy eat that much?! Where the hell is he putting it?!"

In the restaurant proper, Gojyo staggered back to the table, wiping his mouth. "You good?" Hakkai asked with a frown.

"Dude, I can't watch this anymore," Gojyo moaned as he slumped into his chair again. "I seriously almost lost my lunch that time."

"What's wrong?" Goku asked through a mouthful of fried peppers. A stack of empty plates ten high had formed next to him. Another thirty had already been removed. Gojyo's face blanched as Goku swallowed and shoveled in another heaping forkful, still staring expectantly for an answer. Gojyo gagged and stumbled back towards the restroom. Goku shrugged and continued to eat. "I can't believe they're letting us eat all of this for so cheap!" Sanzo was stuck in an extended facepalm.

"You know, the phrase 'eating for two' isn't meant to be taken literally," Hakkai suggested anxiously.

"Yeah, but the baby is hungry!" Goku chirped, patting his somehow-still-flat stomach. He cleared his plate, licked most of the sauce off, and added it to the stack.

"I cannot believe this is happening," Sanzo muttered into his palm.

"Well, I don't mind. I think my tummy is finally full." Goku considered this for a moment. "Wait, maybe not."

"Stop." Sanzo yanked Goku back down as he went to get up. A waiter had come and begun to whisper to Hakkai. Hakkai sighed as the waiter, glancing at Goku with fear in his eyes, retreated.

"We need to leave. Apparently, Goku has emptied seventy-five percent of their pantry."

"Aw, man!" Goku moaned.

"This is the seventh restaurant we're not allowed to return to on our way back from India, as well," Hakkai added. Goku whined and began to try and lick some of the sauce off the plate. Hakkai simply sighed and fingered through his wallet for a tip. "Honestly, if you're like this at eight weeks, I can't imagine what our food costs are going to be in six months. If I knew who was responsible for this, I don't know what I would do..." Sanzo simply groaned and leaned back in his seat.

"This couldn't possibly get any worse."

* * *

… _Sanzo were pregnant instead of Gojyo?_

"So, you're... expecting." The monocle slid off of Hakkai's nose, as he stared, slackjawed, at Sanzo, who was shivering with rage. There was a beat of silence, as the universe weighed heavy on all of their shoulders as the news sunk in... and then Gojyo and Goku both burst into laughter. Sanzo roared and slammed his fist down on the table.

"It's NOT funny," he growled, and both of them put their fists over their mouth to try and muffle their giggles. Hakkai was stunned, slowly shaking his head and mumbling to himself.

"How... no, I shouldn't ask how."

"The same way as anyone else," Sanzo hissed in measured, very quiet tones.

"Oh. Oh, my." Hakkai fixed his monocle back in place. "So, is there-"

"Yes. There is a father." Sanzo was grinding his teeth together hard.

"Dude, no way!" Goku interjected excitedly. "It must be some sort of magic, or divine intervention! Did the gods put the baby in you?!" Sanzo pulled out his pistol, and Goku dodged behind Hakkai.

"Surely you know who it is," Hakkai suggested, and Sanzo slowly turned malice-filled eyes towards Gojyo.

"No way. Nu-uh. Don't look at me." Gojyo waved his hands in front of him. "I'm a hanyou, remember? Shootin' blanks."

"Well, who the hell else could it have been?!" Sanzo growled.

"Wait, you mean you two-" Hakkai gasped. Sanzo gritted his teeth harder, as Gojyo grinned.

"Dude, you didn't know? Guess that's fair, I mean, the two of us kind of agreed not to talk about it." Gojyo smirked viciously as Sanzo's eye failed to cease twitching. "Well, since he already said, I guess I can give you all the dirty details-"

Fifteen minutes later, a doctor in the town below the mountain spotted smoke rising from above. "My my," he murmured to himself. "Must be a funeral up at the temple. That is an awful lot of smoke, though." He spotted a man in priest's robes stalking down the mountain path by himself, covered in blood, ash, and soot and carrying an empty can of gasoline. "Excuse me, sir, do you know what's going on up there?" Sanzo slowly turned his glare at the doctor. He examined him up and down silently, taking in his doctor's coat and the apothecary sign over his head.

"YOU," he growled in an inhuman voice. "GIVE ME AN ABORTION. NOW."

* * *

… _Hakkai was the father instead of Sanzo?_

"Come along, darling!" Hakkai's singsong voice cut through the crowd and his companions' ears, resulting in three groans at various volumes. Goku looked only a little embarrassed as he hauled a stack of bags and packages down the road through the street market. Sanzo followed, clearly trying not to be seen as their fourth took up the rear. There could be absolutely no doubt that Gojyo was eight months pregnant, and the fact that he'd been somehow forced into a cotton-candy and fairy-dust pink smock with an embarrassingly large bow on the back did not help in the slightest. Hakkai was leading the way through every single booth, looking for anything a new parent might need, wearing the biggest smile one could imagine.

"This is humiliating," Sanzo grumbled as he lit up another cigarette. "It's bad enough that we're wasting time here, but where are we going to put all this junk?"

"Oh, I'm sure we can make room!" Hakkai chirped energetically. Even Hakuryu's chirping sounded exasperated at this. Hakkai noticed what Sanzo was doing and reached out to swipe Sanzo's cigarette from his lips. "And no smoking around the baby." Sanzo ground his teeth and stormed away to smoke elsewhere.

"And why the hell do I have to wear pink?!" Gojyo snapped.

"Ah, but you look so cute!" Hakkai's clasped his hands in adoration. "It suits you so well- and it's very clearly the uniform of a mother-to-be!"

"I ain't a girl, dammit!" Gojyo grumbled, trying to cover himself with his folded arms. "We're shopping anyway, can I buy something a little more dignified?"

"No, we can't afford it." Hakkai tapped his nose, leaning uncomfortably close. "We have to buy bottles and diapers and onesies and a stroller and little dresses-"

"Can we buy clothes that aren't pink?" Gojyo's cheeks were pinker than his shirt and the accessories he was complaining about.

"No. We're having a girl," Hakkai replied confidently.

"How the hell do you know?!"

"I don't." Hakkai clapped his hands together eagerly. "But even if it is a boy, he won't know the difference until he's at least ten, so until then, dresses and pigtails it is!"

"He'll know the difference way before then!" Gojyo protested in a whine, but it fell on deaf ears. Hakkai had been distracted by a table of lace booties and headbands. Goku grinned around his stack of packages.

"Dude, Hakkai, you're gonna be the best dad ever!"

"You have got to be fucking kidding me," Gojyo moaned. "If I had to get knocked up, could it have been by anyone worse?"

"I can't even imagine," Sanzo muttered as he rejoined them. Gojyo slowly shook his head as Hakkai continued to browse the stalls with Goku at his heels. Both men sighed and put their hands over their foreheads, regretting their every life decision that got them to this point and completely ignoring Hakkai's joy:

"Ooh, look, it's got pink lace on it!"

* * *

**End Notes: **In retrospect, I'm honestly a little disappointed with this omake, specifically Sanzo's segment. Half the time, I'm not even sure his punchline is funny; it's much darker comedy than I would usually go for, and in most cases, I would consider it to be fairly offensive. (My only reassurance is that it is, in fact, fictional and not even canon to this story.) I just initially thought it hilarious for a priest to demand an abortion... and you write the story you have, not the one you haven't thought of, right?

For Goku's segment, the phrase I would use to describe it is "there is nothing not funny about that," and I'm usually not one to laugh at my own jokes. I would have made it the closer, but the transition between Goku's and Sanzo's was just too smooth.

As for Hakkai and Gojyo... back when I first read the series, I totally shipped that. But the fact is that for the kind of story I wanted to write, those two are too cute together. Sure, Gojyo would gripe the whole time, but Hakkai's affection for him would eventually win him over. But in this continuity, even though Hakkai is probably the closest to being "feminine" in the group, I'm keeping him straighter than canon!Gojyo is, and KR!Hakkai has zero sexual interest in Gojyo. Hard to believe now- were I writing this story ten years ago, it would be nothing like it and probably TERRIBLE.

Well, I've bored you with anecdotal blathering long enough. Next week, once all my school work is done for the semester, there will be two chapters posted, one of which most of you will probably want to or need to skip. As I mentioned last week, I will post a summary for the offensive chapter at the beginning of the non-offensive one. Hopefully this will make up for the horror I have wrought.

Did you get a good laugh out of this? Which one was your favorite? Review!  
Did you enjoy? Did you not enjoy? Review!  
Questions? Comments? Suggestions? Predictions? Dread? Review!  
Love it? Hate it? Opinions? Review!  
Anything? Nothing? Review!

Until next week!


	20. Nascence

**King Rat, No Mercy**

**Author Notes: **There should be another chapter posted shortly after this one so if you should need to skip this chapter, you can. A chapter summary will be posted therein. I apologize in advance. Review responses and et cetera will be in the next chapter.

**WARNING: THE MATERIAL YOU ARE ABOUT TO READ MAY BE CONSIDERED GROTESQUE OR DISTURBING AND MAY BE INAPPROPRIATE FOR THOSE WITH WEAK STOMACHS OR VIVID IMAGINATIONS. READER DISCRETION IS ADVISED. **

**Disclaimer: **May God have mercy on my non-profiting soul.

* * *

**18: Nascence**

Gojyo screamed and pounded his fists on the ground under him like a toddler deprived of a toy, his words nonsensical through his hysterics. Only now did Hakkai realized that blood was pooling under him, flowing from an unseen gash like a river. He grabbed Sanzo's arm and pointed. No words were needed. Sanzo pulled Goku back, and Hakkai quickly dragged Gojyo onto his back and began to tear the shapeless frock away, spreading it under him and tearing parts of it away. He pulled Gojyo's pants off and tossed them aside. He then threw some of the rags from the frock and his canteen to Sanzo. "Wet these." He wiped his hands off in the canteen water as Sanzo poured, trying to calm his heart as Gojyo thrashed on the ground. Hakkai was already shaking to his fingers- Sanzo was sure that his hunger, thirst, and exhaustion were trying to catch up to him. "Hold him down. If he can't control his jaw, gag him. I won't have him biting his tongue off."

"What the hell is going on?" Goku whined, rubbing his head anxiously. "I thought Gojyo wasn't-"

"You mean you can't tell he was made to be?" Hakkai murmured, his fingers twitching as he tried to think. "Whatever has been put inside him wants out." He threw the pants towards Goku, along with his flint. "Find some kindling and burn these."

"I dunno, he doesn't smell right," Goku mumbled as he scampered back. He was quaking as well, glancing frantically between Gojyo and Sanzo.

"Burn them somewhere you can cover your ears and keep your eyes on the fire," Sanzo instructed in addendum. His stomach growled angrily, but he ignored it to try and hold Gojyo down by his shoulders. Gojyo grimaced up at him, mouthing something inane between his panicked cries. Sanzo flinched and tried to block the noise out.

Hakkai found the opening he'd pulled Yohei and Eiji from a year before, though it was already soaked with blood. He had been certain that it had vanished after their birth, but it seemed to be back with a vengeance, raw and ragged. "At least the goddess has this much mercy," he murmured. "I don't have any herbs to give him, but I can at least dull his senses." He rubbed Gojyo's forehead to try and reduce the pain he was feeling, but Gojyo rejected his hand with a twist of his head. His screaming still dissolved to whimpers and winces. "Gojyo, please listen to me. He's trying to be born. You need to help him," Hakkai urged gently. Gojyo couldn't look at him. He instead tried to rip at his flesh with his fingernails.

"Out... get out... you..." He panted again, and shouted wordlessly.

"Hold his arms back. He's delirious," Hakkai muttered and rubbed Gojyo's forehead again, only to be shaken off a second time. Sanzo nodded, then grabbed and pinned Gojyo's elbows down. Gojyo didn't resist his grip, shaking and quaking. Hakkai briskly palpated his belly, ignoring that Gojyo was grinding his teeth. He shook his head. "I literally can't make heads or tails of it, I can't feel anything solid."

"That's not right," Sanzo muttered.

"I can feel a heartbeat, but no body." He lowered his head. "I don't know what to expect here."

"Get it out," Gojyo growled under his breath, his eyes very far away. He clenched his fists and repeated in a yell, "Get it out!"

"Gojyo, if you can understand me, you need to push." Hakkai held Gojyo's right ankle down with one hand and reached into the opening with the other. Gojyo whimpered, not out of pain but of shock. Hakkai focused for a few minutes as Gojyo writhed and panted anxiously. "These contractions are coming fast. Were you trying to hold it back?" Gojyo couldn't reply, still breathing heavily and rapidly, trying to keep his mouth shut tight. Blood- no, something thicker than blood poured out of him when Hakkai extracted his hand. Hakkai hid the horror on his face, wiping his hand off on the dismantled frock. The thick blood pulsed from him with his every heartbeat, flooding the ground around Hakkai's knees.

"Answer him," Sanzo muttered into Gojyo's ear. Gojyo shook his head. "Answer me," he demanded. Gojyo opened his mouth, but blood spilled out rather than words. Sanzo turned Gojyo's head onto its side as it poured, thick and dark, from his mouth and nose. His knees jerked back as he coughed hard, trying to retch the blood out. Hakkai reached forward and held his chest down, still trying to keep his legs from kicking and thrashing.

"Make it stop," Gojyo finally croaked, as the last of the blood drained from his nose. "It's... it's all blood..."

"He's going to be useless. Numb him," Sanzo demanded. "Make him feel nothing, he'll gain nothing from being awake."

"No!" Gojyo shrieked, thrashing and throwing Sanzo back with strength he didn't possess a moment before. "Let me feel it! I don't want to feel nothing!"

"God!" Hakkai gasped, pinning Gojyo's thighs down as he spotted something crowning in the gash. Gojyo bellowed like an animal as something thicker than blood burst through the opening, splattering onto the torn tunic. Hakkai picked it up and promptly dropped it- it was something like a piece of thin leather, only the size of a human hand, and small chunks of gray muscle peeled off of it. Hakkai was silent, pushing the thing away, and held Gojyo's ankles down. Sanzo gripped Gojyo's hand and held his chest down with his free arm. "Whatever this is, it must come out."

Gojyo forced another scream through his throat. His back arched, his belly bulged, and Hakkai forced his hand into the opening again. Something large, round, and wet was stuck in it, and Hakkai had to use both hands to twist and extract it. It was dripping thick, tar-like blood, deeper crimson than any of them had seen in a human being before. As the blood sloughed off, it became clear that the object in Hakkai's hands was a misshapen, malformed ribcage, twisted, with hunks of muscle and meat dripping off of it. Gojyo wailed again as he saw it. Hakkai tried to pull it away, but it was tangled in thin cords that strung back into Gojyo, and Hakkai could only keep pulling it out. Gojyo clawed at his own face as it spurted out of him in chunks, until it finally stuck on the inside. He tried to pull the thin thread harder, but it neither broke nor budged.

"Fuck... shit... make it stop!" Gojyo cried out, trying to pull away from Hakkai. Sanzo pressed his arms onto Gojyo's chest, forcing him to stay down.

"Calm down," he muttered into Gojyo's ear, a hint of a plea in his voice. Gojyo only cried out again, a contraction rippling his every muscle, and the thread began to slide out again. The blood dripping from it was black now, thicker than stone, and reeked of rotten ginger and death. Hakkai forced both hands into Gojyo once more, his brow wrinkled as he gripped the form within and pulled. A tangle of veins and arteries came loose when he yanked them out again, bits of muscle tied within. Parts of tiny organs that looked like they had been chewed up or crushed spilled forth after it, like a dam released. They poured out onto the ground, splattering as they hit the ground and dissembled into quivering lumps of foul-smelling flesh, purple like a bruise.

Gojyo stomped his feet on the ground and howled in anguish as more flowed from him, and bones began to spurt out of him, cracking and yellow, rotting away by the second as Hakkai pulled them loose. Most of them were barely human, twisted and warped, like someone had taken the body and tried to compress it or put something in it that didn't belong. Sanzo finally couldn't stand the screaming and forced the rag into Gojyo's mouth, leaving him only able to plead for an end to his torture with his teary, desperate eyes. Those eyes widened further, then squeezed shut as Hakkai pulled out more skin and muscle. Sanzo tried to force Gojyo's chin up to keep him from looking, but Gojyo shook him off again. He opened his eyes again, and Sanzo saw that a blood vessel had burst in his right eye, reddening the white and letting blood streak his face with his tears. His next scream was barely muffled, as something round was pushed into the gap. It popped out of him with only a little further coaxing- it was part of an underformed skull, half-covered in skin that slowly slid away. A single eye tumbled from one socket, blue iris visible under all the blood.

Gojyo couldn't stop screaming now, his face turning blue, unable to get air fast enough, and Sanzo could only impotently grip his hands and try to hold him still. More veins, knotted and twisted, followed, but they were drier now, slick and sticky but no longer dripping. The smell, however, was worse than ever, like a mass grave set aflame. The veins stuck again, and Hakkai, with shaking hands, reached into the opening one more time. He found something solid and yanked it into the open air.

A small heart, raw, unconnected, red and blue, sat in his palms. The veins it came with were dry, thinner than hair, as they crumbled away. Gojyo screamed into the rag again, not in pain, but in horror.

The heart beat once. Twice. Thrice. And stopped.

It was completely still, its red hue fading to gray. The child-sized heart and all that had come before it dried, cracked, and began to crumble away. Gojyo's wide eyes flooded with tears anew, and Sanzo pulled the rag from his mouth.

"It's over," Sanzo murmured into his ear. Hakkai doubled over onto his knees, staring at his blood-dripping hands, shocked. "It's gone, Gojyo. You're finished. It won't hurt anymore."

Gojyo managed a few shallow, raw breaths through his mouth. Sanzo knew he had seen the whole thing, every detail, he knew that his mind had to be full of turmoil. Unable to speak further, Sanzo tried to hold his hand, but Gojyo couldn't hold on. He couldn't collect his thoughts, and he could only cry out in wordless, mindless pain. Hakkai shuddered, still watching the blood slide off his hands, his knees shaking. He very slowly wiped his hands off on his pant legs, looking ever more horrified at the red that stained his entire form. Gojyo's wail was like a death knell, like a fox's shriek, like the dying gasp of a rat, and Sanzo could only stare, horrified but impotent. Hakkai finally threw himself forward and slammed an open palm onto Gojyo's forehead, and he was silent.

"Sleep," Hakkai mumbled, shaking his head. "Sleep. Sleep. God, just sleep."

"Is it over?" Goku whimpered from under his covered ears. "Can... can I look now?"

"No. We burn everything and bury whatever won't burn," Hakkai growled, forcing his shivering body to stand. "Everything this touched, put it in the fire. I never want to see these clothes again!" Hakkai began to tear his stained sleeves off, a few weak sobs afflicting his throat. Sanzo lifted Gojyo's limp form from the foul fabric. Though asleep, his eyes were wide open, his mouth hung slack. He looked like a drowned rag doll, drenched with his own bodily fluids and shivering through his nightmares.

Sanzo could only ask for two things now: first, for rain to wipe everything clean; second, to forget that something like this could have ever happened. This was not birth. This was birth and death entwined, and in their sick writhing and hellish copulation, they ejaculated onto the body of an infant and left them with what remained.

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**End Notes:** ... See you next chapter, kids.


	21. Rest Calm

**King Rat, No Mercy**

**Author Notes:** Chapter 18 summary:

After watching Aka disintegrate in front of him, Gojyo drops to the ground with labor pains. Hakkai and Sanzo quickly make ready for the birth as best as they can on empty stomachs and exhausted minds. Goku is told to start a fire away from the scene, cover his ears, and avert his eyes. Hakkai discovers that he cannot feel the "baby's" head or feet. Sanzo pins Gojyo down as Hakkai tries to force everything inside of him out. Sanzo insists that Hakkai knock Gojyo out so that he does not have to watch, but Gojyo, panicking, refuses to be numbed again. With considerable pain and effort, Gojyo begins to produce a disjointed set of child-sized human parts, much to the horror of all three. In spite of what is clearly a hopeless situation, Gojyo continues to labor, and Hakkai pulls away more and more of a broken body, including proof that the pieces belong to Ryuji. The last thing to emerge is a small heart that beats three times in Hakkai's palms before ceasing motion and disintegrating. Horrified, Gojyo can only scream mindlessly until Hakkai knocks him out. Hakkai orders that any remnants of the birth be destroyed in the fire, along with Gojyo's and his clothes. Mortified at the turn of events, he begins to rend his own clothes away. Sanzo silently mourns the fate that has befallen Gojyo, pitying him his grief and what they are certain is the loss of Ryuji.

… This was the only logical conclusion I could draw to the events that had befallen our heroes. We have found our new low. I know, I'm a twisted bastard, and I hated myself when I saw what I had wrought. Editing it made me sick to my stomach. Hell, even running over the events in my mind when trying to write the summary gave me the shakes. But I can't unwrite something; once I determine a path, I can't diverge. The good news is, the only place we can go from here is up.

Review responses:

RodiSquall: Your question from chapter 16 is answered as of chapter 18. Ryuji's soul did not accept King Rat's interference, which is half of why the rebirth failed. Remember, what he was doing to Gojyo was a test run, he did not know how it would turn out. Also, I would probably say that he was infusing his soul into Ryuji not to keep him safe, but instead to be able to call him 'son.' Nezuoh wanted to have children of his own, but even with the Callback to Spirits allowing him to revive the lost souls, they would not be his biological inheritors. Ryuji would have been his son if he had managed to put himself inside of him. As for the boys and their ultimate fate... patience. I promise, no stone will be left unturned; what happened to the boys will be made clear soon enough.

And yes, Hakkai is scary. You know it'd only take a second for him to have his way with the genetic code!

KakashiisWifey: Hakkai would be the logical conclusion if the Goddess were to randomly decide to knock one of them up, as he is the most motherly (maybe that contributes to the whole "scary" thing!) but I could never make Hakkai the uke. I don't know why, but I just don't think it'd work. But his mood swings would be terrifying, if only for the huge change. One second, incredibly happy because he loves children and babies and he's happy to be having one... and then "Get out of my way or I'll kill you."

D-chan: I don't think Sanzo would ever let it get that far. Sure it'd be cute, but I'd hate to see Sanzo's mood swings! Gojyo was bad enough; "Ahh, morning sickness sucks, my back hurts, this sucks..." Sanzo would be more like, "I WILL MURDER EVERYTHING YOU LOVE AND EAT IT." Except that wouldn't be a mood swing, that would be him for nine months straight.

**Disclaimer:** Nothing is mine!

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**19: Rest Calm**

The sky was its usual cerulean blue, the road its usual tawny brown. The dusty plain stretched out before them like a lion in the sun. Plant life was fairly sparse, and getting thinner the further they drove, but the air was fresh and the water running through the brook near where the Jeep had parked smelled sweet and clean. However, enjoying the scenery of the world they knew was the furthest thing from the Sanzo party's minds. Goku briefly turned to the back seat as he waited in the shotgun seat. Sanzo was carefully fastening Gojyo's seat belt, and Gojyo was still catatonic and gone from even the slightest semblance of consciousness. Hakkai drummed his fingers impatiently on the wheel. "Is he sleeping soundly?" he murmured. Sanzo nodded, and clambered back into the rear passenger's seat. "Let's get underway again." Goku felt his heart shiver with dismay. He folded his hands, and prayed silently.

_Gojyo, please stop screaming. Please stop crying. I'm so scared of what's going on in your head. Your eyes are wide open like you're seeing everything, but you're blind and deaf and numb. I know you're sad, and I know why, too. You just watched both of your kids die. My little cousins... it hurts my heart to think about it. I loved them too, and my heart hurts because of that. I don't really understand it, but I still feel it._

_ But I know Hakkai loved them too. And I know that's why he's upset, at least I'm pretty sure. His knuckles are white from gripping the wheel so tight, his elbows are shaking because he keeps locking them. I keep getting scared he's gonna crash, because he hasn't slept since it all happened and he swerves around like crazy. It's like if he drives fast enough and long enough, he'll blow everything from his head, or at least have an excuse for plowing us through a rock._

_ Sanzo's upset too. I can tell from the look in his eyes. He's not crying, I don't think he knows how, but I see him rubbing his nose on your shoulder when you shake, and I saw his hand rubbing your stomach in his sleep. Like his dream-self is trying to ask them to come back, telling them, 'Right here, right here. It's where you came from, it's where you belong.' I bet Sanzo would even do it for you, just the way you did for him. He'd put them in his tummy and pull them back out when they were fixed. But we can't. None of us can. _

_ We all want them back. I think we'll settle for having you back. I believe in miracles, though, and I bet if we look, we'll find them out there, somewhere. Aka-chan was still smiling at me, so I know he must know something we don't. They must still be with us, somehow. But we won't be able to look if you're blind and deaf and numb. So I'm asking you, as a friend: please, please, please wake up!_

Hakkai revved the engine into high gear. Hakuryu whined in complaint, but he simply patted the dashboard. "The further away we are, the happier I'll be," he murmured to the Jeep. Hakuryu cooed sadly, indicating understanding but certainly not approval. He shook his head, staring at the vast, open road again. His mind drifted:

_I held his beating heart in my hand, and it spoke to me._

_ "Field Marshal? What are you doing here?"_

_ I don't know what to say, how to respond, but my heart speaks back anyway. "I'm not a Field Marshal."_

_ I find myself pulled into a dark void somewhere in either my head or someone else's, staring at the back of a blonde-haired boy. He's thin and frail, his shoulders are bony. The boy won't face me, and I can't ask him to._

_ "I'm sorry. I was mistaken. You just seem like someone I know. I don't think you and I have ever met." His shoulders slouch._

_ "Not until now, no. I believe you're dying in my arms."_

_ "Ah, is that so?" He sounds intrigued, but not surprised. "I thought I was already gone. I know I've never really been all here for a while, not since I last touched the Goddess' hand. I think I was in the dark for a while, I suppose I thought I was dead then. I don't remember much of the last day or so- just the feeling of someone trying to touch me and me saying no. But you know? There are worse ways to go." I can read his expression as easily as if his nose were ten centimeters from mine; he's smiling, laughing at himself. "I do remember being warm, up until a few seconds ago. And I'm in no pain, really. And I have your voice to see me off. Can I just ask you one favor?"_

_ "Anything."_

_ "Please tell my father that I'm not mad at him. That I do forgive him whatever little wrongs he did, those little lies he told. And I hope he'll forgive me for dying. I'm sorry. I love him. I knew him for four days, and I love him."_

_ "I'll try and pass it on."_

_ "Thank you. Good bye."_

_ He's gone, the darkness is gone, and a tiny, still heart sits in my palms. I want to retch and scream and tear my hair, I want to pull my befouled skin off, I want to rip the scenery to ribbons. But I know none of that will do me any good. I push that haunting little voice from my mind, I shut down everything I don't need, I take control in demolishing the tainted clothes and what's left of Ryuji's body. That little heart will never beat again, and I wish it weren't so. I did love that heart, the boy attached to it, the unassuming, flat sea inside it._

_ No screaming, no weeping, will benefit any of us. I will push it under and push forward. And yet, in my determination, my old scars start to ache._

_ Kannon, why? Didn't you love them? Aren't they your children too?_

Hakkai shivered as he realized he'd begun to drift off the road again. He focused his mind and glanced into the rear view mirror to the back seat. Sanzo was tearing a piece of bandage off their roll to make a fresh compress for Gojyo. Gojyo was exactly as he had been for the past two days. Hakkai was certain Sanzo's thoughts were unfathomable, so he could only wonder about Gojyo.

_How can I drive on without knowing where you've gone? Dear friend, where has your mind been these past two days?_

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**(Suggested Track: "Rest Calm," Nightwish)**

Two days. Two hours. Two minutes. All of those concepts were nothing but nonsense words to Gojyo. So was any other word, for that matter. He could only vaguely remember a hand over his eyes, and he was off into the darkness. He couldn't tell if he was rising or falling, if he was in water or air. He wasn't even entirely certain he _was_ anything at all.

After an indeterminate amount of unmeasurable time, it became clear to him that he was upside-down. He could feel blood rushing to his head, but it never made him dizzy. For what little will he had to move his eyes, he could see nothing above or below him, and he was barely able to comprehend that those concepts even had a meaning. Above, below, up, down, it was all the same. The universe around him was gray-blue, fuzzy like white noise. His mind was completely and entirely empty, but for an insistent reminder from a voiceless somewhere to keep breathing.

It occurred to him- perhaps I am dreaming again. Perhaps I should wake. He tried to do so.

The sky vomited blood and rage at him. The universe was made entirely of stabbing knives and squeezing vices and hatred. There was a terrible, dissonant scream echoing in his ears.

His eyes closed again, his mind emptied, and returned to the blue-gray nothing. It may have been void, but it was at least peaceful. A face appeared in front of his- or had it been there all along?- eyes at level with his, feet drifting a meter away from his own. It took him a moment, but he recognized Kanzeon Bosatsu. He didn't- couldn't- react. She reached for him and held his shoulders as though to keep him steady.

"I'm sorry," she said, her eyes awash with pity. "I wish I could ease your mind, but as it is, there is far too much there to deal with all at once. Numbing you and keeping you numb is the kindest thing that can be done." He was certain he wanted to ask her something, but he couldn't recall what. He also wasn't certain he could move his mouth. She smiled sympathetically. "Why don't we try to sort some of these things out while we're here? Your friends want you to know how they really feel."

She vanished, but another face replaced hers. He wasn't sure how he recognized Goku- at the moment, he wasn't sure what a Goku was- but he did. Goku seemed to be right-side up, grinning into his face, his hands perched proudly on his hips, feet above his head. He spoke, in his usual, casual way; "Seriously dude, you thought I was dead? Come on!" He laughed. "You actually thought a bunch of alcoholic wash-ups could touch me? Man, you shouldn't worry like that. You'll give yourself a hernia." He beamed a little wider. "I'm fine, I promise you. I was never even in that stupid fortress until the day we came to rescue you. And I'm not mad at you, not even a little bit." His smile subdued; he looked more earnest. "I don't blame you. Stuff happens, y'know?"

"I'm sorry." It was the only thing Gojyo could find to say. Goku shook his head.

"Don't be. Just feel better. My little cousins need their dad back." His grin vanished, replaced by a more sober look. "We all need you back." His smile spread across his cheeks again, and he was gone. Gojyo knew nothing, felt nothing, until another familiar face appeared, upright and smiling, eyes open and looking into his.

"You still fear the dissolution of our friendship, and it's understandable. You've been abandoned before, and Heaven knows that no matter how long I stay by your side, you will always fear that I'll turn away the moment you inconvenience me." Hakkai focused a calm, reassuring gaze directly into Gojyo's eyes. His smooth, calm voice was almost hypnotic. "You didn't want to believe I would betray you, turn my back on you, and you were correct. But I suppose if it's beaten into your head, if you're given evidence you can't ignore, you must believe."

"I'm sorry," Gojyo murmured. He knew no other words, could not force his mouth and tongue to make anything but those. Hakkai shook his head the same way Goku had.

"Did you really think I'd blame you? None of this is your fault, this was nothing you asked for. Our bonds are stronger than that. I will simply have to prove that to you when you wake." Hakkai turned his head away, hiding a somber expression. "Please, do wake."

"I'm sorry." Gojyo blinked his eyes shut into darkness. He shook his head and tried to rouse himself once more.

He could see nothing. All he could hear was his own voice. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry." He felt like he was being set on fire, he was sure he could smell his skin burning off. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'M SORRY!" His voice kept screaming it, frantic and panicking, and the universe roared at him, deep darkness approaching like a diving hawk to swallow him. He knew it would rend him and tear him and chew his entrails, and he just kept screaming and screaming and screaming...

Eyes closed. Blue-gray. Peaceful. He was certain now that he was falling, and falling slowly. A new face appeared in front of his, one that Gojyo would not have been able to place before. General Kenren, upside-down like he was and only a few centimeters away, smirked at him.

"Yohei and Eiji. I like those names. It kinda suits the boys, y'know?" Their feet were level, their eyes at the same height. "Look, I know nothing I can say is gonna make you feel better. You're kind of a dumbass like that- believe me, I know. But I can tell you this." He poked one finger into his chest. "Your friends are good to you, and your kids need you."

"I'm sorry," was all Gojyo could say. He wanted to try and explain and apologize, but couldn't.

"Quit that," Kenren scoffed. "Ain't none of this your fault. That rat of rats. He tries to ruin my life again." Kenren folded his arms and snorted. "No wonder I kept that name locked away in my head. I wanted to remember the guy who took something that precious to me. I never wanted revenge, but I never wanted to forget, either. I just wanted to hate him, wherever I was, whatever I did, until I could get my boys back and forget he ever took them. But instead, you gave that name to yourself. So did he- you know, the guy, the blonde one. I guess King Rat can mean a lot of things. I wonder if he knew that when he picked it." Kenren looked away in thought. "Guess you wouldn't know."

I'm sorry. That was what Gojyo wanted to say. I'm sorry I took your boys. Did they come back to you safe? I'm sorry we couldn't protect them. I'm sorry I lost them. Are they okay? Are you there for them? What are you doing here with me?

"You want to know about me, huh?" Kenren smirked and cocked his brow. Gojyo could say nothing, but the surprise registered- how did he know? "Look, you were right when you told the kid I probably wouldn't be there waiting for them. I, uh, couldn't really stay in Heaven. They never really wanted me there anyway." He grinned sheepishly. "That Konzen guy, the one who said he was gonna take the boys, he an' I met again, a few years down the line, but face to face and proper-like. Don't think he bothered remembering my dumb ass anyway, but by that time, Konzen'd found a new kid. Nice kid, too, definitely needed our friendship. Long story there, anyway, you probably wouldn't believe it if I did tell you. Konzen, though..." Kenren's lips twitched with irritation, and he leaned a little closer to Gojyo and lowered his voice.

"When the two of us actually started to walk the same circles, he never once brought the boys up. I don't think he forgot 'em, I think he either really didn't remember I'd been their guardian, or he knew it'd just piss me off. But believe me when I say that I spent those years searching for a way to get them back. Hell, I even ventured down to the lower world a couple dozen times and tried to see if I could repeat the circumstances of their birth, if you know what I'm sayin', but none of the ladies I 'circumstanced' with ever turned up nothin'. Look, bottom line is, I had my chance. It's gone now. I ain't gonna be there. I'd apologize, but I don't think it'd mean a damn thing." He sighed. "Anyway, one last thing."

He looked Gojyo squarely in the eye, gripping his shoulder to try and keep his attention. "Ryuji's got a bad temper. You probably figured that out. It's just because he doesn't know what to do with himself when his head says one thing and his heart says another. You just gotta help him take it slow and sort it out. Aka's a crybaby, and for the same reason as his brother- when he doesn't know what else to do, he cries. From what I can tell, he grew out of it after he was tortured, but I'm pretty sure I preferred when he cried instead of getting angry. Let him express himself, he needs it. They're both good boys, they're eager to please, and they're just as cute as hell. Be good to them. I'm counting on you now."

"I'm sorry." Gojyo tried to shake his head 'no,' he wanted to explain- Ryuji's dead, I think Aka is too. Go back, look for them, they won't come to me, they need you. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Kenren only laughed, shaking his head sagely, and Gojyo doubled over.

His view turned, and he could no longer see Kenren. His body righted itself, his blood flowing naturally. His feet landed on solid ground. It was soft, forgiving ground, though he couldn't see it properly. The scenery seemed to paint itself in around him. A riverbank, late at night, high tide creeping up the shore. A few trees, a dirt road. A rolling river. A man in a muslin robe standing in the middle. Gojyo's instinct was to run away, far away, but he couldn't; his legs wouldn't move. Sanzo turned, noticed him, and reached one hand out.

"Either you will come here or I will come to you." It was not a threat, it was a promise. He was wearing a very strange smile, a look he'd never seen on Sanzo's face before. It was subtle, small; it didn't warp or twist his features, but it looked unusually kind next to his unusually soft eyes.

"I'm... I'm sorry." Gojyo shook his head.

"Don't be like that. You're confused, right? You're wondering if I'm real or not. You're wondering if I'm King Rat, stepping into your dreams to begin his torture anew." Sanzo hung his head. "And you know... you're right to wonder. But this I promise, I won't lie to you. Yes, I'm another illusion. I'm a figment of your imagination." Sanzo chuckled and looked back up, still smiling. "I'm only in your head." Gojyo didn't know what to say or do- Sanzo didn't _chuckle_. And he certainly didn't _smile_. Still, Gojyo could tell he wasn't lying. He took a few tentative steps towards the river.

Sanzo's smile spread wider, though only a little, and he continued, "The difference is, I'm not springing from your insecurities. Kanzeon Bosatsu communicated our sentiments to you. Those things you heard our friends say, those are their feelings. So, perhaps this is something you will never truly see or hear from me, if only because I don't have the power to say these things myself. I don't think the Sanzo you see in the waking world has this kind of strength. Please come to me." He held his hand out again, and this time, Gojyo had the courage to move towards him, his feet splashing into the water. Sanzo approached, water dripping from his belt down, and though Gojyo tried to take his hand, Sanzo instead wrapped his arms around his waist and rested his hands on his hips. Gojyo pulled back, but Sanzo kept him at arm's length. "Let me try and dispel some of these fears. All I ask is that you be honest with me."

"I... I'll try." Gojyo was relieved he still had other words in his vocabulary, but he resisted the urge to celebrate it.

Sanzo took a deep, anxiety-filled breath, and began. "You have had doubts, doubts you've been afraid to bring up to me. You doubt my intentions." Gojyo nodded. "You're right to do so. I don't honestly know what I'm doing with you. I don't know what I'm doing in a relationship with you. Perhaps I shouldn't be. But I can't stop." Sanzo's odd smile was surprising. "I don't know where we're going, but I do know that for whatever idiotic reason, I don't want a future without you in it." Gojyo didn't know what to say, instead staring weakly at Sanzo's pale collarbone, so Sanzo continued. "You think I'm only interested in you because of our sons."

"What other reason do you have to be interested in me?" Gojyo's tongue was moving faster now, his lips able to form more sophisticated words, and he was starting to feel his energy come back to him. Sanzo shrugged.

"Dozens. But perhaps yes, I do want to try harder for the boys' sake. Perhaps their presence jumped things forward. Perhaps without them, I'd frustrate with you more easily. They may tie us together, but it doesn't mean I wouldn't want you otherwise."

"Sanzo, they're dead. Aren't they dead?" Gojyo pushed Sanzo away and turned away, folding his arms tight across his chest. "I killed them."

"I asked you to be honest," Sanzo reminded him sadly. "Aka and Ryuji... Eiji and Yohei..." He lowered his eyes. "No, I don't know the truth there. But there's nothing we can do about that right now. I do know that you would never hurt them intentionally. Whether or not they are dead, you did not kill them. I will not be angry, no matter what the truth is."

"S-Sanzo..." Gojyo glanced back to Sanzo, lost for words again, and he hung his head. "I'm sorry."

"Please stop saying that. You've nothing to apologize for." Sanzo lifted his hand, and Gojyo flinched. Sanzo chewed his lip- he looked hurt- and instead reached to caress Gojyo's cheek. "I won't hurt you. That would be wrong. I still ache for the times I did hurt you. I ache for all the hurt I know you've felt, because it has made you feel insecure- or worse- near me. All I ask is for you to let me a little closer. You trust me, don't you?" Gojyo felt like a small child as Sanzo came a step closer. His expression was now full of sorrow. "I suppose that's a silly question. I don't think I've given you a reason to, and I don't know how to. But if you did trust me, then you wouldn't have seen those images of me."

"Sanzo-" Gojyo tried to interrupt, tried to protest, but the sad smile crossing Sanzo's face told him any comfort he offered wouldn't be accepted. Sanzo sighed, and the sadness cleared from his face as he looked back into Gojyo's eyes and slid his hands around the small of his back.

"You think I hide our relationship because I'm ashamed. You are right and wrong at the same time. I don't want to subject you to ridicule. I know you were uncomfortable with admitting a relationship with a man, and I know I'm your only exception." Sanzo moved one hand to rest on Gojyo's shoulder. "And you're mine. I have never pretended to be interested in women as anything more than humans. Truth be told- and you probably knew this- I don't care much for people of any kind. For the most part, men and women are all the same to me. Friends are different. You're special. But... I'm uncomfortable with public displays of affection."

He lowered his head, suddenly looking shy. "I'm not really used to showing anyone affection at all. But if you really want, you can try. Something small, at first- touch my hand, or my shoulder. You can take my hand if you're scared- but then again, how often are you scared?" He smiled- he was laughing at himself! Gojyo couldn't even imagine that Sanzo could have ever made a face like that. "If we go slow, and if you're patient, I might be brave enough to kiss you in front of Hakkai by the time we get back from India." Sanzo looked up, looked him in the eye again, and slid his hand up to Gojyo's waist. "I want to hold you like this." Gojyo couldn't keep it bottled up anymore.

"Sanzo, why?" Sanzo frowned at this.

"Why what?"

"Why do you bother? Why do you want to?"

"Why do you mean anything to me at all." It wasn't a question. "Perhaps your greatest insecurity of all." Sanzo ran his hand through Gojyo's hair, smoothing his bangs back and tucking a stray strand behind his ear. The water was starting to creep from their knees up towards their chests. "That's not a question easily answered- it's hard to explain why I feel a certain way. There's no measurable quantification, no rubric by which to judge it, no logical reasoning that would be sufficient. I suppose..." Sanzo thought for a moment. "I suppose it's the way you make me feel. I feel good when we're together, I feel good when we're alone. I... I actually feel happy when you touch me. Perhaps I can't show it, but I do."

He slowly entangled himself around Gojyo, and Gojyo listened, dumbfounded. "But it's more than that. You have this strange aura about you; it's magnetic. It used to annoy me, how well you could fit in with anybody even if you didn't want to, but I don't think I'd have you any other way. There's something about you... those eyes, the way they look at night. The shape of your body against the moonlight. It's funny to say, but whenever I look at the shadows on the moon's surface, I only see your smile. It's the smell of you, too. You smell like cigarettes and spice, and it makes my hair stand on end. And you know what?" He tousled Gojyo's hair again, and Gojyo felt dizzy. "You're nice. You're friendly, you make others smile. I envy that. But you, just you, make me feel whole. You spur your passion in me. I didn't always like it, because I didn't know what to do with my feelings, but I do now. I may still be learning, but I am learning. You make me happy. That's why you're important to me." Sanzo gently pushed his hair back, leaning just a little closer to Gojyo. "Is that enough?"

Gojyo had no words. Instead, he felt his knees weaken, his heart start skipping beats. But Sanzo held him up, even as the water rose ever higher. After a minute of thought, he replied, "Does... does that mean...?"

"That's not for me to say." Sanzo rubbed his cheek to Gojyo's, his mouth beside his ear, and intoned gently, "But you know, don't you? You know the truth. Is it any comfort to know that I am here, that Sanzo has this sentiment?"

Gojyo didn't know when the water had gotten so deep, nor when he had waded deeper into the river. Sanzo still touched him, still stroked his back and caressed his cheek as the cool water rushed past his waist. A crisp, fresh wind caught his hair as it whistled past.

"I'm still scared," Gojyo answered after a long moment of thought. He felt smaller than a child. Sanzo embraced him fully, his damp chest pressed against his breast.

"Don't be. I told you; I'm here for you. And so I will remain. I won't ask you for any more answers, I won't push you any further. I know there are some things even I can't make better. For now, I'm only asking you to rest."

"I'm sorry." Gojyo felt his consciousness slipping away again. The world looked blurry; everything but Sanzo's smiling visage looked like it was underwater. "I'm sorry. I don't know. I'm sorry." He felt his body begin to sink again, to tumble forward, but Sanzo sank with him.

"Don't worry anymore. Rest calm, until you need rest no more." Sanzo's image faded from view, and Gojyo felt the water rise over his head. He heard one last echo of Sanzo's voice: "I, and all your answers, will await you when you rise."

The water covered him completely, and he was back in the blue void. Though he could feel the water, he could feel nothing else. Finally secure, his mind found solace. He knew it wouldn't last, but it was what he needed.

* * *

**End Notes: **If you really want to twist my arm, this chapter is probably my favorite. Well, okay, maybe this one or the next one- OW OW OW NOT THE ARM. Fine, this one is a close- VERY CLOSE- second.

And yes, I may have purchased the new Nightwish album shortly after I started writing the story, and this may be my favorite song off of it. (Crazy disappointed the lead vocalist left the group, though. Hope they find a new one soon.)

Next time, we follow Gojyo on his road to sanity back to the waking world! And I will say that he's not the only one on this road. But for now!

What did you think of this chapter? Did you finish the last chapter? Review!  
"Awwww dream-Sanzo is so cute with Gojyo!"? Review! "Sanzo would never act like that, even in his dreams!"? Review! "WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!" … Review!  
Love it? Hate it? Review!  
Questions? Comments? Suggestions? Demands for a sequel? Review!  
Anything? Review! Nothing? Review!

Until next week!


	22. Both Sides of the Heart

**King Rat, No Mercy**

**Author Notes:** After last week's little misadventure, we need something special. And this, ladies and gentlemen, is probably the best part of the story.

**Disclaimer:** Still not mine. By the by, "Both Sides" is my shorthand in this story for a perspective switch.

"_I don't want the world; I just want your half."_ - "Ana Ng," They Might Be Giants

* * *

**20A: Your Side of My Heart**

(**Suggested Track:** "Little Black Submarines," The Black Keys. Album version please, the radio edit cuts a whole verse and 1/3 of the interlude.)

The sun no longer screamed as Gojyo gazed up at it, but coming from the darkness of his eyelids to the light blinded him. He felt something warm and wet being pulled away from his head, then something cool, smooth, and dry placed across it. He heard Sanzo muttering, "His fever's broken. His forehead feels cool."

"Hey, his eyes are open again. Is he awake?" Goku's voice asked from nearby. Gojyo shifted his jaw, and groped around in his head for a response.

"A little," he managed to quietly utter.

"Oh, is he intelligible this time?" Hakkai's voice was as carefree as usual, but it lacked its usual syncopation.

"What'cha mean?" Gojyo blinked a few times, lifting his hand to shade his eyes.

"You were kinda screwed up for, like, two days," Goku replied, sounding unusually serious. "You just kept saying 'I'm sorry.'"

"Really? Man, I'm sorry-" The other three groaned, but he quickly added, "I mean I'm sorry you had to put up with that! Shit," he sighed. "Why didn't you just put me down like a rabid dog if I was that annoying?"

"Oh, we wouldn't do that," Hakkai replied. He laughed softly, half-heartedly, and was silent. Gojyo's eyesight was finally adjusting to the light. He could see Hakkai driving, as he expected him to be, Goku in the front seat, and realized his head was on Sanzo's shoulder. He sat up slowly, feeling all the liquid in his head slosh around as he did, and let his head fall onto the other side of the car. "Ah, be careful; you're probably going to be a bit off balance."

"You're telling me now?" Gojyo chuckled, and shifted one shaking hand down to his flat stomach. Something came back to him. "Hey, this might be a weird question, but-" He felt all three of them brace themselves, the atmosphere stiff. "Uh... I wanna know what happened. I only remember a little, I wanna know the rest."

His companions were silent. Gojyo heard the engine rev as Hakkai put the accelerator down to the floor. Sanzo pinched the bridge of his nose. The crew was silent for a long moment, until Goku leaned over to Hakkai and gently tugged his sleeve. "I gotta pee," he mumbled.

"Right now?" Hakkai frowned.

"Yes, now. So bad. Please." His tone did not match the urgency of his words. Hakkai still downshifted and pulled the Jeep to a stop. He put the brake on about twelve meters from a tree.

"I'll escort him. Never know who's out there," Hakkai remarked, and he and Goku jumped out of the car.

"Actually, I should probably go too." Gojyo reached for the door, but Sanzo stayed his hand.

"You can wait until they return," he muttered. Gojyo understood- they were leaving the two of them alone.

"Yeah, I guess. You drew the short straw, huh?" Sanzo didn't reply, but instead fixed a glare on the seat-back in front of him. He pulled a cigarette from his pocket and a full box for Gojyo.

"Yours were dirty. I threw them out."

"Thanks. You got Hi-Lites, too- glad you remembered." He pulled one out, and Sanzo held out his silver lighter.

"We found this in the wreckage of the seal's release, along with your jacket." Gojyo took the lighter and lit it, surprised it still worked. He stopped, when he realized what Sanzo was doing.

"Look, I'm a grown-ass man. I don't care how bad it was, just tell me what happened to me." He pocketed the lighter and put the cigarettes away. "No more stallin'."

"I will not be repeating myself," Sanzo grumbled. "Shut up and listen." Gojyo made a motion as though to zip his lips, and Sanzo lowered his eyes. "The... ordeal lasted perhaps thirty minutes from start to end. You spent most of it in severe pain and delirium." He closed his eyes, clearly searching for words. "You... produced... nothing cohesive. What little there was crumbled to dust. If it had nerves, they were too disconnected to transmit pain. If any of it was alive, it did not live long. It's gone now."

"Ryuji... Gone." Gojyo swallowed hard- it had confirmed all he'd thought had happened. "I understand." Sanzo wouldn't make eye contact, but Gojyo focused on his hands folded over his stomach. "Didn't... didn't it have a heartbeat?" Sanzo did not respond, instead gripping his knees. "I guess... if it didn't live long..."

"I could have lied and told you it was all nothing but a nightmare," Sanzo murmured flatly. "Goku suggested as much. Hakkai suggested comfort and reassurance, but I'm sure you would find no solace in it." Sanzo lit his cigarette and took a few short puffs. "I offer you only the truth- that you did nothing wrong. If nothing else, you carried him somewhere that King could not control him."

"Y-yeah," Gojyo mumbled. "You're right." He leaned his head against the shoulder of Hakkai's seat. "Thanks."

"You don't sound thankful," Sanzo grumbled. Gojyo shrugged.

"Still tired. Still sore." He glanced around. "Where the hell are we, anyway?"

"By all accounts, three days from the India border. Hakkai has not stopped driving for two days except for twenty minutes in the market, functional breaks and one hot meal. With any luck, he will see fit to stop and sleep tonight."

"Guess I made you guys worry." Gojyo rubbed his forehead on the seat. "Sorry about that."

"Shut up." Gojyo did not hear anger in this order. Sanzo stubbed out his cigarette and promptly lit another one. "Don't apologize. You did nothing wrong."

"I lost our sons," Gojyo muttered. Sanzo turned away, as Gojyo pulled out his cigarette box and lit one up. "Even if it wasn't my fault- and I ain't convinced of that- those kids were our boys. You figured that out, right?" Sanzo said nothing. Gojyo sucked the tip of his cigarette, the taste of tar rolling off his tongue. He laughed softly. "That Goddess... she lied to me. She said they'd be safe, but she didn't protect them there. They're dead. I watched them turn to dust. Nothing but fucking dust." He punched the wall of the car, and Hakuryu whined. "Ah, sorry, Jeep." He curled his arm on the seat and rested his eyes on it, seeming to forget his cigarette.

"I have nothing to offer you for that." Sanzo turned his head away. "Only that you never meant them harm." His voice was completely untelling. "But at least they are no longer trapped."

"Yeah," Gojyo sighed. "I... I guess I fucked up. I should have waited to bring 'em both back, wrung the kid's neck and stuffed him back into me. Maybe if they were together, they would have survived. You can't separate twins, it ain't right."

"Hmph..." Sanzo grunted, and turned back toward Gojyo. "I am at fault too. I am not asking forgiveness, but know that I acknowledge it."

"What?" Gojyo tipped his head up, raised one eyebrow. "What could you have possibly done?" Sanzo met his scrutiny with a calm, blank expression and an even tone.

"I broke my word. I said I would not let go of you- my hand slipped. It was an accident." Sanzo lowered his eyes again. Gojyo gripped his fingers around the seat, his fingernails digging into the upholstery. He could vaguely remember Sanzo saying something like that, but he couldn't remember when.

"I ain't mad at you, if that's what you thought. Ain't your fault, you never asked for this either." He didn't know what else to say, but instead slowly turned to face him. "We've changed, haven't we?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, we ain't the same assholes we were when we left home. You don't have to admit it, but you aren't as cold as you were. And me?" He dropped his long-extinguished cigarette out of the car. "I was someone's dad for a few days there." He bowed his head. "Thank you." It was Sanzo's turn to raise his brow, and Gojyo knew he was expecting an explanation. "Well, you made me a father. Two to tango, and all. And in spite of everything, those boys made me happy. So, thanks." He rubbed his eyes- when had he started to cry?- but Sanzo quickly turned in his seat.

"Stop looking at me like that," he grumbled. Gojyo felt a twinge of pain pull his heartstrings, but Sanzo quietly added, "It makes me feel like an ass when you look like that." Gojyo nearly jumped when Sanzo put a hand on his knee. "You'll be okay in the end. You always are. Have faith. Would the goddess really abuse you so?"

"You know..." Gojyo put his head down again. "I think she would." He laughed softly, as Sanzo pulled away from him again. He glanced over the edge of his arm, finally meeting Sanzo's eyes again. He wondered how deep the illusion he'd seen of Sanzo was, he wanted to ask. But he couldn't.

He could only remember that it was an illusion. Not Sanzo. Not his friends. Another illusion.

Instead, he withdrew himself into his seat, pressed himself against the cushion, and covered his eyes with one hand. "Just... just try and ignore me. I'm going to try and forget what my kids looked like." Sanzo was silent for a moment, and dug into the folds of his robe.

"Don't forget them. Remember. They're still important." He pulled out the photograph, and held it out to Gojyo. Gojyo briefly pulled his eyes up from his wet sleeve, and laughed again, this time bitterly, angrily.

"Don't do this to me." He swatted the photograph away, out of Sanzo's hands. Sanzo instinctively jumped out of the car as it landed on the ground. He stopped himself for a moment as he went to pick it up, but completed the motion and tucked it away. Gojyo buried his face in his sleeve again. "My kids... I'd rather drown than ever feel like this again."

* * *

**20B: Both Sides of the Heart**

**(Suggested Track: "The Crow, the Owl, and the Dove,"** **Nightwish)**

… And that was all there was. I couldn't say another word, and he completely shut down after that. My only photograph of our sons sits in my hand, wrinkled and creased, but still clear to my eyes. I could have thrown it aside, tore it to bits and scattered it to the wind, as I will gain nothing by keeping it, but there is something in me that compels me to keep it and keep it close, so I put it away again, hoping that perhaps it will act as either bandage or tourniquet. Our companions soon returned, after Goku finished what I'm certain was the longest fake bathroom break in known history. I reclaimed the front seat, and we were on our way once more.

He didn't talk to me for a day and a half.

This is not to say he did not talk. He did, with increasing frequency as the days wore on. The first thing he said was a polite request to stay the night with Goku if we did reach an inn. None of the rest of us could even fathom this. It took a few leaps and bounds of logic, but after some quick, discreet discussion while the two less mature members of our party took another bathroom break, Hakkai and I determined that he did not want to be alone, nor did he want to be left alone with either of us.

"He said his illusions of me were that I turned traitor on him," Hakkai reminded me as we waited for the two of them to return from the copse by which we were stopped. "Perhaps he cannot push it from his mind, no matter how hard he tries." I hold my tongue, but wonder if he is even trying at all.

There was no inn to be had that night, so instead, we set up two little camps on either side of a fire. I cannot help but be somewhat wary of alcoholic moths, though I know we're planes away from the place where such things did exist. Hakkai seems to understand, and reassures me that it will be snuffed before we sleep. Gojyo is fortunate- though some of our food spoiled while we were trapped in the other world, Hakkai did stop in the town past the mountain base long enough to restock our supplies, and as such, Hakkai is able to give him his first decent meal in a week. And he does eat- he is clearly ravenous, as all of us were after our imposed but unfelt starvation caught up with us- but he eats slowly, reticent at every bite. I can tell how hard he's straining to hold back his desire to shovel it down like the pig he normally is, as he's become too used to trying to get his portion down before Goku does, but he only finishes half of his ration and shoves the rest to Goku. Goku, however, knows better.

"Nah, I had mine." He forces a nervous grin and waves his hands in front of his chest. "All full up, not hungry at all, no sir! You should eat. You need to build yourself back up, you look kinda flabby!"

Goku nursed his black eye as Gojyo forced down the rest of his meal. He's right, of course- your muscles have atrophied, your body is drained. Are you so traumatized that you can no longer love yourself?

Perhaps that's a silly question.

Hakkai and I lay on one side of the snuffed fire. Gojyo and Goku are on the other, both snoring. I can't imagine how he could be tired; hasn't he slept for two days? But I won't begrudge it of him. Perhaps he still feels unwell. I can't sleep, but neither can Hakkai.

"You know, you make it very hard for me to justify being your friend sometimes. What you've done to him is appalling." I'm silent. I knew I had this coming. He's waiting for me to say something. Anything.

"Please reiterate my monstrosity."

"Monstrosity? Don't be so melodramatic." Hakkai sighs. "You're only human. Only a man could do what you've done. He built his worldview around a strata of abandonment and trust issues and a desperate desire for positive attention... and then you slept with him." I hold my tongue- I know not to interrupt. "Not out of the affection he needs, the affection he openly craved from easy, loose women, but to shut him up. And whether or not you felt anything for him, or whether you do now, he knew it was all pretend. But it felt real, no doubt. That, perhaps, is your worst crime."

I shut my eyes to try and block out the rest of the world, focusing only on Hakkai's reprimand and letting it sting. "The way you pushed back against him when he needed support most, and just how hard and hatefully you did so? Despicable, but forgivable under the circumstances. But letting him believe your little game was real, or letting him believe your relationship was ploy? That's a new low. You may have been better off under that rancid contract, since with that, he at least knew the rules. In that, perhaps you are a monster." He's quiet for a moment. I can say nothing. "You are perhaps no better than a King of Rats. You deceived him, whether you intended to or not, out of sheer inaction. You are nothing but mortar for the wall he's been trying hard not to build around himself. Between the torture actively wrought by a manlike monster and that which you have passively inflicted for over a year... Look at where that's gotten us."

I fold my arms tight around my chest. "And what should I do?"

"You're asking me? I'm not the one you have to talk to."

In spite of my plea, I have no defense for my actions. Perhaps my judge will be less harsh were I to plead insanity, but he rolls over, his chest now unburdened, and rests his eyes. And I am left alone, the stars staring at me and guilt again tearing into me like so many rabid wolves. Someday, I will cease to deserve this repeated evisceration, and until such a day, I will not complain. I owe you at least that much, Gojyo.

He did start to get better after a night's sleep. He ate more willingly, he started to talk more. He even began to speak to Hakkai directly, and I heard him muttering an apology to him first thing in the morning:

"Look, man, I know it wasn't you, and I'm wrong to take it out on you. It was wrong of me to say that shit to you, or to push you away when you're just trying to be nice. That bastard, he screwed my head around. But I know you'd never do that, it's just-"

"He presented irrefutable evidence." Hakkai finished his sentence. "No, he nearly fooled me with his illusion of you as well. I'm not angry, see?" He points at the perennially-upturned corners of his mouth. "Does this face look angry?"

"Thanks." Gojyo hugged him, and Hakkai returned his embrace in kind. It seems he's finally letting his mind clear, letting the truth filter back in around the murky vestiges of his tragedy, and thank the Merciful Goddess for that. Part of me wants him to come to me next, to dare try and apologize again, just so I can shake it into him that he's done nothing wrong. But he instead walks right past me, too afraid to look me in the eye. I remember the other part of me- the part that is willing to be patient.

I mulled things over in my mind most of the day. I'd read all the back issues of the newspaper that I'd missed, and even finished all of the crossword puzzles, so I had little better to do, and besides that, it was important that I do something about his fear. If I wait too long for him to make a move- as I possibly already have- then the window will close. Worse, he may not move at all, he may be content to let things hang as they are. Or perhaps content is not the word. I try again and again to think of the best approach, but nothing comes to me.

He's becoming ever more garrulous, he's broken out his hand weights, he's doing push-ups during rest stops. He and Goku even briefly wrestle over the last snack, almost like old times, except Gojyo gives up way too quickly and Goku somberly splits his manjuu into two pieces and gives Gojyo the smaller side. But though he's recovering, I have made no progress. I finally decide to try not to worry about it, to let things come as they will. They always seem to, don't they?

That second night, we reached a trade town a few hours after sundown and found an inn with a bustling tavern. Two rooms available. At this point, I've started to think that this situation occurs so frequently that the Aspects themselves contrived it with hopes of seeing what trouble we get into night after night out of hope of deriving some entertainment from it. (In spite of these thoughts, I readily recognize that even if there were more rooms, at this distance from India we're not safe alone, and much safer in pairs. We'd be playing these silly games even if there were a better option.) Hakkai asks Gojyo if he has a preference, and he shrugs.

Oh kind contrivance, you've given me my opening.

Hakkai takes out the deck of cards, and we take four seats around the table as always, myself across from Goku, Gojyo to my left, Hakkai to my right. Hakkai shuffles first, as Gojyo fidgets under the table. The rhythmic taps and clacks of his shuffling techniques are impressive, really. One could make music to it, were he so inclined, but I am not. Hakkai deals five cards to each of us, and I have to wonder why we even bother with this first round. We all know who will take it.

"Four kings," Hakkai announced proudly. Goku groaned and reached for his sleeve, but Hakkai rolls them both back to show that they're as empty as they always are. Anything we have is paltry by comparison, so we shuffle, cut, and deal again, five cards apiece. My hand of three nines is impressive enough, but I know that if asked, I will bluff.

"Two pair, eights and threes." Goku holds his hand out.

"Two pair, tens and jacks." Gojyo smirks and shows his for comparison.

"Three nines. The room is yours." I toss the cards back to the center. I realize I spoke in error, but I know you are the only you that has occupied my mind lately. I steal a glance. I know what I'm expected to do. I'm supposed to win this round and take the preferred option of rooming with Hakkai with the intentions of getting some peace and quiet. Fuck that.

"Would you like to do it?" Hakkai offers the deck to Gojyo. Gojyo smirks and takes it. His fingers are fast, his wrists sharp as he flicks six cards apiece at Goku and myself. He doesn't have the same rhythm as Hakkai, but he has unmatched speed and flair. The cards are hot when I pick them up, or perhaps that's in my mind or in my over-warm palms. Goku holds out his hand.

"I got a pair of tens. You?"

I look at the pair of jacks in my hand. Then, I pitch them aside. "Fuck all." I get up and pick the cards up before Goku can, then take his from the table. I hold the cards out to Gojyo, daring him to call my bluff.

But you don't. "Shit luck tonight." He grins at me. I turn and face Goku. I can't answer you. I'm not that good of a liar.

"Goku, who would you prefer to room with?" Hakkai asks. Goku looks between the two of them, and momentarily at me. Sometimes, he is much smarter than I give him credit for.

"I wanna go to Hakkai's room!" He beams. With that, I turn away.

"Give me the key. I'm tired."

"Nah, I'll go with you," Gojyo offers, and he gets up. He takes up his pack and starts for the stairs. "Look at me, goin' to bed early like an old man," he chuckles to himself. I pause just long enough to set my hand on Goku's head.

"Good monkey." I follow Gojyo. Goku looks confused, but even if he doesn't know, I do. I'm more thankful than I'll ever be able to express.

He unlocks the door, he pitches his pack at the wall, throws himself onto the bed, sighs deeply. I shut the door behind us, take up the newspaper from the bedside table, and collapse into the armchair next to the window. It's a nice change from the Jeep's seat, though I'd never disrespect Hakuryu by complaining, and surely Gojyo is enjoying a comfortable bed with no strings attached. And here, I find myself in the same conundrum I'd been pondering during the day. He doesn't have anything to say to me, and I am not the type to start difficult conversations. I'm an expert at finishing them, or at least I thought I was until fairly recently (when I realized that Hakkai has a leg up on me when it comes to my own personal life), but I have never had to start them.

Finally, he mutters, "Give me a minute," and gets to his feet. He shuffles to the bathroom door, but seems to hang expectantly in the door frame, as though waiting for something. All the world like some puppy, waiting to be walked- what do you want from me? I'm not your master, nor can I read your mind. Tell me your thoughts, damn you. He shuts the door when I don't move, and I hear the shower turn on. He must still feel dirty.

Hakkai had washed his body after we destroyed all the evidence of the bastard King's crimes. He had been soaked in blood, his clothes were foul, his sweat rancid on his skin. Fortunately, he had spare clothes, as Hakkai burned the ones he'd been wearing. They were ruined anyway. (I was thankful his favorite jacket had been spared this fate; since we found it a half-kilometer away from the seal in a tree, with only a little dust on it, it seemed safe to keep.) He'd been so filthy that the grime running off of him turned the water Hakkai poured onto him a deep brown-red. Like rust. Though his body was clean after some work, his face- god, his face.

The first few hours he'd been unconscious, he wore a mask like he'd been punched in the gut. Mouth open, eyes open wide, blank and pained. I wished I could have covered it, but Hakkai said no, to let him breathe. That face, that expression, disgusted me more than all the dirt on his body. But I think what was in his head was even worse.

Before rousing, he woke twice, only briefly. The first time, he gasped like a fish with no water, then screamed. He did not stop screaming. Hakkai downshifted so fast Goku's head nearly hit the windshield, threw the Jeep into park and knocked him out again. The second time his eyes opened, he started muttering, "I'm sorry," over and over with increasing volume until Hakkai pulled the Jeep over again and put him back into dreams. Oh, how that hurt. Knowing his mind was so far beyond reason? Knowing there was nothing I could do for him? That ached.

And yet I sat by him those two long days, knowing his hurt was far greater than mine. I forced water into his mouth, I kept cool compresses on his burning forehead, I tried to put food in him. This was, in fact, the hardest task- he began to hyperventilate in his sleep every time I forced his mouth open, and though he didn't wake or complain, the guilt I felt from the look in his eyes was nigh unbearable. Hakkai tried to help, and he managed to course out the infection caused by the rotten body he'd carried inside him, but I insisted he let me do the rest. It was my responsibility, after all. I owed him this much, and much more. Even if he wasn't truly in his own body, even if his soul was light-years away, I'd have stayed beside him and waited for him to return to me.

And even within five meters of me, with his head and body back on this side of the universe, he's distant. He's behind that door but might as well be on the other side of the planet, and it has never been more obvious. I can't concentrate on the newspaper. I rise and let my body drift towards the bathroom door, I lean against it. I can smell the water on his body. Soap, too. More than usual. I vaguely realize that he expected me to follow him into the shower, and can't help but wonder if he's disappointed. No, perish the thought. I know better than that. I know you know too, Gojyo. You can't think that's the only reason I wanted to be alone with you.

I hear the water turn off and return to the chair. A minute later, he emerges, hair dripping, naked body steaming. I do appreciate the smell of soap radiating from him, though I hate the reason it's there. He has a towel wrapped around his waist, though I'm not sure why he bothered. I've seen what's under there, at angles none could be proud of. Modesty I never knew he had? Doubtful. He folds the bed's sheet back and sits cross-legged near the bottom of the bed. His gaze turns to me cautiously a few times, as he reaches for his pack, digs his brush out, and starts combing his hair out. I don't like that look on his face- I feel like he's waiting for me to hit him.

Then, he does it. He puts his brush aside, sits upright, puts his hands on his knees, looks right at me and says, "Well, whenever you're ready."

No.

That unimpressed, sad look in his eyes, that body language, they all but scream, "Let's just get this over with." No.

No. No. No. No, no, no. No. No. NO!

"Is that how low your opinion of me is?" I can't hide my anger. I throw the newspaper aside, I'm on my feet in an instant. "Is that what you thought I wanted?" I march to the bedside, my hands almost acting on their own, but before they can shove him from his knees to his back, I stop myself and force them back to my sides. I want to hit him now, just to put some sense into him, but a nagging voice in my head reminds me: What good will that accomplish? Look at his eyes, he's already terrified. I control my tongue, I stiffen my back to keep myself from moving. "What did I do to you?"

Those wide, pitiful eyes. That gruff, dull voice. "Sanzo?"

"No. Tell me what I did. I want to know what that bastard did with my face and voice." I unlock my knees, I reach down to throw his clothes at him, and drop onto the bed beside him. He's silent, bewildered, and I know I must make myself clear: "I have come to accept that the lion's share of the anguish of your ordeal is my fault. I want to know what I did. Tell me what happened to you." The next word hurts my teeth to say, but I must. "Please."

He's horrified, isn't he? His dejected face, his slumped shoulders. He can't look at me directly anymore- I broke the blinders that let him pretend otherwise. He draws himself in, curling himself up, and takes a slow, calming breath. "Guess it's only fair," he mutters. He takes his boxers and yanks them on, and begins.

**(Suggested Track: "Never Let Me Go," Florence and the Machine)**

He slowly recounts the strange tale. His voice rises and falls as he tries hard to hold back his emotions, trying to suppress the shame at being drunk under the table by someone deliberately trying to knock him out. He mentions that the King had threatened his sons from the start, the piece of paper forced down his throat, how Ryuji had started to become ill as soon as they met and before they'd exchanged names. He tries to recount some of the conversations he'd had with Ryuji, but his eyes flood with tears and he stops. I pass him a tissue, he dries his eyes and continues, skipping to his first experience in the interrogation room. How cruel I was. How I smirked and taunted him. And yet, he knew it was an illusion, at least he was almost sure. Ryuji had reminded him-

"Tell me about Ryuji." He looks back up to me in shock at this request. Finally, he has looked at my face again.

"As his soul was getting sucked into me, I started seeing his memories, walking through them. I lived the kid's life." He somberly recalls the parts he remembered best: his miserable childhood, his journey to Heaven, the man who loved them there, and the mistake that separated them. Gojyo wipes his eyes again. "And between those nightmares, you kept coming back to torture me."

He's finally unearthed the willpower to tell me about the rest of the "interrogations." He insists that even when he saw Goku dead and Hakkai abandon him- and believed- he could remember that it was not really me. He was convinced by the other two- he'd smelled Goku's blood, he knew Hakkai's angriest voice- but he kept me separate. (I had my own theory to this- he was physically closest to Hakkai, they had spent the most time together, his memories of him would be easier for the King to read and manipulate. As for Goku, Gojyo does have a soft spot for children, and the shock of it combined with his fears for our safety would have been enough to convince him. Why he could keep me separate, I can't imagine. Perhaps he could smell the rat, as it was.) But he continues, curls himself up tighter as he confesses more and more.

"He touched me. I was starving, so I let him touch me in exchange for sustenance." His face contorts; he's disgusted with himself. "He... he actually touched my stomach. He rubbed it and shit, like he liked seeing me that way. Somewhere in my contorted skull, it felt good, but the rest of me just wanted to hurl. And I hate the part of me that liked it." He slowly shakes his head. "But I put it all together: he loved me. In his sick way, he loved me, or he envied me and thought it was love. I knew he wanted to be loved, too. And I tried to weaponize that, I tried to spit it back at him. I tried to tell him, you don't love me, not really, and I'll never love you. You might as well stop wasting your time and turn me loose." His fists are clenched in his lap, and he can't look at me anymore. "That's when I forgot it wasn't you. He lit a cigarette that smelled like yours, and I forgot it wasn't you."

Every abusive word I used on him spills from his lips. Every sick insult, every belittling snarl, all that hatred came into the light. He remembers every exact word, each of his futile replies, as if they were burned onto his frontal lobe. "I tried to tell you, I don't want this for us. I want you to love me. I want to love you." He pauses, mortified by what he's admitted. "But... you just... pushed back harder. You held my face and stared me down and said you'd fuck me rotten. You said you'd rape me 'til I understood. And I never will."

He's silent. He can't say anymore. I can't blame him.

"But... look at me." He smiles in self-deprecation. "I... I know better, don't I?" I can't speak, my lips drawn tight, my throat seizing. My stomach and heart have dropped down through my ribcage and hang at my feet, and I'm certain that if I open my mouth now they will explode back up through my chest. "Don't mind me. Guess I'm just in a funk 'cause... 'cause my kids are dead, and all. Hah," he scoffs, and stares at his naked toes. "Sad: when I think about it, I can hardly call them mine. I... I barely even knew 'em."

"They're..." My id speaks before my ego can control it. "They're our sons." He looks at me, surprised, and that sad smile is suddenly sympathetic.

"What a selfish jerk I've been. So wrapped up in me, I forgot that you're probably down too. How have you been holding up?"

Damn you and your self-loathing and self-pity, don't try and spread that to me! I don't want your pity- no, that's not fair. Don't start crying now. "Ah, I'm sorry, I'm a mess. I just can't keep my head on right." He rubs at his eyes again, laughing at himself, but this time the tears don't dry. I understand, you hate to appear weak in front of me, but that's wrong. Your emotions, your tears, are not a sign of weakness. That you are strong enough to let it show is so much more admirable.

It's a power I lack. And by the gods, do I wish I had it. I can't cry my anxieties out. They will eat my heart instead, if not today, then tomorrow or tomorrow or tomorrow. And I must live with that.

I can't help it. I fall against him and let my hands land on the small of his back. There are a thousand things I want to say that I lack the strength to verbalize, thoughts my heart screamed at his unconscious form while he slept. That I'm sorry. That it's my fault. That I'm not angry with him, not over this, that I never was. That I want our sons back, that I'd do anything for that. That I left my worn-out sandals by the last statue of Kanzeon Bosatsu we passed and prayed sincerely for the first time in ages. That I'd shave my head and cut off my arms and break my knees and slit my own throat and let myself drown in the deep water I've dragged the both of us into if it would give them life again. That I'd even carry them myself if that would solve it. The unthinkable beyond that. But I can't. I can't even say it.

"It's okay, right?" He rests his chin on my shoulder, accepting my embrace. "I... I understand." But his body is stiff against mine, and I release him.

"I would never hurt you." I pull away from him, my breast already cold for lacking him. "And if I must never touch you again to prove that, so be it." I push myself from the bed to gather the paper up and return to the chair and my solitude, but he reaches out to me.

"Hey." His eyes are wide, his jaw slack with shock. "Don't go."

And I can't refuse you. I sit down beside him again, and open my right hand to him. He rests his left palm in it, and we hold tight. He's starting to shake, the tears start coming, but he won't let go of my hand. I squeeze his hand in return, and he starts to weep openly.

I can taste your loss as well, because it's my loss too. And yet, here we are, alone in the universe, bereft of our usual veil of smoke, alone with our thoughts and emotions, and still we have nothing to say. You can only cry, and I can only wish that I could. But until the second you release me, I will not let go.

Please don't let go.

* * *

"I really don't know what 'I love you' means. I think it means 'Don't leave me here alone.'" — Neil Gaiman

**End Notes:** Mnf. So much cute. Gonna throw up.

Why yes, I was building up to the "Never Let Me Go" scene every time Sanzo repeated or remembered that phrase. And I might have had trouble editing this chapter just because I was enjoying re-reading it.

Also, I've mentioned it quite a few times at this point, so I probably should explain: Kanzeon Bosatsu, or Guanyin, is also a goddess of fertility. One Chinese folk belief is that a woman wishing to have a child should offer a shoe by a shrine to her. It's on Wikipedia, but I figured I'd put it here so you wouldn't have to go hunting across the interwebs to get what I'm going for. I have spent more time doing research for this story than you guys can even imagine. I took notes. And I'm probably still wrong about everything.

So, we have come to the end. Next chapter is the finale. I can't believe we've gotten all the way here. It's been quite a ride, and with any luck, I should be able to tie everything up next week. But if you have any burning questions that you think I might miss, now's your chance to share!

So, enjoyed? Did not enjoy? Review!  
Questions? Comments? Suggestions? Review!  
Anything you want to be sure I include next week? Review!  
Anything? Review! Nothing? Review anyway!

Until next week!


	23. Union

**King Rat, No Mercy**

**Author's Notes: **Merry Christmas, everyone!

I'm almost reluctant to do this. I don't want this story to be over. But it has drawn to its conclusion, and I would be remiss in holding it over your heads. Thank you all for reading this far. I'm glad you stuck with me and our heroes through this sordid and twisted little tale.

Review responses!

RodiSquall- (I know it's you, the guest tag can't hide it!) The way I see it, the whole story has been building up to the last half of the chapter and this conclusion. And I can't help but enjoy telling the story from Sanzo's point of view. Sanzo's inner character is coated in a thick, THICK layer of ice, and he gives away very little of what he's got under the surface, when we all know there has to be something there. That might be the fangirl in me desperately wanting there to be more to him, or just my interpretation of the character. Either way, thank you so much for your readership! I hope I answer all your questions here.

D-Chan- I'm sorry if the first half was boring. However, I needed to build up for the perspective switch. Kind of like the first chapter was a little boring- it was setting up. But Sanzo and Gojyo finally coming clean with each other? Worth it. I hope that this chapter satisfies, and thank you for reading!

For all my other readers and reviewers- thanks for reading! I love you all.

**Disclaimer: **If you don't know what's not mine by now, then I don't know what to tell you. They aren't, and never will be. As for what is mine? Still not profiting off of them.

* * *

**21: Union**

**(Suggested Track: "People as Places as People," Modest Mouse)**

Dawn was peaceful, punctuated by the cries of roosters and the soft rumble of the town beginning its business for the day. However, Hakkai's morning was interrupted by a jolt to his heart. He sat upright in bed and quickly surveyed the room. Goku asleep, wrapped in a blanket on the floor, pink-yellow sunlight trickling in around the closed curtains. Exactly as it should be, but there was something else that he couldn't see. He went to the window and threw the curtain open, and saw the source of his racing heart- a familiar, shiny presence that he'd written off as lost.

Hakkai swiftly pitched his pillow at Goku's head as he leaped across the room. "Goku, get up, get dressed!" He instructed excitedly, and he quickly threw his shirt on and dashed into the hallway. His feet slid on the floor as he rushed to the neighboring door and knocked. After a minute, Sanzo, stripped to his undershirt and pants, opened the door a crack and glared out.

"This had better be good."

"It is. It really is. Come on, put your clothes on, we mustn't keep them waiting!" Hakkai beamed, and Sanzo's brow creased.

"Them?" He turned back into the darkened room and began to put himself together, and Hakkai followed him in. Gojyo was crumpled in the fetal position at the bottom of the bed, still asleep.

"Gojyo, wake up!" Hakkai opened the curtains, and Gojyo jumped as the light touched him.

"The hell, man?" He grunted. Hakkai pointed out the window, and Gojyo staggered to his feet and peered out. His eyes widened- he was awake now. "Fuck!" He grabbed his shirt, jacket, and pants and shoved them all on, but didn't bother with socks or shoes as he darted out of the room. Sanzo was only a few steps behind him, still pulling his robe shut and haphazardly arranging his sutra over his shoulders. Hakkai dragged a half-asleep Goku behind him after locking the doors, as Gojyo and Sanzo had completely forgotten. In the grand scheme of things, keeping their things from being stolen was a miniscule concern. All they cared about were the two figures in white standing in the middle of the empty street.

They faced each other, holding their respective weapons- a long staff and a heavy-looking glaive- crossed as if to block their path. They wore polished helmets and pristine, new breeches and tunics emblazoned with an insignia that Gojyo recognized as that of the army of Heaven. As Gojyo slowed to a halt a few meters away from them, he could see that one was a few centimeters shorter than the other, both about half a meter shorter than him, but both were healthy for their size, lean, with solid muscles on their arms and legs. He slowly edged closer, almost afraid they would vanish if he spooked them. He took a few deep breaths, trying not to let himself get too excited.

"Can we help you?" He asked, letting a cheeky grin show. The two heralds glanced at him, at his three comrades gathering at his side, then back at each other.

"The General was right," said the taller one, his voice betraying a wide smile. Gojyo's heart soared.

"Yeah, we can't recognize the North Star without his friends," the second answered, and he giggled. Both boys removed their helmets and dropped their weapons. Aka and Ryuji, perfectly healthy, clear-eyed, and appearing at the age of ten, stood before them.

"You're alive!" Goku exclaimed. Gojyo rushed for Ryuji and hugged onto him.

"Kid, I'm sorry-"

"Don't apologize, it wasn't your fault!" Ryuji hugged him in turn, and briefly rested his nose on his breast. "And in the interest of full disclosure, we're not alive."

"Wh-what?" Gojyo backed away from him.

"Yeah, no." Aka rubbed the back of his head. "But... we're also not dead."

"See, the thing is, we did die. But since the Goddess took some of our spirits to Heaven in advance, we went right back to Heaven to get fixed up. It was kind of like she had tied strings to us, and just drew the rest of us back in so we wouldn't get lost in the rush," Ryuji explained with a grin and he mimicked a marionette with one hand. He folded one hand over his chest. "These bodies couldn't stay in the lower realm, so they decided to reincarnate us." He tossed his head towards his brother. "'Cept since Aka was kind of a dummy-"

"How many times am I gonna have to apologize?" Aka mumbled, rolling his eyes.

"Five thousand." Ryuji still beamed, ignoring his brother's scoff. "Anyway, since Aka was an idiot, they wanted to reincarnate him as something lower, like a youkai or even an animal. Me, they wanted to make a god." He waved a dismissive hand beside his head. "Something something, died in line of duty, something something, martyrdom, I was still kind of stunned from everything else that had happened, I missed most of the argument. But Kanzeon Bosatsu stepped to our defense, and said she'd already slated for us to be reincarnated into the lower world, that she had everything picked out for us- new bodies, new parents, everything." He grinned. "She's a sneaky one when she's got a plan."

"They still wanted to punish me." Aka hung his head, cheeks pink with embarrassment. "But Kanzeon Bosatsu said I was a good kid before all that happened, she'd just make me a hanyou again, and wouldn't that show me?" He grinned, teeth showing, wide and childish. "She said she'd make the necessary arrangements, and until then, she'd mind us. So, until we can be brought back, we're her personal bodyguards!" He chuckled again. "We have tea with her every afternoon, and she said she'll give us cake with our tea if we want it!"

"We don't take it, though," Ryuji added. "Cake is only for special occasions."

"What about your general?" Goku asked. "Why don't you stay with him?" At this, both boys hung their heads.

"The General... the Field Marshal... even Lord Konzen..." Aka sighed. Goku's ears perked up.

"I feel like I know that name," Goku murmured to himself, but Hakkai shushed him.

"Everyone we knew in Heaven is gone," Ryuji explained, and a knowing smile crossed his cheeks. "On to new lives, I suppose. We'll still miss them, but I'm sure we'll find them out here someday." He turned his gaze to Gojyo with a sly smirk. "As long as it's okay with you, Dad."

"So, you know now." Gojyo folded his arms and smirked right back at him. "Why I couldn't tell you my kids' names are Yohei and Eiji."

"No lie, that would have freaked me right the hell out!" Ryuji laughed sharply, and Gojyo couldn't help but laugh. Swearing sounded too awkward coming from him, even though he was clearly trying to be familiar.

"I figured it out when Lord Sanzo showed me that picture. I did kind of freak out," Aka giggled nervously. He looked down at his feet. "Kanzeon Bosatsu had to fix my head back on by force. She... she wiped out most of it, so that I still have the memories but I look at it like it happened to someone else, and she forced me to deal with the rest of it. I was dazed for a few days." He timidly glanced back up at Gojyo. "I know you were in the same place as me. The Goddess said she'd try to help you, but she said she couldn't do anything as traumatic to you as she did to me, since I won't be using this body much longer anyway but your head needs to stay as it is. Did she at least try?"

"She tried, she did," Gojyo confirmed. "I appreciated it, she did help me put most of it together."

"That's good! Anyway, I'm okay now too." Aka smiled at the group, and Sanzo stepped forward and rested his hand atop Aka's head.

"I'm glad," he murmured sedately, and he slid his hand around, mussing Aka's little curls.

Aka turned pink again. "F-father..." Sanzo nodded, and Aka hugged onto him. Sanzo froze for a moment, and finally wrapped one arm around Aka's shoulders.

"So, I suppose you boys will not be coming along with us?" Hakkai asked. Sanzo and Gojyo watched both boys shake their heads in unison.

"Lady Kannon wants us to be safe and alive when you guys are headed home," Ryuji said. "Her number one priority, as far as we're concerned, is making sure we get back to you, with all of us in one piece. That means you as well as us, and since all of you seem to have this weird urge to protect us-"

"Oh, like that's a bad thing," Gojyo teased. Ryuji smiled, and lowered his eyes.

"Well, we can't let you get hurt trying to protect us. So, we're going to go back to Heaven, and wait there." He sighed deeply, and Gojyo looked down at his feet as well. He knew it was the right answer, but he hated the idea of losing them again.

"The other gods didn't really want to let us come down here at all," Aka added. "But Kanzeon Bosatsu insisted, saying you guys needed to know we were okay."

"And we are," Ryuji continued, looking back up at the group. "When the time comes, we'll be waiting for you. Just, not like this. These bodies are dead and gone. We're going to be Yohei and Eiji." His little smile suddenly had a wicked tilt. "And I promise, we're going to be a couple of rotten bastards."

"You said you'd spoil us," Aka snickered. "We're gonna hold you to it."

"Please, you guys are gonna have to beg to get me to punish you," Gojyo scoffed with a wide grin. "I'm gonna be a terrible father."

"I believe you," Aka giggled.

"We can't stay, but we should probably say a few last things." Ryuji nudged Aka, and he straightened up and stepped forward. He bowed at the waist towards Hakkai and Goku.

"You guys put up with me, as much of a wreck as I was. I wish I had been better to you, and I'm sorry."

"It's okay!" Goku grinned. "We're friends, right?"

"Definitely!" Aka agreed. Goku bounced forward and hugged him, and Aka let him. Hakkai stepped forward as well and leaned to meet Aka's eyes.

"We promise we'll be quite good to you. I, for one, am proud to be your uncle." He had his usual smile on, but it seemed much less painted-on than usual. Aka broke from Goku and embraced him.

"Thank you."He looked back to Sanzo. "And, uhm, Lord Sanzo- f-father-" He nervously broke away from Hakkai. "You treated me with undue kindness and understanding. Thank you."

"I understand you, Eiji," Sanzo murmured. "You deserved better than what we offered. I will make it up to you someday." Aka's cheeks were almost as red as his hair at this, and he hugged Sanzo again. This time, Sanzo caught his chest and held him tight until Aka broke away from him.

"Also?" Ryuji stepped forward and punched Gojyo lightly in the breast. "That's for what you said about my brother." He then stepped back and bowed. "And thank you for keeping me alive long enough to get me back here."

"And thank you all for getting us loose." Aka stepped beside him and bowed again. "We're really grateful."

"Nah, I'm grateful to you." Gojyo got on one knee in front of them and reached out to hold both of their shoulders. "You're everything I asked for before you were born. You're alive, you're healthy, and that's all I ever wanted."

"If I might..." Sanzo intimated, as he pulled out his gun. He opened the chamber, revealing the two bullets remaining. Hakkai was surprised that he hadn't reloaded his gun since leaving the sealed realm, but said nothing. Sanzo emptied the two bullets into his hand, and held them out. "Take these. A memento."

"Another one? Wow." Ryuji took one bullet and held it to the light. "If this keeps up, I'm going to have quite a collection by the time I get back to this world." He dug inside his robe, and pulled out an old blue headband. Gojyo gaped as he recognized it. Ryuji beamed, and tucked the bullet and headband back away.

"I didn't get a memento last time I visited," Aka pointed out as he took the other bullet. "But I like this one."

"Now I feel bad!" Gojyo laughed sheepishly. "I promise, I'll make it up to you next time."

"We both will," Sanzo added. The boys pocketed their mementos, and took a few steps backwards. They picked up their weapons, and Ryuji took a bracing breath.

"Our time is up. We have to go back." He grinned, and chirped, "So, for now, thanks Dad, Dad, uncle, cousin!"

"We love you guys! Just you wait, we're gonna make you both miserable!" Aka cheered happily.

"We love you too!" Gojyo replied, unable to stop smiling as the light shifted, and the pair vanished, light into light. Nothing remained but a few shallow footprints and the scant apple-sweet memories they'd given them.

"I'm glad they're okay!" Goku sighed contently. "Can I go back to sleep now?"

"I suppose we can have another hour or two before we go," Hakkai agreed, and he and Goku turned back towards the inn. Hakkai tossed something over his shoulder, and Gojyo caught and pocketed their room key. He slowly got up to his feet, ready to follow, but Sanzo grabbed his hand. He stopped, immobilized until the inn's doors shut and the two of them were alone on the dawn-lit street.

"What's up?" Gojyo turned to face Sanzo, still grinning.

"We are," Sanzo muttered humorlessly. Gojyo felt his smile fade.

"What's wrong?"

"I've been thinking." Sanzo loosened his grip. "Dad and Dad? Might get confusing."

"How long were you thinking this?" Gojyo cocked his brow.

"About a year ago. I pushed it from my mind until recent events reminded me." Sanzo looked unamused despite the fact that Gojyo was certain he was trying to make a joke. "My point remains. Perhaps they should call one of us something else."

"I say we let them decide. We know who we are, they'll know what they mean, and they'll figure out what to call us." He shrugged, but felt a pang in his chest as he felt one of his old insecurities crop up again. "What about me? What about you?"

"As in, what should you call me," Sanzo clarified. Gojyo braced himself, just waiting to be blown off. Sanzo's exact words did blow him away: "There is one thing." Gojyo looked up, as Sanzo frowned and added, "But only in private. Not even in front of the others."

"Whatever you say." Gojyo put his hand over his heart in an informal vow.

"Kouryuu." Sanzo looked away, as though embarrassed to say it. "My master called me that. I no longer use it. If it's any comfort to you, you may."

Gojyo immediately grinned and asked, "Can I say Kou for short?"

"Only into your fist," Sanzo snapped, and Gojyo laughed.

"I'll take it." His smile shifted, and he folded his arms. "Look, Sanzo... I'm sorry. I've been unfair to you. You never did anything wrong to me-"

"But I did, else you would have not had those illusions nor been able to believe them," Sanzo corrected him sternly. Gojyo could tell, however, that whatever anger he had was not directed at him. "Those illusions were your deepest fears realized, and fear is rooted in reality. I am real, aren't I?" Gojyo was speechless. "It's the way I've treated you this past year, and before that. That is the source of your fears. I was wrong, and I am sorry."

"You're sorry?" Gojyo blurted, stunned.

"Is it so surprising that I'm showing remorse for hurtful actions? Perhaps I don't do it often enough," Sanzo mused. He shook the thought away, and faced Gojyo head on, taking a step closer to him. "Clearly, though, you have forgotten what I told you, otherwise you may not have had such wandering thoughts." Gojyo almost frowned, but Sanzo held and squeezed his hand again. "Or perhaps I was unclear. Let me try once more." His other hand covered Gojyo's, clasping it tight, and he began to slowly explain, the way one would to a child: "You are no mere bodyguard nor comrade. You are a dear friend to me, and I hurt when you do. I never want to see harm come to you. I want to be near you, even when you frustrate and annoy me. I am here for you."

Gojyo didn't know what to say. "Sanzo... Kouryuu..." He swallowed hard. "I'm in love with you, y'know. I have been for a while now. It took me a while for my stupid brain to pick it up, but there you go." He sighed, smiled, and shook his head- he might as well have been a stammering teenage girl for how dignified he felt. "You don't have to feel the same, and I understand your feelings for me-"

"What are you blathering about?" Sanzo frowned and pursed his lips.

"What I'm tryin' to get at is, I wanna know if you do love me back!" Gojyo finally exclaimed. He felt himself shrink as Sanzo considered him with narrow eyes. He reached to grab Gojyo by the front of his jacket and pulled him close.

"Love you? Do I have to spell it out for you?" He lowered his voice and pressed his lips to Gojyo's ear. "Of course I love you. I love you like mad." Gojyo turned his head, and Sanzo took one last step closer and folded Gojyo's lips into his.

The whole world spun around Gojyo's head from the unexpected intensity of his kiss, the smell and taste of him. He was utterly, unspeakably delicious, sweet and bitter, enough to make him physically hungry and emotionally over-full. He wrapped both arms around Sanzo, and he reciprocated, pulling Gojyo in ever deeper, brushing his tongue against the inside of his cheek. Gojyo finally had to pull away to breathe, resting his palms on the small of Sanzo's back. The two shared a long, silent moment, with nothing to say and no air to breathe.

"Right in the middle of the street and everything," Gojyo chuckled after a minute. "That was awesome."

"Hm." Sanzo rubbed his lips on his sleeve. "But there you have it. Are you feeling better?"

"Yeah, loads." Gojyo grinned.

"And don't take that to mean I only said what I said to ease your mind," Sanzo added. "I meant it, and I'll follow through."

"I believe you," Gojyo assured him.

"Aka said he intended to make us miserable, after all." Sanzo cracked his knuckles. "One of us will have to put them over his knee, and I'm starting to doubt it will be you."

"Hey, I'll punish them! I was kidding!" Gojyo protested, stomping his foot. "I'll kick a toddler's ass!"

"Hmph. Like I believe that." Gojyo realized that Sanzo's face had changed- he wasn't smiling, but his eyes were. Gojyo could almost see a subtle smile concealed on his face, as if a deeply-hidden sentiment was peering through the creases of his ever-furrowed brow.

"I'll have you, at least." He took Sanzo's hand. "That's what matters."

He leaned in again, their lips meeting, their two hearts beating as one. Even if the next day, they would argue and gripe at one another, even if they squabbled their whole way to India and back, even if they couldn't find a single cake in India, the truth was now laid bare, pure and undeniable, for all to see. No miracles, no illusions, simply two men in passionate, violent, unstable, mad love, all thanks to the mercy of a fickle goddess.

And somewhere in Heaven, two boys watched, giggling and making gagging noises, but waiting for the day that love would be shared with them.

**END**

* * *

**End Notes:** With that, I think we have answered all of our questions. The wicked King is vanquished, the children are saved, the heroes kiss, and the author gets diabetes.

If it's of any interest, I had a LOT of trouble picking what I call the "victory song." I decided on this one over "Let the Rain" (by Sara Bareilles) and "Headlights" (by Morning Parade.) Somehow, I think going with "People as Places as People" is much more appropriate to Sanzo and Gojyo's relationship, if only for the line, "You're the places that I wanted to go" and the outro lyric, "You shouldn't have to ask." Not to mention the theming of the story's title originally coming from a Modest Mouse track. Well, if you'll pardon me, I need my insulin shot now.

… Wait, before I do that! Beloved audience, I have a question for you: _Do you want more?_

Because I have more. I do. I came up with a third part to this little tale. I'm not sure if anyone would want to read it though. I've kicked it around for a little while and even started writing some of it. The major caveat is that the one place the story can go from here is past the end of the manga, which Minekura-sensei has not yet released. I would have to make up my own ending to interpret from. What I had in mind is something of a "slice-of-life" drama with Sanzo and Gojyo getting on with their lives in the aftermath of their adventure with Yohei and Eiji in tow. I initially intended to title it "Rats Make Terrible Parents," but that might just end up the header for Part 1 of the story instead, as it would be a story in three parts. It would, at least at first, be much more lighthearted and hopefully funnier, and then delving deep into the remaining difficulties of their lives.

So, what do you think, everyone? Would you want to read that, or should I just leave the story here? If you guys are interested, I will happily start posting it in maybe a month or so.

Otherwise!

Do you have any further questions for me? Send me a private message, I'd be happy to answer!  
Comments? Suggestions? Review!  
Loved it? Hated it? Review! (Loves me some constructive criticism!)  
Are you interested in the sequel? Review! (And if you want to see anything in that, feel free to share!)  
Anything? Review! Nothing? Review because I love you!

Until next time, everyone!

**ETB, signing off!**


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